Member: Frank C.
Location: Yreka, CA
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 06:51:36

Comments

Hi My name is Frank C. I would like this weeks topic to be willingness. I believe that this is the key to sobriety.


Member: Pat R
Location: Bronx, NY
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 07:27:17

Comments

Willingness Is a great topic I was unwilling to accept alcoholism I thought I was crazy. I went to a psychiatric hospital and almost signed myself in but I remembered a sign from a meeting I had gone to drunk. Try us for 90 days and if you don't like us we will refund your misery. I did I wasn't crazy maybe some psych problems but that is all email jo2pat@mailexcite.com


Member: Mike C.
Location: OH
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 07:49:46

Comments

I agree. Willingness is the key that unlocks the door to sobriety. I have seen people who were at the meetings to appease someone else, whether it was a spouse, the court, etc., but were not willing to accept step one. They look for a softer, easier way, then return when alcohol beats them to submission. (if they are lucky, one I knew died this past Friday of self inflicted gunshot wounds, he wanted to get sober for his wife and thought he could replace alcohol with drugs.) I, personally, was court ordered into treatment. I lied my way through the shrink's office the first time, lied my way through counciling the second time, then was ordered to AA. I walked in prepared to lie my way through, and found love, understanding, and honesty. I got honest and then willing. I now have six months sobriety, a new outlook on life, and am willing to let my higher power guide me through another day doing Her will. I know now that I must be willing, but only one day at a time. thanks for letting me share. Mike C., willing to admit that I'm an alcoholic!


Member: richard m
Location: sarasota , fla...usa
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 10:04:00

Comments

hello my name is richard, i am an alcoholic. ...Untill i became willing to accept the truth of that statement, i remained in denial. i could not begin " my " recovery... i could not attened our meeting... Today almost 13 years later, i have done it one day at a time..( willing to not make projections ).... surrendering to gods will and letting go and letting god take charge.... mqay this week be a good one and may we all have sobriety and serenity.... if it is gods will for us...


Member: Phil W.
Location: Madison
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 11:10:20

Comments

I'm Phil, alcoholic and addict. By the time I sought help, I had sunk so low that boy, was I ever willing! For me, admitting that I was (am) an alcoholic was like admitting the sky is blue; it was obvious to everyone, including me. So I was willing and even desparate to stop drinking. What I had a problem with was the willingness to admit that I couldn't do it myself, and the willingness to believe that God could and would. When I walked into my first AA meeting and saw that G-word in the Steps my first thought was "Oh, sh*t," immediately followed by "Oh, well, what the hell." I was finally sick enough to let go and try ANYTHING to stop drinking. It turns out that that willingness to "let go and let God" has been probably about the only thing I have done right in this program. I now have over 10 years' worth of "one day at a time" without drinking, and believe me, it's not because of anything I have done other than to turn it over to my higher power. These days I am struggling to turn over other aspects of my personality, such as anger, resentment, and self-centeredness, so far without much success. I keep going back to that "I ought to be able to do this myself" attitude. But at least I continue (for today at least) to be able (and willing) to rely on God for my sobriety. Thanks for listening, and keep coming back.

Phil


Member: nother a
Location: norfolk
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 12:42:45

Comments

just a nother :alkie ready!!willing!!! and able next <fath-hope- and chartey don`t leave before your mircal comes god bless


Member: MARYANN  G.
Location: WARE, MASS.
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 13:07:07

Comments

hi my names maryann, i am an alcoholic. WILLINGNESS,indeed. if your not willing as far as anything goes than how can you ever make it work. good topic as one person said, step one. 100% assurance that you are powerless and can not manage your own life. this first step on a daily basis brings me to the point of willingness. and for that i need ACCEPTANCE in my life. ALL WE HAVE IS ONE DAY AT A TIME. WHY WOULDNT YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY FOR TODAY. GOD BLESSES ALL OF US ALCOHOLICS IN RECOVERY. WE ASK GOD TO BLESS THOSE WITH NO RECOVERY YET. THANKS FOR LISTENING. WE ARE FAMILY..........


Member: Bill G
Location: Garden Grove,CA
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 13:19:22

Comments

Hi,my name's Bill and I'm an alcoholic.Just now discovered this meeting while surfing the net.Glad to be here and glad to be sober. Wish I could talk longer but I have an AA meeting to attend here at noon.Talk to you all later.


Member: Donna Lou
Location: Syracuse, NY
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 13:35:50

Comments

Hi, I'm Donna Lou and I am an alcoholic...truly grateful to be sober today.....this is so cool....I just got access to internet and found this page while trying to learn how to use this.....willing to go to any lengths to stay sober, willing to take suggestions, willing to reach out to help a newcomer, willing to say yes when asked to do service work or sponsor someone.....willingness to change - all of this has brought me a wonderfulnew way of life (including having INternet!!!) and for all of this I am truly grateful.


Member: Judy K
Location: Mass.
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 14:13:59

Comments

Hi, my name's Judy and I'm an alcoholic - Thank you Frank for choosing willingness as our topic this week. Daily I learn that not only is willingness the key to my sobriety, but it is in turn my key to a life of simplicity, truth and ultimately love. If I am willing, the doors open before me.

It is scary for us to let go and be willing to let another alcoholic and a higher power show us the way. We alcoholics are masters of Self - self-control, self-will, self-thought, self-pity. I have to pray daily for the strength to let go of my will (e.g. get myself out of the way) and open my heart to receive God's will. The days I forget, my disease wins and I am lost to my self-will and I and everyone around me suffers.

But, oh, the days when I am able to get over myself and listen for my higher power, I become teachable. Words cannot express my gratitude for the gift of willingness I have received from Alcoholics Anonymous. Thank each and every one of you who are here today and have been walking with me on this journey of recovery. One day at a time. Peace. Judy


Member: Mary Ellen H.
Location: Weed, Ca
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 14:32:49

Comments

Hi, I'm Mary Ellen, alcoholic. My willingness comes in the idea of; to what length was I willing to go to get a drink, am I willing to go to that length to stay sober. If I was willing to walk in the snow to buy a bottle, I now have to be willing to walk in the snow to go to a meeting. My battle, today, usually comes with my willingness to give up what control I think I have and allowing my higher power to guide. I still suffer from people not acting the way I think they should. I'm learning, with difficulty, to be willing to accept people for who they are knowing they have a higher power in their life, and I'm not it! Reaching this point, I can now, with my higher power, work on the willingness to work on me. As a mother of three children I want to control their lives rather than be willing to let a higher power work in their lives. Thank you for taking the time to read my comments


Member: Scott J
Location: NH
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 15:36:33

Comments

Willingness is part of HOW the AA program works: with Honesty, Openness and Willingness. It was explained to me that the program of recovery is very simple, and that willingness is the first key.

Since I am powerless over alcohol, I need a power outside myself that is greater than myself to overcome alcoholism. I have come to believe in such a Power whose love for us is perfect. Out of perfect love, It respects our free will and will do nothing to us against our will. That is why willingness is vital to allow my Higher Power into my life. This Power is eagerly waiting to unload a mountain of gifts on me, but will not do so until I am willing to accept those gifts.

Unfortunately, willingness is not enough. I have to be open-minded about His gifts, whatever they may be. If I'm closed-minded and only willing to receive the gifts that I WANT to receive, that strictly limits my Higher Power's ability to work with me.

