Member: Dave T
Location: Northern CA
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 14:39:35
Hello Iam an Alcoholic and my name is Dave
For myself I now know that a POWER greater than ourselfs will have to restore me to Sanity. I have tryed this on my own and again fell on my back side. But ever time that I turn myself over to My Higher Power which I just started callin GOD that I get to feel see that the things in my life are just as they should be. But I get off track some times and have to be made to look at myself and my life. For me this is a good thing to have happen. For I isolate myself,from all things in the world and then can get very down on myself. I run out of faith, love for myself or the few people that I let in my life. So I sometimes need reminded of the NEED to surrender myself to GOD. For without him I will not stay sober or have any type of Sanity. So I must thank AA for being there for me to come back to. Because without the Higher Power of GOD I would still be a drunk.(or a drinking drunk) I will keep comming back because it does work one day at a time
Member: MICHELLE C
Location: georgia
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 15:21:54
You are very right there.I thought I had all tha answers too. There is definately a power out there .I also call GOD.but right now my highest power is belief in the fellow ship.I know that maybe it should be belief in myself.But I;ve let me and others down to trust me right now.I'm only clean and sober 7 days.I only ask for one more day.God help me,i need to give the power to you.Please guide me.
I love my hubby of 13 years very much.He too battles alcohol.It isnt easy for either of us right now.Lots of stress.I m afraid. I need my higher power to love me right now. I dont love me. someone needs to.
I would love feedback from all imgeminii666@yahoo.com
or ocq me @ 30627979, thanks michelle c
Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 15:44:33
Larry, alcoholic
Thanks for the great share Dave.
I was a militant atheist when I came into AA. The only way I was able to give the program a chance was to use AA as my higher power and be willing to keep an open mind about the "spiritual angle", even though it looked pretty religious to me.
Coming to believe was a slow process for me. If I had waited until I "came to believe" before continuing to work the steps, I'd still be on Step 2 or drunk, or worse. Fortunately, I had a series of mini-spiritual experiences as I proceeded through the program. This gradual spiritual awakening has made a believer of me. I don't call my HP "God" or "Him" - many would consider me an agnostic - but I have a concept of a higher power that works for me. (I found the "Varieties of Religious Experience" to be very important in finding my HP, which it turns out had been with me the whole time!)
These mini-spiritual experiences included: having the compulsion to drink lifted; becoming aware of "guidance" that would reliably point me on the right path when I was in a dilemma; having the Promises begin to come true in my life; becoming more connected to myself, others, and my HP; and noticing the little "miracles" and "coincidences" that happen all the time.
So for me, "coming to believe" wasn't really a matter of blind faith. It was a matter of seeing and believing. I see myself becoming restored to sanity almost every day. I don't get drunk, blackout, and wake up in puke or blood or the emergency room or jail anymore. I don't frighten my family anymore. I am not consumed with rage, resentments, guilt, or shame anymore. I have peace-of-mind, serenity, and freedom from fear. I have seen these things happen in myself and I see them happening in others, all through the AA program.
Yes, I was a "doubting Thomas" - I had to see to believe - but that doesn't matter at this point. It doesn't really matter how we get here - everyone must take a slightly different path - all that matters is that we finally all end up on the same path: the Road of Happy Destiny.
Thanks for letting me share.
Peace & Serenity
Member: KERRY F.
Location: DELAWARE
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 16:52:08
HELLO KERRY F.ANOTHER GRATFUL ALCOHOLIC HERE. THIS STEP WAS ONE THAT I HAD TO BYPASS EARLY IN MY RECOVERY.MY WAY OF THINKING AT THAT TIME WAS THAT DOCTOR'S AND OTHER HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONALS WERE UNABLE TO HELP ME.WHY WOULD I EVEN BEGIN TO THINK THAT THIS GOD,WHO HAD DONE ME FEW FAVORS THUS FAR,WOULD BE ABLE TO HELP ME.BUT I DID GO OUT ON A LIM AND WENT AHEAD AND DID MY THIRD STEP.I HAD NOTHING TO LOSE.WELL ALMOST RIGHT AWAY A SERIES OF SMALL MIRICLES BEGAN TO TAKE PLACE IN MY LIFE.AND THEY HAVE BEEN ONGOING EVER SINCE.I COULD NO LONGER DENY WHAT WAS WRITTEN IN THE SECOND STEP. I HAD ALL THE PROOF I NEEDED THAT THERE WAS SOME KIND OF HIGHER POWER WORKING IN MY LIFE.AND IT CONTINUES TO WORK FOR ME EVERY DAY. TODAY I ENJOY A CLOSE AND PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THE ONE I CALL GOD.WITHOUT THIS HELP I REALLY DON'T THINK THAT THERE WOULD BE A PROGRAM FOR ME.
