Member: Rick R.
Location: U.A.E.
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 12:50 AM

Comments

Hi, everybody Rick R. (alcoholic) in the Middle East. Abu Dhabi, the capital of the United Arab Emirates. We're on the backside (east) of Saudi Arabia. I'm 10 time zones ahead of the US time (GMT +4), so for me, it is Sunday morning, though for you still Saturday night. Before you gasp and say, "Oh what a terrible place to be..." let me say I chose my country well. It is the safest place in the middle east. I suspect I am safer here than many of you might be in cities back stateside. Okay, to the topic. I have been sober since Friday morning, something over 48 hours. Of course, I am in serious withdrawl, but I keep telling myself I am feeling better and AM better than coming in with the shakes or still under the influence. And I do feel better. Praise the Lord. (If I'm allowed to say that here) I've discovered there are AA meetings here in town. They're across town, at the Anglican church and meet 3 times a week, Sat, Mon, and Wed, following our work week (Sat-Wed). They're at a terrible time for my body clock, but I guess new routines are in order. So Wed night will be my first meeting. Will be the first sober weekend I have spent in, I can't remember how long. Boy, what a total mind-shift I'm facing, but I'm glad of it. I have the mother of all headaches, but at night I steadfastly refuse to take anything at all, not even Tylenol PM. I will do it straight, clean and sober or not at all. It's funny. I had a sister who died last spring. She was a multiple addict and post-polio syndrome as well. She was a wreck. Died of a massive heart attack after decades of self-abuse. She was 51. The irony of this is that she had all the literature from AA. I saw it all when I home on leave in Sept/Oct. Had I known I would need it, I could have taken any or all. Hindsight, foresight, farsight. Time to go. Pray for me.


Member: Kelly M
Location: New Hampshire
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 01:45 AM

Comments

Rick R., Congratulations on 48 hours without a drink! You made it past the worst part. You may be able to get some AA literature at the meeting on Wednesday. I had a best friend in High School that was from Saudi Arabia. Wish I had kept in touch with her. I'll say a prayer for you and take it one day at a time.... Kelly


Member: Thomas M.
Location: S. Fla
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 05:44 AM

Comments

Hang in there Rick and Cecilia, well said Claire and a happy and sober 24 to everyone.


Member: Cindy K
Location:
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 08:14 AM

Comments

This is my first time to this site. I desperately need your support. I know I am an alcoholic -- I just don't know how to stop drinking. That sounds idiotic...you just don't lift the drink to your mouth...but I have tried so many times to stop, and I don't understand why I can't. The longest I've made it sober was about 3 weeks -- I was so proud of myself -- it felt like 3 years...but it was so easy to slide right back into the old routine. I'm so discouraged right now and so tired of feeling this way. I don't want to do this any more!!! Someone please give me hope. I feel so STUCK.


Member: anonymous alcoholic (DOS 12/12/90)
Location: 2689 Ridgecrest Drive
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 08:47 AM

Comments

Hi. Good topic. I was just saying yesterday that I didn't like change when I first joined the program. Truth is I still don't like change. I prefer things to stay the same, even if things aren't exactly working! I know that sounds dumb, but that the way my mind works. The familiar is better than the new/unknown for me. Thanks for letting me share. (p.s. it's a good thing I discovered a higher power in this program. this higher power has been doing for me what i could not - or would not - do for myself for almost 12 years. and for that i am eternally grateful)


Member: Tara J
Location:
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 11:05 AM

Comments

I'm finally taking a look at my drinking, because I find that frequently it is causing behaviors that I don't experience sober. Behaviors where I definitely am not in control of myself. I guess the truth is that I'm afraid to let it go. At times that drink is so comforting. Meeting for a drink and having a drink are how I am social with others. I guess I'm fearful of who I might be sober, but I'm also tired of disliking myself for drinking.


Member: Lonnie S.
Location: Forestburg
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 02:30 PM

Comments

Cindy, you have my support. Find a AA meeting. Work the 12 steps. I have been sober less than a month. I went to a AA meeting today, that was my 3rd meeting. I have been posting here on a daily basis, sometimes more. I didn't know how to work the steps until someone else posted a web site www.sober.org. This helped me understand how to work the steps and what to read in the Big Book. I am still in fear of attending meetings but each time I go it gets a little easier. I will pray for you. About the telephone. I called everyone I knew and confessed. Looking back, maybe not such a wise decision. I think finding other Alcoholics who have some sobriety under their belt and who are working the program is a much better path to take when you decide to use the telephone. Thanks for being here everyone. Stay Sober. Peace


Member: Phil M
Location:
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 02:53 PM

Comments

Cindy, find AA. Your life will begin again, mine did. I wasn't able to quit and stay quit by myself. I needed AA. It opens the door and gives you the help you need. It was hard to imagine a life without alchol until I saw others who managed to stay sober. Don't give up.


Member: Kathy P.
Location: Mass
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 02:58 PM

Comments

Hi Cindy K. and welcome to the site. We are all struggling alcoholics here and most of us are also new to sobriety. I am going on 18 days myself. No one here can offer a cure or quick fix of course (much as we would all like one!) but everyone does offer support, encouragement and occasionally inspiration. It does help as we all live out our daily struggle to stay sober and believe me, we need all the support we can get! All I can advise is to get help wherever you can. Many here support going to the AA meetings, relying on a "higher power" and finding an AA sponser etc. Whatever works. Good luck and keep checking in. We are all behind you.


Member: Cecilia D
Location: Chapel Hill, NC
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 05:17 PM

Comments

Thanks Thomas, and to anyone reading this post, I made it through yesterday -- I called my sponsor(use that phone)and she reminded me to take it easy or easy does it. Also I went to a speaker meeting at AA and the speaker was great. Thanks to all. Hang in there Cindy and Tara. God bless you all. Cecilia


Member: Caressa R.
Location: Vero Beach Florida
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 05:24 PM

Comments

hi this is mt first time on this site and i think it is wonder full i can relate to everything that has been said here in this site and i am living with two active alcoholics they are mt parents and i am really trying not to let them rent space in head cause i have found that when people rent space i focuse on them and not on me problem and i would like some help how to distance yourself from your own parents. i really don't want to relapes agin!


Member: Cecilia D
Location: Chapel Hill, NC
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 05:27 PM

Comments

Congratulations Rick Keep it up -- I do it one day at a time even when it's hard. I pray for you. Cecilia


Member: Mela
Location: Cleveland
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 05:46 PM

Comments

Hey Rick and Cindy, just don't quit till the miracle happens! Hang in there you'll be allright. The first thing I was told was to get on my knees in the morning and ask God to keep me sober that day, then to thank him at nite. My God has kept me sober one day at a time for 8 years now. Drag your butts to meetings. Shake hands and meet people. It gets better I promise.


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 06:17 PM

Comments

Hi all, JohnA Here an alcoholic.We all used the Telephone when we where drunk as you had no fear. But that may have changed now you are sober as the fear may have come back, Why not phone someone you did not see at your last meeting and see if they are ok, If you are new to AA, phone the last pearson that gave you there phone number and thank them for giving it to you. It will make there day and make yours. I`v Just been to a meeting to night and did not see an old boy that I know, I will phone him in the morning to see if he is ok and check he is going to the some meeting as me Tomorrow night.I have a fear of the phone, but its getting better the more AA members I phone. It makes me feel better knowing I have carried the AA message to help others. The Telephone is a tool (an AA meeting if you cannot get to a meeting)I am 7 Months sober today. So Telephone someone today.....Keep Sober...Keep comming back and sharing. Thanks JohnA


Member: caprice c
Location: usa
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 06:45 PM

Comments

i am trying very hard to stay sober. I am bipolar and drinkink is what i use as self medication. it is not good with my meds. i have been sober a very short time but each day counts. hope to stay sober know it is hard work lokking for a local support group and frriends have not found one yet. so help me by listening thanks


Member: Karen P.
Location: Wrightsville & Atlanta, GA
Date: November 17, 2002
Time: 09:33 PM

Comments

Hello, I'm Karen, and I'm an alcoholic. Am in my eighth month and just starting on my 4th step, tenuously, but starting. I still have thoughts of drinking. I know there are old-timers who say AA isn't about alcohol, but for me it still is. There are many times when it feels like a drink is just what I need to calm the anxiety in me. I know better, but that's what I want anyway. So far, so good, even though driving past liquor stores catches my attention every time. I'm wondering if there is anyone who is in a similar place emotionally. All support is welcome. By the way, I e-mail my sponsor everyday that I am out of town (I work away from my home during the week). She has invited me to telephone when she is not available by e-mail, and I have a long-distance calling card, so I will. Will check in tomorrow.