Also, if I take credit for His gifts or if I try to misuse them, they will end up doing me more harm than good. Out of His perfect love, my Higher Power will do me no harm and therefore will give me no gifts which I will misuse or take credit for. So I also need to honestly use such gifts and take no credit for myself.

With Honesty, Openness and Willingness, I open myself up to an abundance of gifts. With the honesty of step 1, openness of steps 2 and 3, and the willingness shown by working the rest of the steps, I open myself up to the gift of sobriety. I try to keep my program just this simple.


Member: Rob K.
Location: Binghamton, NY
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:05:22

Comments

when i first got sober my sposor asked if i was willing to go to any length. of course i said sure i was but at the time mabye. as time went on and was shown what mike C. from Ohio talked about(this is a disease that kills, there is not mabyes about it i have lost to many close ones both in the program and out)and decided that was not going to be the route for today i am willing.god bless. DONNA LOU FROM SYRACUSE DO YOU GO TO THE SALT CITY MIDWIMNTER ROUNDUP, IVE BEEN THERE EVERY YEAR FOR 5, MY SPONSOR HELPED NAME THE THING. LET ME KNOW NEXT MEETING


Member: Catie W.
Location: Morgantown, WV
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:22:03

Comments

Hi. I'm Catie and I'm an alcoholic. My disease hasn't won today because I am sober today. My self-will has been a little better in line with God's will than it was yesterday. Thank God! Yesterday was filled with rage, today amends. But even on a day like yesterday, my disease did not win. I stayed sober. I went to a meeting. I stayed after the meeting and cornered someone to talk to. Today I'll go to another meeting. I am responsible for this meeting. At first, I was totally unwilling to be the only responsible person for it. But it was the only meeting I could attend on Monday nights so I didn't want it to close. Now I feel grateful for this opportunity to do service. It's been a rewarding experince. There's not much that I'm not willing to do when it comes to my sobriety. My district needs a chairperson for Corrections. I've felt some guilt that I'm not standing for it. This is the first time in 6 years I haven't held a district office. But I just don't believe that I'm the right person for this job. I don't have anything else to add on willingness. Thanks for this meeting.


Member: Dale S.
Location: California
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:22:58

Comments

My name is Dale S. and I'm an Alcoholic………I believe that willingness should be viewed as an action word. "Affirmative action" as the 12+12 calls it. For example we have the child you is willing to mow the front lawn but never does it. Until he actually mows the lawn nothing important has happened. Step 3 talks about willingness more than any other step (See 12+12.) If you read step 3 in the 12+12 you will notice it asks the same question 3 times…. 1.).. "Therefore our problem now becomes just how and by what specific means shall we be able to let Him in?"… 2.)… "No matter how much one wishes to try, exactly how can he turn his own will and his own life over to the care of whatever God he thinks there is?"…3.)… "So how, exactly, can the willing person continue to turn his will and his life over to the Higher Power?" The same question is asked point blank three different times. But where is the answer? The answer is there, in step 3, but is took this complex alcoholic a long time to find it. It maybe quite simple to some but others never seem to get it. 'Get it?'….. Oh one more thing. Willingness is the key, not acceptance.


Member: rdeegrayrd
Location: @aol.com
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:43:08

Comments

WILLINGNESS: "RESCUED BY SURRENDERING" This short but powerful reading from daily reflections (feb 2) hit me head on. "Why do some of us die alcoholics, fighting to preserve the "independence" of our ego, while others seem to sober up effortlessly in AA? Help from a HP, the gift of sobriety also came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stop drinking coincided with my WILLINGNESS to ACCEPT suggestions of others. I had to surrender, for only by reaching out to God & others could I be rescued. I learned this lesson very well recently. I celebrated three years of sobriety 7/12/98 and on 8/20/98 suddenly(?) lost the willingness to surrender and went out to drink. After a few drinks - reality set in and I knew I had to surrender again - that alcohol was not what I wanted or needed. I came back to AA(one night of drinking was enough) and shared with others my experience, renewed strength and absolute hope! My HP spoke to me that night as he did 3 years ago when He told me "THIS IS INSANITY". This time it was so physicaly painful as well as a complete mental upset. With the care & help of others I am again on the path of spiritual growth with a renewed WILLINGNESS! Thankfully I came back from the depths of hell and can go on with my life using the tools I still have that I gained with my 3 years of working the steps. Yes, I still have the steps (they weren't drowned) but I just need to climb up the stairs again (slower this time).please anyone who needs to talk email me or instant message anytime!!!I recognize the cries for help as I too was there.


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:48:32

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I wet to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:49:59

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I wet to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 16:51:38

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I went to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.


Member: Dan O
Location: Spokane, WA
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 17:07:35

Comments

Hi my name is Dan and I am an alcoholic. I am willing to admit that today and that willingness has saved my life. The very first step i had to make in my recovery was to become willing to make a change. Once i became willing i could then admit that i was an alcoholic and that my live had become unmanagable. I could also admit that i could not recover on my own and that i needed help form from my higher power and other alcoholics like you. You could really hear and undestand my story and that was extremely important to me. Thank you God, thank you AA and thank you guys.


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 17:15:21

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I went to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 17:16:54

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I went to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 17:18:32

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I went to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.Frank1258@webtv.net


Member: Frank W
Location: Augusta, Ga
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 17:19:57

Comments

My name is frank and I am an alcoholic. Since I have been willing to be honest in all my affairs life has changed for me. I must be willing to work the steps to the best of my ability so I can grow and mature. I thank AA for the last 19 years of life that I ever knew existed. Donna Lou from Syracuse I just spent three weeks in Syracuse. Good AA. I went to eastwood and matteydale for most of my meetings. I am also from syracuse originally.Frank1258@webtv.net


Member: FGrank W
Location: Augusta. Georgia
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 17:30:17

Comments

Frank an alcoholic. Kept getting busy try again. Reason for duplicates


Member: paul f
Location: wolcottville,in
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 18:07:51

Comments

my name is paul i am an alcoholic.i have found that if i am not willing to be honest with myself that i can not be honest with others


Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 19:23:52

Comments

Larry, alcoholic.

Willingness to me is closely connected with acceptance and the 3rd Step. I try to be willing to accept whatever has happened whether I liked it or not, whatever will happen, whether I'll like it or not, and to be willing to do the next right thing whether I want to or not.

In other words, to be willing to accept life on life's terms and not on mine.


Member: Stephen O.
Location: Amherst MA
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 20:04:54

Comments

Hi, I'm Stephen and I am an alcoholic. Willingness for me means to open yourself up to the possibility of change. It means to make a conscious effort to rethink old patterns of behavior, to be aware of the negative thoughts and triggers that set off a drinking binge. It means to think and act positively and to regain control of your life.


Member: Carol G
Location: Ontario Canada
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 20:39:57

Comments

Until I was willing to surrender and take the direction of my Higher Power and those A.A. members who were kind enough to take me under their wings I was on the road to self-destruction. Now 13 years later and able ready and willing to reciprocate in kind my daily journey is as enjoyable as I WILL let it be. Thanks for being here.


Member: Mark W.
Location: Bloomington IN
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 23:00:54

Comments

Greetings to all -- Mark, alcoholic, perfectly described on page 30.