Member: Billy M
Location: Pascagoula, MS
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 17:12:21
I think this step says it all. At least on my end of this deal.. We came to believe. I remember sitting in a meeting one night after about eight months of soberity and I had the clear thought that hey I don't want to drink. I hadn't even thought of drinking for along time. I used to think of drinking all the time. I wonder what did that for me. I never could on my own. Any power that could keep me sober and not even thinking of drinking can do anything that he wants. Even restore me to sanity. I knew then that I had come to believe.
Member: Billy M
Location: Pascagoula, MS
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 17:13:27
I think this step says it all. At least on my end of this deal.. We came to believe. I remember sitting in a meeting one night after about eight months of soberity and I had the clear thought that hey I don't want to drink. I hadn't even thought of drinking for along time. I used to think of drinking all the time. I wonder what did that for me. I never could on my own. Any power that could keep me sober and not even thinking of drinking can do anything that he wants. Even restore me to sanity. I knew then that I had come to believe.
Member: Steve Q
Location: Illinois
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 17:38:51
Steve...alcoholic. Gentle step isn't it ? No doctrine, no dogma, no do it now, this way or that.Came to believe. The Creator of the universe allows me to come to this in my time, at my pace, patiently & lovingly, failing often and badly. So much like the parent that watches in excitement as the young child takes those weak, wobbly steps. Does the parent scold and disapprove when the child falls ? I've never known one to. I had to abandon the mean, judging , harsh deity that somehow got into my head along the way and was my mortal enemy. God is my parent, gentle and loving like a mother, confident and playful like a father.Restored ? Yea, most days restored to sanity. Not overnight, not on someone elses timetable. But restored.
Member: Bonnie C = 5/30/80
Location: Seattle
Date: 21 Feb 1999
Time: 20:25:38
Hi extended family, bonnie/alcoholic here, (((ROOM-HUG))) ((davet)) ((michellec)) ((larrym)) ((steveq)) ((billm)) ((kerryf)) thank you all for sharing, I love this program. STep-1 - i have no hope Step-2 - there is hope Step-3 I have a Partner in life, a good life is now possible. Now the work begins. here to tell you these arent lies, this program works. my life is proof. peace, hope and love lives with me daily. dont give up till YOUR miracle happens. love and hugs, bon == Dear God please bless all who venture here - bonzoc@webtv.net
Member: Jack C wanderers 3
Location: Friendship Wi
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 00:01:05
Hello to all of my family fellowship. I'm jack c, from wanderers 3 and I am an alcoholic and sober for many 24 hrs by the Grace of God, the AA program. Step 2 ! The biggest word we have in he program is "WE" Yes, we are never alone after step 1. WE CAME----WE CAME TO----WE CAME TO BELIEVE----That is a great wake up call, that comes, when WE take step one and are propelled into step two. A POWER greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Would restore us. Yes, as it says in, How it works, "That GOD could and would if HE were sought "--------We not only come to believe, we sought HIS help, and HIS grace, and somehow we knew, that HE would do for us, what we could never have done for ourselves. Step one was admitting. We all had to do that with no reservations. Step two, opened up the door for us to go through as a child goes to its mother, with a simple childlike faith that a HIGHER POWER could restore us to sanity. GLORY BE ! Step two works for us while awake and while asleep.
Member: PattiK
Location: Near Woodstock
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 00:14:16
Wow, Step 2, Came-Came to-Came to believe. I love that saying. It fits me. Oh sorry, I'm Patti K a definite alcoholic. In the beginning I thought there must be a higher power looking out for me or most likely I wouldn't be here, but today it is so much more, I'm knowing how to deal with situations that used to baffle me. I'm starting to see all of the promises coming true. God has not only lifted my compulsion to drink; I don't even entertain the thought anymore; He is starting to turn me into a WHOLE new person. My resentments are lifting. I know that I can't control anyone but me and my choices, and I was a very bad controll freak, always wanting to run the whole show. I no longer "can't stand" my mother who I blamed for all of my problems because I was very sure she didn't really love me. No one really loved me! Today I know it was me who didn't really love me. I could go on and on about all of the changes that are taking place in my life and in my heart, all thanks to finding and finally understanding this simple program that bought me to a new understanding of the love of God. No more foxhole prayers for me, now daily prayers for direction and direction is recieved. I never thought I could or would comprehend the word serenity, but today, while life isn't perfect[and I no longer expect it to be] I get moments, even longer intervals of serenity every day. Thank all of you for being here, may God bless you all and for those who are new and struggling, just stick around, have the will to believe and it will happen before you even notice it. It's happening to me and That is a miracle.
Member: David G.
Location: Kankakee, IL
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 11:25:53
I'm David and I am an alcoholic.
Today I am sober. This within itself is a great miracle. I am sober because of God's grace and intervention, the fellowship of this twelve step program, sponsorship and a home group, the Thursday Night Men's Step Study at 7PM in Kankakee, Illinois.
