Member: Rudy F
Location: Spring Hill, Fl
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 13:11:16
It seems that many have more interest in what others character defects being presented, rather than focus on the problem--which are my character defects. Live and Let Live, Easy Does It, One Day at a time, Let go let God, How we use the slogans to achieve sobriety would be a good topic?
Member: Chris A.
Location: Ft. Myers,FL.
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 14:25:38
It sometimes is really hard to take the focus off others and put it where it belongs--on ourselves. Why shouldn't it be easier to focus on others character defects, after all they're not OUR problem. But, this is where our attention belongs--on OUR problems not others. We must first search ourselves before we can be of any assistance to others, we must first get our own houses in order. This is most often very frghtening and sometimes painful but it must be done. This sounds to me much more like a fourth step topic than a slogan topic but, if we live our lives(work our programs) and let others live their lives( work their programs ) we will all someday be able to be of service to each other . P.S. This does NOT negate the need for sponsorship, for rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path
Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 14:51:57
Larry, alcoholic
Good topic Rudy. I was hoping to discuss tolerance this week and the first part of your topic, about taking others' inventories instead of our own, certainly relates to tolerance, as does one of my favorite AA slogans, "Live and Let Live".
In one sense, I'm less tolerant than I used to be when I was drinking. I was associating with some very unpleasant people who did many unpleasant things, and that was OK with me. Stealing, lying, cheating, getting wasted on drugs and alcohol, hurting others, etc. is no longer OK with me. I try not to behave that way anymore and avoid people who do. I recently divorced my wife because I could no longer tolerate living with someone who still behaved that way.
Where I do have more tolerance is in how I feel about these people and their behavior. I spent a couple of decades behaving badly, so who am I to judge others? While I may condemn their behavior, I try not to get angry and resentful over it. I now realize that they are hurting themselves and have some sympathy and empathy for them. If I can be of some help to them, great. If not, I simply avoid them and don't spend time allowing their behavior to upset me ("living rent-free in my head" as we say).
I've had to develop a lot of tolerance towards people in the rooms. As the BB says, "we are people who normally would not mix". I try to identify, not compare, with others when they share (another good saying we have). I used to get upset at meetings when the holy-rollers would start preaching or someone would go on and on and on. Now I try to keep in mind that these people may need to say these things and that I'm helping them by listening - almost like 12 Step work - and that I undoubtedly say things that they don't particularly want to hear either. But we all need to hear what each other needs to share and then work towards the common solution that we have in AA.
So when I start judging others and getting upset with them, it's good that AA teaches the need for tolerance. Simple slogan such as "Live and Let Live" are constant reminders for me and help me maintain the serenity I've worked to attain. Then I can concentrate on why I allowed someone else to upset me (pg 449 of the BB) and return to dealing with my own character defects.
Thanks for letting me share.
Peace & Serenity
Member: Amy S
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 15:16:25
Hi all, Im an alcoholic, name is Amy. Great topic. I guess my favorite is One Day at a Time, because it was the hardest concept for me to understand. My world when drinking was a world of what if's and if only's. Then I wouldn't drink. Had no idea how to live on today and how to enjoy and accept whatever today brings. Thanks to this program & a loving HP I have learned how to live in today. I'm aslo a lover of Live & Let Live, mainly because I don't want other people to tell me how to live my life, I have no right to tell them how to live theirs. Oh my, we are truely blessed to have this program to teach us the important lessons in, life. Thanks for letting me share, and y'all have a wonderful and sober day!
Member: CandyC.
Location: Texas
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 15:53:18
hello all
Member: Sheila R
Location: S.C. IA
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 17:41:09
Hi, I'm Sheila and I'm an alcoholic. I appreciated Larry's comments today. I went to a "live" meeting last night where an individual was sharing and sharing and sharing. I was doing my best to be tolerant and remind myself that sometimes I ramble on about whatever is going on with me too! The 12th tradition helps me with this also, principles before personalities, and when I make even a slight attempt to practice this I find that I am able to sit and listen and even get something out of what that person has to say. Another thing that sometimes helps is if I can remember where I come from and how badly I needed people to listen to me when I was bouncing off the walls in my early sobriety. I have no more answers than I did when I first got here, but I've had the time without a drink to practice them and see that they do work. Thank God for AA and all the slogans that help me stick around one more day.
Member: Linda O
Location: PTB, FL
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 18:56:39
Hi! I'm Linda and I'm an alcoholic.
WOW!! We Floridians have pretty much dominated this meeting so far, haven't we? Must be the time zones!
Anyway, my favorite slogan is "This Too Shall Pass." It gives me comfort to know that when I step in my own s**t and lose my peace and serenity (or go off the deep end completely), that the mood, situation, whatever, will soon change. I can relate to change since I was so good at it as a drunk!
I, too, appreciated Larry's remarks on "Live and Let Live" but in my area it's quite a chore. I don't know if it's because my home group and all the meetings I attend are beach meetings or if it's just that my area is composed of people who really have no "roots" here. Whatever the reason, taking other people's inventories is THE favorite topic after all meetings. It's difficult to avoid, but I'm trying!!
In love and service
Member: chris l
Location: garland
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 20:13:44
Their doesn't seem to be that many people seem to be on this week. I some times feel that their are only a few other people that are actually trying. But it really doesn't reqally matter how many people want to do right as long as I want to.
Member: AnneMarie
Location: Florida
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 20:35:15
Hi {{{{{{{ Family }}}}}}}}}} I am AnneMarie a gratefull recovering alcoholic.By the grace of God and this fellowship...I just shared a few minutes ago and dont believe I formerly introduced my self.Now I have and love everyone who is here for me and sharing there words of wisdom.Our experience strength and hope. AnneMarie
Member: CHRISTINE,S
Location: ROCHESTER
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 21:04:36
HELLO, MY NAME IS CHRISTINE AND I AM A RECOVERING DRUG ADDICT AND ALOCOHOLIC. I AM HAVING A LOT OF PROBLEMS STAYING SOBER. I GUESS MY PROBLEM IS I AM DEPRESSED AND I CAN'T SEEM TO GET OUT OF THIS. IT SEEMS TO GET WORSE EVERYDAY. PEOPLE ASK ME EVERY DAY WHAT ARE YOU SO DEPRESSED ABOUT AND ALL I CAN SAY IS, LIFE.JUST BEING DEPRESSED MAKES ME ANGRY.AFTERI GET ANGRY I WANT TO USE AND I HAVE ALMOST SLIPPED A COUPLE OF TIME. I GUESS I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO TO LET GO AND LET GOD. I WOULD LIKE TO HERE ABOUT THE THIRD STEP. THANKYOU EVERY ON FOR LETTING ME VENT!!
Member: Don L.
Location: New Brunswick, Canada
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 21:29:06
I am an alcoholic, my name is Don. When I was new to the program the steps didn't mean to much to me, they were over my head so to speak. That is where the slogans came into play in my life. I would sit in the rooms looking around not paying much attention to the readings or the speakers but the slogans were on the wall and I would read them and think about them it was a great help to me then and even now many 24,s later. Christine the thrid step says the care of God not the control of God, if I belive ( which I do) that my higher power loves me and wants the best for me it is easy to let go and let God. thanks for being here you all Peace and serenity Don
Member: Tina M.
Location: PA
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 22:06:05
Hi, My name is Tina, I'm an alcoholic. And Linda O., I REALLY used to hate it when my sponsor would say "This too shall pass." But it really does. I've recently been taking my son to counseling (my husband drinks) and it seems like it isn't going anywhere. Now they want to send him to another counselor for more in-depth counseling which means new papers to fill out, etc. My husband is reluctant to pay for it & I'm not working. I am however, planning to go back to school at 37! I just wish things would move a little faster. Sometimes I resent putting everybody ahead of myself but that's how it is. Someday, my needs will come first. But my sobriety DEFINITELY comes first. And all this too, haha, shall pass!! Thank you all for being here.
Member: Mike C.
Location: OH
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 22:26:17
Hi, Mike C., alcoholic.
Pride says "I am", humility says "God is".
I latched onto that saying somewhere early on in recovery, and still keep it posted on my bulletin board. It serves to remind me that when (I) lived an (I) program (I) was drunk. The only way for me to stay sober is live a "we" program. Thanks for all the good shares so far, and for allowing me to share.
Member: tony g
Location: ma
Date: 15 Nov 1998
Time: 23:09:42
tony alcoholic,christine congratulations!!you said you almost slipped ,but you DIDN"T.why?maybe thats because you were willing to let your higher power take over.relax a little and be patiant.when you get mad,thats your will working.relax go to more meetngs,and let Gods will work,thats step 3 .stay sober its your number one priority today,read the big book,and the step book and think about what youv"e read.ask your hihger power for some help on these matters ,then be patiant.....you"ll be ok!and "keep it in the day"dont worry about tomorrow or..."One Day At A Time"
Member: Larry F.