I don't know if it's my contrarian nature or what, but I've never put much stock in all the talk about "willingness." My problem is that I never know whether I'm willing to do anything or not until I actually do it. I might claim to be willing to change the oil in my car, but it doesn't get done unless I crawl under the heap and start turning wrenches. Talk is cheap. My "willingness" is merely an aknowlegement AFTER THE FACT that I saw a need to do something that I most likely would have preferred not to, whether that be changing my oil, chairing a meeting, making amends and restitution to someone I have harmed, or making a 12th Step call, and then did it. Contemplating action, without actually taking action, is what kept me drunk for so many years. Only when I take the actions necessary do I receive the benefits the Program has to offer.


Member: Marilyn M.
Location: Huntington Bch, CA
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 23:17:44

Comments

I am willing to learn to use this Internet! This is my first time ever "chatting" on the Net, and I made the choice to investigate the AA meeting online. I find this whole process to be pretty cool and a fabulous new addition to my sobriety. I've been sober for over 10 years, and it just keeps getting better--and more exciting. Not sure if I'm doing this right,but I'd enjoy getting comments from fellow sober members of AA! I'll keep coming back--it works!


Member: Marilyn M.
Location: Huntington Bch, CA
Date: 28 Sep 1998
Time: 23:20:50

Comments

I am willing to learn to use this Internet! This is my first time ever "chatting" on the Net, and I made the choice to investigate the AA meeting online. I find this whole process to be pretty cool and a fabulous new addition to my sobriety. I've been sober for over 10 years, and it just keeps getting better--and more exciting. Not sure if I'm doing this right,but I'd enjoy getting comments from fellow sober members of AA! I'll keep coming back--it works!


Member: Linda P (Traveler)
Location: CA, USA
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 00:10:43

Comments

Hi, I am Linda, an alcoholic.

Lots of great stuff being shared, thanks for the topic Frank. I found willingness was a state of mental preparedness to take action. A little mental gymnastics, LOL. When I have become aware of something I need to deal with, then tell myself that I need to take care of it, I make a thoughtful decision to take a specific action concerning the problem. Generally if I commit my thoughtful decisions in black and white on paper, I am committed myself to the action, and usually follow through. Such was the case when I did steps 8 and 9. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: ken (kc)  c.
Location: ful,ca
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 00:37:40

Comments

im kc alky,xcuse me for my shortness on words, im very tired.yes, willingness is a great topic, i can relate to that phil w from mad guy,my sbr date is 2-14-87, and have had my bouts with anger,the one thing that saved me was hearing about this guy roy masters-website www.fhu.com has been a real blessing,and the funny thing is,the 12 steps and principles of aa which got this alky sober,fall right in line with what mr masters teaches,so check him out,if youre interested in true understanding of the spirit of god as you understand god.good luck in your search for .... whatever it is your searching for,im still finding it hard to commit to the truth and the light when i think ive found some.anyway i could go on,on,on all nite.so by for this time. email is sbr21487@earthlink.net if you wish to discuss what you find or dont find. godbless you all. kc


Member: George M.
Location: Show Low, AZ
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 02:32:15

Comments

Hi, I am George M- alcoholic. It took me alot of years of pain, and suffering to become willing. To become willing enough to admit I can't do this by myself, to become willing enough to reach out for help, and to become willing enough to step aside and let my higher power into my life. I've learned over the past few years that for me to keep this gift of sobriety that I have been so freely given, that part of my willingness includes: willingness to chair meetings, give rides, clean ashtrays, and in short whatever it takes to insure that I don't pick up a drink today. I know that I don't ever want to experience that pain I went through before again, and in order to do so, I have to be willing to do this "one day at a time" Not tommorow, Not yesterday, but TODAY. Thanks for letting me share. AA Love.


Member: Bonnie C - 5/30/80
Location: Seattle
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 06:04:06

Comments

Hi extended family, bonnie/alcoholic here, (((ROOM-HUG))) good topic ((frank c)) WILLINGNESS- when I got here I realized I had no answers so that made me willing to at least hear you folks out and take some suggestions. theres nothing like pain to make me willing, but I have prayed for the willingness to be willing when I was trying to work on the steps. today I am more likely to be willing to go to any lengths than i used to be, because I didnt know what the lengths were back then and it still surprizes me sometimes today. there's nothing like a romantic relationship, which usually comes with a side order of miracle grow for character defects, to make me willing to do almost anything spiritual. before I worked on my coda issues, I was in fear and pain almost from the beginning which made me willing to write, pray and tackle the coda issues. It's nice to finally have some healthy boundaries and principles for my life because I was willing to do the work, this stuff pays off like the big book said it would. thanks for letting me share. Dear God please bless all who venture here. love and hugs, bon


Member: Bill H.
Location: Paradise,California
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 11:36:38

Comments

Bill H. here,alcoholic,sober by the grace of God,and WILLING by His grace to share with y'all today.Willingness perhaps the first mental action in surrender in my view.My experience came as a realization that I couldn't "lick" this on my own.Step one calls it powerlessness,I agree,in the war on alcoholism I'm a loser by myself.It took a higher power to give me the WILLINGNESS to recognize my utter defeat,this is grace at it's finest,unmerited favor,a gift from God that by my judgment,I wasn't worthy of.Of corse I'm merely agreeing with God on what's good for me.I have much to learn in this area,I judge myself very selfish,and in the past haven't made many good decisions, listening to my higher power hasn't been easy.I believe daily surrender is key to discovering our WILLINGNESS,and recognition of our higher power in our lives is vital to our daily recovery.May the peace of His understanding keep your minds and hearts today friends!Thanks for letting me share! I will be back God willing.


Member: Sandy K
Location: NJ
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 12:10:43

Comments

Hi everyone, Sandy alcoholic. Willingness was what I had when I came in. I was so beat up in everyway, I truly didn't know how to get out. Not really knowing if I was an alcoholic ( I thought I was crazy) I went to 90 meetings in 90 days. I was willing to do anything that was suggested to me to get rid of the pain. And it worked. For the first time in my life something worked. A true miracle. Being willing, open and honest, has changed my life. I have nothing but gratitude today. My sponsor said I took to AA like a duck to water. This was all handled by my Higher Power. Love to all of you and being willing is a true miracle.


Member: Pat W.
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 13:11:52

Comments

I am two days sober, and although I am willing, I truly don't know if I am able to stay on the road to sobriety. I want to attend a meeting, but have not had the courage to do it. I told my husband I wanted to go to AA and he said,"what if you know someone there? Won't people find out?" At this point, I don't care who knows that I'm an alcoholic. My kids know, and it is hurting them. My husband knows, but he won't admit it. I know and will admit it, but feel powerless over everything, not just alcohol. Thank goodness I found this site. At least for today, it is helping me.


Member: Ann G.A.
Location: DWG PA
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 13:19:35

Comments

Hi everyone ..I'm Ann, Alcoholic & Addict. Willingness came easier when the pain was the greatest. First few days,weeks & months of sobriety I was very willing, because I DON"T LIKE PAIN!!! Today I find it more difficult to become willing before the pain kicks my butt all over agin. I have made alittle progress thanks to AA & other members, sponsor, etc. The hardest area for me to become willing is when it comes to "Letting Go" of others or of situations which bring more pain. For ex. I fought & fought & prayed & prayed for the "willingness"to let go of my 19 yr old son who is now living in his addiction. The prayers, meetings and feedback from other helped to develop that willingness, & I have actually found some peace and serenity agian in focusing on myself. I saw a bumper sticker once that said "EVERTHING I EVER LET GO OF HAD SCRATCH MARKS ALL OVER IT" Praise to AA that I have become willing to stop scratching so much. thanks for the topic. Happy 24 to all!!


