Member: Christa
Location: USA
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 11:33:00

Comments

Obviously a lot of people drink alcohol because it makes them feel good or more at ease. What alternatives to alcohol have people found? I personally like to brew a pot of tea and enjoy it while chatting on the computer. Unfortunately, I also noticed that I smoke more since I gave up drinking. Thought this may be a good topic for all of us looking for something else to "take" instead of alcohol.


Member: Gary
Location: Illinois
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 12:22:30

Comments

Hi Gary Alcoholic 43 Days sober I am drinking alot of Ice tea and pepsi. I need to start drinking more water. I never went to the bars for the beer I could get beer anywhere. I went to find the friends and the girls and found mostly beer. I like the topic and am looking for more alternatives. Thanks I will listen now


Member: Clint B
Location: Germany
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 12:42:46

Comments

My alternative to drinking is an AA meeting!! On Wednesdays we head out to an after meeting Italian ice cream shop and eat spaghetti ice cream and LOTS of cappicino.BOING...out pop the eyeballs! Smoking has always been with me. I am still working on my addiction to alcohol. Some day I will surrender to nicotine but first things first!


Member: Leslie H
Location: California
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 13:16:28

Comments

I try not to think of it as looking for alternatives to alcohol because that keeps me searching on the outside for what ails me when I know it's an inside job. But i don't do this sober thing perfectly--I relate very much to cross addiction. When i got sober I turned to ice cream. It gave me great comfort--something I always sought, but never quite secured, while drinking. And while I've never crashed my car or gotten arrested for binging on ice cream it is still an obsession or a compulsion that I've struggled with. I eat ice cream like I drank--alcohically. I can eat tons of it every night, I think about it during day, I have to make sure I have plenty on hand and I eat it ALONE! There is no moderation for me. I can do a lot of things to excess if I allow it. So for me right now I cannot have ice cream at all. I have to obstain. It's hard cause it's like giving up yet another crutch or comfort zone. But I fear that eating ice cream compulsively/alcoholically is just setting up my next drink. I think it through and realize I don't want to go there. And I go to a meeting instead. Or I pray or write about it. I don't find sobriety boring at all. i really enjoy the freedom from addiction and most of the time don't feel like I want to "take" anything but I do want to get out of my feelings sometimes. But if I just endure it it passes. I get my real "highs" on freedom and spirituality. It takes effort but it is so worth it.


Member: Rick S.
Location: B.C. NV
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 13:18:13

Comments

Hi, I'm rick and I am still an alcoholic. When I quit drinking I should have bought stock in the Lipton Tea Co.!!! But that was to take care of my empty hands...not my empty soul. I have come to understand, in a few 24 hours, that my drinking is but a symptom of this desease. For me "I am not an alcoholic because I drank to much...I drank to much because I am alcoholic!" If you are new that may not make much sense to you, but it will over time. Most of us hung out in bars to socialize, so now where do you do that? In meetings, or AA clubs. When you first get here we tell you to give up all your play things, playmates, and playgrounds. You need to find new ones, the only SAFE place (at first) for an alcoholic to find these is meetings and AA clubs. Also something we tend to forget about is the sugar aspect of alcohol. When you wquit drinking your body goes into a sugar defeciency, you need to replace that with fruit juice and any other thing you like. I carried a bag of bite size snickers bars for 3 months!! Thanks for your time...Seee Yaaa !!!


Member: Ken  L.
Location: Auburn, N.Y.
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 13:20:47

Comments

Hi,Ken,alcoholic,for me the only alternative to drinking is working on a program of recovery.I need to stay green. I have to affirm that I have a disease that keeps telling me that I don't have one.I stopped going to meetings and the result was that I forgot that I'm an alcoholic.It scares me to realize how cunning and powerfull this disease is.I'm grateful to have the opportuniy to be here today. Ken L.


