Member: Miranda C
Location: Vermont, USA
Date: September 21, 2002
Time: 04:44 PM

Comments

For those who are unsure of how to save the page the process is the same for either Mac or PC. With the page open in your browser, (Internet Explorer or Netscape) under the File menu at the top of your screen go down to "Save As". By default it will save as a Web Archive meaning it saves all the graphics also. It will most likely save by default in your Documents folder, but take note of where it's being saved so you can find it again. The previous weeks meeting is saved in Archives on the Staying Cyber site (by date of when the meeting began, the previous Sunday) but I know that it can be difficult to find things in the Archives. If you have a Mac you can go to http://www.valley.net/~zelda/pot/savingpot.html and find directions on saving meetings with illustrations. I'm sorry that there isn't a similar page for PC or for those using AOL.


Member: Carole F.
Location: NJ
Date: September 21, 2002
Time: 10:23 PM

Comments

Just my luck...1st time here and the pages will be gone??? I am an alcoholic and trying to return after many years of no meetings. I am so very lonely. I can't find any listings for meetings in my area...real/live meetings. Any suggestions would be appreciated. I also wonder if I'm able to bookmark this site here?? Thank you for listening and I'll come back tomorrow if that's alright.


Member:
Location:
Date: September 21, 2002
Time: 10:33 PM

Comments

Welcome Carole F, Yes of course the page can be bookmarked, just add to Bookmarks or Favorites depending on your browser.


Member: concerned for the
Location: newcomers
Date: September 21, 2002
Time: 11:01 PM

Comments

Thats my gripe. Why can't the Newcomers page be a rollover page like the Coffee Pot? Is the BS that goes on there daily MORE important than the recovery thats seeked here? Why should a Newcomer have to search the Archives for what they seek and need when they post here, then its wiped out and they wonder if anyone even read thier cry for help. Thats like having a f2f meeting and then moving it somewhere new each week. Selfish and self centered. At least who ever does the archives, can't you post a link to click on that will bring up the entire previous week? Not the damned entire archives either. I know, for me, at a few days sober I would be lucky if I was able to find this damn site again, forget having to dig through the archives.


Member: Patricia H.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 21, 2002
Time: 11:20 PM

Comments

((Bobby A)) Thank you for your input. I just left the "coffee pot" where someone advised me figure out how much money I spent on liquor a week and find something else to do with it. I'm looking at a wonderful full body message - can't wait. LOVE TO YOU ALL AND CONGRATULATIONS FOR ANOTHER DAY SOBER. 6 DAYS! Patricia H.


Member: concerned for the
Location: newcomers
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 12:49 AM

Comments

Countdown to dumping...


Member: Tech
Location:
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 09:11 AM

Comments

There is now a link up at the top to view Last Weeks meeting.... When the Steering Committee set up the Early Sobriety meeting, it was felt that the meetings tend to stay focused while the Coffeepot is more free form, and so Early Sobriety was set up as a meeting in the meeting format. If you like the CP format, any of these topics may certainly be discussed there. If you'd like a Newcomer's Coffeepot, pls email a Steering Committee member.


Member: Miranda C
Location: Vermont, USA
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 09:58 AM

Comments

Hi Carole F, these links might be of use. Have you tried calling the local phone number of AA and asking them there? AA should be listed in your phone book. http://www.eleventhstep.com/mtglist.htm Meetings in Southern New Jersey http://www.nnjaa.org/ Northern New Jersey links.


Member: concerned for the
Location: newcomers
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 10:39 AM

Comments

Thank You!!!!


Member: Carole
Location: NJ
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 12:49 PM

Comments

Thank you Miranda for your helpful link...and also to the tech for showing me how to review the Last Weeks Meetings. This online-AA is all so new to me. Can I come in here more than once/day tho?? I had thought there would be some topic meetings here on recovery. Maybe I'm in the wrong place. Thank you for your patience with me.


Member: Miranda C
Location: Vermont, USA
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 01:21 PM

Comments

Carole, if you click on the link at the top left: Guidelines, it'll answer most of your questions about the site.


Member: Rhonda G
Location: Iowa
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 02:32 PM

Comments

Hey everyone. Rhonda here. Today is 4 weeks or 28 days for me. I have learned in the past two weeks that I must look at things in an easier way. Try to simplify things. Now that I have been trying to do that things are going a lot smoother for me. I still have intense cravings but I get through them a lot smoother and quicker than I was. Congrats to everyone on another 24 hours. Have a wonderful day.


Member: Kathy D
Location: AM, OH
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 03:25 PM

Comments

Hi I am Kathy and I am an alcoholic. Not a new comer to sobriety but the first time on this website. Rhonda have you heard of a book called Living Sober? It is a paperbook with a yellow cover and you should be able to buy it at your nearst Club House. (If you can't afford it ask the chairperson at a meeting and I'll bet they will get you one) Anyway.. it has suggestions like eat candy for those sweet cravings!! My drug of choice was sloe gin so when I quit drinking I had a real sugar craving!!


Member: Bobby A.
Location: Texas
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 05:55 PM

Comments

Im Bobby Im an alcoholic.Easy does it is a good thing for me to contemplate on a daily basis.I used to think of myself as a laid back good ol boy while unbeknownst to me under the surface I was seething cauldron.I am alot more tense than I let on to myself and anybody else.So I am learning to set realistic goals for my self, work my program and not anyone elses because Im not really in control.It all comes down to the srenity prayer.Thanks


Member: Laurie
Location: Wonderful Canada
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 06:45 PM

Comments

Easy does it. Everytime something comes up that causes me stress and my first thought is going for that drink, I think Easy does it and think it through. The main question I ask myself is if I think that a drink will fix the problem or enhance it even more. I try not to have too many stressors in my life, but having two pre-teens who are involved in a variety of activities takes that option away sometimes. I try not to jump to conclusions, try to take a step back and chill out for a couple of minutes before tackling a problem. Once I do that it doesn't seem as big. All any of us can do at this stage of the game is to Take it Easy and turn the problems over to a high power who can help make everthing a little more managable. Day 22 of freedom!


Member: Pat H.
Location: Labrador Straits, Labrador, Canada
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 06:56 PM

Comments

To Carole F. A couple of suggestions as to sites to visit. The main text of AA is referred to as the Big Book. It is online at http://www.recovery.org/aa/bigbook/ww/index.html You might want to consider starting to look at getting a sponsor, preceded by lots of prayer & meditation. Some other member who can help you through the 12 steps, the key to recovery. I learned the hard way that just because one is sober does not mean that one is well!!!. I know what you are going through. I am in a place where there are no meetings, & after 15 or so years of sobriety, I went out there. In my case, I found out that there were no meetings anywhere near where I was & I was slipping & sliding. I, through the grace of God, I started a meetings in a neighboring community in Quebec & found a sponsor online (again preceded by prayer & meditation). Is it easy? No it is not!!! In my case I live in the North away from my family. I get to see them on long-weekends, Christmas, Easter & when I take summer holidays & that's it. The question is this,. Is it a reason to drink? The answer is no. There is never a good enough reason for Pat to drink. I would also strongly suggest that you consider making a habit of reading from the promises of the Big Book until the end of the chapter every morning and night in the Big Book. A good way to start & finish your day. I will help keep yo on track. For our sake, I will copy it for you: If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. The Promises Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code. And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone, even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. "How can I best serve Thee, Thy will (not mine) be done." These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will. Much has already been said about receiving strength, inspiration, and direction from Him who has all knowledge and power. If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action. Step Eleven suggests prayer and meditation. We shouldn't be shy on this matter of prayer. Better men than we are using it constantly. It works, if we have the proper attitude and work at it. It would be easy to be vague about this matter. Yet, we believe we can make some definite and valuable suggestions. When we retire at night, we constructively review our day. Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid? Do we owe an apology? Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once? Were we kind and loving toward all? What could we have done better? Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time? Or were we thinking of what we could do for others, of what we could pack into the stream of life? But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others. After making our review we ask God's forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken. On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought- life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives. In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it. We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn't work. You can easily see why. If circumstances warrant, we ask our wives or friends to join us in morning meditation. If we belong to a religious denomination which requires a definite morning devotion, we attend to that also. If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the principles we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. Suggestions about these may be obtained from one's priest, minister, or rabbi. Be quick to see where religious people are right. Make use of what they offer. As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day "Thy will be done." We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. It works - it really does. We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined. But this is not all. There is action and more action. "Faith without works is dead." The next chapter is entirely devoted to Step Twelve. God Bless.


Member: Beth H.
Location: Canada
Date: September 22, 2002
Time: 09:37 PM

Comments

Hi all! I'm really needing encouragement, support, motivation... Please reach out that hand - billthehen@yahoo.co.uk


Member: Debbie O.
Location: CA.
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 12:19 AM

Comments

Hello Everyone! My name is Debbie and I am an alcoholic. I am one week old in my recovery...whew, brand new baby. It has been tough at moments, but I just keep looking to my higher power. It isn't just one day at a time, sometimes it is one minute at a time. I know I have along road a head, I must stay focused on the 12 steps, and Great Groups like you folks. Thanks for being here!