Location: Bloomfield,NJ
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 01:09:02
Hi, my name is Larry F. and I am an alcoholic.Good topic. the slogans help me keep it real simple and take me out of the wrong place; usually my own head... Thanks for letting me share.
Member: MIKE M
Location: Bend Or.
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 02:03:20
hi my name is mike and iam a ALCOHOLIC good topic. i am bumed out a friend of mine went out she would have 2y today we were trudging buddys we stood up as newcomers together by the grace of GOD shes back i feel anger fear and helpless i cant keep anybody sober nobody can keep me sober but together WE can stay sober one day at a time everyday no'nt once aweek or every other tuesday every f$#&+* day my name is mike and I am a ALCOHOLIC
Member: Craig K. < craig4d@earthlink.net >
Location: Aridzona
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 04:13:37
Hi, Craig K. a grateful alcoholic.
The slogans sometimes pop in my head. Usually when I'm about to do something really stupid. So, they are a help. I am grateful my Higher Power sends them to all of you to pass on to me. I guess they are a way of making the message of A.A. simple enough for a bone head like me to understand and apply.
Mike M. don't be too unhappy about your friend going out. It's something you have no control over. And remember nothing happens that is not God's will. We may not know or understand the reason, but He does. So accept His wisdom and try to be forgiving. Let go and let God, you know?
I wish you all happiness, joy and freedom. Thank you for letting me share and for your words of wisdom that help me stay sober.
Member: nev s
Location: queensland aust.
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 07:06:35
hi friends,my name's nev and i'm an alcoholic ,i,m just 3mths into recovery after a 30 odd year career and doing well thanks to this wonderful fellowship and the great set of tools i've been given to rebuild my life. the saying that saves my life every day is ' one day at a time ',today i haven't had a drink and for that i'm grateful, best wishes to all ,thanks for letting me share.
Member: Rivner
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 08:42:44
Howdy, I’m an alcoholic, my name is Rivner. Ya know, I can spend so much useless time over thinking this program that the obvious escapes me. I recollect a time way back when I was whining to an old-timer about how I had to run out and get a car, get a job, get a relationship, get a ……, and he pulled me up short with: "Son, why don’t you go home and take a f****** nap and slow the Hell down! Easy Does It". It is the nature of my disease, I believe, that it will try to get me into "overthink". That’s one of the ways I can get nudged out of the recovery loop that I need to keep runnin’ in my head. Overthink misses the simple stuff. It’s like screamin’ down the road so fast I’m missin’ the flowers growing. Easy Does It lets me see the simple details. I can spend hours figurin’ on what I can do to change someone’s else’s annoying behavior and miss the obvious solution of Live and Let Live. Now I’m not sayin’ that there isn’t room for a little more expanded or analytical thinking beyond the slogans, but it sure is easier gettin’ up the ladder starting with the first rung, rather than jumpin’ from the ground up to the one half way up - d’ya think? Riv.
Member: Pat R
Location: NYC
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 08:51:00
I truly believe one can live by the slogans alone I did for years. Whenever shit came up in my life I took a step back and remembered a good slogan. I have Gloria who is now in heaven hopefully looking down on me and will always be my sponsor in life and death.
Member: Cat
Location: Marietta, Ga
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 09:54:53
I just found this site. I guess what I want to say is on the topic...Im an alcoholic, in and out since 1990.This time I have been drinking 1 1/2 years.. and I can't seem to stop.I have tried it all..even going back to meetings. I dont really know what to do, that is why I am posting this. I have tried everything else.
Member: Camo
Location: LA
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 10:15:37
I am really grateful for all those slogans. I need them. They are tiny packages that can pack quite a wallop if I let them. I need those handy "channel adjustments" for the thinking because I am one of those intelligent dumba**'s who will try to take control of more than my higher power wants me to. Every time I say I am sick of hearing one I get hit in the head with why I need to hear it more often.
Member: Kerry B. 3/21/80
Location: Idaho
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 10:34:20
I'm Kerry, and I'm an alcoholic
All of the slogans have helped me. Especially in the beginning. The one the stands out the most is "one day at a time", for that was a totally foriegn concept to me. I was always living in the past, or projecting the future. I was forever trapped with that thinking, for looking at the past brought up bitter memories, and then my head would tell me that my future was just a bitter, for having already lived through the past. The only solution for me was to "drown" my fears. I was doomed at the ripe old age of 23.
Thank God I walked through the doors of AA and into the loving arms of my fellow alcoholics. I was not condemed by my fellows, but accepted merely for the fact of my disease and suffering. I remember feeling as if I had finally found "shelter from the storm", and I have. For CHRISTINE, the only thing I can say to you is SURRENDER - not to the alcohol, but to your powerlessnes over it. It is step 1 that will keep us coming back, sober. I know, as I flipped in and out for awhile, and through all my "excuses" the only real reason I couldn't stay in the beginning was holding on to my supposed power over alcohol. I didn't have it (power), and kept proving it. You don't have to drink anymore, if you don't want to. Give it up. It doesn't work anymore.
I love you all
Member: Robert B
Location: Boise Idaho
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 10:45:52
Hi, I'm Robert, an alcoholic. To Cat, and to all newcomers, the simple statement, "I'm trying to stay sober" is always on the topic in any AA meeting. Welcome to all. When God dropped me into my first meeting, 60 days dry and terrified out of my wits, I didn't know this is about WE. but the folks in that room knew. I think you will find out the folks in this room know that too. Today I don't have to drink. You don't have to drink, just for today. WE don't have to ever drink again, One day at a time. And by all means--Keep coming back! God Bless US all. Robert
Member: Susan S.
Location: Colorado
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 11:57:52
I am a newcomer. I haven't been around long enough to know what the slogans are all about but I hope to soon. I know some people who got sober without AA and that's what I WAS trying to do because I hate to ask for help or depend on other people but those people I know are so unhappy. They think about and wish they could drink everyday even years later while those in AA seem happy and at peace. Finding this website and reading all your letters last week gave me the courage to try AA agan. I have been sober for 3 days. Susan S. Susan1998@webtv.net Send me an e-mail if you want.
Member: Mike W
Location: New Hampshire
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 12:23:49
Hi my name is Mike and I am an alcholic, To Cat and other new comers. We have a sign above the door at the Freindship Center in Derry NH, it says Don't drink, Go to meetings, Ask for help. I offer this advise to you because it saved me when I was new. Stand up at a meeting and ask for help, you will get what you need. Thanks all for letting me share. Grateful Mike
Member: Kathy F
Location: Carlisle, IA
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 13:54:11
Hi my name is Kathy and I am an alcoholic and drug addict. This topic is great. My old home group was big on taking others inventories after meetings... then one day I thought if they talk this way about them then what do they say about my... so I found a new group. When I think of the slogans of AA I remember my first meeting.... they had them all posted up all over the room and just sat there and read them... my favorite is "but for the grace of God go I" because I know that I wouldn't be around today if it weren't for Him. Just to add some things for some others... to the NEWCOMERS... I was told there are 5 things to do everyday and they'll keep you sober... 1. don't drink 2. read your big book 3. get a sponsor and call your sponsor 4. go to meetings 5. pray
MIKE... I had a couple of relapses early on in my program and with each one I learned so much about me, God, and my program. I have a totally stronger program thanks to those relapses. SHEILA... I chair a meeting at my home group and some of them can really get long winded. I always try to listen to them all because I never know when they'll say something that will help me. Welcome to the newcomers...Keep coming back.... thanks Kathy F
Member: Ken A
Location: Milwaukee
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 14:17:01
Cat and Susan, glad you're here. Susan, congratulations on 3 days. Those first ones can be tough. Cat, from your posting, I don't know if you've stopped drinking or not, but I'd guess "not". On August 17th I don't remember thinking seriously about stopping drinking, but I firmly believe God, my Higher Power, brought me to this site. I checked here and at the Coffee Pot about 30 or 40 times that first day and I passed that first night without drinking. The next day I put a picture of Bill W on my computer's desktop and changed my screen saver so it says "ODAAT". I agree with Kerry, the slogan "one day at a time" means a lot to me. For years I've had problems stopping drinking because I couldn't face going without drinking on holidays, birthdays, weekends, Tuesdays, whatever. Now, I just try to take care of today.
In any event, this place, that picture, the 12 steps and ODAAT have been key factors in my celebrating 90 genuine, honest to God sober days yesterday.
Welcome and good luck to both of you and to all newcomers. I do most of my posting over at the Coffee Pot, and I "lurk" here, but there are some really neat people in both places.