Member: Gage
Location: LA
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 12:55 AM

Comments

I'm Gage and I am an alcoholic. KAREN P., go ahead and take that 4th step. The day will come when the thought of a drink will repulse you. Just keep moving. That goes for all of us. Let's keep moving and hold onto one another along the way. Love to you all.


Member: Ryan
Location: New Mexico
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 09:49 AM

Comments

Ryan alcoholic I have been sober about 3 weeks now,and starting to feel better.I have not found a sponsor yet but would like to have somebody to call at certain times. I just found this site and relate to everything that is said,and will try to find a meeting.


Member: Steve C
Location: Caribbean
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 10:45 AM

Comments

I was sitting in a bar on saturday morning at 11am after dragging myself out of bed at 10am having got home at 4am, Drunk. So I turn to a friend of mine at the bar and over my 3rd beer for the morning say "Hello my names Steve and I'm an alcoholic". I thought it was a joke when I said it. At 9pm that evening I had my last beer and realised that what I had said that morning was no joke. Since then I've been dealing with severe anxiety and guilt. I just found this site and can relate to what everyone is saying and have got hold of my local AA number and will be attending as soon as there is a meeting. I never thought this could happen to me. I always told myself that I'm fine, all my friends drink more than me, they've got the problem, not me. Therin lies the problem. So 27 hrs since my last drink. I'm gonna check back later and read some more posts. Hang in there.....


Member: MIKE BLODGETT
Location: ANGOLA,INDIANA
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 10:46 AM

Comments

HELLO CINDY K, I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL GIRL. NOT DRINKING IS THE HARDEST THING I HAVE EVER HAD TO DO. IT WILL WORK, IT DOES WORK, IT HAS TO WORK, OR ALL OF US DRUNKS WOULDNT BE ON HERE. EMAIL ME IF YOU LIKE. MICHAELBLODGETT@HOTMAIL.COM


Member: mike blodgett
Location: angola,indiana
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 11:06 AM

Comments

Hello Karen P. Im very glad your on here. This site is very cool because you can talk 24/7 if need be. Email me if you like michaelblodgett@hotmail.com I will always be available for a conversation. I give my last name because my name has been in the paper so many times it's not annonomous for me. Who cares, Im a drunk, and a damn good one. I do everything 110%. Now its NOT DRINKING!!! Keep trying. mike


Member: Lonnie S.
Location: Forestburg
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 12:05 PM

Comments

Steve you can do it. I am now just figuring out how to feel a little more at ease with my sobriety. I really had not surrendered to the disease. Yesterday after the AA meeting I attended I felt really uneasy. I realize now it was the fact that I opened up in front of people I did not know. It is much easier to post on this board. I know I have spent many months hiding out on my Farm avoiding people. I need that people contact even if they say things I don't like or don't want to hear. The pity party has to stop. Everyone have a Great Week. Many Blessings.


Member: Rosanna B
Location: Queens, NewYork
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 12:41 PM

Comments

CINDY,I want you to know that I feel exactly how you do so you are not alone, trust me. I was sober for one month and then I drank two days ago when I went out for my sisters 30th birthday, we went out dancing and it was almost impossible not to drink. I called everyone I knew that is living a sober life and told them what I have done, thinking they would be angry with me instead they told me not to get discouraged or give up, so now I'm starting all over again. It seems like not drinking is the most difficult thing I ever had to do. The support is always needed,so always use it. Good luck and stay sober


Member: Nicole G.
Location: Minneapolis (living in Barcelona)
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 12:56 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, Nicole, alcoholic, sober by the grace of God, sponsorship and Alcoholics Anonymous since 9/5/97. Cindy, if you think you have a problem with alcohol I can tell you what has worked to keep me sober. I am a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. A good place to start would be to go to an AA meeting. If you dont know where to find meetings you can look up AA or Alcoholics Anonymous in your local phone book. There will be a number that you can call and the people there will be able to tell you where to find a meeting. Once you get to a meeting it is good to get a sponsor. A sponsor is a person, usually another woman, who has more sobriety that you do and has experience staying sober. They can help you figure out how to stay sober in AA. For me it was really helpful to hang out with other women alcoholics, go to a LOT of meetings, read the big book (AAs basic text), and talk with other drunks. As a result of working the 12 steps of AA (our recovery program) my life has changed. I no longer have the desire to drink, it has been totally removed from me. I live a life that is happy, joyous, and free. I have great relationships with my family and friends, and most importantly I am comfortable with who I am. You dont ever have to drink again. If you go to AA, get a sponsor, and try and listen to her, your life will change. Good luck and God Bless! If I can help at all feel free to email me, nicolergerman@yahoo.com. Welcome to everyone new, keep coming back and talk to your sponsor! May god bless you and keep you, Nicole G.


Member: buddy b
Location:
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 01:44 PM

Comments


Member: buddy b
Location:
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 01:45 PM

Comments

hi i am new to this site hi all


Member: J-Rae
Location: N.D.
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 01:53 PM

Comments

Hello everyone, and welcome to all who are new to sobriety, or thinking you may have a problem with alcohol. USING THE TELEPHONE...Great topic. I was told when I first came to AA that before I decided to pick up a drink, to use the phone and call a recovering alcoholic. The phone is a tool today, to use if we will. Just as motor vehicles are used for what we need. Just as electricity is a tool for daily living. When in early sobriety, or even later on, and suffering the pains of life, picking up that phone and sharing with another alcoholic the thoughts and feelings that plague me helps immensely. Many times those on the other end of that phone line have had the same experiences, and share their solutions....of which include... Get to A face to face AA meeting, get a sponsor to help you work the steps, read, and STUDY the 'Big Book' (Alcoholics Anonymous), and don't drink in between, one day, sometimes one hour or minute at a time. You are NOT alone. You only have to go through the pains of early sobriety once, if you choose. There are many other recovering alcoholics out there who will gladly help you, because, in order to keep what we have, we need to give it away. What was so freely given to us, can be yours for the taking. It is simple, although not always easy. A desperate being asked of his maker, "How do I keep from getting deeper in this hole of despair?" The answer was, "Stop digging". I wish all of you well, and Keep coming Back. The tool of the internet is, remember, possible through the phone line, so keep coming here with your questions, and share when you feel the need to. ~J-Rae


Member: Babette R
Location: Jerusalem
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 03:07 PM

Comments

I'm Babette and I'm an alcoholic and addict. ((Rosanna B)) There is no shame in falling down, the shave is when you don't get up. As one who has relapsed countless times, the saying ""Don't quit quitting' really helped me. Hang in theer, the hardest part is admitting it and you've already done that. I have 9 months clean and sober and still have a problem picking up the phone. I can call my sponsor every day, no problem, but it's calling other people that I find difficult. I try to do it though and usually am pleasantly surprised. SSome people are just too busy to talk and I' ve had to learn not to take that as rejection. It's hard to do sometimes, but most of the time the person on the other end of the line is just as happy as you are for calling.