Member: Joel H.
Location: Sandhills, N.C.
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 13:56:08

Comments

I'm Joel, an alcoholic. I can relate to everybody. I was empty in just about every way when I came back to AA. I was mostly concerned with myself, my resentments, my self-pity, and all my garbage. I still am, but not as bad. When I first came back, I found I had a lot of energy that needed to go somewhere. I tried to use it positively in a lot of different ways. I wasn't much of a coffee drinker, but turned into one! I had to cut down on the caffeine also. I enjoy some good ice cream too, good food, movies, mowing grass, and the good company of fellow trudgers. I have so much to be grateful for that I often take it for granted. I have been given another chance at life. What I choose to do with that life, try and live the steps and principles, or drink again, is up to me. But I have to tell you, I'd rather be sober and slowly making progress than being alone, afraid, and just completely lost in the bottle and drugs. So, pour me another cup, give me another bowl of ice cream, smoke 'em if you got 'em, but dear God please help me stay sober today... Thanks folks!


Member: Snow Y
Location: New Zealand
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 15:28:08

Comments

Hi. I'm Snow and I'm an alcoholic. Sorry if this doesn't fit the theme of the meeting but it's a call for some help. I've been dry for four months now but this doesn't concern me. It's regarding my 85 year old dad who has been dry for 51 years but is going through a rough patch at the moment. Eight months ago he had his first major surgery and since then has been severely depressed due to the post surgery drugs (morphine & antibiotics)- bad news to most alcoholics! This is a help call for any alcoholics who have experienced or who have knowledge of such circumstances, ie. alcoholics dealing with medication after surgery, etc. At the moment, he (Murdoch Y) is off medication and is trying St Johns Wort which looks hopeful but we would value any shared experiences of similar situations which could help with our fellow old timer. My email address is snowy@paradise.net.nz


Member: Robbie C.
Location: peterboro
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 15:50:51

Comments

i don't look for alternatived for alcohol or its association with bars loneliness sickness and lousy days of guilt remorse rationalizations fear and anxiety . But i did tumble into excessive ice cream to a degree that my health became worse than when i was Drinking. ended up in a hospital with severe angina feeling like an irresposible ass. Conccepts such as easy does it,or moderation seem beyond my ability to sustainin any meaningful fashion. And friends in A.A. tend to minimize it as "well it's much better than drinking" not really when it results in serious health problems.Any advice on how to control this addiction


Member: dj
Location: norfolk
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 16:30:42

Comments

dj alkie here, before i ever had a drop of the devels pee quit the unluckys too. (the american indians pay back tobacco) back tobacco) sign me big gut god bless dj


Member: Pattw/2tees
Location: Oregon
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 17:25:17

Comments

Howdy-do, all, alcoholic Pattw/2tees. At first, when I was newly sober, I drank a lot of juice, water, pop, almost anything non-alcoholic, with lots of ice. The cold seemed to help a lot. I had been relieved of the obsession to drink (for today), but still became hideously thirsty, so carrying around some liquid with me really helped. If you want some good tips, besides the ones posted here, there's a little book called, "Living Sober," which has some great suggestions for just that. Something sweet can help, too. Just hang in there, get your bottle of non-alcoholic juice, get to a meeting ASAP, and share what you're going through. We've all been through it and know just what you're talking about. Don't get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, or (my addition) Thirsty.

Thank God for sobriety and all you fellow trudgers on the Road to Happy Destiny. I couldn't be doing it without you.

Happy Sunday! Patt


Member: Pattw/2tees
Location: Oregon
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 17:26:01

Comments

Howdy-do, all, alcoholic Pattw/2tees. At first, when I was newly sober, I drank a lot of juice, water, pop, almost anything non-alcoholic, with lots of ice. The cold seemed to help a lot. I had been relieved of the obsession to drink (for today), but still became hideously thirsty, so carrying around some liquid with me really helped. If you want some good tips, besides the ones posted here, there's a little book called, "Living Sober," which has some great suggestions for just that. Something sweet can help, too. Just hang in there, get your bottle of non-alcoholic juice, get to a meeting ASAP, and share what you're going through. We've all been through it and know just what you're talking about. Don't get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, or (my addition) Thirsty.

Thank God for sobriety and all you fellow trudgers on the Road to Happy Destiny. I couldn't be doing it without you.

Happy Sunday! Patt


Member: James L.
Location: Montrose, Colorado
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 18:13:47

Comments

Hi, I'm James Akly,

There is no substitute for alcohol. Nothing gives me that sense of ease and comfort with just a single drink; Then commences to kick my butt all over the place and has me come back for more and more. I'm finding through the fellowship of AA that my problem is alcoholism, 5% drinking, 95% thinking. I needed a substitute for living. In my adventures of living sober, I found a substitute for the life I had been living. That is the fellowship, who ruined my drinking, and gave me a higher power that ruined my thinking. God does for me what I cannot do for myself.