Member: Kyle F.
Location: GR, Michigan
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 15:23:12
When I walked into the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous I noticed many of their tools hanging on the walls. Tools like, Easy Does It / But Do It, One Day at a Time, Don't Quit Before the Miracle Happens, Keep It Simple, This Too Shall Pass and most importantly were the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. I didn't know how nor where these tools could best be used. I needed someone who has gone before me to lay out these tools for my inspection. I needed a sponsor. This apprenticeship began when I was 19 years old and continues to this day. In A.A. I found friends that I had not met yet (including myself). I learned ways of dealing with my feelings before they erupted out of control. Alcohol no longer was the focus of my emotions. I was shown tools that helped me avoid the emotional storms. These tools could even be used if I self powered another storm. First by allowing me to see the warning signs so earlier detection could be utilized and then by helping me clean up the wreckage before I became buried in numbness. Its destructive effects on my life and others does not seem to last as long and run so deep. Thank God for people who allow him to work through them.
Member: Franki H.
Location: So-California
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 15:37:05
Hello, My name is Franki and I am an alcoholic.
I really enjoyed all of your comments. I think there is one cliche' that I heard from a gentleman in my home group, and that is: "WE ARE ALL SUFFERING FROM A DEADLY DISEASE, AND WE TEND TO TREAT IT LIKE A COMMON COLD." This was something for me to think about. After 10 years of NOT trying to get this thing, and squirming around like a maggot in my crap, I am finally coming up on 2 years in January.
Before I really took this thing seriously, I had to HURT bad enough to WANT it. Like the lady I heard sharing earlier. Here's one for you. "YOU never have to drink or use again, ever, UNLESS YOU WANT TO."
My favorite was "Fake it until you make it", and as my sponsor says, "EITHER GOD is EVERYTHING, or HE is NOTHING."
On December 3rd, it will be the ten year anniversary of my fiance's passing. He most graciously shot himself in the head in front of me and 7 of my closest friends, after I broke up with him after 3 years of Severe physical abuse. I could blame him, and I used to- for my drinking after that time. I hid in a hole in the center of my own universe. I tried EVERYTHING I could to feel better, to feel normal. It was only when I had heard- when I was READY to hear the message of AA, that I learned to start living. I read the book, I got a sponsor, I did 90 in 90, and most important, I followed the best advice I was ever given in AA, "I TOOK THE COTTON OUT OF MY EARS, AND I PUT IT IN MY MOUTH". Since I learned, I don't know Sh*t, I have become teachable.
I could go on and on, but I won't. Thank God for AA, you may not have a chance to tomorrow.:)
Member: Debbie H.
Location: Maine
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 16:55:02
Hi, everyone, My name is Debbie H. a greatful recovering addict and alcoholic. This is my first "meeting" just got on line yesterday and found this sight, went to the coffe pot first! Anyway I really like the topic.
Reading all your posts really brought me back to my first days in the program and all the slogans which I use frequently. One of the things my sponser told me at the beginning (when I was taking everyone else's inventory) is when I'm pointing a finger at someone else, I have three coming back at me. Since then, when I find myself pointing at others, I try to look at myself and find out what it is about that other person - what they said, did - that I don't like. it really isn't them, but what was said or done. I usually find out a little more about myself when I try to reflect on it.
To CHRISTINE S - When I was depressed my sponser told me to read pg. 449 - acceptance. It was ok for me to be depressed, at least I knew what was wrong with me - I really didn't need to know WHY - just needed some time SOBER first. You didn't take that drink today - so your ok. Hang in there and keep coming back.
I remember going to a meeting once and asking to talk about tolerance, what I got was a discussion on WILLINGNESS. what I learned was I fist must be willing to accept.....
TO CAT: Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thouroughly followed our path...... go to meetings, get a sponcer, as for help, We've done this one day at a time and with the Grace of GOD and the help of AA, we will get thru this.
Thanks all for letting me share. In fellowship - catch a hug.
Member: John H.
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 16:55:50
Hi everybody! It's a good day to be sober! It's my bellybutton birthday today and I'm going out tonight with my family for a nice dinner. Simple and wonderful..... thanks to the AA program and you wonderful people who have helped me so much.I could have and probably should have lost it all....but for the grace of God. The slogan I really hung onto at first was 'You are not alone. ' Boy, did I feel alone at my first meeting but I was spotted and helped and slowly I started to come around and I just kept coming back. I try to change, to let go and let God. I humbly ask for help in the morning and give thanks at night for my sobriety. I don't feel alone now very often and when I do I know where to go. A meeting! Keep coming back! Christine, you are not alone. We understand.
Member: Margie M
Location: Rochester, N.Y.
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 16:59:51
Hi, I am Margie and I'm an alcoholic!!!Saying that at meetings keeps me reminded of who I am and what my problem is(the first step). Christine I too live in Rochester. I'm wondering if you live in Rochester N.Y. or Mn.? My home group if the Yellow House 9:30 meeting in Penfield. It meets there every day. I would invite you to look @ your meeting list and join us fore a meeting . We are so lucky in this area because we have so many meetings, every time of day. Every morning what I do is ask my higher power to give me strength to stay sober for the day. The depression happens,but, it talks about it in the big book about getting outside help. After all Bill W. was a depressed person and I think was on anti-depressants. Change the way you think- this is after all a thinking disease as well as phisical and spiritual. Good luck to you.Margie M.
Member: Karen A.
Location: Ohio
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 18:27:03
hi i'm karen I am a recovering alcoholic with almost 2 years in april. i just found this sight today I like the slogan get out of the drivers seat and put god there. almost 2 years ago I thought I would never amount to anything all i knew was to drink to relieve the pain of depression,and very low self esteem,followed by a bad marriage of ten years. I heard that in the first year of recovery it is not wise to make major changes but for me that was the only way. I left my husband,moved out of the state,got divorced then in april of 97 I got sober got a new attitude for life,soon nothing could stoop me. I soon went to school got my GED,went back for custody on my own fought for my 3 children,was granted full custody im May of 98,and started college in Aug. so I dissagree with the major changes because if I haden't made those changes I would be nowhere today I have to live minute by minute right now at this time in my life. so Cat as you can see IT WORKS IF YOU WORK IT. LET GO AND LET GOD be your driver for a while just watch and see what happens. thank for letting me share.
Member: Joe P.
Location: Chicago
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 19:53:38
Hi Family!
My name is Joe and I am blessed with the gift of addiction. I say that I am blessed because until I surrendered to this disease I would not have found my way to God.
To Cat and Christine: I, too, have had alot of trouble getting this program. I've been out there for 25 years, nearly 15 of it trying to get sober. I've only got six months now, but it seems finally to be taking root. How did that happen?
Well, for me, it happened when I finally realized that God wanted me to be happy. It's sort of a "Step Zero" for me, realizing that I am WORTH SAVING! A favorite slogan I use, which isn't really an AA slogan, but it sure helps me, is:
GOD DON'T MAKE JUNK
God truly loves each of us. He doesn't want us to be miserable. And believe me, I am no bible-thumper or pulpit-pounder. I'm a 37-year-old recovering Catholic computer programmer. The God of my youth was a terrible, vengeful God and I assumed that I was bad and going to Hell and that's what he wanted. I assumed it was all just a big game, with God as scorekeeper and the deck stacked against me.
Once I realized that God wouldn't go through all that trouble -- heck, He could have just tossed me straight into the inferno if that's what He wanted -- I began to think that maybe it wasn't His idea for me to be unhappy. Maybe, just maybe, if I just TRIED to be a LITTLE happier each day, it might work.
Well, it's been no bed of roses, I'll tell you. One other phrase I use alot is:
S.O.B.E.R.: Son of a B----, Everything's Real
Life is NOT going to be miraculously wonderful because I'm sober. But my ATTITUDE can be better, and with that, my ability to handle the stresses and the depression and the deep, dark despair that always took me back out there. And slowly, as my life changes, things DO get better, a little at a time.
Well, I'm rambling here and I don't want to hold anyone hostage [smile]. Everyone have a WONDERFUL day, week or life, and thank you for letting me post.
One more thing: Cat and Christine, YOU are the most important people here, because you remind me why I don't want to be out there anymore.
All my love
Joe
Member: Paul M.
Location: Santa Rosa, Ca.