Member: Mary G.
Location: New Jersey
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 17:29:29

Comments

Hi my name is mary and I am an alcoholic.willingness is a wonderful topic. Once I became willing to accept that I was an alcoholic I was then willing to do whatever it took to get sober. I have to be willing every day to let go and let god or I know I will drink, maybe not today, but someday. Being willing to turn my life and my will over to my higher power is the hardest thing I do everyday, but it has helped to keep me sober for four years. One Day At A Time. Thank-You and God bless


Member: kathy k
Location: rochester, ny
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 17:54:30

Comments

good topic. when i came in i was willing but didn't know it. it took a few false starts for me to stay this time around. i have a few 24 hours but feel like a newcomer. maybe i'm a little more willing to work at sobriety harder.


Member: Kent H.
Location: TN
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 19:04:28

Comments

Hey, folks, this is Kent, a gratefully recovering alcoholic. Lots of good experience, strength, and hope on this topic. I can't add much, just that it took me a long time and a whole lotta pain before I became truly willing to go to any length. Thanks to all of you in AA for showing me the way. Pat W.- about your concern (or your husband's) that you will see someone you know at a meeting....so what? They are there for the same reason you are! Also, about the general fear that "people will find out" about your alcoholism....chances are that a lot more people already know than you realize. Help yourself by going to a meeting. Peace and Love to everyone out there....it's a great way of life, ain't it?


Member: Lauren
Location: md
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 20:24:15

Comments

hi everyone - lauren, alcoholic. I love this topic, because before coming to AA the idea of willingness was foreign to me.I was only willing to do things my way and, unlike Sinatra my life kept getting worse. Then i found the program and one of the first things i remember learning was to "follow directions" if i wanted aa to work for me the way it obviously did for others. The word "willing" was the key - first i had to be willing before i would actually take the suggestions offered. Like others, i was certainly willing to be rid of the pain and the mess i had made of my life - so why not WILLING to follow the suggestions in order for AA to work for me? So, out of pain I was willing to DO what was necessary - and it worked! And still does; thank you for participating in this truly aonymous AA meeting.


Member: Lauren
Location: md
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 20:25:46

Comments

hi everyone - lauren, alcoholic. I love this topic, because before coming to AA the idea of willingness was foreign to me.I was only willing to do things my way and, unlike Sinatra my life kept getting worse. Then i found the program and one of the first things i remember learning was to "follow directions" if i wanted aa to work for me the way it obviously did for others. The word "willing" was the key - first i had to be willing before i would actually take the suggestions offered. Like others, i was certainly willing to be rid of the pain and the mess i had made of my life - so why not WILLING to follow the suggestions in order for AA to work for me? So, out of pain I was willing to DO what was necessary - and it worked! And still does; thank you for participating in this truly aonymous AA meeting.


Member: Kyra H.
Location: Fairfax, Va
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 21:53:53

Comments

Hi! This is wonderful! I am sitting in my office doing school work and really needed to reach out tonight! I couldn'y hold a meeting in my office so, I looked for Alcoholics on the Web!! So all I need to say is THANK YOU for being here!


Member: Christine M.
Location: Bayville, NJ
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 22:16:11

Comments

Hi, My name is Christine and I am an alcoholic.

Willingness is a good topic. I wasn't willing to do much of anything when I first arrived at AA, NINE YEARS ago, sentenced thru the courts. I heard one thing at meetings that I WAS willing to do and that was "KEEP AN OPEN MIND". So, that in mind, I kept coming, disagreed with most of everything, refused to say the Lord's Prayer out of sheer rebelliousness, tried to keep an open mind and NINE years later have found that I have changed my opinions on just about everything.

If you do nothing else, a.) KEEP COMING and b.) TRY TO KEEP AND OPEN MIND many years later you may find that those things that you once disagreed with so vehemently, you now embrace. This program is about progress NOT perfection.

Love and Peace,

Christine M.


Member: Rachel F
Location: Edmonton  AB
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 23:26:02

Comments

Hi, my name is Rachel and it has been a couple of weeks since I went to a meeting so what a surprise to find that all I had to do was turn on my computer. This is wonderful. Willingness for me is the ability to put my ego aside and to face life on life's terms. I am someone who finds it particularly easy to be negative. I am like an insect that is attracted to fire--I too often get singed!! I have to strive to be positive every day. I must be willing to keep an open mind and to realize that my opinion and my feels are not the only ones that monopolize the interpretation of this vast universe. I am so grateful to be alive and to be sober however difficult life may be sometimes.


Member: Bill T.
Location: Eastern shore of Maryland
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 23:31:48

Comments

Sometimes, willing or not, we get hooked. I always remember coming home from a meeting where the topic was "surrender". My arrogance was such that even though I was many months sober at the time, I sat on the side of my bed with clenched fists proclaiming to myself that by God I still did not want to surrender. But I was indulging myself in self delusion because I had been willing to go to that meeting and to a good many other meetings before that one. Like it or not, by the repitition of going to meetings night after night - having been willing to do it over and over - AA had hooked me. I didn't get it, it got me. That was many many years ago and I thank God that he/she rendered me willing.


Member: grandma-mary
Location: seattle
Date: 29 Sep 1998
Time: 23:57:21

Comments

Hi everyne - I'm an alkie and my name is Mary. Great topic and lots of good things said. To Pat W. in Milwaulkee - My 2nd ot 3rd meeting I looked up and found myself right behind the parents of my youngest osn's best friend. And my thought was exactly the same as your husband's..."o my gosh - they'll know why I'm here and tell everybody, etc." It took awhile for the fog to clear enough for me to realize that THEY WERE THERE FOR THE SAME REASON I WAS - THEY WERE BOTH ALCOHOLIC ALSO! Silly me! Today I know that my presence in an AA meeting is as confidential as anything I counld do in this world. If you go to what we call a "closed meeting", everyone there will be there because of a problem with alcohol, and they aren't about to go shouting your name on the streets 'cause someone might ask how it is that they saw you at a meeting! Please go to a meeting - this on-line stuff is great and fun, but nothing beats face-to-face talk with another who walks in your shoes. Email me if you like at grandma-mary@webtv.net. God bless all who walk this path.


Member: Jan M.
Location: Fife WA
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 00:07:04

Comments

Hi, everyone. My name is Jan, and I am an alcoholic!

Great topic and comments. My first on-line meeting, but God willing, not my last.

Willingness really is the key to continued sobriety. Nothing works unless I take the steps to make it work, and I have to be willing to do that. When I'm not, it self-will run riot, and all I know is that's what got me to A.A. in the beginning. Now, almost 13 years later, I continue to be willing.

I thank God for this program of recovery. It has restored me and my family to sanity when nothing else worked. And I thank all of you for staying sober and coming back.

Peace.


Member: Mark Wright
Location: Virginia
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 00:32:35

Comments

Hi, my name is Mark. I don't want to lie to you all and call my self an alcholic. I don't think I am. BUT the courts and now my court subcribed 'shrink' tells me I am.