Member: Joe P
Location: Chicago
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 05:14 PM

Comments

My name is Joe, and I am an alcoholic. Rick R Hang in there and get to those meetings as soon as you can. Cindy K By myself, I will justify drinking again. That is why I attend regular face to face AA meetings. I get drunk, but together WE stay sober. Our problem is not just stopping drinking, it is staying stopped. Call your local AA office and get to a meeting if at all possible. Tara J It may look scary from where you are now to stop drinking, but I discovered that life is a wonderful and fun adventure sober. Caressa One of the ways I put distance between myself and others who drink was to attend A LOT of AA meetings. Lonnie S People in AA usually recommend using the telephone to call OTHERS IN AA for support. Ryan Please do find some face to face meetings. Steve C WTG on your first 24 hours! Dont drink One Day at a Time, and let us know how you are doing hooking up with meetings. Re: Using the Telephone: Ill assume that basic dialing instructions are unnecessary. I would recommend women call women and men call men. Calling others in AA is a matter of practice. It does not matter if you have anything particular to talk about, just call to say hello. That may feel awkward at first, but give it a try anyway. If you dont practice calling people when you dont have a problem, you may not call when you really need to. Its also good preventive medicine. I call my sponsor or another male AA daily, problems or not. Part of what keeps the problems away is that daily practice. It is really great reading all of your posts here. It reminds me of when I first came to AA. You all help me remember that the miracles continue to occur! Keep at it! Love and service, Joe joep041699@mindspring.com


Member: Eve
Location: Sacramento
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 05:31 PM

Comments

Caprice & Caressa welcome to this site.(Caressa) that is tough. Both my parents were alcoholics. My Father is dead from the disease and other related health problems and my Mother is still drinking. I don't live near her but haven't resolved the problems related to her or my Dad. I had a incident the other day that was a reminder of that. The only advice I can give you is try to find another place to live. If that is not possible at this time, work towards that goal. Get to AA meetings. Find a sponsor. Read from the Big Book and learn to work the steps and lastly, Pray for yourself and for your parents. (Caprice) I can't imagine how you must feel. I have a nursing background and I know that Alcohol will only make your Bipolar condition worst and have a adverse or toxic effect when mixed with your medications. Find some support AA. Read over your medication information. Speak to your Doctor about your drinking. Good Luck to you Both and my Prayers are with you. Caressa, I liked the rent space in my head, that made me laugh and really think about my head and the many slots I have had opened to fill with other peoples stuff.


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 06:52 PM

Comments

Hi buddy b welcome, u can read or share its upto u. But if you need help you are on the right web site. I`v Just come back from a step meeting, we where reading step 6, not that I am at this step, but it was nice to here how others had done this step. we also had a chat before the meeting about using the phone, we where chating about Country where members can not get to a meeting from one week to the next, so the phone is there only contact with other members, WE where just saying how Lucky we are in Manchester(UK) as there are over 150 meetings a week. Keep coming back..... JohnA


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 06:52 PM

Comments

Hi buddy b welcome, u can read or share its upto u. But if you need help you are on the right web site. I`v Just come back from a step meeting, we where reading step 6, not that I am at this step, but it was nice to here how others had done this step. we also had a chat before the meeting about using the phone, we where chating about Country where members can not get to a meeting from one week to the next, so the phone is there only contact with other members, WE where just saying how Lucky we are in Manchester(UK) as there are over 150 meetings a week. Keep coming back..... JohnA


Member: Shannon
Location: MS
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 08:19 PM

Comments

Hi All, Shannon, alcoholic/addict. Great day to be 4 months sober! Using the phone-great topic. At first it was somewhat difficult for me, especially when I would call someone AFTER I used. (pretty bright, huh) My sponsor suggested I get the phone #'s of 10 other women in AA. At first, I was shocked. But what for!?! Of course, I did it anyways. And It has been great. I never run out of people to talk to about my day or my sobriety. And I never run out of having to listen either. If I don't call them, they call me. We have an extremely strong, compassionate circle of women who all support eachother, and are not affraid to "tell it like it is". Anytime I slip into self pity or denial, no dout that they will stop me abruptly. They are a great prevention plan. Congrats to everyone on staying sober!


Member: Karen P.
Location: Wrightsville & Atlanta, GA
Date: November 18, 2002
Time: 09:37 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Karen, alcoholic. I am 8 1/2 months sober and it still amazes me how many people are commnitted to sobriety. I need to know that. It helps me stay committed. I don't use the telephone much because it is long-distance from where I live and work during the week to anyone I would call, especially my sponsor. We do e-mail and occasionally catch each other on MSN messenger, and can chat with her awhile. It is good to stay in touch, and especially to have someone to tell about it when I'm having a particularly bad (or good) day. Thank all of you for being here.


Member: Sarah M.
Location:
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 01:10 AM

Comments

I'm starting to think it's impossible to stay sober when night after night, he is drinking and blaming every problem that we have on me NOT drinking. I was so much more fun then - he says.


Member: LoriC
Location: Florida
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 01:47 AM

Comments

A Gift From God There I was to my surprise Living life as a compromise If I choose to live my life wrong You'll hear me singing a sad o'l song BooHoo poor o'l me Just can't get alcohol free Take step one then step two You've come this far now follow it through Here I am with my Higher Power I feel like I am on top of the Eiffel Tower Now we come to the real story Step 4 our fearless and moral inventory Right about now were probably saying I want a drink instead of praying Take into consideration we've grown up hellions Full of fear, denial and allot of rebellion Alcohol is pure body pollution Working the steps you'll find the solution Now we come to a padlocked door A door we never wanted to open before Granted there is allot of time involved But won't you be happy once it's all solved Time to take on a new attitude The reward is great it's called gratitude Staying sober is a desire and ability One of the key words is total humility Our timing our thoughts and judgments are wrong Often wondering where do we belong Look at all of my personal defects I wonder how many people it effects Oh no another inventory When will I ever see the peace and the glory Is it your blind or you just can't see Let me say your not fooling me You can fake all the steps that work Your Higher Power knows he is the clerk We come to these rooms to learn and to share If it didn't work there would be no one there. Lori Ann C Telephone was my life line when first back in the rooms, I even called crisis lines (often) It helps both you and the person you call. The second thing I did was write poetry. It gave me a look at who I was and just how screwed up my thinking had become. I had to set realistic expectations because I had always set such high ones of myself that I set myself up for major dissapointments. You get out of this program what you put into it, nothing more and nothing less. God has each and every one of us. We are nothing less than miracles to be sitting behind a keyboard some where in the universe, never having laid eyes on eachother and communicating our struggles. Life is good, it is how I percieve it that is screwed up and that is what I have to change on a constant baisis, even after being in these rooms for a bit. Keep it simple and give yourself a pat on the back for making it 24 hrs or 48 or 3 months. Change your negative thoughts to possitive ones each time they enter your head. God Bless each and every one of you :) You're in my prayers.


Member: Lori C
Location: Florida
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 01:51 AM

Comments

I apologize as something strange happend when I hit submit my text is jumbled alltogether. Sigh!!


Member: Lori C
Location: Florida
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 01:52 AM

Comments

I apologize as something strange happend when I hit submit my text is jumbled alltogether. Sigh!!


Member: Rick
Location: U.A.E.
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 03:49 AM

Comments

Hi, Everybody Rick R., camel jockey (alcoholic) Four and a half days sober. I'm in terra incognita, and delighted to find myself here. Looking so forward to my first meeting. John A in Manchester, the meeting should be mostly British, so I will think of you at the meeting. I had a tiny crisis last night. Was so used to having a can of beer ready at hand, (Must be somewhat like a smoker.) I envetually decided to go make myself a cup of tea. It was lovely and civilised (John A, the s is for you). Hope to get some phone numbers and start networking. Thinking about all my cronies who will eventually start calling asking to come over. I unplugged my phone months ago. I was looped and in no mood to be talking to anybody. A real stay-at-home bah! humbug! type. "Visitors are not welcome. GO AWAY!!" Anything that would interfere with beer consumption. Boy, I was in fine shape. A hateful, tiny little package, all wrapped up in myself. Repeating that none of the battles have come yet. Have begun to have quiet times and have other things to think about now. I'm sober and have my appetite back. Our weekend starts tomorrow (Thurs/Fri) and it will be my first sober weekend in eons. So, to all us newbies, let's all hang together or we shall surely hang separately.