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 20:31:02
Hi my name is Paul and I am a greatful recovering alcoholic. I am coming up on one year next month in this program and the difference I see in myself is startling. I had finally hit my rock bottom after 20+ years of drinking. I became teachable and willing. I took suggestions from my sponsor and became involved. For the woman who is new and fighting depression.Get out there and become involved in the meetings you attend. Get a coffeemaker or literature position. You will be amazed that when you start getting out of yourself and giving of yourself to others how much better you will start to feel. Also give yourself time. None of us got here and became alcoholics over night. It is going to take some time before your mind and body can get focused again. My favorite slogan in AA is One Day At A Time. For that is all I have. Tommorrow is a mystery, yesterday is history and today is a present from God. By adhering to that way of life I have been able to stay sober. God bless all of you.
Member: Bob C.
Location: Calgary
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 21:13:12
Bob C., alcoholic - Happy B.B.B. to John H. in Burlington! SLOGANS - Good topic! The one I like is," Think,Think,Think." Used to confuse me because it seemed to me that one of my problems was that I thought to much! Now it means this to me; most of my life I reacted to things. I was always acting on impulse,on the first thing that would pop into my head. And this habit caused me a lot of grief. But now I'm learning not to act on that first thought, but to give things a second thought and then a third one. By doing this I am able to make better decisions, wiser judgements and kinder words. Perhaps this is part of being restored to sanity! Live Easy But Think First!
Member: LOIS B
Location: NM
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 21:55:57
LOIS ALCHOLIC I TOO WAS DEPRESSED, my first year but i did not give up going to meeting calling aa members working working & working with the programs doing service work helping aa member non-members also taking naps in the afternoon eating right at least the best i could !! PRAYING EACH NIGHT EVEN WHEN I DID NOT WANT TO ! IT WORKED !! 2 YRS IN JAN. ONE DAY AT A TIME FOR THE GRACE OF GOD
Member: Michael P.
Location: Mill City, Or.
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 22:36:50
Karen A./Ohio & Lois S./NM :
I had 2 yrs. 11-1 so being in a peer-group sense I got that warm heart glow from your encouragements.
CAT: myself having been a silver slipper i.e. multiple relapser for 15 or so years I can at least care enough to say for me It took a miracle from Outside...Away....Higher. hideously sick and spiritually bankrupt...bereft....without hope or light I mumbled some s*** to the effect of- I don't believe in me or you God but if you wanna take just a small crack at this dead meat I reach for you and whatever you is or you aint has got to be better than the god i've proved to be. So then Cat, some thing happened that sorta downloaded intuition or faith or love or whatever it takes to do life by life in contrast to doing life by death. Anyway thats kinda how it seems, and I don't understand miracles yet but Step 2 is ALIVE.
Member: Sharon
Location: S.E. New Mexico
Date: 16 Nov 1998
Time: 23:36:49
My name is Sharon and I am a drunk.My two favorite sayings from the program came from a very wise sponosor I used to have. "I have a God in my life who loves me no matter what",was wonderfull to hear after the things that I had done. My low self esteem was at an all time low coming into AA and that was very comforting to hear. My other one that I like to be reminded of is "There are no big deals today'. Starving children, abused puppies and the conitions in the middle east are big deals. I have it made tho, I can go to an AA meeting almost any time of the day here, I haven't been drunk in two years ten months and eleven days, because of sobriety my blessings are many. For Cat... alot of folks have posted some pertinent stuff above. If you can just get a little bit of sobriey time behind you it will make it a little easier. The craving was always an ass kicker for me after a slip. The honey and orange juice and maybe alot of chocolate will help. Above all stay around meetings. It's important for me to be around other alcoholics.Just to say my name and what I am reminds me of the first step and what all I lost(first huband, my kid's respect, home) By being sober I am gradually gaining their trust again.Importantally my self esteem, too. Oh yeah, I don't want the ex's respect back. My current husband is very supportive and showed me how to find this site. Thanks!
Member: Andy G.
Location: Austin,Tx.
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 09:15:37
The problem is always in the mirror. The hard part is getting over excusitis.
Member: Mary H
Location: Weed, Ca.
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 12:14:15
My favorite slogan is one I heard at a meeting several years ago when the topic was slogans and applying them to our lives. "The elavator is broken please use the steps." I found how important this became to me because today I am learning how to apply each of the steps to my daily life. When I first came to AA is had the idea that you found a sponsor, worked the steps, one at a time, and then you got better. I had no thoughts of applying them to my daily life or that it would make a difference. I learned differently. For the fist couple of years I found myself doing the first three steps every morning before I started the day. A good reminder for me. Today, I focus on 10, 11, and 12 on a daily basis. I still do the others as well and I remember no elavator. AA is a simple program, but doing the steps and applying them is not always easy. The walk has been interesting one with all of its ups and downs and doing life "one day at a time." Thank you for allowing me to participate in this meeting.
Member: james b
Location: NYC
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 12:51:02
Hi, I'm James and I'm an alcoholic.
I'm still counting days, getting close to 90, and when I was first getting sober I couldn't read. I could not concentrate enough to read a complete sentence, let alone an entire paragraph! For that reason, the slogans were really helpful to me. And to be honest, I generally hate slogans, they're generally a pet peeve of mine - they sound cliche to me sometimes, or like something people just rattle off without thinking about. But there is a reason certain slogans are thrown around the rooms so much - they work. First things first, Keep coming back, The first drink is too many, the last drink is not enough...it's all true. "It will pass" is another one that initially annoyed me but now brings me comfort. i have had a few good days in sobriety, so i know that days where i feel horrible and want to drink like today will pass.
james b
Member: Cherise L.
Location: PA
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 14:03:59
Hi I'm Cherise and I'm a Grateful alcoholic.
Thanks for the topic Rudy. Usually when I am intolerant of others it's something I see in them that I want to help in myself. The hardest thing for me in early recovery was looking at my own side of things. I easily blamed most around me for my behavoir.
Learning the slogans has helped me alot in early recovery and now coming up on three years they are helping me still. My Dad is dying, and I am SOBER and available to help him. Keeping close to this program, the steps, my sponsor, I am able to be OK through all this. But at the same time I need the slogans like Easy Does It, Let Go Let God, This Too Shall Pass, and most of all I AM POWERLESS. Being able to be with my Dad is a Miracle and a true GIFT from God. I just recently got married and it's been hard on my husband me going back and forth to NJ. and my ego can also get in the way. I cannot do everything by myself (although I like to pretend I can) and I have to find balance. I am so so Grateful for the tools of AA and the fellowship for allowing me to admit my defects and do something about them, and most of all for the ability to hep others.
Today I do NOT have to pick up a drink and I know I could get through anything with the help of my Higher Power and all of you!!!!Thanks for letting me vent through my rough times. Love to all!
Member: cliff w
Location: hiawatha kansas
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 15:44:50
hi cliff, alky.! Good topic I hit my monday night meeting last night and we had 19 in attendance which is big for hiawatha kansas. Anyway i got alot out of it because I shared and I listend.I got sober in Moreno Valley Calif. and one of my sponser, named go slow TOM alway said go slow and easy, go slow and easy./ This was especaily helpfull because wanted to get better NOW. That didnt sit well with me so I got another sponser who said "you will get better in time", I said "when" he said "I time".I didnt like that and got a new sponser who said "yesterday is a cancelled check, tomorrow is a promisary note and TODAY is cash on the barrowl head son, you get out of it what you put in to it". THAT WAS TEN AND A HALF YEARS AGO and by the grace of God I have not found it nessessaey to drink, smoke (pot) or use sense. I fell confident that If I dont rest on my laurels I can make another happy joyous and free ten years. For you new comers, just keep coming back and dont drink between meetings and you wont get drunk I promis. ((((((((((((((( HUGS))))))))))) ps please dont mind the spelling8jjffyyttt
Member: Michelle V
Location: Illinois
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 17:59:02
I really like the slogans--for me, First Things First really quiets my mind when it starts going from this to that to the other thing. The slogans were easier for me to remember than the Steps when I came into the program and are still near and dear to my heart. I try to apply Live and Let Live throughout the day, but boy it is hard. I drank for 30 years, and after two years of sobriety I really don't know how to relate to people or how to react to nasty behavior in others. I used to just not speak up and then I'd be in a rage inside. Now, I think I'm speaking up too much--it's going the other way. I suppose the pendulum will swing back to middle in time. Thanks for letting me share and to all the newcomers keep on coming back. The program works, it really, really does.
Member: Corinne B.
Location: Northern CA
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 20:22:49
Hi, All - I'm an Alcoholic and my problem is Corinne. My favorite slogan is Keep it Simple Sweetie. Today I need to keep things really simple, because, you see, I've been back out there for the past 6 1/2 years. I started trying to complicate things by trying to be a "normal" person again. After beginning to read the Big Book again, I am certain to a man that idea must be smashed!
I only now have almost 3 days of re-newed sobriety, which is quite humbling because I threw away 6 years and 6 weeks that had so freely been given to me. And I hope for your prayers to be answered like some of you somewhere were continuing to pray for me - it must have worked because I'm back.