Here is the story....

I've been drinking beer.... not liqour, for the past ten years.... When I got married in 1993 She knew the amount I was drinking.

We had 2 kids together, a boy that is now 2, and a girl 5. Plus a stepdaughter from her previous marriage that is 11.

I was drinking anywhere from 6-18 beers a night, everynight.... Not a good role model 'eh

But my kids loved me... My wife didn't.

She started screwing around and let me know about it....

One night after about 16 beers, she came home late... She told me about the great sex she had just had with another amn and I snaped.

ALL I DID was grab her by her shoulders and shove her a few times. NEVER HIT HER!!!! But non the less I got charged and convicted of spousal assault and battery... under the influence no dobt.

Well, I am now serving weekends in the city jail, paying her and my lawyer out the ass... Sorry but it all seems like bulshit to me.

A little more insite on me... I have 4 DUI's and am declaired a habitutual offender... granted aclohol has ruined alot of my life, but that was when I was younger.

I'm required by the courts to go to AA meetings, but I dont want to lie to the people. YES I am trying (and have kinda) stayed sober to a point.... but when my probation ends... I plan on resuming life as it was.... I have more fun taking the ladies out to the dance bars (Even though I cant dance a lick) but having a few drinks with them both relaxes me and them,,, Kinda ice breaker... Working well so far except for the fact I'm lying both to my councelor and Probation Officer..... It's gonna catch up with me....

Don't know if any of ya can relate but if ya can on a personal level.... I need moral support.... buper72@hotmail.com is a direct link to me... Thanks, yet I'm sure my mail box will be empty...

Don't get me wrong.... I'm not suicidal.... Just like to drink and not willing to admit I have a problem nor trying to correct one if I do.... I am 26 years old... and Immortal!! hehe

Love you all, You have more strength than I do Keep up the fight Tag me some time

Mark Wright buper72@hotmail.com


Member: Larry W.
Location: Louisiana
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 03:13:14

Comments

Hello All,

My name is Larry and I am a somewhat reluctant alcoholic. I was once a regular at AA meetings in Germany but I have not been to a meeting in nearly 2 years since moving back to the U.S.. How am I doing? I'm living a lie.I've always thought of alcoholics as the worlds best liars.I mean we lie to ourselves daily about our addictions and we actually believe it. If you can make yourself believe your own lies then it's not a problem making others believe them, unless of course your talking to other alcoholics. They are wonder- fuly direct and seldom buy into the B.S.

I remember the first AA meeting that I attended. The one thing that effected me more than anything else was the geniune concern and love everyone in the group seemed to generate. I suppose that is what I miss most.

I see that todays topic of discussion is willingness. I can certainly relate to that. Although I have'nt drank on a regular basis since I started attending AA almost 4 years ago, this is not to say that I don't want to. In fact, everytime I a get an opportunity to get away from home for an extended period of time it's what dominates my thoughts. This is why the willingness to change is so important. I must admit that the one thing that keeps me from drinking more than anything is the fear of losing my wife and children. Not to mention a a possibly severe impact on my career, I'm a cop. But this is the awesome power of alcohol. With all of the stupid things I've done and all I stand to lose, I still want a drink.

I guess until I have the willingness to change for myself then I'll never have this thing licked. Well thanks for giving me a place to vent and preach. I Love you all. AA and the people who make it have probably done more for me than anything or anyone else. I'll be back!!

P.S. Mark, your on the right track, If you were'nt you would not have found your way to this site.


Member: Bob F
Location: Springfield, Oregon
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 05:04:51

Comments

Hi all. I'm Bob, an alky For me willingness was a bootstrap process. I had to become willing to become willing. The honesty openmindedness and willingness that are so indespensable, (HOW) in appendix B, wasn't there for me early on. I had to fake it till I could make it. The very act of faking it was an expression of willingness, though. Now I like to think of it as a self perpetuating process. I am more than willing to go to any lengths to use it as a tool to maintain my sobriety. Fake it till you make it then be willing to go to any lengths to keep it. Thank you all for listening to my rambling. Maybe it will do someone some good. It did me good to say it. Lotsa AA love to all of you...


Member: Diane
Location: NorthWest Hills of CT
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 08:24:36

Comments

Hello Everyone! I'm Diane, a grateful alcoholic, sobriety 4/11/98.

Thanks for this topic Frank! And thank you all for the excellent shares above!

WILLINGNESS: "disposed or inclined; prepared; acting or ready to act gladly; eagerly compliant; done, given, accepted; borne voluntarily or ungrudgingly".

After reading all your shares I wasn't sure what more I could possibly add. Then I read your post Mark, and AA's Step One came to mind instantly: "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol -- that our lives had become unmanageable." WE HAVE TO BE WILLING TO ACCEPT THAT STEP! That's where it all starts... The willingness to say I AM AN ALCOHOLIC!

Thank you for letting me share today!

To Larry P: Please come to the CoffeePot.


Member: BRIAN H
Location: RAPID CITY S. D.
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 11:25:21

Comments

HELLO, I'M BRIAN AND I AM A ALCOHOLIC My first six months of sobriety were in the county jail. during that six months I attended four meetings a week with the help of my sponser. Then they cut me loose,I asked my probation officer what my terms of probation were, he said NONE we're not placing you under any conditions of probation your totaling free to do what you want(INCLUDING DRINKING)but something happened during that six months and attending those meetings, I accepted I am a alcohlic, deep down in my gut(my inner most self)and I had the WANT TO to stay sober and I still have THE WANT TO nearly eight years later(one day at a time) thank you and God for the honesty and WIIIINGNESS(THE WANT TO) GOD BLESS.


Member: Yvonne
Location: Chicago - Go Cubs
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 16:17:28

Comments

Hi, my name is Yvonne and I'm a recovering alcoholic. For me having the willingness was/is the first piece of the sobriety puzzle. With that, all else falls into place gradually. I hear friends all the time tell me how they are starting diets, starting exercise programs, starting to quit smoking, whatever,the success rate is not very good. I know from my own experience, unless I have the willingess to truly get a change in my life it is simply not going to happen. As humans we love that powerful immediate gratification. Life would be grand if we had a simpler, easier way to do a lot of things, but that is not always the case. So often we go thru' life desiring change but are not willing to take the necessary steps to have that change happen. It truly is the key to sobriety. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Steve D
Location: NJ
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 17:12:58

Comments

Hi everybody. I'm Steve, powerless over alcohol.

Willingnes is for me the third letter of HOW: Honest Open Willing. These three letters were what I was told told to do with myself in order to stay sober (not just dry) within the program. And, like the steps I was told that the letters must be done in order. So that by the time I came to Willingness, I had already accepted and was living Honestly and Open (to suggestions on how to live sober). This made it possible to embrace Willingness.

I saw, and continue to see, that the people most "successful" in the program are those who go to meetings, don't drink and help others. By successful, I mean (and this is only my definition): sober, at peace with themselves, working the steps and reaching out to others. These people have what I want and I become willing to do anything (anything!) to get the same thing.