Member: Marsha L.
Location: Guam
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 02:30 AM

Comments

I have been sober 36 days now, with only a few small crutches along the way. "Easy Does It" is an eloquent way to pave the road to freedom. Without easiness, there is only loneliness, and God willing, a way to feed back your emotions. Does drinking take the place of all those 'matters' we have learned to make due with? Some would say so. Others will play on the emotions running through their brains, with only a simple test to make matters better. Elongate your feelings of freedom; pretense will get you no where.


Member: Cec H
Location: Cowtown
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 05:31 AM

Comments

Hi all Cec H alkie here. I donn't know when easy does it started to make sense to me. Must have been somewhere around my first six months after my last slip. Two gentlmen, one of whom was my sponser and A guy from my home group @ the time pointed out to me that I didn't get this sick overnight and I wasn't going to get well overnight either. And right now, right this second,what could I change.and if I couldn't change it donn't worry about it and take it easy. But if I could then do it. And that's what I've been doing. Slowly changing the things I can, learning how to become a better me. So Easy Does It( but do it).


Member: V.
Location: Midwest
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 08:56 AM

Comments

V. here, sober 5 months plus. I used to spend a lot of time, money, energy, etc., plotting ang planning, concealing and deceiving to get alcohol into my body. Now I try to use all those resources in my quest for sobriety one day at a time. So far so good. Yes it takes effort and each day my HP gives me the strength to make it another day. So far. I know I have to keep up the hard work and really stick with the program and keep it all with me and not drop the ball or all will be lost. That "Living Sober" helped me figure out how to switch from working at drinking to working at sobriety and living with it. It helped me make some decisions about the next best thing. Keep coming back. It works if you work it. Thanks.


Member: Jack H.
Location: Orlando area
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 09:40 AM

Comments

Hi everyone, My name is Jack and I'll always be an alcoholic. In AA's preamble it says that "our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety". That is why I am here. By the grace of God and the fellowship of AA, I have not needed a drink since 4/13/80. A big part of my program of sobriety is passing along the wonderful gift I received that night. I especially enjoy newcomer meetings because I need them to remind me what life used to be like before I became willing to listen and learn. If someone has a question about how this old EX-drunk stays sober, you can email me at jackh@netpass.com. I check it twice a day. God bless and keep coming back. Jack


Member: Carol B.
Location: Ft. Worth, TX
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 10:17 AM

Comments

to pat h...... Thank you for your words of encourgment..god knows I need it. I'm struggling on a daily basis to stay sober..and many days I don't make it..but god knows the want is there. After 16 years of being sober I relapsed last year. How very insedouis this disease is. How foolish we alcholics are in our thinking that we can do it all by ourselves. After being out there for the last 15 months this is my first step towards a new recovery. I've been struggling with the shame of my relapse. In the last few weeks I've been mourning the loss of my son to a partner who doesn't care about the love I have for this child. How do people cope with this kind of loss?? In spite of the bad there are so many positive things in my life that only god can be responsible for, that I now have to make wiser "choices" then I have been making. I have the tools...and the knowledge of how to use them it's now the time to put them to work. I thanked the people of AA before..it's now time to come in from the cold to the warmth of poeple with the understanding of my struggle. So here we go again..."Easy Does It" Thank you.


Member: Craig L (Dogmanor@yahoo.com)
Location: Aloha, Oregon
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 10:32 AM

Comments

I love newcomers, you are braver than you think and the life blood of our recovery. I check this site daily to hear how you are doing. When I was new, I wanted it all now. I was hard on others and myself. I thought I knew what was best for everyone. If only this or that were different, then everything would be wonderful. Of course this attitude got me back into a detox unit. When I came back, I found I no longer had the energy to struggle so much. I am amazed how my life has changed. Some years later, I still have fears and anxiety at times, but the steps help me keep things in perspective. No matter how overwhelming things seem, I no longer have to face it alone. "Easy Does It".


Member: Pat H.
Location: Labrador Straits, Canada
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 11:28 AM

Comments

To Carol B. My thoughts & prayers go out to you during your difficult times. I have been there. Almost 15 years of sobriety & I went out there too. To be honest though, in my case, I found out that I didn't have a program in the first place. My sobriety was based on "Don't Drink & go to meetings." Dealing with life's curves are not easy for as an alcoholic. I always have to looks at issues such as my reaction to it. AS it talks about in the BB, as part of a daily inventory, did I exhibit: a) selfishness, b) dishonesty, c) resentment and d) fear. I am certainly not out of the woods yet, but thanks to the Grace of God, who found me a sponsor who is working the program, I am nearing completion a 5th, my first one. No wonder I ended up drinking. I had over 500 resentments. Sure I was getting lots of meetings, but my sobriety was not based on the 12 steps. In short, my sobriety was not based on a solid foundation. Anyway, keep trying. Don't quit trying to quit. If the willingness is there, continuous sobriety will happen. You might want to ask God to give you the willingness to stay sober & to do whatever is necessary every day, one day at a time. That may be a great start. God Bless.


Member: AZbill
Location: Sierra Vista, Arizona
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 06:58 PM

Comments

HI Carol F from N.J. There is an online, formerly chaired AA meeting with topics at www.winnerscirclemeeting.com This is a registered meeting in NY at the General Servic Offic (GSO) and the Online Intergroup of AA (OIAA). It meets every evening at 9:30 pm eastern. Welcome. What Easy Does It means to me is to move at your own pace, but move. We used to say Easy Does It, but do it. I hear a lot of people tell others they are not ready for the steps. That is not true. This program teaches us how to live sober. It will not get us drunk. I have found that the moment one walks through the doors of AA, they are ready to start. An alcohohic with few execptions clinically detoxes in 3 to 5 days. Sometimes a bit sooner sometime a few days longer. What clinically detoxed means is that the physical compulsion has left. In AA we work on the mental craving. We try to produce a pyschic change. A change in the way we think about alcohol. Once we are freed from the physical craving, we are ready for the Steps. Find someone who has shown some success in staying sober and ask them to work together with you. Remember that we meet as equals,just as our founders did. I have found some success in explaining to the newcomer in the begining, what each step is about. What they mean and what they will accomplish. This gives the newcomer sort of a road map of this wonderful journey we are to embark on. A goal, some direction in which to move. Then we go back together and work each step as we should. I never tell anyone how to work the steps, I show them how. I work the steps alongside of my sponsees. Thanks for being a part of my sobriety today. Take it easy but do it. :) Bill az-bill@mindspring.com


Member: Jo
Location: Oklahoma
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 08:30 PM

Comments

Jo here....2 weeks! Yahoo!! These past two weeks really have been easy, full of gratitude...but getting here wasn't easy.


Member: Karen P.
Location: Atlanta, GA
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 09:19 PM

Comments

Hello. I'm Karen, alcoholic. I just got online at my home away from home (I work out of town). I just picked up a chip for six months sober at my home group, but not getting to f2f meetings often enough. Also stuck in my program. Can't seem to motivate myself to do the fourth step. Part of my problem is I haven't fully done the second and third, I think. I get caught up in the higher power issue, decide AA will have to do, but my sponsor says that if that's the case my form of prayer must be sharing in meetings. I am extremely shy in groups and having a hard time with that. Can never think of what to say, and if I do, don't get up the nerve to say it. I'm saying this here to try to get up the nerve to speak up at a meeting tomorrow night. Please have good thoughts for my doing that. I could use the support. Thanks.


Member: Patricia H.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 09:30 PM

Comments

Hey ((EVERYONE)) - I haven't been here in a few days - and right now, I am too tired to read the postings - just wanted to check in and congratulate everyone for another day sober. This is my 8th day - didn't even think about the one week reward - too busy lately helping my sister move. Hope you all are doing well - I'm feeling GREAT!! Maybe I'll have some time to read postings tommorrow. Love to all, Patricia H.


Member: Patricia H.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 09:49 PM

Comments

Hey ((EVERYONE)) - I haven't been here in a few days - and right now, I am too tired to read the postings - just wanted to check in and congratulate everyone for another day sober. I had my 1st f2f meeting tonight, and although it was very uncomfortable at first - I feel better having experienced it! This is my 8th day - didn't even think about the one week reward - too busy lately helping my sister move. Hope you all are doing well - I'm feeling GREAT!! Maybe I'll have some time to read postings tommorrow. Love to all, Patricia H.