Most of the slogans and the program itself have stuck with me all these years and I am grateful to have these new rooms opened to me here on "stayingcyber." I just found this 10 minutes or so ago, and WOW! As I also have HepC, I really will be living ODAT! My health is not that great, so at times, this may be the only meeting I can come to.
So, thanks for being here! I was only able to read the first few postings that Rudy opened up the topic of slogans and character defects to, but wanted to post while I was here to share what I don't even have yet, but will keep comin' back. It's good to see so many folks from Florida here, because it was in Brevard County that you first helped me work on my own character defects.
Keep Comin' Back is an important slogan, too, because it is a constant reminder of what folks like me with a quick forgetter need to do each day - Don't Drink and Go To Meetings!
I'll be back next week for sure! Corinne B.
Member: LeeS
Location: So. Cal.
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 21:47:41
Hi everyone. My name is Lee and I'm an alcoholic. Like Connie, I've been out for a while -- today is my first day back. The slogan I lost while being out there was "Keep Coming Back -- It Works if you Work It."
Thank you all for your input and for letting me share. I always feel better after a meeting.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:00:30
hi, my name is richard m. i am an alcoholic.. alcohol was but a symptom of my problem....and my alcoholic problem is in my mind...... this is why once i put the bottle down ... i had to start feeding my mind with the right stuff..... my mind had left the cosmos and definetly needed A WAY HOME......... a.a. book helped mind to under stand something e was wrong many hours reading the big book, alone , with some one else and at BB meetings...began to work... began reading the good book the right way. new light begins to pour forth......praise god lots of love richrd m.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:04:20
hi, my name is richard m. i am an alcoholic.. alcohol was but a symptom of my problem....and my alcoholic problem is in my mind...... this is why once i put the bottle down ... i had to start feeding my mind with the right stuff..... my mind had left the cosmos and definetly needed A WAY HOME......... a.a. book helped mind to under stand something e was wrong many hours reading the big book, alone , with some one else and at BB meetings...began to work... began reading the good book the right way. new light begins to pour forth......praise god lots of love richrd m.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:05:49
hi, my name is richard m. i am an alcoholic.. alcohol was but a symptom of my problem....and my alcoholic problem is in my mind...... this is why once i put the bottle down ... i had to start feeding my mind with the right stuff..... my mind had left the cosmos and definetly needed A WAY HOME......... a.a. book helped mind to under stand something e was wrong many hours reading the big book, alone , with some one else and at BB meetings...began to work... began reading the good book the right way. new light begins to pour forth......praise god lots of love richrd m.
Member: Michael P.
Location: Or.
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:07:18
Corinne B. Thanks for sharing straight from the heart thataway. I finally got what ODAT is as I studied your message, just what I needed to get here was 15 +/- yrs. of intermittent relapse so for me that was anything but a waste, may I speak for myself to say you are among your own, i believe this and you're loved and prayers will never be despised.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:11:06
hi, my name is richard m. i am an alcoholic.. alcohol was but a symptom of my problem....and my alcoholic problem is in my mind...... this is why once i put the bottle down ... i had to start feeding my mind with the right stuff..... my mind had left the cosmos and definetly needed A WAY HOME......... a.a. book helped mind to under stand something e was wrong many hours reading the big book, alone , with some one else and at BB meetings...began to work... began reading the good book the right way. new light begins to pour forth......praise god lots of love richrd m.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:12:17
hi, my name is richard m. i am an alcoholic.. alcohol was but a symptom of my problem....and my alcoholic problem is in my mind...... this is why once i put the bottle down ... i had to start feeding my mind with the right stuff..... my mind had left the cosmos and definetly needed A WAY HOME......... a.a. book helped mind to under stand something e was wrong many hours reading the big book, alone , with some one else and at BB meetings...began to work... began reading the good book the right way. new light begins to pour forth......praise god lots of love richrd m.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:13:53
hi, my name is richard m. i am an alcoholic.. alcohol was but a symptom of my problem....and my alcoholic problem is in my mind...... this is why once i put the bottle down ... i had to start feeding my mind with the right stuff..... my mind had left the cosmos and definetly needed A WAY HOME......... a.a. book helped mind to under stand something e was wrong many hours reading the big book, alone , with some one else and at BB meetings...began to work... began reading the good book the right way. new light begins to pour forth......praise god lots of love richrd m.
Member: Michelle C.
Location: Midwest
Date: 17 Nov 1998
Time: 23:28:01
Hi - newcomer here. I just found this site, while working up my nerve to attend a "live" meeting. You see, I was convinced that I was living with the alcoholic, I wasn't an alcoholic, too. But I finally have to admit I am. I've been sober 3 days. I am an alcoholic. When Friday comes, I go crazy. I can't eat, and I think about drinking all afternoon -- until I finally can do it. I', scared of this Friday. Oh, by the way, I used to attend al-anon (I know) because I wasn't the alcoholic -- the person I live with is. Anyway, I'm familiar with the slogans. I like Live and let Live. Thank you to everyone for sharing -- it's helping me get the courage.
Member: Bill W
Location: Nova Scotia, Canada
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 02:42:15
Morning friends, I'm Bill and I'm an alcoholic. My gosh but there is a lot here. Congratulations to Lee,Corine, Michelle and Susan. Perhaps its not one of those plaques one sees on room walls but for me a hand shake/hug and welcome help me all the time. I do however carry the slogans with me and try to use them. Being human I sometimes fail and have to give myself a kick in the pants and start over again. I once met a fellow in this programme who said that he attended meetings for seven years and continued to drin. One day things finally sank in and he hasn't had a drink since. Perhaps he was thinking about Tradition three, The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. Some of use are sicker than others. We only have today and that is what is most important. Using that day to improve ourselves rather than take a drink can be the best day of your life. God Bless you all.
Member: Jerry C
Location: Manitoba Canada
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 07:13:59
Although it is not one of our slogans, a little sign that read "Keep Comming Back" hanging on the wall of my group I believe gave me just enough courage in my early sobriety to do just that. When I was in early sobriety I did not feel that I was good enough to be allowed to attend A.A. meetings, let alone belong to a group. However this little sign on the wall at the exit of my group gave me a little hope that was very much missing. Thank You God for A.A.
Member: Mike W
Location: New Hampshire
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 13:06:45
Hi Mike, alcoholic, to Michelle C. Welcome aboard! When I first started I was scared also, but I was more scared of booze and what It had done to me so I went to a meeting. You don't have to and probably can do it alone, I know I can't. Find a meeting and go. Introduce your self to someone there or just sit and listen. My first meeting I was to scared and messed up to go up and get a cup of coffee.
The truth is you never have to drink again, you never have to feel that knot in your stomach again and all that miserey, AA offers a complete and total program for the recovery from the illness of alcoholism. All you have to do is go to meetings, listen to what is said there and identifiy with the stories you here, do not compare yourself to others. ASK FOR HELP, you will get what you need, a wonderful new life that gets better each day. Do what we do and you to will get what we have. Good luck Mike W.
Member: Joe D.
Location: Phoenix
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 14:13:28
Thanks, Jerry C., for including "Keep coming back" in the slogan list. I agree with you--it is a most important phrase. When I left my first meeting, I had every intention of going to get a drink, because I needed to get well! A young lady handed me a meeting schedule and said, "Keep coming back!" I said, "I'll try." She said, "I don't want to hear 'I'll try.' I want to hear I'll come back." So I looked through the meeting schedule, found another starting soon and went. At that meeting I met the guy who was to become my sponsor, and I heard things I needed to start on recovery. That was 18 years ago, and I haven't had a drink since. "Keep coming back" really works!! JoeD
Member: PAT P
Location: SUFFOLK UK
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 15:19:28
My names Pat&im an alcoholic. this is a good topic, one ive never heard disscused, i love all the slogans they helped me so much when i couldnt take any thing else in, but i think my favorite was and still is, this too shall pass,it helps so much to see them every week in print around the room. I was so sick when i first came in the rooms i called them pious platitudes, not realising for a second how precious they were to become to me my HP has been so patient with me and still is every day,im given a reprive,by GODS grace. Iknow its not a slogan but it jumps out every time its read (((REMEMBER WE DEAL WITH ALCOHOL CUNNING BAFFLING AND POWERFUL.))) Bless you all LOL in the fellowship PAT P
Member: Rob B.
Location: New Jersey
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 15:56:19
Hi, my name is rob and I'm an alcoholic. This is the first time I have admitted to myself that I have a problem. I want and need help. AlthoughI have never attended a "Live" meeting, I have plans to. In reading the comments, I found the slogan "One Day At A Time" and "First Things First" easy to relate to. with gods power and the help of you all I think I can make it. Please pray for me, as I will pray for you. God Bless
Member: Georgina R.