Two of the greatest threats to my sobriety are resentments and controversy. I was told that if I have the time to argue with people and hold resentments (or actively seek to get back at someone) then I have too much time on my hands. I am not properly working the program. Someone out there is not being helped in the time that I am wasting with controversy and resentment. Worse, someone is being discouraged from seeking help from AA if they see that people who reach out are not tended to, that people are ignored and bitterness is created by needless controversy (my program/interpretation of literature/length of time is better/easier/longer than someone else's).

If I have a desire to stop drinking, then I am responsible for being there for the next person. That creates the willingness on their part to be there for me when I need help.

Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Marie P
Location: Canada
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 17:44:08

Comments

Hi, My name is Marie and I'm an alcoholic. I'm a little confused right now. I was and am willing to stay sober but I feel like people don't really think I need the help. I know in my own mind that I'm willing to do anything I'm just not sure if I'm doing all the right things. Sometimes I think I'm not doing enough. I go to meetings at least three times a week, I'm reading the BIG BOOK maybe I'm just really new at this and I need to be willinging to be patient. Any comments or helpful ideas would be appreciated.


Member: Frank W
Location: Georgia
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 19:14:22

Comments

I am Frank W an alcoholic. Today after years of sobriety I reaized that I was planning a drunk. I have been on a dry drunk for at least a week if not longer. I am willing to accept the fact that with all I have learned And all I have expererienced I must be on guard at all times. I received a lot tough love today at a meeting and I must now start working my program as if I had not done a thing in years. Dry/sober? I know that if I did not have AA I would be out committing suicide, either with a bottle or a gun. I thank my higher power for the fellowship of AA and the hard and soft love that is here.


Member: Ana María O.
Location: Perú
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 19:46:33

Comments

hi ! my name is Ana María and I am an alcoholic. I'm so glad I found this meeting online, first time for me, I'm starting to learn about Internet and all that stuff - difficult! but I want to believe, not impossible ... I live in Lima, Perú and thanks to my Higher Power this coming Monday October 5th I'll celebrate 12 yrs. of WILLINGNESS to accept my alcoholism, my own person and my reality.


Member: dj
Location: norfolk
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 19:49:38

Comments

hi all.alki here marie p if you pray dont worry !! just dont leave with out your !!miracle !! keep comeing back god bless


Member: Jennifer S
Location: Western New York
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 20:10:13

Comments

Ann G. A. - As I was reading thru, I knew exactly what I wanted to share on this topic. Then I got to your comments. Almost exactly what I was thinking! I never seem to be alone around here. Today I am not only willing to be and share with others... I kinda like it too. It's the stuff I don't like where willingness seems like a mountain to climb. Good thing I have a closet full of boots. The good strong kind you find at meetings.


Member: JOHN W
Location: MARYLAND
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 20:54:56

Comments

HI I'M JOHN I am a alcholic ihave the willingness but not the brains to do what keeps me sober until after i,ve screwed up but i,ll keep coming back to get it right JOHN W


Member: Bill W
Location: Nova Scotia, Canada
Date: 30 Sep 1998
Time: 23:50:39

Comments

Morning friends, Bill, alcoholic. In my early sobriety the AA programme meant little or nothing but I was able to do Step 1. Then one of the topics one night was willingness. So became willing to try this programme. Here it is mant 24hours later and I'm still willing and still learning. All those who participate here help me. Pat W, please go to that AA meeting and never mind what others think. You will benefit 100%. Larry W. Keep going to those meetings. If you don't have a sponsor please get one. Marie P A sponsor or just another member can help greatly. I attended a meeting one night and the speakewr was my sponsor. I had never heard him speak before but he told my story. Am I ever fortunate as it has made the world of difference. God Bless all.


Member: Scott R
Location: Yosu, Korea
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 04:28:26

Comments

I'm Scott and an alcoholic. It's funny that I was just thinking about willingness yesterday. I became willing to stop drinking and then a miricale happened...I did and haven't drank since that moment when I became willing. Now, however, I find that I lack willingness in other areeas of my life. I have not worked on being willing to change some things that continue to impact my life...character defects of course. I know that when I find that willingness another miracle will occur in my life and it's all thanks to AA...that's the real miracle. I'm willing to believe that. Thanks for the chance to share.


Member: Terry, B
Location:
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 07:17:19

Comments

My name is Terry and I'm an alcoholic. I'm trying to regain the willingness to stay sober again. As I sit here with a hangover I try to list the reasons I originally joined AA. May god give me the willingness to find my way back to sobriety.


Member: Kyra H.
Location: Virginia
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 10:19:59

Comments

Hi! My name is Kyra and I am an alcoholic. By the grace of God I have been sober for 13 months today. Willingness is a great topic! I have a problem with being 100% willing, I can do about 70% maybe 80%, but I'm scared to be 100%. And last night when I was at a step meeting (we went over the 4th step) someone told me that all you need to be is willing to be willing. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone but it really helped me out. I am 21, I'll be 22 in a month, when I first came into the program I thought that now that I was sober I had to be perfect. I had to now be Wonder Women. Be nice, kind, loving, like everyone, etc. You know. And I have been so wraped up in that, that I forgot what I was doing here! I have a drinking problem. When I pick up a drink all hell breaks lose. But life was always there and people were always being people. I need to live life on life's terms. God will watch out for me. I am so willing to do the next right thing, and right now that's all. I continue to go to a meeting daily, I read, work on steps, and call my sponcer. This program is wonderful! 13 months ago I had no clue what the word willingness was. And now I have a second chance at life. God put me and you all here for reason! For any one who is not sure if this is what they want....it's called FREEDOM...keep coming back!!! Please feel free to email me: khawn@osf1.gmu.edu

I am greatful to be an alcoholic today, thank you for letting me share!


Member: Dennis J
Location: NewYork
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 15:21:35

Comments

Hi, My name is Dennis and I'm an alcoholic.I think willingness is one of the first steps we need to focus on in our recovery.It is one of the main ingrediences to help us move foward.Sobriety is free willingness is a sacrafice,without both were are dommed to a predictable fate.


Member: Paul J.
Location: Eldon, missouri
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 20:59:48

Comments

Hi! I am Paul and I am alcoholic. Today I am working on willingness to except that a am a real alcoholic. I have went through many years of misery, not only for me but all around me. Today I have give up and smashed the idea that I can drink and get away with it. I have become willing to do anything to re-gain my soberity. I will be 50 in November and I probably really have never been sober since my early teenage years. I give up and am going to let God do for me what I can not do for myself. One day at a time.


Member: Lora S.
Location: Effingham,Il.
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 21:09:30

Comments

Hi, I'm Lora, and a grateful alcoholic. Willingness is one of my favorite topics, thanks Frank. When I finnaly became willing to admit that I am an alcoholic and took the first step to go into my very first closed meeting, I was afraid that I would run into my Dad who had been on the program for about ten years at that time. My friend said so what if he is there who are you going for--Charlie or Lora??Thank God I was able to honestly answer that I was going for myself. That"s been several 24 hours ago now, and the only times I really get the stinkin thinking is when I loose sight of the fact that I must remain willing to go to any length to stay sober and to help others wherever I can--anything from washing walls with a pigeon to making coffee whatever it takes, to keep me onm the right path. We just got the internet, and I"m so grateful that I decided to look for other alkies who are having a meeting. Super cool. If anyone had told me back in 72 that someday I would not only still be sober, but attending ameeting via computer, I'd have told them they were nuts. Thanks for being here, and thanks for allowing me to comment---I'll be back Lora at gkslds@mmtcnet.com


Member: Paul Q
Location: Toronto, ON Canada
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 22:01:03

Comments

Its all about willingness........