I recently redid my 2nd step and it was easy, "I STOPPED TRYING TO FIGURE IT ALL OUT!" When we do stop trying to figure it all out and rely on a Higher Power, things work. Today I'm a drunk who doesn't have to drink and for that I'm greatful and appreciative. God's peace to all and do it ODAT.
Member: Kathy F
Location: Carlisle,Ia
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 17:10:47
My name is Kathy and I am an alcoholic and a drug addict.
When I came into AA I had totally given up on God. I couldn't understand why bad things happened to good people and why I kept getting the worse. I hit a spot in my live when I told God to "F*** OFF" and let me run my own life because he sure wasn't doing a bang-up job. Then my life and drinking got worse. Then when I got "helped" into AA and got to working on the steps I said NO WAY - God can't help me. I was raised in Religion and in fact had a good friend who was a priest (although I thought he was wacked!!!) So I talked with him about my beliefs. He told me that I must believe in some form of a HP or God otherwise I wouldn't have told him to stay out of my life.
So I believed there was a God of some kind out there. But I'm not insane!!!!!!! I'm normal right, I just drink too much now and then. That's when someone told me their definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results. I did that everytime I picked up a drink.
So I came to believe their was a power greater than myself and I sure hoped he could restore me to sanity - nothing else could!
Member: Leigh D.
Location: Philadelphia
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 18:05:52
Hi. I'm Leigh, an alcoholic. I was brought up in a religious family and I believe strongly in my God. He has delivered to me a wonderful fiance, who is not dependent on alcohol as I am to deal with stress. I am afraid he will find out. His father was a recovered alcoholic and I am scared that if he should find out about my problem, I will lose him. I need desperately to find out the first real steps to take to be a whole and sober person, but I am scared that if I go to AA meetings he will figure it out. A little background on my family: my father drinks a bottle of wine almost every night.He never appeared drunk, but I don't know. I started drinking a few years ago when I dated an older guy who always brought home beer to drink after my parents were asleep, and we would raid the liquor cabinet when the beer was gone. Can just drinking a lot cause alcoholism? Becuase now I feel I need to get drunk about once a week. It isnt affecting my job or relationship yet but I want to know how to keep it from getting to that point. Any comments are appreciated. Thank you!
Member: Dave T
Location: NORTHERN CA
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 18:44:29
Leigh I did not have a problem with drinking. Just a drink or 2 well maybe 2 at a time. But when I was thinking that I did not have a problem with it was the time to look for help. Well I did not want to let anyone know that I had a Problem. But lost way to many years to drink Do something for yourself now not for anyone else just you and your GOD. All will be better for it. Do not waste your life to the bottle, {{{{PLEASE}}}} Dave an alcoholic
Member: Tim V
Location: Poconos PA
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 19:25:01
Hi, I'm Tim, alcoholic, treasurer. Don't forget to practice the 7th Tradition. Visit " Pass The Hat".
Member: Turtle B.
Location: Paso Robles
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 20:05:44
I'm Turtle B. and I'm an alcoholic.
Step 2, restore us to sanity. That step still gives me hope and I've head it said that hopeless is a dirty word but one I heard alot before AA. I visited "coffee pot" and it sure seems to get alot more attention than the Steps and Traditions. Thanks for sharing.
Member: mike e. a.
Location: ring of fire
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 22:06:14
what all of us haver written is true, that god or whatever we may call our "hp", we can overcome our alcoholism in many ways. he alone could give us the unending support and love that we truly need to be cured. let us always put in mind that when tempted to take one, hurriedly call his help and he'll take care of you! still cyber and sober, mike:)
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla!!!!
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 22:23:53
hello my name is richard i am an alcoholic!!!!!!!step #2 do each day..,right after step#1......it really does work...try believing for a change!!!!!!!!
Member: Susie W.
Location: New Preston, CT
Date: 22 Feb 1999
Time: 23:25:00
step 2 is an open-minded step, just like step one is an honesty step and step 3 is a willingness step. to be restored to sanity is to lose the obsession and the compulsion to pick up that first drink. to be restored to sanity means to me that i have not forgotten the consequences of drinking, that booze will always win and i will always lose. yesterday was my 19th anniversary, and i am so grateful. thanks for letting me share.
Member: Liz V
Location: New England
Date: 23 Feb 1999
Time: 10:20:06
Liz V; Alchoholic Step two has been tough for me because I have had a hard time with believing that God wants to help me. I believe now that He does. He brought me to this place; this day. Hi everyone. Please pray for me.
Member: louis l
Location: gatineau quebec canada
Date: 23 Feb 1999
Time: 12:50:02
louis alkie,congratulation susie w. on your 19th anniversary.thank you all for sharing such positive comments.it works."let go let god.thanks
Member: KERRY F.