Location: Edmonton, Alberta
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 17:27:30
Hi, Georgina, Alcholic, Boy what a powerful topic, when back when when I first came into the program the slogans kept me going, the one that I hated was that it take time, I dreaded anyone saying it take time to time, another one that I like today and I use it a lot is "DON'T GO AWAY AND YOU WON'T HAVE TO COME BACK." Have a good one, Georgina
Member: Linda O
Location: PTB, FL
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 18:35:34
Hi! I'm Linda and I'm an alcoholic.
A BIG WELCOME to Susan, Michelle, Corinne, Lee, and Rob!! I just want to strongly suggest that you take the advice given by Mike W. He said it all! We're here for you and will look forward to your posts as you go through these early days of sobriety.
KEEP COMING BACK -- EASY DOES IT -- THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!!!
In love and service
Member: Pete
Location: sw Michigan
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 19:54:12
Hi everyone. I'm Pete ... an alcoholic.
Welcome to all the newcomers !!... I can remember those early days in AA, and they were no different than yours. I struggled and anguished .... was very fearful and confused ... just like it was 11 years when I first went to AA and then had a 9 year slip. The only difference is that the second time I SURRENDERED ..... and knew it instinctively when I did. .
The topic that Rudy hit upon is extremely important to me. All these AA sayings help me immensely..... especially one day at a time. It made total sense to focus in the today ... not yesterday and not tomorrow. I could only handle one hour at a time then .... said the serenity prayer over and over..... and started to give my Higher Power my problem and keep surrendering each hour and each day.
Enough said .....except, thank you all for saving my life !!! ..... I'm only one drink away from destruction and death. Keep the faith and God bless you all. .............. Pete
Member: Tanya 11/21/97
Location: Seattle
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 21:06:58
Hello, my name is Tanya and I'm an alcoholic. This is the first time that I've visited this page. My favorite slogan is definitely "One Day At A Time." I will have 1 year on November 21st and this time was put together not just one day at a time, but sometimes one hour at a time, or even one minute at a time!! One thing that I definitely need more of is "Live and Let Live," especially as the holidays draw closer and the inclination to take family members' inventories is at its priime!! Thanks for letting me share; I'll be back next week!!
Member: Verrell C.
Location: Florida
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 21:34:35
Hi My name is Verrell and I`m an alcoholic, This is my first visit to this site and it is a great meetiong topic. The first slogan I remember being told is KISS (keep it simple stupid). Being an alcoholic I kept trying to complicate this wonderful program by making it difficult. One daqy I realized how easy it was to stay sober__don`t drink today__go to a meeting__call AA friends,etc. I thank God daily for keeping me sober one day at a time. The other thing I remember being told was Keep Coming Back. I did that too. It works if you work it. Thanks for leting me share.
Member: Doug
Location: Tennessee
Date: 18 Nov 1998
Time: 22:51:55
One day at a time is about the only slogan I can grasp at times. The beauty of it is that it applies to all of life problems. Also, I have been told that it is important every day in prayer to ask God to keep me away from drink for just that one day. Another slogan I like from my home group--" I'm not all there, that's why I'm here." God Bless all of you.
Member: Arne E
Location: Oslo Norway
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 09:52:01
Hi Iam Arne and Iam an alcoholic. Here at my homeplace we are using the same slogans as you folks. For me there are two I like and try to live after. The first is LIVE AND LET LIVE. Why? I tell you. When I was a drunk alcoholic, I found everything wrong with about everbody. I could watch a person and my fantasy just started to run away. After a while, my imagination had built this person to be the bigest a...ole in the world. The worse about this, was that I felt all right about my imagination running wild like that. I was the only normal person in the whole world. I now understand my sicness a little better, and I understand that the abnormal was the normal for me.Today Iam training myself to find the positive things in people. Like in the morning, when I go with the metro to work downtown, I look at the people around me and tell myself that there is somthing good in all of them. The other slogan I and lots of my AAfriends are using is " STICK TO THE WINNERS" We all are winners. We are doing something with our problem!!! Thanks for keeping me sober.
Member: Dave
Location: Massachusetts
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 10:28:16
Hi, everybody, my name's Dave and I'm an alcoholic. LIVE AND LET LIVE is my personal slogan. Every day I try to let at least three people "off the hook". They don't know how lucky they are (ha, ha). Here's one I haven't seen posted yet:
F E A R : F*ck Everything And Run
(That's what I'm tempted to do when I'm scared.)
Thanks for letting me share.
Member: Bruce
Location: StCatharines
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 12:35:03
Hi, I'm an alcoholic and my name is Bruce. If I have both the inclination and the time to take another person's inventory, then I have failled to understand the true meaning of LIVE AND LET LIVE. I would only be paying lip service to humility, because no humble person could ever feel it is within them to inventory the life of somebody else...that is not God's will for me, that's my desire to compare and grade. This is not only NOT my job, but it is WRONG! Who am I to take somebody else's inventory?? Just because I have some time in the program, doesn't mean I have erased all the shitty things that I have done, said or been. When I LIVE AND LET LIVE, I accept the fact that I am just a run of the mill drunk, no better than anyone else who is trying to get sober, and therefore, have no right to judge others. May you all be blessed with another 24 hours of sobriety.
Member: Tom A.
Location: Carlisle, AR
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 14:10:09
Hello! My name is Tom A. and I am an alcoholic who is sober today by "The Grace of God." This was the first cliche (saying, slogan) that I ran into at my first AA meeting on July 25, 1960 in Norfolk, VA. It was hanging over the end of a podium. I am a collector of cliches they have helped to keep sober one-day-at-a-time for these many 24 hours, but please remember this the oldest member in AA is the who got up the earliest this morning and hasn't taken a drink. Another pithy saying. The second cliche I heard in AA was that "Any damn fool can stay sober 24 hours." and upon reflection it works for me today as it did that first day. I am looking at a list of about 26 cliches that I have collected and I read them over quite often and then I am reminded what Doctor Bob said about not lousing the program up, and keeping it simple (sweetie or stupid). and the cliches have helped me to do this. One more I remember from my first year. A drunken college professor from Old Dominion College came to the meeting one night and said to all of us that he knew why program was working for us and not him. He said "I spend to much time analying this program and not enough time utilizing it. I thank that professor for that insight because it has help to stay away from that first drink!
I welcome all the newcomers! I also like to say along with others "Keep Coming Back It Works If You Work It And I Won't If You Don't." And some of the groups here in Arkansas add this to it "Beleive That."
God Bless your friend Tom A.
Member: George M.
Location: Boston
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 16:21:59
Hi My name is George and I am an alcoholic. And I love this site.Trying to catch up with everyone,I use to look at the solans and think "what the ****". But now I know by just hanging around(KEEP COMING)that they really do make sence.So with that said ,here goes Christine S. go work in a soup kit. and see if there isn't onesome who would trade places with you in a heartbeat. Mike M. Ask your friend out for coffee and maybe a meeting. Rivner Great message THANKS! Easy does it has been my favorite solgan sence I came into the program. Cat JUST KEEP COMING<REMEMBER YOUR WORTH IT. Susan S. Welcome,Don'ttry to get it all at once.The program is like a rollercoaster it has big ups and downs at first just hang in .
These are just my opinions I could be wrong But I just hope I can help another drunk. ((Love to all)) George M.
Member: Jenni.A.
Location: Canada
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 16:24:59
Hi My name is Jenni, I obviously have a drinking problem or I would not be here.(on this site) I guess you could call me an alcoholic as when I drink I drink heavy. I have black outs and say and do things beyond even my wild nature. I can go a long time with no alcohol, but when I do drink it is in excess. I have done things that I am not very proud of. I really need some guidence on how to avoid alcohol without becoming a social hermit. It is very difficult to make a stand " I quit drinking " when your co-workers and yes even the non bottom feeder friends think you don't have a problem. They think you are "FUN" I know I have it in me to quit, I just quit smoking (4.5 mos). I just need a little help. When I quit smoking everyone was so supportive. Smoking being such a visual/smelly thing . I guess it is really hard because everyone thinks I have "it together" when after a nite of fun I have no idea what I did or said. 1 year ago I said to my now x husband that I needed his help to not put us in situations where there was alcohol and he thought I was crazy. He didn't think I had a problem...Well I do. Please just some words of encouragment...would be greatly appreciated. No one knows, they think I am a well rounded career oriented young woman. IT is effecting my career and relationships. Never has anything had control over me...except alcohol Thanks everyone
Member: Joe P.