I had to substitute my way for God's will, my loneliness for fellowship, my undisciplined ways for 12 steps, my know-it-all mind for being teachable, I've been given this gift of sobriety and there is no substitute for that.

I can always TRADE higher powers(material things), but I will get similar results as I did from the booze. I can be coocoo for Cocoa Puffs, Hooked on Phonics or mad about you! Chocolate helps every thing! HA HA

The point is, I'm not looking for substitutes for alcohol. Why would I do that to myself? I have a higher power that works. Finally!

I like Perrier water, it's carbonated. I still love to burp like an old sailor! Ha Ha And I don't puke on my friends, get into fights, get DUIs, wake up with aliens, and I get my thirst quenched!

Hope to see ya around the tables Thank You for sharing; and for my life If you don't drink today, you are a success! james l. drop a line anniel@ocinet.net


Member: jennifer
Location:
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 19:57:22

Comments

this is for Snow. Sorry to hear about your Dad. I, too, went through deep depressions post surgery and it is hell., For me, antidepressants have helped. I know it is a controversial issue in the program, but as my Doctor told me, a chemical imbalance in your brain CAN be adjusted, and the resulting normalcy may give your father the strenth needed to recuperate fully and avoid relapse. Many of the newer varieties have few side effects and are very fast acting. St. John;s Wort has a good track record, but some of the pharmecuticals and stronger and more reliable due to stricter quality controls than herbal supplements have. Good luck. Call your fathers doctor, or check out some of the medicle advise sites on the net which describe different kinds of depression and the various treatments. I don't feel my sobriety is compromised by the use of a prescription antidepressant, and I know my chances of staying sober were greatly diminished during my deep and serious depressions. Happy and Sober today. Jennifer


Member: Emmie C.
Location: Florida
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 20:00:08

Comments

AA has not only been a road of recovery but a road of discovery.I have learned that I have a number of addictions. I don't need to look for them. I quit smoking many years ago before I hd any idea that I was a victom of this dread disease.Now my shopaholism can kick in any time I'm sad or lonely.My worrying can get out of hand. The best thing forme after a meeting is to plan something with another AA. I am obsessiveand compulsive and try to think positively. Sugar is very important when we quit drinking. Yogart is better than ice cream for our health. Cheers!!!


Member: Paul C
Location: Antioch CA
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 20:11:09

Comments

Hi Fellowship, Alkie Paul here.

Alternates hay. At first it was candy and hot tea/cocca. During my second year of soberity it was meetings. From the 3rd-5th years its been scuba diving and deep sea fishing. All these I do "obsesive compulsively" And that's part of my diease. These too cause an imbalance in my life. Hay, "progress not prefection" In either case I sober today. Everyone have a good week.


Member: Tommy D
Location: Georgia
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 20:31:23

Comments

hi! I'm Tommy and I have five months of being sober. I was just playing with the net and found you guys, read some coments and just thought I would say hello, and I and I a'm glad to be here.I am working out of town so sunday is about the only time I have to listen. I will be looking forward too checking this page out again next week. Thanks for letting me be here.


Member: Chuck K.
Location: Texas
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 20:44:55

Comments

Hi everybody, I'm Chuck and I'm an alcoholic. I've been sober all day, by God's Grace, and I'm grateful.

Substitutes for the ease of alcohol. I guess I was fortunate, for if I get honest, the last days of my drinking brought absolutely no ease whatsoever. I had passed the point where I could get that happy buzz and do away with the hole in my belly. Instead, I could drink enough to black out, pass out, and pee the bed with no relief. And then I could repeat it as soon as my eyes opened, no matter what time of day or night.

The sense of ease described in the doctor's opinion, of course, is what I obsessively was after. I just couldn't find it in the bottles anymore. That led to desparation and ultimately to you.

What have I found since? I've done to excess about everything others have shared. Nothing worldy really gave me that sense of ease.