Member: mike blodgett
Location: angola,indiana
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 08:35 AM

Comments

Hello Rosanna B. Dont worry about what happened. I have more last day chips than a Vegas Casino. I am well over six months now. It gets alot better. Every single hour of each and every day. I woke up this morning and it is pouring, cold, and dreary out. I thought to myself, this is a beautiful place we live in, and im sober. My name is Mike Blodgett and Im a Prof. Alcoholic. michaelblodgett@hotmail.com


Member: Mike W.
Location: Hillsdale, Michigan USA
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 08:55 AM

Comments

Hi Everyone, Mike, Gettin better Alcoholic Here. I am Going to try to stay in the solution today and not in the problem. I Didn't have to wake up with a hangover or the shakes and I know that I'm among the fortunate ones today. I Need to ask for all your prayers, I think that God answers Prayers and I need Yours!!!! Especially for my Wife Who is recovering From Surgery that God would Bless her and HELP me . She's in a lot of pain and she's sometimes "the biggest bitch in the world but I'm fortunate to have her. Anyone who's been with me during 16 years of active Drinking/drugging is bound to be a bit nuerotic but God' been good to us through this all. We've got 3 sons and 1 daughter, 12-23.. and an ACOA freind of my sons and an ACOA cousin with little Baby boy living with us.(Ruined marriges, Warped children,all a result of the behaivior and demons that come as a result of the piss poor choices of those that don't have any other choice than to act out in the only way they've learned. That's why I come To AA, to learn how to live life on lifes terms without having to drink over them. One of my Kid's (the 16 year old boy) is taking up where I left off some 4 years ago and is probubly facing some "Hard time" MDOC style... My Two oldest kids Like womenizing, Chasing the party, and then theorizing how that Christ paid the penalty for all their sins ,,... so enjoy life and live like the Devil.. !??well, Like I Said, I Need your Prayers cause I can't Do a darn Thing other than Keep myself sober, Try to practice Those Principles, Steps, in ALL my affairs , Trust God, Clean House, and HELP OTHERS,, if nobody's told you that they love you today, I'm telling you that I love you.! Thanks for Helping me to stay sober today ! Mike W. E-mail plumbfitter2000@yahoo.com


Member: Jim
Location:
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 01:44 PM

Comments

Good Job RickR keep it up and don't go out and get that first beer,I know the feeling.


Member: Steve C
Location: Caribbean
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 01:47 PM

Comments

Hey Thanks for kind words and encouragement... Thanks Joe P and Lonnie S especially... It's my 3rd day now... Had a massive headache last night, the kind that only a beer can get rid of... but drank water instead... I felt great this morning... And am having a great day at work!... (did I realy just say that?).... It's great reading all this an feeling a part of your lives and working together to beat this thing!... Hey Rick R... Looks like we're in the same boat this weekend! my first one sober in ages too!... Hang in there everyone...


Member: Kathy P.
Location: Mass
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 03:29 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, Kathy P. here and I am an alcoholic. Whew! That is the first time I have ever acknowledged that to anyone, including myself. It actually feels like a relief. I am three weeks sober today, thanks to all of you and your never flagging support. It's been a tough three weeks but the other day I got my hands on some AA literature and reading that has helped boost my resolve to stay sober. What amazes me about the stories I have read in the books and heard from all of you is how much of it mirrors my own struggles with alcohol. Like many others, I'm sure, my first thought was "this stuff could have written just about me!" I guess that just goes to show that our story is a universal one and we all experience pretty much the same feelings of despair, denial and loss as well as shattered goals and beliefs. Unlike some others I haven't lost my job, home or family, but I have lost my self-respect and my reputation among some friends and family members who have seen me at my drunken worst, including my own children. That's a hard enough blow for me to deal with. But I am still in my 40's and hoping with all my heart that there are enough years ahead of me to show these people that I have changed and that I am not going to let alcohol ever make a fool out of me again. Thank you all so much for your kind words of encourgement and inspiration. Ann Q. of England, I especially identified with your thoughts and comments. Let's all continue to row this boat together until we've all reach safe and sober ground. Best to you all.


Member: Rusty
Location: Metro West Mass.
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 03:48 PM

Comments

Where and how do I start. I go to work every day. Never miss a beat. But at 3:30ish when Im done it's right to the American Legion for me and a few drinks... sometimes just 2 or 3 or sometimes 6-8. It has become a habit that I can not break. But by 8 o'clock for some reason I don't drink. It's like an internal clock that says HEY it's 4pm time for a drink... (Manhattans usually) Any ideas to break this cycle folks. I admire you all for your resolve and stick to it attitude. Thanks in advance Rusty


Member: Peter W
Location: Texas
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 05:30 PM

Comments

Hello everyone and congratulations to you all, this is the beginning of a wonderful life. By the grace of God, the help of AA, and a small effort on my part, I have been physically sober for 975 days and I am as grateful today as I know how to be. I started getting sober by going to 90 meetings in 90 days(actually more, getting a sponsor(in the first two weeks), and working the steps. It WILL work for you. The following are the promises that AA makes to those who follow the program - keep them close-- "If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. Love to you all, Peter


Member: Karen P.
Location: Wrightsville & Atlanta, GA
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 07:01 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Karen, alcoholic. Not much to say today but thought I would check in. I appreciate y'all being here. Don't drink, no matter what.


Member: Anna W
Location: FL
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 07:15 PM

Comments

Hello everyone, Anna here alcoholic,I am in my 5th month of sobriety and yes those promises will come true. You have to work the steps to get your freedom. I just finished step 4 and it was a relief of alot of things. I call my sponsor everyday. I am commited to my continued sobriety no matter what it takes. Get you a sponsor and pick up that phone. Go to AA meetings and build you an army. A list of phone numbers. I am thankful for another day of being sober and I am thankful for my AA family. Thanks


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 07:17 PM

Comments

Hi Rick R, Hope yourfirst meeting went well. JohnA


Member: caprice c
Location:
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 07:48 PM

Comments

well i am still sober. it is very hard sometimes people at work want to go to bars and i want to so i can socialize but know i will probably end up drinking right now hope that changes with time. i should go to meetings but i am shy and wont speak up. sounds like a sponsor would be a lot of help though. so i am thinking on it a little more.


Member: Gill K.
Location: Memphis, TN
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 07:56 PM

Comments

I have read the early sobriety meeting with great interest. I am only 3 days sober after 10 years of various short periods of sobriety. My addiction has progressed and there is no enjoyment at all, yet I somehow go for one more attempt and one more failure. Got a sponsor, who says start today, working steps. Another old timer said I haven't set any records, so start today and do the right thing. I hope I am sick enough of myself and desparate enough to surrender. I don't want to live drunk and leave that legacy to my children. I know AA can work miracles, I see them at every meeting. Wish all of you well


Member: Lonnie S.
Location: Forestburg
Date: November 19, 2002
Time: 10:36 PM

Comments

Lonnie, recovering Alcoholic. Today has gone better. I worked outside with my plants. It was a beautiful day outside. Mike W., you have my prayers. Steve, Great Job. Joe, you are right. I called people not in AA. What can I say I am learning. I either don't say anything or confess everything to whoever I can corner. Energy vamp, I can be. Caprice, go to AA meetings and yes find a sponsor. You don't have to talk at the meetings if you don't want to. Sara, I went through the same thing with my husband. Please, Please, stay sober. Find AA meetings to attend. Thank God, my husband stopped as well. If your husband sees the change in you he may want it as well. Love and Light to Everyone.


Member: terrified
Location: I'll die
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 06:23 AM

Comments

i don't understand the language these people use! do u? just bin on the 12x12. confused and scared. they've all got a different opinion. bunch of nutters. surely consistency is what i need. G.O.D. good orderly direction. yeah thats it "orderly". can i please have some.


Member: Jessie
Location: TX
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 07:45 AM

Comments

I can relate to you, "terrified." I don't understand the lingo there either. This board is one I can relate to though. I'm beginning my 4th day sober, after finally admiting to myself that I have a problem with drinking. Realizing that though its a bit scary to be sober it was scarier not remembering what I did during and after drinking. I haven't decided if AA is for me. I've met some self rightous AAers recently. One in particular, who, though sober is having sex galore. He called and suggested that I call a woman friend of his, an AA member, because she might be someone I'd like to have as a "mentor." Boy that pissed me off. The next night I went out drinking and blacked out on my return home. Hated it all so much the next day! I'm through with it! Realized how drinking has been holding me back the past 20 years, and especially the past year. I don't know about AA, but I do like the support of someone to talk to.


Member: chrissi s
Location: Holidaying in Gran Canaria
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 07:45 AM

Comments

Hi to everyone, Not got time to comment individually. Congratulations to everyone staying away from a drink. I was particularly touched by what Rick R said. Congratulations mate. I am on holiday in Gran Canaria at the moment and havent felt the need to drink any of the loopy juice. Cant say Ive had a lot to do with that, I think its a miracle. Ive been sober for 4 months one day at a time. I never thought that one day would be possible at one time, but with the help of this fellowship and my HP I feel so much healthier and calmer. Stay away from the first drink and get to plenty of meeting is my advice. Love Chrissi chrissismall@yahoo.com


Member: Kristina H
Location: Columbus, OH
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 08:06 AM

Comments

I'm here to say that I'm so tired of feeling 'out of control' when I drink...it's never just a few. It's like I don't want to stop because I LOVE the feeling I have the more I drink to get get drunk. I'm more outgoing, etc...But I'm tired of feeling hungover, I'm tired of doing things that I regret the next day or don't even rememeber doing:( It's time for me to get help...I've gotten sober before when I was 20 years old but five years later I'm drinking again because I thought I could just drink 'socically'...that's NOT the case. It's hard at my age to quit alone because it's such a part of this culture & my age group...so I'm reaching out...you can reach me at KElizabeth23@aol.com.