Location: DELAWARE
Date: 23 Feb 1999
Time: 14:19:49
LEIGH, TRY AND REMEMBER THAT THIS ILNESS IS CUNNING ,BAFFLEING AND VERY POWERFUL.IF YOU THINK THAT YOU PERHAPS HAVE A PROBLEM,NOW WOULD BE THE TIME TO NIP THIS THING IN THE BUD.I'M ASSUMING THAT YOU ARE YOUNG SO I WOULD DEAL WITH THIS LIKE NOW.IF YOUR BOYFRIEND TRUELY LOOVES YOU HE WILL UNDERSTAND.BUT YOU SHOULD BE HONEST WITH HIM.WE ARE NOT BAD PEOPLE WE ARE SICK PEOPLE.AND WITH ANY ILLNESS TREATMENT IS REQIURED.GOOD LUCK
Member: Stuart
Location: Ann Arbor
Date: 23 Feb 1999
Time: 16:02:21
For me, Alcohol was my HP when I was using. I tried stopping on my own, with all the willpower I could muster. Yet, I could not stop drinking. I did not have a sufficient substitute. In AA I found a sufficient substitute. My HP is much greater than the alcohol and some drugs. My God has the Power to keep my a sober, a day at a time, for the rest of my life. It's worked a day at a time for the past 9 years, yet, it is only a beginning. This is a lifelong illness. I have Power (through my HP). I can be bold. My HP has that kind of Power. Now, it must be used in the right way, not just selfishly. I must give it away to keep it. So, here, come get it. It is the most awesome power. I like to get real high, that's why I have such an Awesome Higher Power. I used to like to party. I still do. I just don't use drugs and alcohol. I take my lifepartner with me everywhere.
Member: Geri W
Location: Virginia
Date: 23 Feb 1999
Time: 18:28:28
Geri, a very grateful alcoholic here. Leigh, call AA and they will help you. I'll keep you in my prayers. Now, before everyone "groans", I have to let you all know that my HP, whom I choose to call God, listens to this old drunk.My wonderful sponsor told me it was ok to pray even if I didn't believe in God, cause He believed in me. What a relief - He would restore me to sanity if I was willing to let Him. Man, I was willing to let someone take over, cause I had really messed it up. My best thinking and efforts had got me to a place that I needed to find something or I was dead. Today, I am mostly sane. A miracle. I no longer pray for anything but God's Will to be done. I ask that He provide comfort in His loving arms for those of us who are suffering for whatever reason. I trust that His will is so much better than anything I can dream up for myself or others. Yes I came to believe. It's like my sponsor said, it's OK, He believes in you.
Member: Mike N.
Location: Lansing,Mi
Date: 23 Feb 1999
Time: 23:24:41
I'm Mike and I am an alcoholic,not by choice and the last thing i ever wanted to be.I picked up a drink and life was never the same.Remember getting out of jail after wrecking my car and swore I would never drink again.I have a short memory and stopped by the bar to figure out where I went wrong.I have a built in fogetter and have to remember my last drunk.It is easy to remember pain when it is fresh in your mind but it goes away and the insantity to drink returns.The jay walker in the BIG BOOK fits me to a tee.We get better in spite of our selves.Come to know the nature of this desiese self deception.I'm not what I should be but I'm sure not what I used to be.
Member: Destine' W.
Location: Houston
Date: 24 Feb 1999
Time: 12:27:53
My name is Destine' & I'm an Alcoholic. At this time, I have to hold on to that Power that has restored me to sanity over & over again. I feel I don't have anywhere else to go except to Him and that's the way it should be. God is everything or He's nothing!
My disease is running wild. Im at home from work & feeling resentments for all at work. I know I can't continue like this. To drink for me is to die, so I have to seek spiritual help. This is the only proven solution for an Alcoholic like me.
Just for today, I have to pray for the willingness to be willing to be totally dependent on His infinite wisdome, not my finite self. I don't know what's best for me.
Member: Laurie C.
Location: Meriden, CT
Date: 24 Feb 1999
Time: 14:49:57
Hi, Laurie an alcoholic, Higher Power, God? whatever it is for whoever, whether I can truly believe God will help me or not I really don't have anything else to hang onto and truly help me through today, just hope and pray it does. For a long time now I've always thought that God actually hated me, instead of asking for help I would ask why He hated me so much. Why is this shit happening to me. Why is all this happening, why do You hate me? Then last week actually it sort of dawned on me, someone or something must be looking out for me cause I surely should be dead by now. After bouncing off 18 wheelers, hitting dump trucks, falling asleep at the wheel, waking up and not remembering what the hell happened last nite....there must be SOME reason I'm still here. Look at all I HAVE! I never realized how DAMN much I DO have! No drink is worth losing my life, my simple everyday things that LOTS of people just don't have! Funny thing was said at a meeting Monday nite, GOD, stands for Group Of Drunks.....when we all meet and ask GOD for help - in reality we are all drunks so I thought that was just funny. Just like HP911, don't think of Highway Patrol dial 911, think of Higher Power 911 stands for HELP. Thought that was interesting too. Thank you God for this. I know the day isn't over yet but I'm still here and sober and am working my ass off to stay this way - at least until tomorrow and tomorrow I'll ask God the same favor for the next day.