Member: Joe P.
Location: Chicago
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 10:54 PM

Comments

My sponsor and home groups are not big on slogans like easy does it, and I am not good at taking it easy. I really liked what Bill from AZ had to say above. To me, “Easy Does It” in early sobriety meant focusing primarily on staying sober one day at a time, taking the Twelve Steps under my sponsors guidance, only doing other things that I really needed to do, and not making any extreme changes unless called for by the step I was on. The psychic change Bill refers to occurs as the result of the Twelve Steps, so the steps require attention and effort. “Easy does it” with other things. “Easy does it” does NOT mean to quit our jobs and ignore our families if we have them. Keep at it just one day at a time, it’s really great to see so many here wanting to live sober for today. Thank you for being here for us, too. If you have not done so yet, please consider making face-to-face (f2f) meetings if at all possible. I wouldn’t be here today if it weren’t for the help I received in f2f meetings. Joe joep041699@mindspring.com


Member: FC
Location: CA
Date: September 23, 2002
Time: 11:04 PM

Comments

Hey there all!!! Good topic, I just have to tell myself that, when I go to a Meeting. ((MARIE)) saw your post on the CP. Yeh, I went drunk, that was the only way I could find to go in! Did anyone know I was drunk, maybe, but nothing was said to me. I went and don't remember nothing about the meeting. A lot of good it did to myself. I did wake up to see a bunch of phone numbers, to who I don't know. I am very good at what i do drinking. I can walk and talk and you can't even tell if I'm drunk or not! I know the game all too well, But, I don't recommend anyone doing this, cause i felt like shit the next morning. I'm just fooling myself right now, how is anyone going to help me if I can't even be Honest with myself. Easy does it, says to me. I actually have to think before I react!! I guess I will have to try again "Honestly". And go sober to a different meeting, cause I'm so embarresed right now!!! I don't know if I have the gulls to go to another one!!! peace out


Member: Kim D.
Location: Bridgewater
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 10:14 AM

Comments

((FC)) Hey - you went to a meeting drunk... you aren't the first and you won't be the last. What better place for an alkie to go, but to an AA meeting!!!! Those numbers you have are from people WHO CARE and want to be of help to you in your sobriety journey. If they didn't want to help or where repulsed by your drunkenness, then you wouldn't have those numbers there, would you? Please, DON'T QUIT QUITTING and don't give up on AA because of this... those people who gave you their #'s CARE... have probably been where you are now... and want to help. You're worth it ~ congrats on going to that meeting, drunk or not. Please keep coming back and trying those f2f meetings. Your reward will be far beyond anything you can imagine today. Best of luck.


Member: Kim D.
Location: Bridgewater
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 10:14 AM

Comments

((FC)) Hey - you went to a meeting drunk... you aren't the first and you won't be the last. What better place for an alkie to go, but to an AA meeting!!!! Those numbers you have are from people WHO CARE and want to be of help to you in your sobriety journey. If they didn't want to help or where repulsed by your drunkenness, then you wouldn't have those numbers there, would you? Please, DON'T QUIT QUITTING and don't give up on AA because of this... those people who gave you their #'s CARE... have probably been where you are now... and want to help. You're worth it ~ congrats on going to that meeting, drunk or not. Please keep coming back and trying those f2f meetings. Your reward will be far beyond anything you can imagine today. Best of luck.


Member:
Location:
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 10:14 AM

Comments

Test


Member: Bill P.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 10:29 AM

Comments

To FC - AA is here to help other alcoholics, and you never have to feel embarrassed about a mistake you have made. We all know what that's like. I always have viewed the meetings as the one safe haven where I can express my feelings without fear of judgement by others. WE support each other and it's okay to make mistakes. The important thing (and I see it in your response) is that you are being honest with yourself and taking steps to deal with the problem. That's what counts! Thanks for sharing and keep coming back, it work's. Peace.


Member: xx
Location:
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 11:08 AM

Comments

xx


Member: Marie
Location: ca
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 11:22 AM

Comments

FC - At least you went!!!!!!!! I'm serious when I say congrats to you!!! Embarrassment is a commen thread to ALL drinkers - have embarrassed my self SOOOOOOOOO many times I cringe when I think about it - my friend in Md goes to meetings there and says in her opinion most newcomers come drunk the first time. I know that feeling well of looking at something you've written down and have no recollection of what it was - thats the worst feeling BUT bottom line is, you went - try again (and again and again if you have to) I'm still a big ole weenie.!!!!!!!!!!


Member: Mark W.
Location: St. Louis
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 01:03 PM

Comments

To those who are avoiding things, like face to face meeitngs, and the fourth step. Alcoholics often avoided anything that was unpleasant by getting drunk. I speak from experience here. I spent a lot of time drunk because of avoiding so many things. A sponsee recently did yet another third step, with me. He has been "around" AA for years. He is always welcomed back. He has had several sponsors that I know, and some I do not. He has always had this problem that he calls AFTER he has gotten rotten drunk. This time, I tired a different tack with my friend. We did the third step prayer on our knees during the smoke break at a local meeting on Monday. (Primarily for me to know he was committed this time.) On the way home, I told him to call me Sunday morning when he woke up, so that we could meet that day to do his fifth step. Well, he called Friday night, but I was not home. He called again Saturday, to tell me he could not figure out how to do this step. I told him to get his paper, and make the headings just as in the big book. We could then proceed to get him started. Well, he did, then said but I don't know what to write. My reply was that I already knew of a couple of his resentments from previous conversations. We could start with them. We talked them out, and he had a start. The next day, we met and he had a number of them written out, and we had a long discussion, just as one would expect. While this was NOT the most thorough fifth I have ever done with anyone, it IS the FIRST HE has EVER done. He has been "trying" AA for years. Now he is IN AA. The point? Don't "try" AA for years as he has done, just do it! You won't be sorry, I personally promise you that. Note that my email address is always at the end, so you can flame me if I made a false promise. Mark W. LMW007@aol.com


Member: Carole F.
Location: NJ
Date: September 24, 2002
Time: 08:08 PM

Comments

Thank you Pat H. from Canada....your words were more than inspiring. My daughter is gravely ill in the hospital...so have not been online or in touch in the past few days. How wonderful tho to click on here and read all "your" wonderful words. I'm not ok...but trying my hardest. Everything happens atonce for me...makes it so hard to keep it together. Just being able to come in here and read all your comments has helped me immensly. Back to the hospital now. Thank you all again for sharing. I really hope you all know how much it does help.


Member: FC
Location: CA
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 01:01 AM

Comments

Hey to all!!!! Thanks for the feedback, I feel good about myself again a little, Just not a dork feeling sorry for myself! WHAAA, WHAAA!!I probably have sooooooo many questions I can bore you to death, But, I won't. Just two, "Procrasticnation", I know what I have to do, But, Its always tomorrow! What the hell is wrong with me, just new excuses!!! Second, how to you get thru the emotional roll-coater ride of emotions trying to stay sober????? I'm happy one day, angery the next and so on. Maybe if someone can tell me, I wouldn't think I'm going thru a melt down. Can't seem to be sober right now with all these emotions!!! ((((Marie))) you and I both know, we have no other choice, but, to get to a AA meeting sober. Your not a weenie, just scared!!! So am I. Thats why I have so many questions, Its not gonna help us any if we do not get to f2f meeting. Yeh, I'm trembling as we speak. But, is our choice to Live or Die??? The more I put this off the more I die inside. Anyways, Blah, Blah, Blah. I know I am not hopeless yet are you?? Lets get off our little ego trip and go. Are you game??? Thanks to anyone listening. For anyone being sober one day or trying congrats to you. You haven't quit the hope and I actually question mine. Love ya'll be safe and have a good night!


Member: Buddy S.
Location: near New Orleans
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 02:01 AM

Comments

Buddy, an alcoholic. Just checking in. Have been getting the house ready for the storm which will be here tommorrow night. Trying to approach situation as calmly as possible. The roads are wild with people heading for higher ground. We will ride it out unless it intensifies significantly by 10:00am. Just trying to "take it easy". For now, the weather gurus are calling it a "minimal hurricane". More will be revealed...


Member: Beth H.
Location: Big Arrow
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 07:31 AM

Comments

(((FC))) Those wild emotions you're having? That's how normal people feel all the time! Isn't it cool? I got so used to feeling completely numb (on purpose, because I was drinking), that the first fully sober day that I walked my son to school, beautiful sunshine, birds tweeting, no hangover, I got teary-eyed from the rush of happiness I felt. I thought "Maybe I'm manic-depressive, I'm too happy". Someone at my first f2f meeting pointed out how crazy we alcoholics are. Someone he knew, after getting sober, got really excited about taking his kids to the park. "Normal" people do that all the time and think it's a chore. Savour those feelings - happy, sad, angry , even embarassed - THEY'RE REAL! THEY'RE GOOD FOR YOU! If you try to put a lid on them, they'll bubble over and kaboom! As for me, the past month and a half I've been keeping a handwritten journal of my struggles to become sober and healthy. A pattern is emerging: five days sober, then Friday and Saturday drunk, then start again. And I'm noticing that my HP is speaking to me through my 4-year-old. In the middle of those sober patches, I'll be putting him to bed and he kisses me and says "Mommy, this was the bestest day ever". On Sunday mornings, when I'm hungover and cranky, he says "Mommy, I wish I was a grownup so I could yell back at you". Breaks my heart. (((Buddy S.))) I'll be watching the weather network and praying for you. And to (((everyone))), your posts have helped me through another 24 hours. Thank-you! Love to all.


Member: Bill P.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 09:19 AM

Comments

FC-Thanks for checking back. You sound good. The biggest thing I've learned in this fellowship is that the world doesn't really change, but I can change myself. It's when I am willing to do this that the world all of a sudden seems so much better. Keep coming back. It really does work! Peace.