Member: Bill P.
Location: Michigan
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 09:21 AM

Comments

Kristina H. - Thanks for checking in here. Find a meeting in your area. They will welcome you with open arms. You don't have to say anything if you don't want to. If you can't make it to a meeting, this site has many who can give you their stories that may help you understand your feelings. The only thing that is important right now is that you have a true desire to stop drinking. If that is true, then there is hope, and "WE" can help you. You see, "WE" help each other in this recovery program and that's how it works. It does work. I would strongly recommend finding another woman to talk with. That will be a big help. Good luck and God Bless you.


Member: Craig L (Dogmanor@yahoo.com)
Location: Aloha, Oregon
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 10:52 AM

Comments

One of the first assignments my sponsor gave to me was to call 5 people in the program during the week between our sponsor meeting. I did not do this, because I was afraid I would be bothering you. You did not want to hear my problems. When I did finally pick up the phone and call someone, I felt awkward and stupid. Every group I went to gave out printed member lists with numbers, some groups passed a schedule around so we could give our numbers to the new comer in that meeting. I printed up cards on my computer with my number and email and hand them out freely. I check in here every week leaving my email address every time. I have given my own contact information out thousands of time, but have rarely ever gotten a call or an email. What a thrill it is to hear from someone new who is trying to get this and stay sober. We need each other to do it. Im still not the greatest phone person, but every time I decided to call someone, I always feel much better and more sober. You only have to change one thing. Everything!! Get over yourself, pick up the phone and send out those emails, get honest with someone. Time to grow up.


Member: Mark A
Location: San Diego
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 11:51 AM

Comments

I am Mark and only 15 hours sober. The most I can stay away from drink is about two weeks. I need help. I am a Professional and I sometimes have difficulty relating to some of the folks at AA meetings. But I know I will have to find a meeting where I can fit in. I am just moving to San Diego. Does anyone know of a good meeting there?


Member: Will R.
Location: Georgia
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 12:55 PM

Comments

Once again I'm back trying to plug into AA. I can't (or won't or something) stay away from drinking beer or old playmates and places. I really don't know how to make the program work. I need help and I'm completely powerless to change anything when it comes to drinking.


Member: Lonnie S.
Location: Forestburg
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 01:12 PM

Comments

Everyone stay sober. Something I have to keep reminding myself of is, NOT one of us is exactly like each other. WE do have this dis-ease in common. The self-righteous AA members, hey there are self-righteous people where ever you go. I look at that as man I don't want to be like that. Even though I have been guilty of that myself in certain areas of my life. Terrified, I still don't understand the language either. I didn't even understand how to work step one in the 12 steps. Web site that explains this program is www.sober.org. I have been reading there on a daily basis. Now the light bulb is beginning to go on. Get a copy of the AA Big Book and honestly find meetings to attend. I have heard it said that the success rate for AA is higher then any other program. I think that speaks for itself.


Member: Roanne
Location: MA
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 03:00 PM

Comments

Congrats Kathy on three weeks.Roanne,alcoholic here. We had a birthday party for my son. I invited all the aunts and uncles and grandparents. At the end of the evening I was the only adult there not drinking. No one was drunk, but the alcohol present caused me to white knuckle the entire day. I love these people and want them around but I am still afraid to be honest with them. That day I felt alone and isolated. I don't want to feel this way for the Holidays comming up. I am so angry to be an alcoholic. I know I'm whining but it really feels unfair. I understand HALT, and use the phone, and other AA tactics will help. I was a late night, isolated drinker. I don't want to be that way again.Thanks


Member: frank e.
Location: dickson,tn.
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 03:07 PM

Comments

Hi family!Cindy K,Rick R & any other newcomer,it`s not silly to NOT know how to stop drinking.I certainly did not.Iknew I wanted to stop,but for some unknown reason at that time I could not.Today thanks to AA I know the problem & have found the solution!Find meetings (fxf),get a sponsor & begin your journey.This program is more powerful than anything I have come across,except for my God.This is a program of action,you have to be Willing to put forth effort.It definatly payed off for myself & a couple hundred million others.Thanks AA,& I thank my God.fwex2@yahoo.com


Member: AZbill
Location: Sierra Vista, Arizona
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 03:41 PM

Comments

HI. Bill here. Alcoholic from Arizona. Sometime during my first year I put myself on the 12 Step call list at the Central Office in Denver, Colorado. Over the next several years, Central would call me and give me a number to call. I must have called hundreds of people over that period of time. I have a 100% success rate. I never took a drink. :) The phone call helps two people. The one who calls and the one who answers. Thank you for being a part of my sobriety today. Bill; email: az-bill@mindspring.com


Member: Will R.
Location: Georgia
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 04:33 PM

Comments

I'm going to a meeting tonight after work. Hoping something will be shared that gets through my thick alchoholic brain. I keep hearing the voices that say life and good times will be over if you put down the bottle. I know they are lies but still real. I have a question: What is the best way, if any, to find a sponsor? I've got to try and do this thing right this time around.


Member: To Will R
Location: From AZbill
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 05:08 PM

Comments

Will R.....At your meeting tonight look for an AA pamphlet titled.."Questions and Answers om Sponorship. All the information is you need is in there. Bill: az-bill@mindspring.com


Member: Donna
Location: Fl
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 06:36 PM

Comments

Donna here alcoholic. Without this program I would never have found out how to live & be happy. I was a every day drinker & I thought life sucked. Everyday I would wake up saying shit here comes another day. It is no longer like that. I too thought I would have no fun if I quit drinking. After I got the booze out of my system I realized I had not had fun in a long time. Picking up the phone was not easy for me, I too made all the excuses not to but once I started doing so it got easier. Today I love to hear from newcomers its what helps keep me sober. I love this site as it reminds me how I was when I found these rooms. The way I started staying sober was asking God each morning to help me not take a drink & when I didn't to thank him at night. That was all I said & I did not get on my knees to start with. I talked with lots of sober people went to lots & lots of meetings. Got a sponsor who helped me work the steps. Without a sponsor I would have not been able to work the steps according to the big book. Another helpful tool was big book studies. The book is a text to be studied not just read. I also had a lot of speaker tapes given to me when I got squirely & could not reach someone or make a meeting. Good luck to all & stick around for your miracle to happen. If it worked for me it will work for anyone.


Member: Will R.
Location: Georgia
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 07:39 PM

Comments

AZ Bill, Thanks, I'll look for the pamphlet. I'm leaving now for the meeting. Anxiety is building and fear is trying to creep in but hoping the meeting will clear some of that.


Member: Robin Z
Location: NY
Date: November 20, 2002
Time: 07:42 PM

Comments

Hi, I am Robin Z. I have been sober 9 days now. (Roanne)I was also a late night solitary drinker. I dont want to go back either. I relate to everyone posting in one way or another and it actualy makes mw stronger knowing that I am not alone. I have not gone to a face2face meeting yet but I hope to some day(I think). It makes me nervous. Thanks for reading Robin


Member: jessie
Location: TX
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 12:34 AM

Comments

Went to a meeting. Felt totally uncomfortable for the first half hour. the second half was okay. not sure if another one will happen. I guess we'll see how tomorrow goes. Came home made a phone call to a sponsor. Heard her story. She heard a bit of mine. She told me I could call anytime. She didn't offer to meet with me or to help me with the steps. I guess I need to ask. I didn't. Don't really know what I'm doing, but I'm not drinking and that's good, right? I feel all this energy and clarity. It's frightening, because I'm afraid of how awesome I'm gonna be when I don't have alcohol holding me back anymore. I want to be that person, but at the same time, I'm scared.