Thanks for listening.
L.
Member: Jim D
Location: Montana
Date: 24 Feb 1999
Time: 16:38:58
First time here, hi, Jim/Alcoholic. I am insane when drinking. I am insane to drink but over the past 5 years have chosen to deny the solution. This step simply states that I am insane to drink and that sanity CAN be restored. Woke up 3 days ago to see my wife with bruises on her face. Threw her against a stanchion, I don't remember it. Drank enough to kill most I think. The insanity is that for 10 days less that 15 years I was sober and pretty active in AA. Even helped other people, even sponsored. Then went insane and drank. The great forgettor went into overtime and then the great ego replaced the simple faith and trust in the HP. Got a DUI - went to class and was tested. The counselor said that I was certainly not denying the problem, just the solution. Insanity! Said to pay attention to step 2. I retorted that i obviously didn't get step 1. He said, "it's the insanity". Thanks for this site, thanks all for esharing. 3 days is 3 days. Still got all the literature and books, and right now the willingness.
Member: Bill J. 12 19 75
Location: Kingsville Texas
Date: 24 Feb 1999
Time: 18:12:50
Step 2 I had trouble with this step when I told old Jack (1st sponsor) I did not think I was insane he ask me if I had ever been in jail because of my drinking (he knew the answer) and I said yes. He ask what I did after I got out the next morning. I told him I stopped on the way home to get a 6 pack for after a night in jail I need a beer. He said don't you think that is insane to go back to the very thing that caused the problem. I had to agree that it was. Later I heard Ft. Martin say just think string beans . If you ate 2 cans of string beans and had the problems you did with alcohol you would never eat another string bean for the rest of your life. With alcohol we go back time after time. I have some sanity and as long as I let my higher power guide my life I think I can maintaine it.
Member: jack C wanderers 3
Location: Friendship Wi
Date: 24 Feb 1999
Time: 20:14:49
Hey Erv----Where are you-----We all need your coments----especially about your Higher Power's Help and the Sanity being somewhat restored I know I'm not as crazy as I once was, because I came and did believe in GOD that loved me and led me. GOD helps (GROUP OF DRUNKS0 ) INDIVIDUALLY AND COLLECTIVELY !
Member: Eric P.
Location:
Date: 24 Feb 1999
Time: 22:01:57
This is where I really feel the faith part of the program comes into play. For me I realized my soberity was something beyond myself it was a leap into faith. Carried by the affirmation of being a powerless alcoholic. My HP has taken me to a new zone of existence, the catalyst, unfortunately was extreme pain and suffering. Sanity for me is an new and genuine appreciation of the many things which were once before taking for granted.
Member: Nancy C.
Location: Chesterfield Ohio near Toledo
Date: 25 Feb 1999
Time: 08:59:46
Hi my name is Nancy and I am an alcoholic and a rotton speller.JIM I just want you to know that sobering up after being a once solid member is a brave thing to do. My sponser of 12 years went back out and I saw a woman that had wisdom strength and hope turn into a sick, sick person. It was very sad and hurt a lot to see but it just shows how powerful this disease is. I had problems before I ever picked up a drink problems that alcohol band aided I had no tools for dealing with my feelings fears angers life on lifes terms I didn't know that feelings of self doubt sadness anything other than HAPPY were part of the human condition. When alcohol didn't help anymore I was messed up cookie. A.A. gave me hope right away than the first time I felt feelings sober that were not HAPPY it scared the bajeebees out of me. That is when the trust and the work come in it still does.A pit fall that almost killed me sober was that after I had some time in I started trying to help others at the expense of staying in touch with myself. I couldn't share what was going on with me because I was so focused on helping others I really did not know. It is possable to hide a lifetime away doing this. In a nutshell I had to bottom out with this escape I didn't come into this program to be plastic I strive to be fully human and that means opening myself up to seeming weak (my fear) I can deal with that. I have also found that allowing myself to ask for help after longterm soberity also gives others permission to be and or get real. Think of me today as we trudge the road to happy destiny Love Nancy
Member: Liz W
Location: Coventry UK
Date: 25 Feb 1999
Time: 12:14:39
I have a habit of making everything complicated. Even trying to keep things simple seems complicated, so for me, Step 2 is not easy.