Member: Holly S.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 10:01 AM

Comments

Day one...again. Good Morning, my name is Holly and I'm an alcoholic. I went to rehab last March and managed to stay sober one month...had a huge fight with my significant other and drank...and drove...now, I've been to both jails and institutions...we all know the final one...death. I'm am depressed...that self-loathing that follows active drinking when you know that your serenity lies in the abstinence from alcohol. I am frightened of my bottom. Have I already hit it or is the train headed in my direction dead-on to slam me with more tragedy. I need this fellowship....I need friends in the program...I need to stay away from wet places and wet faces, yet the need to numb my feelings runs even more powerful. How do I stop this hellish cycle? I know in my head what to do, but somehow, I think I'm missing out if I'm not partaking in the social aspects of drinking. I'm very frightened of being alone and losing everything I have. I've come close because of my irresponsibility when I drink. I have no malice intentions, however, when I drink, it becomes my priority, not the good friend I was supposed to meet, nor getting to work the next day...etc...this is very very hard. Thank you for listening...I'm hoping that I can report that I'm sober tomorrow for Day 2. I'm not sure that this will be feasible though. I can give you the next few moments.


Member: Bill P.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 10:40 AM

Comments

Holly - You need to get to a meeting as soon as possible. If you have phone numbers, call someone. I've been sober 4 1/2 months and at times I've had tremendous urges to drink. When this happens, I immediately think about what will ultimately happen if I have that first drink. You're right, once I start drinking, everything else plays second fiddle to MY NEEDS, more booze. More booze equals more pain, and more potential damage being done. I don't want to go there anymore, and I don't think you do either. Keep coming back, and get to a F2F meeting if you can. Talking with other alcoholics always helps me a bunch. We AA's can understand what you are feeling. Peace.


Member: Curtis L
Location: Goliad, Texas
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 12:21 PM

Comments

I'm an alcoholic named Curtis. I put alcoholic in front of my name because I can change my name, but I can't change the fact that I'm an alcoholic. BB p. 30, "We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic EVER recovers control." ((Holly S)) Your post has prompted me to post here. I really relate. I spent 25 years attempting to control my drinking and lost the battle. Your post said that you 'needed' the things in AA. The program is for people who want it rather than people that need it. I 'needed' it for 25 years but I hadn't hurt enough yet. It sounds like you know the results of drinking. For me it would be a suicidal act. I may get sober again, but I may not. You decide when you're at your bottom or alcohol will decide for you and it may be death or a wet brain. I stayed drunk; we got sober. I need and want sobriety, so I do what the program tells me to do. Don't drink. Get a Big Book and sponsor. Don't drink. Go to meetings. Don't drink. Work the steps. Don't drink. Find a Higher Power. Don't drink. If your ass falls off; Don't drink. Get the idea. I thought I was a pretty intelligent guy and something as simple as "not drinking" wouldn't be my solution. BUT, initially I was wrong because in not drinking and doing the above, I found a God of my understanding, and a solution to living without alcohol. If you want to stop drinking, we can help you. Love and Hugs to all in the fellowship of recovery, curtis093040@selectrec.net


Member: Jackie R.
Location: Fl
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 01:51 PM

Comments

Hi Everyone! I just spent the last 30 minutes reading all the posts on this site. I was left feeling less lonely than when I began & I am slowly remembering that I am not the only person in AA to relapse. I've been drinking on a daily basis for 14 months, after being sober 5 years. I also had a period of 8 years prior to previous relapse. My biggest problem today is that no matter how many promises I make to myself to go to a meeting-I start to drink again & never get out. Part of the issue of AA for me is alot of feelings of shame & hopelessness that I'm back in a relapse. I have much to be grateful for in my life still & so much want to stop this insanity. Thanks for being there.


Member: AnneC
Location: Canada
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 02:03 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, especially MADELAINE. WHERE ARE YOU??? I hope you are alright and have read the posts to see how many people care about you. PLEASE COME BACK!! I MISS YOU, and I am sure I am not alone when I say that. PatH a fellow Canadian, all I can say is "WOW" you are amazing!!! If you are not a councellor in AA, you certainly should be, your words are inspiring. It must be very lonely up there in Labrador although your strong faith seems to be the key to your survival. Keep up the good work!!! CarolB I was so sorry to read that you had lost a child. It must be devastating and even more so when you cannot seek comfort or support from your husband. My thoughts and prayers are with you. God Bless and remember GOD is always there in your time of need. CaroleF I was also sorry to read about your daughter being gravely ill. I hope by the time you read this she will have greatly improved. I will remember you both in my prayers. BuddyS I hope the storm turns around and fizzles out at sea. I will be praying that is what will happen. Take Care and God Bless. I have been doing "controlled drinking" (I know how most of you feel about this), but it seems to be working for me. I have been sober for a month now and although I have had my moments (sometimes i'ts too easy to have that other one). I have managed to control myself and a lot of the credit is due to what I have read on this site. Thanks again to those who created and manage this site and with the new links that are now available. I will remember you all in my prayers and I am sending good thoughts to everyone.


Member: Debbie O.
Location: CA.
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 02:04 PM

Comments

HI ((All)), I am an Alcoholic named Debbie, "take it easy", not a concept I am familiar with. But thanks to the words of Cec H from Cowtown. I get it, or think I understand. "I didn't get sick overnight, and so I am not going to get well overnight either" I need to "change what I can at this time....slowly changing what I can. Learning to become a better me." I like that, thanks again Cec H. Everyone, thank you for all your good words of inspiration and experiences/knowledge. TAKE IT EASY...right on


Member: Bill P.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 03:09 PM

Comments

Curtis - You've said a lot in your posting. I thank God for this body of knowledge and hope we call AA. It's people like you who help me to begin to better understand this disease we have, ALCOHOLISM. I go to a F2F meeting at least every day, but also like to be able to check in at this site. I'm now convinced that we can do it together, I can't do it on my own. Thanks again and God Bless you.


Member: Buddy S.
Location: Waiting for Isadore
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 03:19 PM

Comments

Buddy, grateful alcohlic. Hurricane appears to have been more of a rumor than anything else...at least so far. Everything here is closed except the bars and the jails. ((Holly))Be grateful that you didn't hurt yourself or someone else. EASY DOES IT - especially when taking a personal inventory. What's done is done. Time now to do the next right thing. Find a good criminal defense lawyer who has been where you are. There are plenty of recovering alcoholics who earn their living as trial lawyers, present company included. Contact the Michigan State Bar Association for guidance. Most state bars have a substance abuse committee set up to serve drunk lawyers and talking to them might help you obtain a beneficial referral. Jump through the many hoops set out before you, cut your losses, and don't drink today. If you do drink, don't drive. Then, remember that this is not the end of the world and there is indeen life after DWI. ((All)) Keep comming back.


Member: AnnieM
Location: NY
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 03:58 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Anne, alcoholic. Congratulations to everyone who is putting some days together!! Easy Does It. That finally sunk in for me over the past few days. I'm sober 4 months, and was so desperately trying to "get" this program (the spiritual aspect, mostly) that I was spinning my wheels. I finally realized that I can't force a feeling that isn't there. I can only work my program to the best of my current ability, and I can't let it bother me when others tell me that I'll never stay sober without God. I am now taking it easier, slowing down to enjoy the journey instead of rushing to the destination, and also realizing that what works for some does not work for all.


Member:
Location:
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 04:58 PM

Comments

Anne C. in Canada - you can't be sober and still drinking. Sobriety is TOTAL abstinence from alcohol. Please be careful. If you are an alcoholic, then you have an insidious disease that tells us we don't have one and it is PROGRESSIVE. Try NOT DRINKING AT ALL for 30 days and see what happens. Can you do it?


Member: Arlene P
Location:
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 08:15 PM

Comments

Hi everyone! My name's Arlene and I'm an alcoholic trying to stay sober. I have four months, but it's so hard. It was easy in rehab and outpatient, but now that I'm back to work, I find myself struggling at times. I do see a counselor, but I feel I need more. I would be grateful for any comments.


Member: Divine
Location:
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 09:46 PM

Comments

Anne C. we don't do controlled drinking advice on this site. Marsha from Guam, what are the 'few small crutches'? Karen, your honesty will one day keep you sober whether you like it or not.