Member: carmen I
Location: brookhaven , Pa
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 01:40 AM

Comments

H.A.L.T its plain and simple hungry, angry, lonely , tired just be basic dont try to be sober 10 years when you only have 10 days! one step , one day , even take baby steps if you have to. Sobriety has to be worked on 24 hours a day. you will all understand it in time i have been sober 5 years and some of the things I hear I dont understand either KEEP COMING BACK JUST HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF.


Member: carmen I
Location: brookhaven , Pa
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 01:40 AM

Comments

H.A.L.T its plain and simple hungry, angry, lonely , tired just be basic dont try to be sober 10 years when you only have 10 days! one step , one day , even take baby steps if you have to. Sobriety has to be worked on 24 hours a day. you will all understand it in time i have been sober 5 years and some of the things I hear I dont understand either KEEP COMING BACK JUST HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF.


Member: mike
Location: angola, Indiana
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 08:16 AM

Comments

Hello Rusty, get a part time job from 4:00 pm until the next aa meeting. michaelblodgett@hotmail.com


Member: Jim K
Location: PA
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 10:15 AM

Comments

Hello All, I'm Jim and I'm an alcoholic. I am 18 days without a drink today. The topic of the telephone is interesting since it was the use of the telephoe during my most recent lost weekend that prompted me to quit again. For the most part I stayed away from the phone when I drank because I didn't want to be discovered. This thought process will probably hold me back from calling others now that I am working on staying sober. But as someone pointed out in an earlier post I am using the phone line to check in and learn from everyone posting here. From my last sobriety (6 monhs in length) I learned that this disease is subtle in it's early stages. I went back to drinking because I felt I had learned enough and had built up a tool kit that would keep me from binge drinking. And for the first month or so it worked. Long about the seventh week one or two drinks became multiple uncounted drinks and the monster was out of the cage and back in control. Fortunately that lasted only one month and by the grace of God I saw clearly through bloodshot eyes. Good luck to you all. God Bless! Jim


Member: Hamish
Location: Sydney, Australia
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 10:33 AM

Comments

Mark A in San Diego - you will find a meeting that's right for you but you may have to try several and this may take some time! maybe months. I will warn you against pre-judging. Mark,I only mention this because I have been guilty in this area (very guilty -particularly in my early recovery). Above all, in early recovery go to meetings - ANY MEETINGS because firstly you won't make it alone and secondly and most importantly if you look for the similarities and NOT the differences you may be pleasantly surprised (I know I was). You should try actively looking for the similarities in what people are saying, their experiences & feelings, reactions etc etc. There is always something on offer that will benefit you. Always. I hope this has been of some help. If you phone any AA office or help line they will be more than happy to tell you of meetings in the area you are moving to. Mark in San Diego, keep coming back.


Member: Denise W
Location: Californis
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 11:09 AM

Comments


Member: Denise W
Location: California
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 11:24 AM

Comments

Cindy, when your thinking about quitting drinking don't imagine the rest of your life without being able to drink. Pull yourself back to today. Just take one day at a time and when your mind goes wandering, bring it back to the day. If you can possibly do it, physically go to a AA meeting. Try to get to 90 meetings in 90 days, with the same thought process, "One day at a time" I really believe we Alcoholics have an allergy to alcohol. We are unable to drink because of the chemicle reaction our bodies have when we put alcohol in them. I don't know your belief in a Higher Power, but mine is God. You need to believe that He can help you stop drinking. And you need to realize that it's not a willpower thing. They say "Let go and Let God", but you have to believe and have faith that God will help you if you only ask. Get yourself to some meetings and really listen to people's hearts and souls. That's how this program works.


Member: Bill L
Location: NW Oregon
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 11:57 AM

Comments

Hi folks, Bill here, an alcoholic. Firstly, congrats to everyone that has decided that they are like us and need to find a way to live a better life. It certainly isn't an easy choice, definitely not for this drunk. The telephone was a terrifying thing for me when I drank. I never knew when I would be slurring badly, so I got caller ID to screen my calls. Then I would turn off my answering machine so I didn't have to hear the worried messages. The last thing I wanted was contact with people, because I knew I was different. My first attempt at sobriety occured because I used the phone and confessed my problems to my mom. She knew already, of course, but was grateful that I finally knew. Today I use the phone all the time. Partly for work, partly to stay in touch with my family, and partly to stay in touch with my sober friends. I don't need a reason to call an AA person, I just do it to say hi and they know it is just a conversation. It helps me remember that there are other people like me. To Rusty, I used to do the same thing, but it got worse and worse for me. One thing that worked for me is to meet friends after work for exercise or sightseeing. Visit Winthrop or the South Shore, walk along the Charles River, or go shopping at Chestnut Mall. Yeah, I used to live in Boston, until it no longer worked for me (too many people knew about me). I also joined Boston Ski and Sports Club, and did activities 2-3 nights a week. Basically, do ANYTHING to keep you away from the AL. Even a few hours should do it, and when you get hungry, EAT!!! It may be that those alcohol calories are what your body is attracted to, so go out to dinner with work mates instead. Pick someone that you don't want to drink around to ease up on that pressure. You might even try calling the AA central office and asking for someone to call you, then offer to meet that person for dinner. Anything works, and is better than drinking. Stay strong :-)


Member: Bill L
Location: NW Oregon
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 12:06 PM

Comments

Hi folks, Bill here, an alcoholic. Firstly, congrats to everyone that has decided that they are like us and need to find a way to live a better life. It certainly isn't an easy choice, definitely not for this drunk. The telephone was a terrifying thing for me when I drank. I never knew when I would be slurring badly, so I got caller ID to screen my calls. Then I would turn off my answering machine so I didn't have to hear the worried messages. The last thing I wanted was contact with people, because I knew I was different. My first attempt at sobriety occured because I used the phone and confessed my problems to my mom. She knew already, of course, but was grateful that I finally knew. Today I use the phone all the time. Partly for work, partly to stay in touch with my family, and partly to stay in touch with my sober friends. I don't need a reason to call an AA person, I just do it to say hi and they know it is just a conversation. It helps me remember that there are other people like me. To Rusty, I used to do the same thing, but it got worse and worse for me. One thing that worked for me is to meet friends after work for exercise or sightseeing. Visit Winthrop or the South Shore, walk along the Charles River, or go shopping at Chestnut Mall. Yeah, I used to live in Boston, until it no longer worked for me (too many people knew about me). I also joined Boston Ski and Sports Club, and did activities 2-3 nights a week. Basically, do ANYTHING to keep you away from the AL. Even a few hours should do it, and when you get hungry, EAT!!! It may be that those alcohol calories are what your body is attracted to, so go out to dinner with work mates instead. Pick someone that you don't want to drink around to ease up on that pressure. You might even try calling the AA central office and asking for someone to call you, then offer to meet that person for dinner. Anything works, and is better than drinking. Stay strong :-)


Member: Lonnie S.
Location: Forestburg
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 02:18 PM

Comments

Lonnie, Alcoholic. Going to a speaker AA meeting tonight. I will have one month of sobriety. I am still emotionally very up and down, I cry a lot. Did the pitty party again last night. I think I will get a tea set and every time I go into the pity party mode, I will have myself a tea party. I read from a recovery book this morning about having your Health (physical) and how I should praise God for that. I am very lucky it did not affect my physical health. Have A Sober Day. Thanks for listening and for being here everyone.


Member: Lorraine W
Location: London
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 04:29 PM

Comments

Hi Everybody, I'm Lorraine and I'm an alcoholic and have been for about 15 years. I'm glad to find this site.... I don't feel so isolated anymore. This is my 48th hour sober... the longest I have ever lasted is 21 days. I have been to AA meetings before but chickened out on the phone thing... didn't want to bother anybody and eventually the call of the drink got the better of me again when I couldn't seem to locate my higher power. I am going to a meeting tomorrow to try and make myself better again. If I don't I may very well lose the person I love most in the world. I can relate to all of you and congratulate you all on being sober. It's a good thing to know you are all here and that together we may all be able to pull ourselves through. I am happy for people to contact me at lorrainewalsh30@hotmail.com. I am convinced that alcohol is a greater evil than money... after all look how much money it uses up. I can't remember ever having been so much in debt.