We become what we think about......

If I'm not willing to go get it its never going to come to me.............

Thanks for your comments typical of us self centered people......going on and on with lengthy comments....


Member: Christine M.
Location: Bayville, NJ
Date: 01 Oct 1998
Time: 22:49:20

Comments

Paul,

Its called sharing.

It's what we do here in AA.

Take your attacking, smartass comments somewhere else.


Member: Larry W
Location: Louisiana
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 09:32:44

Comments

Bravo Christine, I like you, you've got HEART!


Member: dee m.
Location: Sudbury, Ont. Ca.
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 10:49:19

Comments


Member: Dee M.
Location: Sudbury, Ont. Ca.
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 10:57:16

Comments

Hi my name is Dee and I'm an alcoholic. This is my first time sharing on the internet and I'm a little nervous, but not half as nervous when I try to share at a meeting full of people. I've been around the tables of A.A. for over a year now. But I haven't been sober all this time. Right now, I have almost two months in. Willingness is one of the keys to my sobriety. I have to be willing to go to any lenghts to stay sober; as well, I have to go to be willing to go to any lenghts to let God give me a hand. That's it for to-day...Everyone have a great 24 hours.


Member: miltp
Location: Minnesota
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 11:58:19

Comments

I have a very serious question regarding the 12th tradition and gambling being aloud within an alano club. It seems as if the president of our alano club is wanting gambling to go on, and when someone checked with our state gambling committee, they said that without a permit that our club would be in serious trouble. the person who checked this all out wrote a letter to the president of the club, and now the truth is being twisted and their name is being said throughout the club. First off, where does the World Wide service Center stand on illegal gambling within an alano club, and secondly doesn't the alano club itself have to follow the 12th tradition in regards to ananimity? It seems to me that they are not trusted servents with the club being placed in perle. Please advise asap.

miltrp@aol.com


Member: Lisa C.
Location: NB Canada
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 13:15:20

Comments

Willingness. I've noticed lately just how stubborn I can be and how I think my way is the right way and that I know how everyone else should behave.

Just for today I'm looking at myself as a "bending" tree, not as a rigid rock. Being un-willing to give up self with others (leaving me angry and defensive) makes for a bad day for me and I'm the only one I can change (with the Higher Power's help)in this world.


Member: Michael H.
Location: Orlando, Florida
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 15:02:56

Comments

Hello Family.... I'm Michael, I'm cross addicted. In "the Program", I think that willingness is the key to sobriety, yes. But, I think the willingness to abstain from alcohol is not enough. You must also be willing to be honest, to empty your soul to another and face those "Demons" that put the bottle in your hand in the first place. And, the things the "Demons" had you do while you were influenced.


Member: DJ
Location: NORFOLK
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 16:09:14

Comments

HI ALKIE HERE

GAMBLING IN A ALANO CLUB IS STOPED LIKE A DRUNK DRIVER AFTER

REASONING FAILES CALL POLICE


Member: shelby r
Location: new york
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 16:32:17

Comments

a lot of gratitude for having this. gratitude for all the sharing and the love' and i need the love and so as always i received what i needed.thank you god for everything.


Member: Ron
Location: S|%)
Date: 02 Oct 1998
Time: 17:19:31

Comments

Hi everyone, Ron S|%), alcoholic here

I am very grateful to be alive, well and sober today.

They say that if you don't think that you are an alcoholic, then try anither round of drinking, keeping in mind what we (AA) have told you about alcoholisim. Well, I did that after 14 months of sobriety and after 3 weeks of drinking, I decided to come back to AA and start over. I was determinded to find the truth and do what I had to. I also realized that I didn't have the smallest amount of willingness to do anything!! I finally decided that I would obtain the willingness if I just started coming to meetings. So I did and three days later I stopped drinking and told the group what I was up to. That day was 9/14/91 and I am still sober today. I often wonder why I received the willingness and not some of the other that I have seen here and are now back out. I beleive that willingness is the gift of desperation and some folks are just not desperate enough, yet. Desperation, I also believe, is an individual thing. Some people lose everything and still will not accept their fate, while others, myself included, just begin to lose things and have had enought. For those of you who dought your alcoholism, the door to AA is always open.

God bless to all Go for "Another 24 Hours" Ron S|%)


Member: C Grebso
Location: Washington
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 00:42:34

Comments

I am an alcoholic, 10 months sober. I am having a difficult time, because I know what I need to do to stay sober, but I don't have the guts to do it! I'm afraid of people, that's why I drank. I go to meetings, I'm willing to try. And what I've been doing so far has kept me sober, but I am beginning to feel I need more. I need AA friends in my life. I need a sponsor that I can connect with, and that's not happening with the sponsor I have. I'm afraid. I want to stay sober. I need God to give me courage to reach out.


Member: tony g
Location: ma
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 01:40:33

Comments

tony alcoholic,hey c hold on to your boot straps it will pass and get to meetings,talk to people!as far as my willingness is concerned,yes,im very willing to learn a new way to live,love and feel,i have to be willing to believe in this program its got proven results going back to the 1920,s im willing to do what is said everyday.other alcoholics,my higher power and me,its working. God bless


Member: Craig D.
Location: UTOPIA
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 02:38:55

Comments

One day at a time. Get a sponsor, work the steps, make meetings. Oh, Craig D., Alcoholic / Addict.


Member: brad w
Location: New Zealand
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 03:28:22

Comments

Hi, my name is brad and I am an alcoholic. Hey C., I'm 10 months sober too. I have had tough times, and expect a few more, but things are slowly getting better. 10 months ago I woke up in a police cell, I,m writing this from my flat and feel content at the slow changes that are occuring. For me the important willingness is to say thanks. If I say a thanks in my heart to my higher power, and take time to ponder the good things that have happened today then I feel like my head and heart are in the right place. best, brad.


Member: Lora S.
Location: Effingham,IL.
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 03:30:06

Comments

I'm back again, just thought I'd see if there were any new postings since I went off line earlier. Why is it that we alkies seem to fear so much?? Well, through the grace of God and the people around the tables I've learned to replace fear with faith--at least most of the time. When I first came into the AA program, I was so afraid--of everything and everybody that I put up a really good (bad) defense, I was so foul mouthed and so full of anger that noone wanted anything to do with me. I felt like I was alone in a room full of people, I felt like there was a hole in my gut with the wind blowing through, and of course I felt like NO ONE could ever be as bad as I was.. Well, by the time I'd done 120 in 120 days,Some guy kept saying things like if I like you and you don't, one of us is wron---check it out!! Being a really hard headed person (maybe thats thick headed) it wook me a few weeks to get a clue that the guy was tellling me that I was worth liking, and that I needed to learn to like me so that I could like others and vice versa. So i started changing the gal in the glass (me) and changing people, places and things, and loe and behold I started actually growing. Sorry I rambled on. Hang in there c, and don't let the judge in the back of your own head get you down--you're a winner, and like I 've been told bunches--stick with the winners. Love and warm fuzzies (hugs) to all and to all keep coming back. Lora--alkie


Member: chris c
Location: cal
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 03:30:54

Comments

Thank you all for your words and hope.