I have to believe in something bigger than me because I feel my ego is being smashed to pieces and I don't feel there is very much left. My problem was, and still is sometimes, that I really couldn't look at myself in the mirror and admit that I am insane. A few weeks ago I was ordered to get a blood test done for liver function. A week later a get a postcard saying 'you are required to attend' a doctor in a recovery unit out patients clinic. Go to any lengths I thought.. just do it. Today , as I try to keep things in the day, I went to that appointment. I asked the Doc what this was about. 'All in good time!' followed by a few questions. Stressed, tensed, feeling interrogated, video tape in the head going ten to the dozen. 'So what are you drinking and how much?' he asked. I'm not drinking - haven't done for 5 months. 'Why are you here?' he asked. I DON'T KNOW - you sent the postcard! I've been fretting about this for weeks! Who gave you my name. The doctor didn't know! The Doc then 'confesses' he's a Psychiatrist assessing for detox. I was convinced I was mad... and so was he!
The point: I forgot sometime ago that I had eventually come to believe in a power greater than myself and that my label for him was 'God'. If I had remembered.. I would have chatted to him and I would have found a bit of piece and quiet to allow myself to listen. Then the order of thoughts would have come and I might just have phoned up to ask why I was sent the appointment card in the first place and all this might not have happened at all.
I'll now stop looking at what might have been, look at what is and allow God to have a go at the sanity.
Through my little experience, God is watching as I trip and, when I allow him, teaching me lessons through my own and other peoples experience. This, with time, will restore me to some kind of sanity. I will have peace. All I have to do is listen, pray, meditate and learn. TRUST!
Thanks for listening.
Member: Debbie O
Location: California
Date: 25 Feb 1999
Time: 14:09:57
My name is Debbie I'm starting to understand how important it is for me to rely on my Higherpower. I had over three years clean and sober and relasped. I really did not reach out to anyone including my HigherPower.I did not want to lose my husband or my kids so i decided to reach out.I am praying more for Gods will today not Debbies will. And it seems to be helping. I now have four months.I also know what it means to be a gratefull alcoholic.
Member: Tom A. 7/25/60
Location: Carlisle, AR
Date: 25 Feb 1999
Time: 15:34:25
Good Afternoon! My name is Tom A. a grateful sober alcoholic today by the grace of God and this fellowship known as AA. I've been using Step 2, Tradition 2, and Pertinent Idea B during my prayer and meditation time each day. I believe Step 2 deals with my mental attitude and I'm convinced today that my Higher Power today is a loving God as expressed in our group conscience. I try daily to practice Steps 1, 2, and 3 in my life. I learned early in my sobiety from two little books that were put into my hands by someone who cared. They both suggest that Step 1, deals with the physcial aspect of my disease; Step 2 deals with the mental aspect of my disease; and Step 3 deals with the spiritual aspect of my disease. One of the books is called "The Little Red Book" and the other one is called "Stools and Bottles." One illustration from "Stools and Bottles" that is easy for me to remember is that Steps 1, 2, and 3 are like a three-legged milkstool. You need all three legs to milk that cow! I love all of you who share on this Staying Cyber meeting. May you enjoy your sobriety today!
God Bless - Tom A. ate@gte.net
Member: Jim B.
Location: Bethel, ME
Date: 25 Feb 1999
Time: 17:26:21
Hi, I am Jim and I am an alcoholic. With the first step out of the way, the second step poses a very different circumstance for me. With a diagnosed debilitating illness I must take medicine. However, I believe that the illness was brought on by over abuse of alcohol and mj. Nevertheless, they diagnosed me with schizophrenia. If that is not the epitome of insane, I don't know what is. So, the second step promises something for me not altogether foreign because I have been well acquainted with sanity before but something that due to alcohol and drug abuse has perpetuated a state not otherwise the case, I think. I always thought that God was something for other people until I reached the age of 19. Then, whamo, I was hit with an overwhelming urge to learn about what God means to me. I have had my ups and downs, in and out, but finally I am wholly convinced that God is there for me. It is up to me to mean what I say to him which comes with learning how to be honest. I don't know how to go about that but hopefully this time around I can stick to AA and learn. Motto: If I am faithful to AA, AA will be faithful to me. That means "sanity." Hooray! And it is amazing because it is already working after almost four months this time around. I think clearly; I am more or less a steady work, on time etc.; and I know that I can ALWAYS improve with God towards the long hard road back to sanity which is endless, everyday and one day at a time. Peace. -Jim
Member: Antonio I
Location: LA,CA
Date: 25 Feb 1999
Time: 23:25:09
Hi,my name is Antonio and I'm an alcoholic. I've only been sober for 4 days and can already feel the power feel the power of god. Today I was given a chance to work with to work in a great position which can lead to many opportunitys and I know the only way to keep my life this good by giving my is to beleive in god and be sober-thanks Antonio if you know of any gay meetings for men in 20's please e-mail TZI98LO@aol.com
Member: Marty B
Location: Calif
Date: 26 Feb 1999
Time: 00:17:01
After a year and a half I am working the steps one at a time with my sponsor (changed sponsors recently). With step two I looked at my progress during the last year and a half and realized that I definately had come to believe that there is a power greater than myself. I had done this fairly early on but had not realized it until just recently. I knew without a doubt that my sanity is returning more each day. I am able to recognize situations (resentments) as they happen and deal with them in a rational way. In looking back I could never have done this by myself. During the early darkness of sobriety I was by a fellow AA'er to pray for help in different situations and there were times where the outcome was so positive that it scared me. After a bit I really did come to believe in a Higher Power - don't know what that looks like yet but just know there is one and have been giving my life to my HP every day. I am having some difficulty dealing with a 90 year old mother who must be moved to an assisted care living situation and she is very unhappy with me for that but on my sponsors suggestion I have turned her over to our HP to allow her life to be the best it can be. This surely relieved me from the need to carry this burden all alone. Thank You all for being here and here's to another 24!!