Member: Robin A
Location: Florida
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 10:23 PM

Comments

(((Holly))) Sometimes it is just one SECOND at a time. Hang in there girl and give each second the fairest shot you can. If you have access to an Intergroup office nearby (just ask at your AA meeting) a good book I would suggest-based on how it has worked for me and a few others I know, is called "Living Sober" its yellow in color and sold very cheaply (I got mine for $3.00 3.5 years ago) Remember-WE will love you until you can love yourself. Please hang in there for YOUR sake. You sound like you've really had enough this time. Love and Hugs the AA way, RobinA Alcoholic and addict of MORE... rjamato@hotmail.com


Member: Pam B
Location: Daytona Beach, FL
Date: September 25, 2002
Time: 11:14 PM

Comments

Hi, I’m Pam – an alcoholic. I began learning to apply “Easy Does It” when I began applying Step 2 into my daily life. Each day at least one thing takes place in my life that I would normally go into thinking thinking thinking what my best way to handle it or solve it or worm my way out of it is or how to get someone else to take care of it the way I want them to – whether concerning me or someone else. (& if it were really important to me that things go exactly the way I wanted them to - I'd pray "for back-up" - but remaining stressed, anxious, fearful, worried, thinking up ways maybe I should "improve" my plan - yada yada - SOOOooo exhausting!) Then when things didn't go the way I expected them to or wanted them to or needed them to . . . I'd be enraged that life is unfair, God doesn't care about me - poor me! poor me! pour me a drink! while thinking up my next plan . . . My sponsor helped me to see that Step 2 is to stop doing that thinking/planning busy busy trying to run the show myself for me & everyone else as well - & instead – ask that Power Greater than myself to show me what he (she/it) will do if I don’t run the show myself . . . & to show me what my part to do is, if I have one. I started applying this to just one thing in my life a day to try it out, test it out – see if I can believe it. Each time, the results were far superior to how I would’ve done - or attempted doing - by my will myself! Amazing! But I'd be calling my sponsor 20 times a day to report to her how upset I am over what everyone else in my household were doing - that were not the one thing a day I was applying Step 2 to. Each time she'd tell me to say the Serenity Prayer applied in this way: God Grant me the Serenity to Accept the things I cannot change . . . [other people, places, things] The Courage to change the things I can [me . . . thru relying upon my HP to show me how as I get thru the BB (Big Book) & 12 Steps with my sponsor] And the Wisdom to know the difference. I had never realized the ENERGY & how much time it was taking to be the director running the whole show for myself & everyone else! Each time I would rely on my HP (Higher Power) to take care of the problem or situation - instead of myself – I’d have energy like I never knew I have natural energy & I'd get so much more accomplished in a day that I was supposed to get done instead of always feeling so rushed, fatigued & never getting to a 1/10th of them! The more & more I began applying this to more than one thing a day – the more amazing results I kept seeing & the more consistently I maintained that high level of energy & feeling a sense of relaxed inner contentment & peace inside – even when “big deals” were going on. I began knowing I can trust in this Step – leading me toward Step 3 . . . and I could relax & "Easy Does It" with ability to put my focus on getting thru the remainder of the 12 Steps with my sponsor. (as in: “Easy Does It – But Do It” : ) – thanks for letting me share : )


Member: annie p
Location: United Kingdom
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 02:43 AM

Comments

EASY DOES IT - (but do it!) A very great friend of mine in this Fellowship always adds the bit in brackets to remind me that I cannot procrastinate for ever! My Higher Power will guide me if asked but I have to put the spade work in. When I feel that the world is closing in and I cannot possibly cope with all the demands that are being made on me I try to go down a gear. It's as if I am going down a very very steep hill and need to keep my vehicle slow. I then try to do only ONE thing at a time! As a woman and a mother and a wife and a career person I used to think I was trying to keep so many plates spinning in the air like the chinese jugglers. Now I know that I don't have to do that. I can go down a gear and take it easy....and, surprise, surprise, everything gets done and I don't feel like I have been run over by a steam-roller at the end of it all! Thanks for letting me share my Experience, Strength and Hope - it has helped me - it always does. I went to a meeting every day, sometimes twice a day, still do when the shit hits the fan. And get a copy of the little book mentioned above - "Living Sober" and read it and do what it says but.......above all else DON'T DRINK! love to all in fellowship


Member: annie p
Location: United Kingdom
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 02:45 AM

Comments

EASY DOES IT - (but do it!) A very great friend of mine in this Fellowship always adds the bit in brackets to remind me that I cannot procrastinate for ever! My Higher Power will guide me if asked but I have to put the spade work in. When I feel that the world is closing in and I cannot possibly cope with all the demands that are being made on me I try to go down a gear. It's as if I am going down a very very steep hill and need to keep my vehicle slow. I then try to do only ONE thing at a time! As a woman and a mother and a wife and a career person I used to think I was trying to keep so many plates spinning in the air like the chinese jugglers. Now I know that I don't have to do that. I can go down a gear and take it easy....and, surprise, surprise, everything gets done and I don't feel like I have been run over by a steam-roller at the end of it all! Thanks for letting me share my Experience, Strength and Hope - it has helped me - it always does. I went to a meeting every day, sometimes twice a day, still do when the shit hits the fan. And get a copy of the little book mentioned above - "Living Sober" and read it and do what it says but.......above all else DON'T DRINK! love to all in fellowship


Member: Beth H.
Location: Turtle Island
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 08:10 AM

Comments

Morning all! Woke up, sober again thank-you GOD, to a chilly, foggy day. Yuck! Thought of ((Buddy)) and felt like a right dork. Hope you're all doing okay down there. ((Annie P.)), your "hill" analogy really struck me. A therapist years ago told me that alcohol seemed to be a "slippery slope" for me, and that I needed to be careful. She was dead right. ((((Anne C.)))) Please be careful!! I really hope that you are doing well, and that maybe you aren't an alcoholic, and you're not sliding down that hill. I'll be thinking of you. Now back to me :). I did a brave thing this week and told my best friend the real extent of my alcoholism. She had ventured that I might be taking the whole AA thing too seriously. When she found out just how rock my rock bottom was, she took my hand and told me I was doing the right thing. Wednesday is usually a bad day for me - bored, tired, sober a couple days and feeling cocky. She called me last night to wish me victory in the battle. That made all the difference. So here I am, I didn't drink yesterday, and I'm not going to drink today! Thank God, thank everyone at this site, and have a beautiful day (please!). Love...


Member: Jo
Location: Oklahoma
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 10:22 AM

Comments

Jo here....17 days...17 sober, wonderful days!


Member: Mike B
Location: Calif.
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 10:58 AM

Comments

I'm not sure what to say.Had 45 days sobriety and then decided I could drink "normally". A gallon of vodka later I'm feeling real foolish, nearly lost my girlfriend and job, and I'm detoxing today. Any encouragement would be appreciated. thecottageindustrialist@yahoo.com


Member: AnneC
Location: Canada
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 11:15 AM

Comments

Thanks for the comments from "ANONYMOUS" and "DIVINE". I am really curious as to why the two most negative comments I have had so far, came from people who do not have the courage to put their real names. Why is that?? Thanks BethH for your positive comment and I hope things are going well with you in your struggle. I am glad you could confide in someone. Support is one of the keys in the many aspects of life that we are sent to deal with and alcoholism is certainly one area that we need all the support we can get. You are in my prayers. I really am still struggling with the question "AM I AN ALCOHOLIC" in the best way I can. I know you said you don't do controlled drinking on this site (Divine's comments), and I respect your opinion. My opinion is this site is for anyone who asks for help in any way. Am I wrong????


Member: Marie
Location: Ca
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 12:35 PM

Comments

Am I nuts?? Last night I was reading some of these posts and saw a new one (I think) from someone saying she doesn't drink for 5 days then starts in on the weekend (alot like what I do) - I got a phone call and was on the phone for over an hour and decided it was too late to read the post so I shut 'er down and decided to read this morning- now I am looking at posts from today and yesterday and can't find it!!! Anyone know which one I'm talking about - maybe it was on cp but I don't think so - FC -you're right on!! You sound great -still feelin' good? Divine: I might be new to this but isn't this site for everyone to share feelings and experiences? I didn't see where it said there were limitations.


Member: Mark W.
Location: St. Louis - home of the GIANT croquet wicket
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 12:44 PM

Comments

Anne C. I have responded to you before. I am unafraid of eating my words, and do leave an email address at the end of each post. There are other programs, even ones that do advocate "moderation management" of alcohol consumption. Search the web for that one, IF it still exists, as the founder is in jail after killing the people in the other car, perhaps they have a forum. Her blood alcohol content was .29% when the test was run. You have been successful to date. Perhaps you are not an alcoholic. A way to find out is available. The link: http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/index.html (This may have been truncated somewhat, due to server restrictions). At this link, there is a button labeled "Is AA for you?" Go there, and answer the questions, just for yourself. You will then know for yourself, no one else can tell you you are an alcoholic, just as they could not tell me. If I was, I would not listen or believe. If I was not, I surely would not believe. Controlled drinking IS NOT POSSIBLE for an alcoholic, and it is doing a diservice to any newcomers here to have them believe any differently. I am thankful for AA today, six and a half years after going through the doors, and seeing someone misleading newcomers does in fact get to me, even today. Mark W. LMW007@aol.com


Member: Marie
Location: ca
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 12:51 PM

Comments

I must clarify - when I said I don't drink 5 days a week then start on weekends thats only been in the last month and half since I've tried quitting - before that it was every night for the past 20 plus years.


Member: s.mann
Location:
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 01:22 PM

Comments

Hi. I am an alcoholic and struggle daily against the desire to drink. I hate drinking and fear that if I drink I will die because of it. I want to know if anone knows how to get rid of this desire - maybe i am white knucking this and need a program but i am so busy - i have 2 jobs and other responsibilities i tend to forget about everything in my life except what i'm doing at the moment - when i complete something related to work - i suddenly want a drink - any ideas and thatnk you in advance


Member: Lorraine P.
Location: Cerritos, CA
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 01:45 PM

Comments

Hi, my name is Lorraine and I'm alcoholic. I have 35 days today. I've been with AA for a liitle over a year- needless to say, I've been struggling. I do attend meetings most everyday and I do have a sponsor. I feel a little frustrated though, I would like to get going on my steps, but I keep getting thrown back to start. I already feel that I have accomplished steps 1-3. I suppose I get impatient with myself and others, that's probably why "easy does it" applies so well to me. I fall into great anxiety when I look too far into the future and I have a real bad habit of doing that. I am learning to take one thing at a time, day by day. It really does lighten the anxiety. I'm glad to have this place to share my thoughts and struggles anonymously.