Member: Karen P.
Location: Wrightsville & Atlanta, GA
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 07:36 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Karen, alcoholic. Nine months ago I would have been trying to figure out how to best manipulate my partner into agreeing to have some wine. Then, of course, I would drink more than agreed to, sometimes slipping into the kitchen and drinking it out of the bottle, or putting more in my glass and drinking some before I brought it out to the TV room. I am 8 1/2 months sober, and it is still about alcohol for me. But then I'm just starting my 4th step and dragging my heels all the way. I've told my sponsor to kick my butt and she is. I just need to listen and get to more meetings than I've been to lately. Thanks Mike for your e-mail. I've written you back. Take care, and don't drink, no matter what!


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 07:40 PM

Comments

Hi All, JohnA alcoholic, Lorraine W I hope finding this site and going to another meeting may help keep u sober longer this time.Dont chickened out this time, we are all here for one thing, to stay sober and help each other. I went to my first meeting 7 months ago,it is the best thing I have done in my life. Keep comming BACK. Best of luck JohnA


Member: Melissa B.
Location: Canada
Date: November 21, 2002
Time: 11:33 PM

Comments

HAPPY THIRTY DAYS OF SOBRIETY, LONNIE!!!!!! What a miracle you are, and thank you for your posts, love and light and healing and patience to you. CONGRATULATIONS!!!


Member: Robin Z.
Location: NY
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 07:41 AM

Comments

Good Morning! Robin Z. again. I cannot believe how much better I feel in the mornings since I have stopped drinking(only 10 days). Last weekend I was frightened I would have a drink-and I didnt. This weekend I am nervous but I feel better. (Karen P)Your story hit me in the gut. That is/was me.Same scenario. I would drink in the kitchen before I would join others and "organize" ways to get a drink. Well, I have to go to work. Thanks for reading Robin Z.


Member: Anne
Location: New Jersey
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 07:51 AM

Comments

Hi...I think this site is great and very supportive. I am an alcoholic, something I thought I would never be able to admit. I am trying desperately to not drink and just when I tell myself that it is finally over (drinking) I find myself slipping right back into old habits. I am rather young and so it is hard to disassociate myself from that kind of lifestyle. I know I can do it though especially with support from wonderful people like you all.


Member: Debbie
Location: PA
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 08:54 AM

Comments

Good Morning! How can I get a "Big Book" and what is it?


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 09:20 AM

Comments

Hi Debbie. The big book on line. http://www.recovery.org/aa/bigbook/ww/ or another site I like http://www.sober.org/ Keep comming back.JohnA


Member: JohnA
Location: Manchester (UK)
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 09:22 AM

Comments

Hi Debbie. The big book on line. http://www.recovery.org/aa/bigbook/ww/ or another site I like http://www.sober.org/ Keep comming back.JohnA


Member: Bill P.
Location: Michigan
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 09:27 AM

Comments

Lonnie - Congrats on 30 days!!!! Those first 30 days are quite a ride, but you did it! I'm six months sober and thanking God everyday for this fellowship we call AA. Once I fully accepted that I am alcoholic, I realized the huge resources available to me through AA and sites like this. Good job and God Bless you. I'm glad you're here and keep coming back, IT WORKS!


Member: LorraineW
Location: London
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 11:48 AM

Comments

Hi all, Lorraine here, nearly three days sober. Huge congratulations Lonnie. I can only hope that life seems clearer and not so terrifying for you now. Thank you to Lonnie and JohnA for their posts. This site is a lifesaver in view of the fact that not everyone can make a meeting everyday. We can all feel like we're still putting a hand in. One of the most beautiful things about this sight is the honesty. Something which can almost disappear from us as we are all aware. Stay strong everybody. I know we can all do it and become much better peope for it. All my support. Lorraine


Member: Chris W
Location: Calif
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 11:54 AM

Comments

Good morning, my name is Chris W and I am an alcoholic. I have been sober since 7-14-98 and am having alot of anxiety lately. I don't feel like picking up a drink but find myself looking for ways to calm my nerves.


Member: angie m
Location: tx
Date: November 22, 2002
Time: 10:18 PM

Comments

hello my name is angie m i have been sober this time for 18 days and feel very lucky.i have been in and out of AA going on 3yrs.IT's very difficult to stay sober for me.but, i want it more than anything else.so thats why i keep coming back and back and back .one day i will get it and keep it.12 step,making meetings,getting a sponser,and beleiving in your higher power[whom i choose to call GOD].that is what i must do . i get into my own thinking .thats what my problem is. just thought someone out there might like to know this.


Member: Dman
Location: Colorado
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 03:59 AM

Comments

Interesting that the topic is using the telephone, because that is why I came online, it is almost 2:00 a.m. and I needed to talk but did not want to wake anyone. I found out yesterday that a highschool friend drank himself to death. His family was ashamed and did not even tell many of his friends, just quietly put him in the ground. Now, the news is getting out. Grief hit me very hard for several reasons. 1. He was my friend and he died at the hands of this desease. 2. It could have been me, I have been grated a remission today, but had I not followed the simple steps you all laid out for me.....it could have been me! 3. He is not the last casualty that I will witness. And the one that really hurts, 4. Was there something I could have done? With just over a year attending meetings and 5 months sober, I have more questions than I do answers. At a meeting I was told that I don't have to get all the answers in this 24 hours, just keep coming back and share what is going on with me. I can do that. Thanks for listening tonight. Peace


Member: Kathy P
Location: Mass
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 07:24 AM

Comments

Hi Chris W. Congratulations on your 3 1/2 years of sobriety. I envy it, as I am still working on my first month. I'm no expert on nerves, but years ago I had panic attacks until I got help for it. I noticed that after they went away I could still get them temporarily in high stress moments in my life, which makes me wonder if there is any unusual stress going on in your life right now that is causing your nervousness. The best solution of course is to find the cause of the stess and right it as much as you can. If that is not possible then counseling is always a good option to learn how to acquire better coping skills. Exercise is always an excellent stress beater too. Good luck and best wishes on continued sobriety.


Member: Bobbie H
Location: Hawthorne CA
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 11:30 AM

Comments

Hi Everyone, I am Bobbie an alcoholic. Someone quoted me something on page 542 about Growth in the Big Book 3rd Edition....but I have the 4th Edition. Can someone tell me what the Personal Story title was on page 542 in the 3rd Edition? I would really appreciate it!


Member: Cecilia D
Location: Chapel Hill, NC
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 12:33 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, Cecilia alcoholic here. Today, I having trouble with cravings. I called my sponsor last night and we are supposed to meet & go over 1st step things I've been working on. I guess I'm worried about Thanksgiving. I'm trying to make it without anabuse, but maybe I really need it this time. My family is a real mess. I don't want to be with them because they'll make me want to drink; and I know that I'll drink if I'm with them. I'm going to stay away and do Thanksgiving here. Oh well, I'll pray and read the Big Book to keep sober(I hope). Love to all. Cecilia


Member: LorraineW
Location: London
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 02:44 PM

Comments

Hi Lorraine here, checking on the fourth day and still sober.... feeling very stressed in my relationship at the moment. Why is it people that aren't alcoholics claim to be experts on it. They think that by just explaining everything your unhappy about is an end to the problem... if it was that easy to explain and deal with I wouldn't be in this mess in the first place. Oh God I'm sorry... wallowing in self-pity yet again. I can understand somewhat how you feel Cecilia... with Christmas just round the corner... maybe I'll spend it on my own. That way I can hide from other people's drinking and nowhere is open on Christmas Day so I can't exactly go for a binge. Anyway that's my whine for the day. Keep strong everyone. Kind wishes. Lorraine


Member: Mark A
Location: San Diego
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 03:44 PM

Comments

This is San Diego Mark again. Anyone know of good AA meetings in SD, California?


Member: Kathy P.
Location: Mass
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 03:50 PM

Comments

Hi Bobbi H. The title of the chapter is " He who loses his life." If you still can't find the quote you are looking for, write back to this site and I will write the entire quote for you.