Member: Connie
Location: STL
Date: 26 Feb 1999
Time: 16:53:09
Hi everyone,
My problem is Connie and I am an alcoholic; Came to believe a that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
I can actually say today, I really do believe that, it has taken me many obstacles in my life to actually see I am not doing this program of AA alone. I have a HP there to guide me through my situation, when I turn it over to him. Just this past week I had a situation that was very difficult for me. And very unhealthy to. I had to let go, however, before I could let it go, I had to admit I was powerless over it, and then I had to turn it over. I gave it all to God, cause I couldn't hande. If I didn't do this, I know somewhere down the line, a drink would follow. AA really does work, one moment at a time.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ROOM}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}hugs and I love you all
Member: Leta A
Location: Florida
Date: 26 Feb 1999
Time: 18:00:59
Hey,
I'm Leta, an alcoholic. Steps 2 and 3 are my favorites. I think they define the basic principles of AA. Through 25 years of drinking God saved my life several times. But I was selfish, I usually took and didn't give much back to God. Five years ago God got my attention. I became involved with an evil person, and I knew that I had to be sober to deal with the situation. AA showed me how to survive in sobriety. The more I turn my life over to God, the more I can see the wonderful miracles He puts in my life. He is always here for us, we just need to be willing to see that.
Member: Jewels
Location: Ontario
Date: 26 Feb 1999
Time: 18:26:13
Step 2 was so important to me when I first came into the program. I did not get what everyone at meetings said about the Serenity Prayer, but I felt so much anxiety at the beginning. I would go for long walks and say, "came to believe that a power greater than outselves could restore us to sanity." It kept me going, kept me sober through those first few months. I am so grateful to AA. My home group is also a 12 and 12 meeting. We read one step or tradition and discuss it every week. I love AA. Thanks to all on this web site too for being there.
Member: Jill W.
Location: Massachusetts
Date: 26 Feb 1999
Time: 21:34:08
Hi. I'm Jill - an alcoholic. "Came to believe a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity". This was a very important step for me. I always had faith in some way or another but somehow since coming into the program it's different. When I first got sober, it was sugggested to me that I get on my knees and ask a power greater than myself to keep me away from a drink for that day. I was extremely desperate and I took that suggestion and many others. It worked! When I got on my knees and talked to my Higher Power my day went a lot smoother and was much better than when I tried to go it alone. I've been sober now 14 months and I just recently "came to believe". If you're new and you don't know what to do - try it. You got nothing to lose except maybe having a bad day. Thanks.
Member: Christine M.
Location: Bayville, NJ
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 03:14:40
Hi, my name is Christine and I am an alcoholic.
Many, Many wonderful shares! I was particularly touched by LARRY M. and STEVE Q..
Like LARRY, I had trouble with what I thought was the "religious" side of this program. I was not comfortable with the whole "higher power" concept for a long time...even after I was sober awhile. I love the saying, I CAME, I CAME TO and then I CAME TO BELIEVE.
I was very rebellious when I first started attending AA. Refused to say the Lord's Prayer at the close of the meeting, that type of thing. I didn't take a lot of the suggestions, but I did take two. I CAME, (because I had to, court ordered) and I TRIED TO KEEP AN OPEN MIND. My spiritual awakening was also slow. Just by taking those two suggestions I left myself open that anything could be possible. It took time, but thru a variety of experiences, I eventually came to believe in a power greater than myself and that power could and actually had restored me to sanity.
I am grateful that I had kind, loving, gentle, supportive recovering alcoholics around me who allowed me develop my own concept of a higher power and in my own time. I don't think I would have gotten sober had I had militant AA zealots jamming THEIR concept of a higher power down my throat in THEIR time. My HP gave me what I needed to get and stay sober for the past almost 10 years and yours will too.
KEEP COMING AND TRY TO KEEP AN OPEN MIND.
DON'T LEAVE (10 MINUTES) BEFORE THE MIRACLE HAPPENS (IN YOUR LIFE)
Thank you for letting me share.
With Love and Peace,
Christine M.