Member: Miranda C
Location: Vermont, USA
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 02:23 PM

Comments

Easy Does It: For me it comes down to the Serenity Prayer "to accept the things I cannot change". I used to spend a lot of time worrying about things I can do nothing about. There are things I can change; starting with myself. I don't have to do it all at once. It's important though not to procrastinate about changing the things I can, and I thank you Mark W for your earlier post about your procrastinating sponsee, because that was something I really needed to hear. I am very good about putting things off, about putting imaginary obstacles in my own way (I can't do that until I do this and I can't do this until I do that). I need to remember that I can take things bit by bit but I do need to just sit down and begin. Anne C, AA is for anyone who has a desire to stop drinking. It's not for those who want to learn how to control their drinking. If you are not an alcoholic and can control your drinking more power to you. (It seems you spend an awful lot of mental time and effort at it though) I tried many methods of controlling mine, many worked for a while but none for long. That's because I'm an alcoholic and I know that the answer for me is not to drink at all. I think you do a disservice to folks here when you tell them that controlling one's drinking is possible for an alcoholic. It isn't. That doesn't mean I don't think you should post here,I enjoy your posts, but if you are coming here to get support in your efforts to moderate your alcohol intake I don't think you'll get much.


Member: Kim D.
Location: Bridgewater
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 03:33 PM

Comments

((Anne C.)) Hi Anne, my name is Kim and I am an alcoholic. I, like you, didn't think I was a "real" alcoholic for many years. In fact, I bounced in and out of AA for 14 years comparing all the ways I was "different" than real AA's and how this program wouldn't work for me because I wasn't as bad as the people who went to meetings. I used AA as a band aid after messing up while drinking and for the warm, loving fellowship I received in the Halls. I didn't use it to learn how to keep the drink down on a daily basis and change the person I was so that the mental compulsion to drink would be lifted. Then came that day when I WAS THE PERSON I HEARD FROM THE PODIUM - the one who had legal problems/family problems/employment problems/health problems because of my drinking and I KNEW I was an alcoholic at the age of 31. I then - STILL begrudgingly - entered into the halls of AA as "one of them" and my life has changed immensely. IMHO, you are welcome here Anne, as in any OPEN AA meeting that is not closed to Alcoholics Only. Perhaps what you read here will help you determine whether or not you are an Alcoholic. Perhaps you'll find out that you are not. The only requirement for membership in the halls of AA is the DESIRE to stop drinking - I wish you well on your journey to find out whether or not you are an alcoholic and whether or not AA is for you. It certainly is a personal decision... I might also gently state that ANON was correct in writing that sobriety doesn't mean controlled drinking - it means abstinence and that is what AA teaches.


Member: AnnieM
Location: NY
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 04:40 PM

Comments

((Anne C)) In my personal opinion, if you can not NOT drink, then there is a problem. Whether you want to label it alcoholism or problem drinking, that's up to you. But from my viewpoint, "normal" drinkers can NOT drink for an extended time without missing it. ((S.Mann)) Can you get to meetings on your lunch hour? I go to noon meetings. Even if I miss the beginning and the end. By me, there are 6 AM meetings, midnight meetings, weekend meetings. For me, face to face meetings are the key. If that is truly not possible, there are real-time AA chat meetings on the Web. Coming here is a wonderful start. Maybe something as simple as changing your routine can help you on your way -- if you come home and sit at the kitchen table, then don't do that -- "change people, places and things". Come home and take a bath. Do something different to shake up the routine. For some of us, conditioning plays a part in the thought to take that first drink. "Move a muscle; change a thought." Good luck to us all, Anne


Member: Mike B
Location: Kelseyville, Ca
Date: September 26, 2002
Time: 09:58 PM

Comments

Feeling better about myself since this morning. I'll be going to work tomorrow. I'm amazed at how I can beat myself up for a mistake (self pity??)


Member: Gage
Location: LA
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 08:33 AM

Comments

Hello to all you people and congrats on another day of sobriety, be it your first or your hundred and first -- our days are doled out to us one at a time, so that's the way we should live them. I'm Gage and I am an alcoholic. I hope that at the end of this day I can honestly say I did my best in it. Or, if I can't say that with honesty, I hope that I will at least be honest enough to assess where I went wrong, (I may have to talk to a friend for help in figuring that out.) If I can figure out where I might have gone wrong, then I hope I will be willing to right my wrongs where I'm able, and to resolve to do better next time. I hope each of you will do everything you can to let this be the best day of your life no matter what may be happening in it. But if you louse it up the way I'm given to doing from time to time, then remember this: There is only one thing any of us needs to do perfectly today and that is to not take a drink. If we can do that, then if tomorrow comes we have a chance to do better. However, if we drink, all bets are off. At least that's true for me. Take it easy -- it's lighter than you think.


Member: norki a
Location: africa
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 09:54 AM

Comments

Hi, this is my first time doing this on line meeting stuff. Been sober for 3 years, but still have sprouts every now and then with pills. Don't know what came over me today, but was longing for a meeting and to be around people like myself, who don't even know me but can relate and tell me I am not going totally crazy. Anyway, I just recently got married to a man who isn't alcoholic, and had to move to The Congo. He has businesses here, and so we will be here for another 5-6 years. (returning home to Canada every few months for a few weeks). Anyways, there are no meetings here, and it's the type of place you just don't tell people your stuff because everyone gossips. So, I am an alcoholic with nobody to talk to. My husband is kind, but thinks I have been sober 3 years and it's all in the past. He doesn't get it, and there are days I just want to die. I have everything a person could want, but I have this empty hole in me that somedays torments my soul. So, I am grateful found this site, and atleast I don't feel so isolated. Thanks


Member: AnneC
Location: Canada
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 11:08 AM

Comments

Hi everyone, especially Marie, MarkW, MirandC, KimD, AnnieM. Thank you very much for your responses. I definitely hear what you are all saying and Mark I did take the test (answered 4 with "YES"). Everyones comments were very similar and as I certainly do not want to do a dis-service to anyone(that certainly was not my intention). This will be may last post. I will check in from time to time. I am concerned about Madelaine from Texas and hopefully she will come back. Maybe one day I will find out if I am going in the right direction. I thank you all for your honesty and support. God Bless everyone, you are in my prayers every night. Take Care!


Member: AnnieM
Location: NY
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 11:21 AM

Comments

((Anne C)) Good luck to you; feel free to come back and post at any time.... Yes, where is ((Madelaine))?


Member: Yet another Anne!
Location:
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 12:17 PM

Comments

Controlled drinking. I remember controlled drinking. I guess I was pretty good at it, since no one ever suggested that I might be an alcoholic. What I think about controlled drinking now, is that anything that I have to 'control' is in fact controlling me. Alcoholism is a progressive disease, doesn't manifest the same way for everyone but the central fact is that it gets worse. I got out before "it" got too far advanced, and have been sober and comfortable for just over three years now. My alcoholism attacked my spirituality first. That doesn't show on the outside. It was a dead feeling and an inability to be in my life. Then it started to attack me mentally, but I honestly didn't realize this until I had been sober for awhile. I didn't realize how odd and self-defeating my thoughts and beliefs were. Alcoholism hadn't started to affect me physically yet. It is a very wierd, nasty disease. I think it's so misunderstood because maybe we don't recognize that as humans, we do have a spiritual aspect that can be shredded by alcoholism. And I don't know if this is true for everyone anyway, I only know what is true for me, and what other folks say is true for them at meetings I go to. In my first year of recovery, I pushed everyone out of my way in order to try and get better. Since then I have been weaving AA and spiritual principles and the steps into my life and I am not only able to cope but to enjoy my life and my family and my friends and my work. Things are much, much better. It's not a robotically happy existence, it's been painful sometimes because life is like that, but I can still be here and participate in my life the way I just wasn't able to before. The bottom line for me, is that I am better off sober than dependant on alcohol and I am better off having spiritual principles in my life than not. I've been a member of AA since the day I stopped drinking and I'm convinced that AA is only for people that want it, not for people that need it. I can't tell anyone what will work for them, I can only share what's helped me. I'm very grateful that I don't have to drink anymore.


Member: Michael D
Location: Essex UK
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 01:59 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, my first week sober and already i feel better in myself, been to untold number of meetings and shared for the first time,last night the emotional baggage that escaped was unbelievable and i didnt have a clue what i was saying or if it made any sense, for the first time i admitted to others and to myself that I was an alcoholic and i dont want to drink any more, my sponsor was with me all the time and all i can say is thanks Kevin, for everything I know there is a long way to go but i know one day at a time ill get there, my heart goes out to you all those in recovery and those who r not, to those who have just started one piece of advice that has helped me thus far, was just sit and listen, to the similarities, not the differences, it works, good luck to u all, be strong.