Location: Chicago
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 19:14:41
Jenni: It says in the Big Book that nobody can tell us we ARE alcoholics. And in the same vein, nobody can tell us we are NOT alcoholics. In truth, it's not whether WE think you're an alcoholic, but whether you do. I can empathize with "having it together" while knowing in my heart that my world was slowly getting more and more screwed up by drinking. The bad things were getting a little worse and happening a little more often every time. If you truly believe you have a problem with alcohol, and if you have decided you want what we have, then WELCOME! (and the heck with everyone else!).
As to being social, well, other than staying away from "drinking occasions" and "drinking places" (basically, avoid wedding receptions and bars [grin]), there's no reason not to continue to socialize. I would suggest first getting a sponsor who will help you through the decisions and getting some AA friends who will join you. I still go to restaurants and movies and plays and museums and amusement parks and bowling alleys and malls and parks and cabins and libraries and grocery stores and ... well, you get the point [smile].
Dave (from Massachusetts): There is another slogan that goes along with yours:
F E A R : F*ck Everything And Run
it's the flipside:
F E A R : Face Everything And Recover
Just one of those wonderful things that shows us there's always two ways to go with recovery: forward or backward.
Another personal favorite is NOT "My worst day sober is better than my best day drinking" because to me, it's not. I had some fun early in my drinking career, and newcomers can sense that the phrase isn't all true. I change one word: "My worst day sober is better than my LAST day drinking", and I mean it wholeheartedly (and it helps me remember what I felt like when I got in here this last time).
Anyway, God's peace, folks
I love you all
Joe
Member: lauren
Location: chesapeake bay
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 20:06:28
Hi everyone - lauren,alcoholic. I remember sitting around the rooms looking at the slogans posted on the walls and thinking how SIMPLE they are. Then after i got somewhat off my high horse, i realized "that's the point!!!" I needed things to be simple and sayings like FOLLOW DIrECTIONS OR, G.O. D. (GOOD ORDERLY DIRECTION ) or, Group Of Drunks were quick remiders of what AA has to offer us. Easy Does It, One Drink Away from a Drunk, and Don't Drink and Go to Meetings were all SHORTHAND for what I needed to do. A.A. means Attitude Adjustment! They all keep me sober - and I don't have to figure ANYTHING out except to remember what they actually mean!!
Member: charles M.
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 20:08:04
hi my name is charles and I'm an alcoholic from the new york area. I'd like to check in with everybody since this is my first time on-line. I am a newcomer to AA and this is my 12th day in the program.
Member: Liz S
Location: N. Alberta
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 21:34:22
Hi, my name is Pam and I am an alcoholic. This is my sixth week of sobriety. I still can't believe that I had done it!
Michelle - I too live with an alcholic (my second alcholic marriage) and for years I attended Al-Anon but drank myself. These last two years have been real hell and I began to solve all of my problems by having a drink (sometimes lots of drinks)and as a result my life fell apart. Things were pretty chaotic before and they really took a nose dive once both my husband and I were drinking heavily. Fridays scare me too as that when I always went out. I didn't have to work weekends so I could always have a few more and really party Friday nights. The more I drank the more depressed I got and the story goes on. One night my husband was out golfing and I knew he was on his way home so I phoned the police and he was picked up for impaired driving (I had been drinking too). Well, to make a long story short it came out in court last month that it was me that phoned the police. You can imagine what my life has been like. He goes back to court on December 7th and I don't know what is going to happen. Things at home have been interesting - not much conversation! I love my husband I guess that is why I did what I did but I wish I could turn the clock back. I don't know if our marriage can survive this one. By the grace of God I turned to AA as I knew that I too had a problem. I knew that if I didn't do something alcohol would be continuing to control my life. I do love my husband and I do want our marriage to work but I know now that I have to be sober for me - not for anyone else.
The AA slogans have helped me. Especially "Let Go and Let God" - I have to give this latest problems caused by alcohol to God. Lord knows I can't handle it.
I have read the Big Book from cover to cover and I now realize I am not alone. The fellowship from AA has been wonderful. Without my sponsor and other I don't know if I would have made it this far. I was contemplating suicide but I have an 11 year old son and I can't let him suffer any more than he already has.
I live one day at a time - that is all I can handle right now. I thank God each morning and evening for my sobriety.
For those of you that believe in the power of prayer - please say one for me and my marriage.
Member: Jill G.
Location: Austin
Date: 19 Nov 1998
Time: 21:47:54
Hello strangers (that know me better than my friends)! I am a struggling alcoholic, and my name is Jill. I have been reading your postings for days, and I truly appreciate and applaud each entry. But what truly drove me to post on the subject of slogans, were the two breakdowns of the acronym" FEAR"". Thank you Dave and Joe. "F**k Everything and Run", or" Face Everything and Recover". Brilliant! I am currently still going through withdrawl -alone. If anyone who has been in the late stages of this disease knows what this is like, you will know that fear is the only identifiable emotion that you feel. I have never been to an AA meeting. I am thankful for this website and all who over hope.G
Member: Debbie H.
Location: Maine
Date: 20 Nov 1998
Time: 00:24:57
Hi! Everyone, I'm a greatful recovering alcoholic and addict, my name is Debbie H. Welcome to all the newcomers to AA. Reading your posts brought be right back to remembering my first few years in the program. Thank God, for today, so far, I've only had to sober up once (except for the half hearted 1st start that lasted 3 mos. Gave up pot, but thought I could still drink - DAAAA!!) all the slogans helped my, but the most help was when my sponser told me if I didn't have a Higher Power, I could borrow hers, until I found my own. Her's worked, Mind didn't. I thought God was punishing me for being the BIGGIST SINNER. Today, with the help of AA, my AA Family and the Grace of God, I have my God and my sponser has her HP back.
I was one week sober when my son died and a woman I didn't even know, took me under her wing, dragged me to meetings (I really just wanted to drink, thank you very much, I didn't want to think, remember..... you get the Idea). And followed my every move until after the funeral and some inpatient treatment - which I called protective custody. Anyway, I was in no condition to really THINK those first few months, but everyone was so nice, and didn't judge me, made me feel so welcome, I KEPT COMING BACK. Like they say, if you don't get the program, it may get you, just keep coming back. It works if you let it. To all my suffering friends - Catch a hug and remember God loves you and so do I. Thank YOU for helping keep me sober another day and for listening to me ramble.
Member: dJ
Location: norfolk
Date: 20 Nov 1998
Time: 08:27:15
HI ALKIE HERE;JILL G.FIND US IN THE PHONE BOOK CALL FOR HELP UNDER AA; SOME ONE IN AA NEEDS YOUR CALL; TO HELP THEM
TODAY.SO A !!! WE !!!AND HIGHER POWER AND YOU. BLESS YOU DJ
Member: Butch S.
Location: JACKSON MS.
Date: 20 Nov 1998
Time: 11:05:07
Hi Butch Alcoholic.When we put the letter {D}in front of the Word ANGER {WE get DANGER}Thats where we get when we get that way.LOVE AND PEACE
Member: David H.
Location: East. Canada
Date: 20 Nov 1998
Time: 11:55:01
To Jill G. - Please make the call. I promise you will never regret it. Alcoholics can't do it alone. The beauty of A.A. is that you don't have to..... I'm willing to bet there are people "Praying for you " right know. Keep an open mind & get to a MEETING..
Love in the fellowship David H.
.
Member: Michelle M.
Location: Southern Maine
Date: 20 Nov 1998
Time: 14:57:24
I am an alcoholic and my name is Michelle. The topic is slogans, and my favorite one is "This too, shall pass...". I think that AA has many more slogans than just the ones that we hang on little cardboard signs in our meeting places. Early this week I went to a final divorce hearing to end my long marriage. That night a very close woman friend of mine died. She died with almost twelve years of sobriety and taught me a lot about loving and letting go. I know that "this too, shall pass" does not mean that she will come back to life, but that the feelings I am experiencing about her death will pass. Today I went to a meeting and everyone there talked about her and what wonderful gifts she brought us in our collective recovery from alcoholism. If it weren't for her, I would have never known the importance of sitting down and spilling my guts to another woman alcoholic, nor would I know the joy of laughter shared and the ease of heartache and pain cut in half by telling another human being about it. This woman was very instrumental in my sobriety...I moved to my area at a year and a half sober and I was so afraid of meeting new AA's and making new friends. She invited me to coffee every week and welcomed me into her wide circle of friends. I will miss her very much, but I need to remember that the love she gave me and the friendship that she shared with me I can keep by giving it away to someone else. Her funeral got over about an hour ago, and I feel so much anger right now about her death, but I know that "This too, shall pass..." and that the women friends I have in AA that shared her friendship will be in my life now and will help me get through the grief as I will for them. I needed to share this, and I hope that I have not strayed too far from the topic of slogans. God bless you all and Thank you God for Cindy and AA.