Member: Teri
Location:
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 07:42:09

Comments

Hi all. I'm an alcoholic and my name is Teri. I'm very grateful to be sober today and have asked God to give me the strength to stay that way for another 24 hrs. Today I know that in order for me to stay sober, one day at a time, I have to be willing to do the things I need to do to help myself. If I'm willing to do that, God will take care of the rest. So far, it has worked well!

Paul, you stated my feelings very simply and eloquently--thank you. And I could really relate to your comment about "comments typical of us self-centered people", "going on and on with lengthy comments". you described me perfectly!!! LOL!

When I first got sober, I used to think (and still do at times) that it was all about me! If someone said something I didn't like I'd go into a complete and total rage. If people went on and on about what "I" thought was stupid and petty stuff, I'd stuff that cotton deeper in my ears. I'd whine and moan to anyone who would listen about who said what to whom, and really get self righteous and indignant when I took offense at people's comments in meetings. And believe me, I was offended alot because, as I stated before, it was all about me! Just thinking about all that anger and resentment that I used to harbor makes me tired!

My sponsor (Gods bless her patient and tolerant soul), was just awful too. When I would rant and rave about this person and that person, she would just look at me and say, "well, whatever". Then she would send me back to the Big Book to read some really dumb stuff that didn't relate to me at all. LOL.

Today, and this is just my experience as it relates to my recovery, I have learned that I have to be willing to accept life on life's terms, and people, places, things, and situations, for exactly what they are. I don't have to react to things people say that I don't agree with. I can let them be who they are and say what they need to say. I was told early on that there are lessons to be learned in any and every situation in life if I am willing to listen, keep an open mind, and remain teachable. The minute I think I know it all, I'll be drunk.

Thanks for letting me share. Hope we all "keep coming back". Like it or not, we ALL need each other!


Member: Norm P.
Location: Indiana
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 13:17:09

Comments

"If you want what we have and are willing to go to any lengths to get it-then you are ready to take certain steps". This tells me I'm not even ready for the first step unless I can answer those questions. Everybody(almost) in A.A. is sober;that's what I want. "Alcohol beat me into a state of reasonableness" so I was willing. I had surrended and didn't even know it! I was willing to do anything not to drink again. One day at a time,ten years have passed. Who says God doesn't do miracles anymore? I've missed all of you on this site. My cp threw up and I switched providers and now believe that may have been the problem. I've lost all the addresses I had as I had to reinstall everything from scratch. The new provider is on a 30 day trial basis; if this doesn't work,I'll have to get off the net so I'm not giving out my new address until I'm sure there will be no more problems.Good to hear from you,Paul, in Wolcot- ville..maybe we'll e-mail later.


Member: Eric H .
Location: Harbor Island group, N.Y.
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 13:34:38

Comments

Hi,

Eric Alkie.

It was because I wasn't willing to let go absolutely that I didn't get sober when I first came to the rooms. Finally my higher power took away the drinking problem in 1990 but didn't remove my thinking problem. It took a horrible dry period where I continued to go to meetings and carry the message but conveniently excused myself from the middle ten steps to finally end the charade. I was relieved when I read in the 12 and 12, 12th step, where it talks about two-stepping, that someone had gone through the same thing and had written about it in our literature. That is when I surrendered to the solution and not the problem. It is such a wonderful life that my higher power has given me, and I love the work today. It takes some kind of willingness to post a message here, and I really pray that those struggling with the disease give up the battle and surrender. I believe today that the disease of alcoholism is more powerful than I am so I ask for help, from God and from others in recovery. I try to learn from everyone in and out of the rooms. My life is a gift, I was on the way out, dying inside and out. I don't want to see the inside of a cell again, or a locked ward, or the back seat of a police car. I don't want to help close the bar down, I don't want to see my family get a court order of protection against me again. I don't miss the hangovers or the guilt of spending my bill money. I don't drink my check away and have to borrow more to drink tomorrow. This is my track record, leaving out many details. It is what I have to look forward to if I think I can have one drink again. I want to see what I can do with God's help in my life, see where God will bring me. I love the ride usually, mostly. I keep it real simple. I keep taking my own inventory. I pray only for the knowledge of God's will for me and the power to carry it out. I try to live a spiritual existence, practice these priciples in all my affairs, and carry the message to those still suffering. A lot of times that's still me, and I have you to help me. All who share here or anywhere in the rooms are carrying the message. Twelth step work is the key to my continued sobriety. Thank you God for all my gifts today.

Eric H.


Member: Susan J
Location: St Petersburg, FL
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 16:49:25

Comments

Willingness is a definite must. I had to be willing to change everything about me. What I had done before hadn't worked so I had to learn to be willing with the help of my sponcer and working the steps. I have some time in AA but it still remains that I need to be willing. I need to be willing to let God control my life and to live each day, one day at a time. I have recently been fired from a job that took up too much time away from AA. I had no time to go to meetings and I didn't talk to my sponcer. I am so glad AA is here for me. I am back going to more meetings and I am so much happier and serene. God did for me what I could not do for myself. I am in St Petersburg, Fl and I am again active in my home group. Yes willingness is one of the most important things for any alcoholic. Susu46@hotmail.com


Member: Howard M.
Location: Arizona
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 18:57:03

Comments

Howard, alcoholic

I have always been willing. It's the action part I have difficulty with.


Member: Jeff Wilson
Location: Pittsburgh PA
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 20:14:26

Comments

Evening everybody! I'm Jeff, and I'm an alcoholic. Every day I have to do things I don't want to do. Sobriety is one of the things I must do to keep all of those other things, that I don't want to do. I have been given a wonderful opertunity, a new way, a new life, and I will not give that up. Catie from M'twn, WV good to here from yunz. tell every one I said Hey! THANKS for my Sobriety! kangi68@aol


Member: Maggie M
Location: Rochester,NY
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 20:19:59

Comments

hi my name is margie and im an alcoholic. this my first time on the net and this is very coolim feeling very complacent lately. Not really wanting to to meetings or do what I know is healthy for me.Willingness is the key.I have to pray for god to give me the willingness ineed and the strength i need to stay sober one more day.Sometimes the meetings get boring and I think that people are so full of it but it's what I see in me is why I feel that way. I have to check my motives everyday and do the tenth step on a regular basis to know when I'm being honest and when I'm not. Thanks for letting me share .I'f anyone has anything to say I would be grateful.Thanks Maggie from Rochester NY.


Member: Maggie M
Location: Rochester,NY
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 20:20:31

Comments

hi my name is margie and im an alcoholic. this my first time on the net and this is very coolim feeling very complacent lately. Not really wanting to to meetings or do what I know is healthy for me.Willingness is the key.I have to pray for god to give me the willingness ineed and the strength i need to stay sober one more day.Sometimes the meetings get boring and I think that people are so full of it but it's what I see in me is why I feel that way. I have to check my motives everyday and do the tenth step on a regular basis to know when I'm being honest and when I'm not. Thanks for letting me share .I'f anyone has anything to say I would be grateful.Thanks Maggie from Rochester NY.


Member: Kristin T.
Location: Marina, CA
Date: 03 Oct 1998
Time: 20:57:20

Comments

When I first got sober I was real willing. then right around 3 I got a little rebelious. Now after just truning 11 I am once again real willing to do whatever it takes to stay sober. And by the grace of god I am Sober today.