Member: Chris H.
Location: Fla.
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 03:41 PM

Comments

I'm Chris - I'm an alcoholic/addict...this has been a good meeting...Jackie R. --Please don't let your shame from relapsing have pqower over you. I too felt so much shame from my nearly relapsing years recently... But I, finally have gotten back into the program, and my life is SO much better!!! IT IS worth getting over those horrible fears of walkinginto that first meeting in a long time and telling your story. I was greated with nothing but love and support. ANd now things are so muc better...I am so glad that I was able to get over my shame...It is just a lie any way. We are mearly human a,d everyone makes mistakes...Easy does it... is goot for me to hear today....I certainly never did that in my old life. I think that I thought that it gave me some sort of badge of courage to be completely strung out on nerves from overdoing it. Now I TRY to get my self esteem from my Higher Power rather than my own efforts, and it is working better for me...Good Luck to all!!


Member: me
Location: here
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 04:15 PM

Comments

I dont know if Im lying to myself. I have stopped drinking but I sometimes take a Darvon when I am upset. I dont feel high from it. I cant get more when this bottle is empty. Am I still sober?


Member: Patrick L.
Location: westchester ny
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 06:35 PM

Comments

hey, i was wondering, is there any way i can talk to people in real time or what? please help


Member:
Location:
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 06:51 PM

Comments

((Patrick L)) There are many chat meetings on the web....here's a page w/a few links: http://www.aa-intergroup.org/directories/chat_english.html


Member: Carol
Location: Vermont
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 09:29 PM

Comments

Hi Everybody, I'm new to the site, but been sober now for almost 2yrs. Belong to another community which told be to check this one out. I find myself sometimes overdoing things, and have to take a step back and tell myself to slow down, I'm one person, and I can't conquer the world in one day. That tomorrow is another day, and what I can't finish today I can always work on tomorrow. I find my sobriety very rewarding. It the second chance for me. I have alot to be gratefully for and it for my higher power whom it may be. Thanks for letting me post in your page. I have enjoyed reading what you all have posted, and it got the wheels in my mind to thinking. Thanks again


Member: Karen P.
Location: Atlanta, GA
Date: September 27, 2002
Time: 09:51 PM

Comments

Hi--I'm Karen. Still an alcoholic. Went to that f2f meeting and it was so small I was forced to share. So I shared my dilemma. Feedback I got was that I am taking myself and/or the higher power issue too seriously. What do you think? I could use some input. Sharing is still scarey in f2f, but felt like I got some support there. Please respond.


Member: Miranda C
Location: Vermont, USA
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 07:11 AM

Comments

Karen P, I don't know if I'd put it like that, that you're "taking yourself and/or the higher power issue too seriously". But maybe your higher power doesn't have to be that defined. It's natural, I think, for human beings to want things to be clear and it's hard to say that you're going to turn your will over to the care of something that you're not even sure what it is. But if you understood it or him or her or whatever, well it wouldn't be much of a higher power would it? For me, when I first did the third step, because it's something I have to do over and over again, it was as simple as deciding that if I did the best I could; tried to live as honestly, as gently and as close to what I believed was my higher power's will for me was, well then I just had to trust that everything would turn out for the best. I ask my higher power every day to lead me on the right path and show me the next right thing to do and I don't have to understand exactly what that higher power is to do that. All I have to know is that there is something bigger and better than me in the universe.


Member: Paticia H.
Location: Michigan
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 09:40 AM

Comments

Congratulations to everyone another day sober! Again, I haven't been on the computer at all this week - I suffer from depression and it really hit hard this week. The good news is that I didn't reach for the bottle! I'm proud of myself for that! I hope you all are doing well!


Member: To: Me
Location: Here
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 10:06 AM

Comments

To the person who is taking the Darvon: no one can tell you if you are lying to yourself except you. My personal experience is that whenever I wonder if I'm lying to myself, I am. For me, Darvon would be like chewing my vodka. But that's me, and you are you. Good luck.


Member: Ann
Location: MA
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 02:26 PM

Comments

Ann - alcoholic. To: "ME" "Here" I believe Darvon is a pain killer that is classified as a narcotic and is also addictive. Even if it isn't making you "high" you say your using it to alter the way you feel - the same as booze. Getting and staying sober doesn't always feel good - We try to "live life on life's terms" and learning and working the 12 steps is a huge help. Hope you get rid of the Darvon. When you use medication for uses other than what it is intended for your abusing it. Alcoholics have to be very careful about what there taking and for what reason - I was told to be very honest with my doctor's about my alcoholism because I can't take things "normal" people can.


Member: Anne M
Location: NY
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 04:28 PM

Comments

((Karen P)) I, too, get caught up with the HP issue, and I've gotten comments from "this is a God program; you can't succeed until you believe in God", to the fact that I'm thinking too much -- taking it too literally. So, one thing I've learned is that I have to separate individual AA's opinions from the Program. I can hear many things in meetings that I assume I must follow, but then my sponsor reminds me that everyone has opinions. I don't have to agree with them all, they don't all have to fit me. The Program itself is supposed to be very inclusive, not exclusive. I do not know how I feel about a God. I have a problem with a Supreme Being -- one that knows all, sees all, answers prayers, etc. I am more comfortable with a view of a Universal Unconsciousness -- an energy that flows back and forth amongst all living beings. That is a power greater than me. Maybe not Higher, but Greater. What some call miracles, and others call coincidences, I can fit in to this "energy" definition -- we are all connected, things happen due to the energies we put out, etc. Maybe I'm too hung up on semantics and definitions, maybe it's all the same thing. When I shared my views at a meeting, a few people came up to me after and said that's exactly how they feel; they just call it God. When I pray, I pray in case there is a Supreme Being. Can't hurt, right? And if there isn't, then my prayers are just affirmations to myself; like mantras. "I pray for the strength to get thru this..." would be my reinforcement to myself that I can do this. Perhaps time will change my views, but I am not at a point where I can rid myself of pride, ego, and will. I feel that kept in check, they are all positive traits. Many others disagree; but I have to be comfortable; I can't try to pound a square peg in to a round hole. Yet I don't want to leave AA; there's much I love about it. The Steps to me are, in concept, a wonderful way to live a better life. Just work on myself, try to be a better person, apologize when wrong, help others. As for getting hung up on Steps 2 and 3....I'm okay with 2; 3 is a problem for me. So, my sponsor just moved me on. I'm doing my 4th (with a Hazelden booklet; not the Big Book method). Maybe 3 will come to me. But in the meantime, I didn't want to stagnate, so I am moving on. If you'd care to email me, you can reach me at a725alm@aol.com (anyone else too). Good luck, hope this helped, or at least gave you something to think about. Anne M


Member: chris h
Location: central jersey
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 05:09 PM

Comments

my name is chris i am an alcoholic! I have 72 days in sobriety. I was in detox for 10 days and then they shipped me to an in house rehab. Wow, what an experience that was but, a good one. I was definety blessed to get in the rehab and have the insurance to pay for it. I don't know if i would have lasted this long without it. For me my early sobriety has been hard. The weekends are killers for me. I'm bored thank god i got the computer hooked up on friday. Now i can talk and read about AA. I'm sharing at meetings that i want to drink and some people look at me like(what are you crazy for sharing that--Do you know where your at??) and then people that have been in the program come up to me and say Honesty is the best policy and of course keep coming. I'm going to keep going to meetings, sharing (honesty about my cravings and difficulties), talking to other AA members (in person and on the phone), now on line. What a country!!!! Thanks for letting me share. chris h


Member: FC
Location: CA
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 07:46 PM

Comments

Hey you all!!! Hope for most, your enjoying the weekend sober!!! Haven't posted for a couple of days cause I'v been an angry bear! Who said Sobriety was easy!! ((((Chris h))) don't worry, I'm right along side of you when you say the weekends are the hardest. I honestly don't know what to do with myself either! But, your going to f2f meetings and sharing. That more then what I'm doing. I am just two days sober and hating life right now, can't sleep, eat right, or know what to do with myself. Haven't went to a meeting again, since i went drunk last time. I guess I figure how am I suppose to go to a meeting, When I feel like crap myself. What possibly do I have to offer to people that are Honestly trying to help them self's and I'm questioning everthing above. Right now I have anger and resentment on me, and can't seem to shake it off. I just don't give a damn!!! But of course I would'nt be writing anything either, if I truly felt this way! My mind is drunk and confused, Where I land up is a question all by itself. Anyways, did'nt want to depress no one! Keep up the good work and don't worry about me, I'll be fine in my own little world!!! Peace out


Member: Madelaine E.
Location: South Texas
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 08:41 PM

Comments

Hello to all, but specifically to Anne C. A friend sent me your post. I guess it was his way of letting me know that someone cares about me. Thank you. I haven't been online in several days. I have been drinking every day. Not as bad as I used to, but I get high now anyway. I am ashamed that I couldn't cut it--that I couldn't stay sober past 60 days. I feel that I will never make it. I am simply trying to control it, but I know that "it" actually controls me. No doubt about it. I love the feeling. You mention other posts from other people inquiring about me. I haven't seen them, but I thank everyone who has asked about me. I grew very fond of many people I met here during the 60 days I was sober. I do care about all of you. I am so proud of each and every one of you! God bless you all. Please remember me in your prayers. I will try again, I know I will! Bless you all!