Member: Connie-Alcoholic
Location: Missouri
Date: 20 Nov 1998
Time: 19:44:17
Ruby-thank you for the topic, one of my favorite slogan is one day at a time, because I can project to far in the future and think about what is going to happen. Like my going back to CT I been looking at all the things that might happen all negative of course. However, I know I can't do that. Because tomorrow not hear, it will never come, I can only live in today, because that is all I have today./Then let go and let God. I love that one too. Cause I am someone who loves to hold onto things I am comfortable with. I hate letting go, But when I finally do, I feel so much better, that is my stubborness./This too shall pass, boy when I am caught up in my own crap I really don't think I am ever going to get out. It like my whole life is going to blow-up right before my eyes. And of course everyone keeps saying this too shall pass, it usually does, about a couple days later. It is just another lesson I have learned in my sobriety.
I love you all, Keep coming back and share your e, s, and hopes.
Member: Joane H
Location: Michigan
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 00:16:50
Hi I am Joane a grateful recovering alcholic. I think this is a really good topic. I use the slogans today after six years of sobriety. They can keep me going through the rougher times and remind me I am not alone. "One day at a time" is my favorite, because that really is all we ever have-just today. As far as other's character defects: it is much easier for me to point out your defects because I don't tend to see mine all the time. Yet when I point out someone else's defects mine tend to come back and haunt me. What I dislike in others is what I tend to dislike in myself. So when I start to character assassinate someone I am positive that I will be put in a position that I need to look at myself; because it always comes back to me. Thanks for letting me share and have a great day-sober day.
Member: Robin P
Location: Washington
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 01:54:18
I haven't had a drink today
Member: ROBIN H
Location: N.P.
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 02:18:42
THE SLOGAN I LIKE IS "BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD" THAT COULD BE ME IF I DON'T WORK MY PROGRAM TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY.
Member: ROBIN H
Location: N.P.
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 02:19:24
THE SLOGAN I LIKE IS "BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD" THAT COULD BE ME IF I DON'T WORK MY PROGRAM TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY.
Member: Bill T
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 06:46:35
My name is Bill, I'm an alcoholic. The slogan I used in the beginning is THINK. And then I would ask myself which slogan do I need to be thinking about? I could always find one or more which applied to whatever my situation was. I needed them all and still do. And, of course, best of all - although not exactly a slogan - DON'T DRINK AND GO TO MEETINGS!
Member: lauren
Location: chesapeake bay
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 08:42:20
hello- lauren(again) - alcoholic, I just wanted to say to Jill, a slogan that always helped me is You Don't Have to do this Alone.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasots, fla.
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 08:52:12
hello again, still an alcoholic, still richard... there are those who do not understand our little a.a. slogan factory...... the slogans are like our steet and higwaysigns..i used to only see the ones..jackdaniels, cutty sark, chevis, crown royal ,drugs, budweiser, heinikin etc...etc..etc!!!!! todays its don't drink and go to meetings..easy does it ...live and let live...its in the book... one day at a time...bring the body the mind will follow. and gratefully many..many more.
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota, fla.
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 08:52:57
hello again, still an alcoholic, still richard... there are those who do not understand our little a.a. slogan factory...... the slogans are like our steet and higwaysigns..i used to only see the ones..jackdaniels, cutty sark, chevis, crown royal ,drugs, budweiser, heinikin etc...etc..etc!!!!! todays its don't drink and go to meetings..easy does it ...live and let live...its in the book... one day at a time...bring the body the mind will follow. and gratefully many..many more.
Member: virgil w
Location: des moines ia
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 12:54:43
what can i say only that i stay sober by not taking that first drink. and it has worked for me for 18 years now
Member: Karen C
Location: CA
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 13:45:38
Well, I've been checking this site for 10 days now, and It's really helped. I live in a rural area and haven't been to any meetings. I can really relate to Jill, and Thank Joe for his wise words. Since I"ve been reading the slogan "stinking thinking" as really hit home. I thought I was the only one who thought about drinking, 24/7 -- when I was drinking thoughts like well It's ok, I deserve it, I need to relax ect., and now on day 10 I'm mostly afraid of the holidays with family who will be handing me a cold one before I'm out of the car -- but I'm listening to "one day at A time" and trying to put those thoughts away -- cause I just need to worry about today. I'm trying but still scared. Like Jill, this together mother and career woman knows what alcohol is doing to me, luckily so does my husband who is glad I found this site. I need some more help. Tanks for everyone being there.
Member: Stan P
Location: Penna.
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 14:10:45
Hello everybody Im still stan and Im still an alcoholic only I dont have to climb atree and tell a lie anymore , I can stand on the ground and tell the truth.I borrowed that one just like these two::Honesty is part of the program:::Let Your attitude be gratitude.Thanks for letting me listen and share.Keep coming back.It works if we work it.
Member: sean b
Location:
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 15:30:55
Member: Joni M.
Location: CA
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 18:08:40
Hi I'm Joni and I think I'm in the right place but I don't know yet. Thanks for the sharing, a lot of it sounds familiar. I'm just ttrying to get through day ONE right now so perhaps One Day at a Time is where I am. Thanks for listening.
Member: david b
Location: washington
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 19:18:14
try the chicken snack tray, or the snickers bar
Member: Mike p.
Location: mill city, OR
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 20:52:34
"God will not desert us when the chips are down" - b.wilson letter 1966.
I also like the bumper sticker:
Protected By Smith & Wilson
Member: Diane L
Location: Phillips, Wisc
Date: 21 Nov 1998
Time: 21:54:56
Diane Alcoholic.. I've been aware of AA since 1970, was involved in alanon for a few years and crossed the line so to speak. I too have been in, on, around, everywhere except where I should have been, accepting that I cannot drink, even one drink of alcohol,In the beginning It was so hard because I thought I was too young, and did not want to be left behind on the party nights. In the past 5 years these past 54 days have been the most I've been able to put more than 2 days together without conning myself that I deserved a few drinks. I now wake in the morning and Thank God I made it another day. Another 24 hours. I enjoyed some of the new sayings I saw here and have written them down so I can refer to them as needed.. May God Bless All for being here today, By The Grace Of God Sincerely Diane.L
Member: Clint stationed in Turkey
Location: clintjanofski@hotmail.com
Date: 22 Nov 1998
Time: 02:17:55
Clint, alky, thought I was doing real good.(2 weeks sober) Went out and got drunk on Friday night. It is Sunday morning now and I still feel guilty. When will this finally end? I guess all that I can do is try again.
Member: Clint stationed in Turkey
Location: clintjanofski@hotmail.com
Date: 22 Nov 1998
Time: 02:19:06
Clint, alky, thought I was doing real good.(2 weeks sober) Went out and got drunk on Friday night. It is Sunday morning now and I still feel guilty. When will this finally end? I guess all that I can do is try again.
Member: Dianne H
Location: Prescott, AZ
Date: 22 Nov 1998
Time: 02:34:47
Hi! Good topic! When I first came into AA, I had a smart sponsor. She noticed that I was always taking some elses inventory,especially blaming my mother for all of my current problems (I was 34!). Instead of lecturing me, she had me take a piece of paper and draw a line down the center. On one side she had me write down all of my mothers charactor defects. She had me do that before she would tell me what to put on the other side of the paper. I went to work with entheusiasm, writing down all of my mothers faults. She had me keep them to one or two word phrases, like "vindictive" or "liar". I was surprised that I couldn't come up with as many as I thought I should. I really only came up with five or six really dirty deeds that my mother had inflicted upon me. When I finished, my sponsor had me write on the other side of the paper any of the charactor defects that mom had that I also had. She also told me to add any others about myself that I could think of. What a trip! My list included all of those I accused my mother of having plus many more of my own! Then my sponsor had me describe to her in detail MY charactory defects and just how I used them to manipulate others! Next she told me that the paper represented a street. One side was my mothers side of the street, the other mine. Then she said... "Why don't you just stay on your side of the street Dianne. Looks like it will take you awhile to sweep it!" This is a lesson I have not fogotten in over 21 years! Well... sometimes I slip, but not for long.
Member: Dianne H
Location: Prescott, AZ
Date: 22 Nov 1998
Time: 02:43:18
Hi, Dianne H. here. To Diane L and Clint in Turkey... One day, one hour, one minute at a time. Go to lots of meetings, Internet or otherwise. You are not alone. Look to a higher power. Say the serenity prayer over and over and the slogans. Find a sponsor. Don't beat yourselves up over the slip, pick yourself up and keep coming back!