Member: rose
Location: georgia
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 06:04:10
I came to believe there was a power greater than myself to restore my sanity. and i really dont understand why this happened to me to such a life changing occasion. i grew up in a family that went to church, my parents dont drink, never have, i think that made the forbidden fruit or drink that much more desirable. i have grown with my relationship with God all through my life, leaving him out and begging for help for him to change this person he had made. i didnt understand if God didnt make no junk, then why did he make this drinking so bad in my life, why couldnt i have fun drinking like the others. i still wonder this as to did he make me an alcoholic and let me see this light so that i may stop and help others. i always wanted to be a nurse or help others. maybe this is what HE had planned for me. anyway, i have definately gone through an experience that has changed my life since attending aa. and even if i cant figure it out, it seems to work so im going to keep an open mind. my mind has been tricking me lately into thinking i havent had a drink for a week, it would be ok , it is saturday night, it wouldnt hurt anything really. that is problem i am having right now. thinking about it would be great to taste that beer and smoke that cigarette, which i also dont do hardly unless i drink. thanks for letting me share.
Member: Douig
Location: California
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 11:55:36
The trouble I've had with Step 2 is Step 1. If there's a power greater than myself, why the hell can't he/she/it give me the power over alcohol and drugs? This is a "cheating" problem I've had throughout life -- I'm the proverbial "hare" who doesn't want to start on the first rung of the ladder.
Luckily, I really do believe in a higher power -- I have through most of life, although I've often shunned it because I thought I was being punished or, worse, ignored. I now know that the only time I can truly connect with this power is when I'm stone cold sober -- not just free of drink and drug, but also standing with both feet planted firmly on the ground. I know that I'm irreparably nuts when I'm not in this state. If I'm drinking, I can't be helped -- only if I'm sober do I have any chance at sanity.
Member: Roger P.
Location: Canada
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 13:21:34
I consider myself lucky to be anywhere because I'm sober. Step 2 was key. My first sponsor was fanatical about the KISS principle. Used to say that defining a higher power was my business which it was but that, based on KISS, I was complicating the other part of the step too much. Sanity was not some complicated psychological definition of a personality disorder. Insanity was the act of taking the first drink. Since step 2 is so close to step 1, this still makes ultimate sense to me so I use it this way still. There are a lot of other steps to deal with the more complicated forms of insanity so I think this idea is useful for a complicated person like me.
Member: Kristi
Location: KCMO
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 16:15:51
If I think back on my life, I can now see where my higher power had his hand out to me, but because of my drinking I refused to grab it. My mind was closed. I was a victim, or I was ok, and did not have a problem. Now that I have come to the realization that I am an alcoholic, the issue of my higher power is wonderful. I listen to him, I take his hand and he guides me through my day. I'm not saying that it's all fluffy and white, there are times when I am confused or plain angry at my higher power, but I have to tell myself that everything in my life is in his hands. All I need to do is to work my program and not drink, he does the rest. To Rose in Georgia: I have read your other post in the Coffie Pot, and I suggest that you go to a meeting tonight or call someone, because remember: WE ARE POWERLESS OVER ALCOHOL and the cravings may take over if we don't ask for help. We cannot do this alone, we need AA and our Higher Power. It sounds like you could use some 12th step help. That's all Good Luck to you and remember this is a simple program but we have to work it!!!!
Member: Roy S.
Location:
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 17:19:06
As I look back on my life, I have come to see that there had to be a higher power both during my drinking as well as now, because I put myself into so many positions where I could have seriously injured myself or others, but I didn't. It could have been luck or chance, but I really don't believe that is all it was after further examination. I truly believe that my higher power has kept me safe, and now it is time to put that to good use instead of self-destructive. There are times when I feel that my higher power has deserted me, but when I look back, I realize that it is the other way around. That's all for now - thanks for letting me share.
Member: paul z
Location: new york
Date: 27 Feb 1999
Time: 21:35:31
when I first took my second step I think it was more hope than anything else, when I got to AA I was such a mess I did not think there was any help for me, but when I got here I realized I was not alone and that they all at one time felt like me, but they found a way out. They had something I wanted and at that time they, AA as a whole was my higher power.That was all I needed to begin my belief in a higher power. Since then my faith has grown and I now call my higher power god, and it has been almost 5 years since then. thank you
Member: TedW
Location: Grants Pass
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 00:21:22
When I came to AA 22 years ago I was an atheist.How did I come to believe? First of all, I had to become open-minded:suffering did that for me. I progressed from an attitude of beligerent denial of the existence of God to an attitude of "hey,how do I know,maybe there is a God."It doesnt seem like much but it was progress. Also listening to other who claimed to have had a spiritual awakening, and taking their suggestions also helped. I later came to realize that not everyone who claims to have had a spiritual awakening has had one. I listened to the right people however, thank God..
Member: rose
Location: georgia
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 06:24:45
to kristi . . . thanks for the support. i will have to look up the 12th step. im new and do not always understand what the steps are. but anyhow i did not take that first drink, through Gods help and your support. i am happy to say 8 days for me and hubby. we are helping each other.