Member: Karen P.
Location: Atlanta, GA
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 09:29 PM

Comments

Anne M., thanks for your response. It was helpful. I know I need to sort this out in a way that has meaning and feels right to me, because I need a higher power. I have been feeling far too tempted to drink this weekend, and really would like to have something/someone to rely on for strength. I haven't given in, but feel I need something beyond my will to lean on. Thanks for being here.


Member: Mark W.
Location: St. Louis
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 09:31 PM

Comments

Madelaine, AA will be there if ever you try again. FC, Funny but when I get out of sorts, THAT is when I need a meeting! By all means go. I've been sober for years, and newcomers don't realize that WE need them as much as they need us! We are there to help each other, AND newcomers get and stay sober. You don't see our thoughts when a newcomer who is really struggling comes in. I am always grateful that I am no longer there, and more than willing to help those newcomers, knowing that if no one helped me, I would still be a hopeless case. I hope you go before the weekend is out. I know you won't be sorry, promise. I am wrong my share of the time, but I have never had negative feedback from a newcomer I talked into going to a meeting. I leave my email address at the end of each post, so that if I've promised something that disappoints, or soemone wants to talk, or even if they want to email to tell me I am full of it, they can. Mark W. LMW007@aol.com


Member: Karen P.
Location: Atlanta, GA
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 09:36 PM

Comments

Plain Darvon is not a narcotic, but if you are using it because you are upset (not for physical pain), then you are abusing it. Throw them away.


Member: Lessa E
Location: Chicago
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 10:31 PM

Comments

Lessa E here, most definitely an alcoholic. And relieved to have accepted it after years of denial. (((Madelaine))) the following sentence in your post really hit a chord within me: You wrote: "I couldn't cut it--that I couldn't stay sober past 60 days". And what struck me about your post was the *I* in it. *I* tried doing it on my own, too. *I* managed to stay sober for 5 and then 2 years. But I always went back to my good buddy, John Barleycorn. I SO loved that buzz that only booze brings to me. The absolute silence of the committee inside my head while that delicious warm, peaceful feeling stole over me. The almost giddiness that followed. That's the solution *I* come up with for every situation. The only problem for this drunk is that I want more of it. I want more of it and I want it every night. And my answer is I drink more. And the more I drink, the more isolated and afraid I get. And the more isolated and afraid I get, the more I drink. Oh yeah, *I* have tried controlled drinking. And been as successful at that as *I* was staying sober on my own. What a relief to finally be willing to go to any lengths. And to have come to believe and have accepted it is a *WE* program. *WE* work the steps (that's why we have sponsors). *WE* go to meetings and share our ES&H. *WE* get sober (my HP whom I know as God is in control and I try to do the next right thing.) Sure hope you are able to make it back....*I* had to hit a pretty bad low to finally be willing to go to any lengths. *WE* will welcome you with open arms. Lessa_E@hotmail.com


Member: AnneC
Location: Canada
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 10:54 PM

Comments

I know I said in my post on Fri.27th that it would be my last one, but I had to respond to you Madelaine. I am so glad to hear from you and I thank your friend for passing on the message. I am sorry that things haven't worked out the way you had hoped but as I said to you a couple of posts ago, (maybe you haven't read it). "IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, TRY, TRY, TRY AGAIN". I know you will!! You were the very first person to respond to me when I was trying to stop drinking and I really thank you, I appreciated your comments. Even if you don't feel up to posting, please read the posts and in particular the one MarkW sent to-day. People do care about you and if you feel like archiving one day, please check out how many people responded to you. I do Say my prayers every night for everyone who has this cursed disease and I will say an extra special one for you tonight. God Bless and Take Care.


Member: Corinne B.
Location: Camino, CA
Date: September 28, 2002
Time: 11:28 PM

Comments

This will likely not be on this page very long, seeing as it is a weekly turned-over page, but I wanted to share with you folks something: I've "watched" with great sadness one particlar person go through countless detoxes and treatment centers in the past few years since my return to AA in '98. Some of us alkies have real brain damage from this darned disease and show others of us here that it really can be impossible to ever stay sober. That is the sad fact of it. I'm so grateful today that that person is not me, but so sad for them all at the same time. Even sadder for their children, for their parents, for all those who keep hoping upon hope they will stay sober this time. And who knows? Maybe this time, they will. Brain damage is a hard thing to admit that really does happen to some of us as a result of the action of alcohol on our brains and bodies. Gratitude seems to me the best "thing" I can have seeing this happen to this poor child of God. Gratitude that there will always be some measure of hope in someone for them, that perserverance gets practiced for them, and that it keeps someone sober in the helping, even if it doesn't keep that someone sober. The resiliance of the Human Spirit is an awesome thing. Praise God and AA for the miracle of those who can stay sober amongst the many more of those who cannot.


Member: Jennifer K.
Location: Dallas, TX
Date: September 29, 2002
Time: 01:32 AM

Comments

Hi all. 2nd time here. Coming up on one year next month - my first first! And hopefully, my last first! "Easy Does It" isn't always easy...I ask myself one simple question when I start to feel overwhelmed - How important is it compared to my sobriety/serenity? So far, the answer has always been, not important enough. As far as God and the Program, please read and re-read if necessary the Chapter to The Agnostics. I skipped it the first time through because I've always believed in God, I was just never worthy enough for His attention and church made me feel less than. It's a great chapter and has taught me that this Program isn't about God, it's about Spirituality. The Appendix on spirituality is also good to freshen up on if you haven't read it in a while. Please remember, Bill W. was an agnostic, too. God bless you all, and here's a cup of coffee and a cigarette to another 24 sober!


Member: Gage
Location: LA
Date: September 29, 2002
Time: 01:46 AM

Comments

NORKI in Africa, if you will look on the Coffee Pot page, there is a link there for online meetings, some in real time. Hope to see you posting here some more, and visit some of the other pages here as well. You're not alone.


Member: Madelaine
Location: South Texas
Date: September 29, 2002
Time: 01:48 AM

Comments

Anne C.------What has made you decide not to post? You see to be doing so well. I love yOu! I don't know why , but you really touched me! I felt for awhile that I was doing okay but I haave to be honest and say that I was just deluding myself. I feel in my heart that you can beat this! Do it! You haaave so much going for you! God bless you, child!!!!! Write me. Just you and me Mad 2325@aol.com. I love you! Blessings, Madelaine


Member: anonymous alcoholic (DOS 12/12/90)
Location: 2689 Ridgecrest Drive
Date: September 29, 2002
Time: 08:47 AM

Comments

"Easy Does It" is a good slogan even if one ISN'T early in sobriety. I tend to complicate things and also go for perfection. What a formula for disaster. Actually it's a formula for addiction too. So, whenever I have a 'bright idea' today I better give it the test of AA: does this idea sound like I'm in recovery or still in my disease? (It might be smart to also run my 'great idea' past my sponsor just to see if he salutes it.) Thanks.


Member: AnneC
Location: Canada
Date: September 29, 2002
Time: 01:19 PM

Comments

Hi Madelaine. Welcome back, your posts were missed. I have taken note of your e-mail address and I will contact you personally. I have enjoyed this site very much and it has helped me in so many ways. However I was informed that this site was for people who wanted to stop drinking, not control it and that I was doing many people a dis-service by saying I was doing "controlled drinking". I would not do a dis-service to anyone intentionally and I do understand that I could be sending the wrong message. I personally feel that NOT drinking at all would be the perfect answer. I also feel that we have to choose what is best for us in our own unique situations and at the moment I have chosen not to drink to excess but to control my drinking. This is working for me so far and my one crutch is this site. I really enjoy reading everyone's posts, some of them are so inspirational and I will continue to check in. For someone who said they wouldn't be posting anymore I guess I have to eat my words. Thanks for your encouragement Madelaine, I will write to you. God Bless and Keep Coming Back!!!


Member: shawn c
Location: new jersey
Date: September 29, 2002
Time: 01:59 PM

Comments

hi everyone, I'm Shawn and I am an alcolholic. I am a newcomer to the recovery process and I am having a hard time.I am asking for help. I will put my address at the end if this posting. aside from being new to this I have also split with my partner of 14 years. he too is an alcoholic and was also cheating on me.I have been going to meetings as often as i can, about 5 a week.I am getting many good things from the meetings and am grateful for them. I am also overwelmed by it all. I am not doing so good with the breakup thing, he got mean and ugly towards the end. the first day that I moved I got drunk. I regret it and have not had a drink since sept. 3rd I am trying to meet new, healthy friends but it is hard cuz I don't feel like being around people, happy people, just yet. the urge to drink isn't as strong as the urge to call him, I know i won't call him because he is just bad news. so, if anyone wants to write and maybe chat that would help. I live in s. jersey near philadelphia, I am gay so if that bothers anyone thats cool, go your own way. my address is peacefrog714@yahoo.com thanks for listening, shawn