Member: Chris H.
Location: Fla.
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 04:20 PM

Comments

I'm Chris- I'm an alcoholic/addict-To all who are afraid of meetings or just plain feel uncomfortable... PLEASE keep trying...I felt the same way but kept going because my sponsor told me to, and finally, they became s such a sorce of encouragent and help. TO those of you who are dreading Thanksgiving because of family, I am in the same boat....My dad is coming for a week, and I have been a basket case...he is so critical and unhappy. My biggest challenge is not to fall into his "trap" of trying to blame me for all of his problems and/or not trying to keep him from criticizing me by trying to be "perfect" .. Boy can it make me want to drink....I have to keep reminding myself that he will never be happy and that the reason he critizes me is that I am just the closest thing to critize. I will say that calling people is one of the best tools against this kind of thing for me...In fact, now that I think about it, I haven't called my sponsor about all this...That is probably why i am so crazy. Another thing I realized about it is that I have been " living in my head" with th is and not talking to anywone about it( I guess that would qualify under calling people). I NEED to be honest to the people that I am closest to about this...I don't want them to know because I want them to think that I am perfect and am still not sturggling with this problem. What the heck, I 'm an alcoholic...I need to do what I need to do to keep myself sober and leave what people think about me up to my HP, who I call God. That is sch a hard thing for me to do. I want to control what people think of me....because I want everyone to love me...My HP is much more able to take care of me than they are...I have not done very well with "LEt Go and Let GOd " Have A happy and Sober Thanksgiving...WE all have so very much to be thankful for...Especially the program of A.A....Thanks for letting me get this off of my chest. It really helped.


Member: Lonnie S.
Location: Forestburg
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 05:20 PM

Comments

Lonnie, recovery Alcoholic. The meeting thing is a problem for me as well. I live in rural community in TX and there are so many rednecks. The meetings that I have attended everyone swears a lot. It seems so negative. What am I not seeing? Please, help me out here? I called a lady in my group and she had me more confused after our phone call. My sponsor has not really given me any guidelines to follow. I have learned more online then anyplace else. My husband and I are having meetings on our own. Actually, I am not sure if I have a real sponsor. One lady said she would and then followed it with I don't like the word sponsor, we all sponsor each other. How can I sponsor anyone until I understand the program more fully and have many months of sobriety under my belt? Anyone with any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanksgiving and Christmas. I can totally relate. I started thinking about them several days ago and had that chatter in my head going on. I read one ladies post and she said she had conversations between people going on in her head all the time. I realized I do that as well. We think we know what other people think but do we really? Or do our attitudes create these situations? I know about the parent thing. My Mom will come to my house and say "Didn't I give you this and that?" She will even bring people I don't know over and do the same thing, pointing out all she has done for me. I basically take it as, I know you are rich and I am not. I didn't meet up to your standards. My husband and I are having Thanksgiving alone this year. I am Grateful for that. Everyone have a Sober weekend. I will. Thanks for listening


Member: Tara
Location: Austin
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 06:31 PM

Comments

Someone just wrote about all this anxiety he's feeling. What is that all about?! I'm feellig it too. About ready to jump outta my skin. All this clarity. It's early Saturday eve. The time I usually open a beer. I'm so wound up. Gonna take a shower and try to make it to an 8:00 meeting. 7 days sober for me today, right now. Lot's of self talk going on. Thanks.


Member: FC
Location: CA
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 06:43 PM

Comments

(((Mark A., San Diego))) Tons of meetings out here, Hope this helps you out, this is the schedule for san diego. You will have to type in for yourself cause I don't know how to send the entire page itself. http://www.aasandiego.org Good luck to you!!


Member: FC
Location: CA
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 06:54 PM

Comments

(((Mark A.,San Diego))) Just double click the http site, it will take you there to the web site, guess I do know how.


Member: Kjoe (DOS 7-4-88)
Location: Rochester NY
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 08:33 PM

Comments

Hello All, Yes, using the telephone is a wonderful tool to use to stay sober But, first I had to get some sober numbers. If, I wanted to stay sober I had to get some help from sober people. I started going to AA.... and found some cool people to hang with...sober...sane..people. This is why I'm still here today! I got help from recovering drunks. Who, better to get help with my drinking /druging problem then, people who have seen both sides of the street and lived to tell. So, for anyone new go to AA and find someone to talk to. That's how it worked for me..... I started going.....then, I started talking......then, hanging around....then, holy s*%t I started to stay sober. And then, the maddness stopped..... I did not continue to go to jail.....I didn't smash up my cars anymore......I didn't loose my wallet and all my cash anymore....I didn't wake up in strange places with strange people doing strange things anymore.... For years I had a blast drinking and druging but, then, it turned into a MONSTER>out of control and destorying toyko on a night basis. The good times were gone and only trouble remained. Being sober was looking mighty good at the end>>>I finally desired it. I thought somehow I would loose my coolness or become a square if I got clean&sober BUT, I have to tell ya' that I look pretty damm cool on my harley driving down the street. Something I could have never achieved if I hadn't taken some steps toward sobriety. I wish you all the best!! Keep trying!! It does happen>>>If you want it to. good luck... Kjoe331@hotmail.com


Member: Dorine
Location: Canada
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 08:54 PM

Comments

Hi, my name is Dorine, I am an alcoholic. I was feeling down. Said a prayer and came upon this site. Of course...telephone. Thanks.


Member: Kjoe
Location: Rochester NY
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 09:44 PM

Comments

Ooooooop's..........................................................That would be.....MONSTER>> out of control destorying>>TOKYO on a nightly basis.........................................................................where did I put the spell check....lol.....kjoe


Member: Bobbie H.
Location: Hawthorne CA
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 11:12 PM

Comments

Thank you Kathy P. for your response! I checked the 4th Edition and it looks like they took it out. I would really appreaciate it if you could send me the quote. Thank you so much.


Member: Wendell
Location: TX
Date: November 23, 2002
Time: 11:36 PM

Comments

I blew it again last nite. Doent matter how long I go I never stop wonting to drink. I cant stop!This is the fourth time in two weeks. The AA here wont talk to me. They are sick of me and so my wife and her family wont talk to me ether. I will stop again but it wont last. Thanks for listening.


Member:
Location:
Date: November 24, 2002
Time: 02:20 AM

Comments

Hi, everybody Rick here (camel jockey and alcoholic) This is my tenth glorious day sober. What a week this has been. Went through the weeknd without a drink and not really wanting one. My blood pressure readings are dropping through the floor and so is my blood sugar. That alone is almost enough to keep me going. I am alone in the Middle East. I will get Thanksgiving off because it falls on a Thursday, but Christmas will be just another working day, as per usual. I'm halfway glad. It's funny. I have so much in common with y'all. I feel like I have come home to roost, at long last.


Member: anonymous alcoholic (DOS 12/12/90)
Location: 2689 Ridgecrest Drive
Date: November 24, 2002
Time: 06:00 AM

Comments

Using The Telephone. Boy, this reminds me of how much I HATED the telephone in early recovery. When it comes right down to it I have had some resistance about almost everything to do with recovery. So, what happened with me as far as the phone goes? Well, this guy named Andy started calling me at work. Andy was very outgoing and liked to talk about recovery. He kind of made himself my sponsor. Almost every day around 2:30pm Andy would call to touch base with me. I liked to listen to him. He had been in treatment and had studied the Big Book. He was interested in helping me. In fact, many years ago Andy helped me to take steps 4 thru 9 one Saturday in a church basement. Anyway after months of these phone calls I got to the point where I could talk on the phone. That was 11 years ago. Recently Andy went back out, not with alcohol, but with something just as sick. He is out there 'twisting' right now. I should give Andy a call today and see if I can be there for him. Kind of a 'pay back' type of thing. Thank's for letting me share.


Member: Kathy P.
Location: Mass
Date: November 24, 2002
Time: 08:05 AM

Comments

Happy Sunday morning everybody. I'm working on day 26 of sobriety now and grateful for every one. Had a "first" last night. My kids wanted to go to the mall at 8:00pm and I actually went with them and window shopped for 2 hours. For the past 10 years of my life I would have been too blitzed by 8pm to go any where, or if not blitzed, still not have had the energy to do it because of constant hangovers and having to "rest" from them. I'm beginning to think this sober life could be pretty good, lol! To Bobbi H. Hopefully this is the quote you are looking for: "For I am happy. I thought I could never be happy. A happy man is not likely to do harm to another human being. Harm is done by sick people,as I was sick, and doing dreadful harm to myself and to my loved ones. For me, A.A. is a syntheisis of all the philosophy I've ever read, all of the positive, good philosophy, all of it based on love. I have seen that there is only one law, the law of love, and there are only two sins; the first is to interfere with the growth of another human being, and the second is to interfere with one's own growth." On that note. a happy, sober day to us all, filled with personal growth.