Surrender did and does. I can pray to my Creator with humility and honesty and feel him course through my being and relieve whatever self-imposed tension--emotional or mental or both--that I'm feeling. It's so cool, and "How It Works" is right there in the Big Book.

Man, I love sobriety and I love AA. You people gave me a life that works 15 years ago, and I am grateful for all who trudge with me in this incredible journey.

God Bless all here. Love from Texas.


Member: Christa
Location: USA
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 20:45:32

Comments

Welcome Tommy. Come back whenever you can, and also check out the coffee pot on this site. It makes for interesting reading.


Member: Tamara M.
Location: AZ
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 21:02:27

Comments

Hi...Tamara, alcoholic/addict. The topic is what we use in place of our favorite drugs when we get sober. I don't smoke but I know I gained at least 10 lbs in the first month! I go on Diet Coke binges now and then (careful..any binge can be a relapse warning). I guess using anything too much...food, sex, caffiene isn't good but darn it, we sure aren't perfect yet, just sober today. Pass the cookies.


Member: Frank G.
Location: cape may ct. hs. New Jersey
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 21:04:23

Comments

Old timers or new commers we are only sober by the grace of God one day at a time. I'm sorry to hear about Snow Y's dad! Even with 51 years sober the emotional let down from opiates can be a terrible thing.

I am by no ways a doctor. I can only share my experience, strenth and hope. I fell into the boobie trap when I herniated a couple cervical dics. The pain was intence but not as intence as the emotional pain. I stoped taking the meds and started to double, triple , quadruple up on meetings. I need to have a ferm spritual defence for the surgery I was about to undertake. I went into the hospital totaly honest I AM AN ALCOHOLIC. I told everyone and even though I was all feared up both doctors and nurses came up to my stretcher and asked me if I was a friend of Bill's I was only able to nod. They came out of the woodwork and told me they were praying for me. WOW!! I even got a alcoholic physican to handle my pain management and call my crying and uplift me when needed. His medicine or precription was to go to meetings.

I went into surgery at 7 am woke up in the recovery at 10:30am, back in a room by 12 noon, walking around by 1pm (wanted to make sure everything still worked) Was eating be 3pm and out the door by 4pm. I had cervical discs fused and a plated put in and a piece of bone taken from my hip. I left the hospital without a precription for pain and was told to take tylnol. That is truly the grace of God and the prayers of the peole in the fellopship of alocholic anonymous. I was at a meeting the next day although I couldn't drive and I was in discomfort I keep praying and thinking about the way I felt when I stoped taking those opiates three months prior to sugery. It's only by the grace of God I didn't drink over it and although some might say I lost my sobriety I'm sober today and working with other alcoholics. I can't base todays sobriety on yesterdays lorials. When I get a good idea I need to get a second opinion. sorry about the spelling I tend to get excited!!!!


Member: Norm f
Location: Maine
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 21:57:34

Comments

Norm f Maine This is for SNOW sorry to hear about your dad but you need to go to meetings and work on staying sober and get the spiritual part of the program so you dont end up like him plus this is the only way you can be there for him good luck


Member: dj
Location: norfolk
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 23:00:29

Comments

say i am a alcoholic at this meeting.!!!!


Member: Chris B.
Location: Central Texas
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 23:01:27

Comments

Hi! I'm Chris and I'm an alcoholic - 7 years sober on August 30th and very grateful for all of you out there. I agree with those above - the only thing that brought me "ease" was getting my backside in a meeting. I white-knucled for 7 months before I found the door; and I can tell you that I was anything but sober despite not taking a drink or a drug. My first sponsor told me two things right off the bat: (1) there is a God and you're not it; and (2) make as many meetings as you can - preferably 90 meetings in 90 days. Sometimes, my work schedule would be so hectic that I couldn't make the Noon meeting that I like best, so I had to find a couple evening meetings. The thing I quickly realized is that I wasn't the only fool out there with an internal committee spinning his brain like a yo-yo. No matter how long we have each been off the sauce, all of us have the same length of sobriety - today. And this one has been a real gift. Thanks for being here, y'all. Its a great night to be alive and sober at the same time.


Member: Krista K.
Location: SA
Date: 12 Sep 1999
Time: 23:41:15

Comments

Hi Krista and an alcoholic for sure.

My true friendships in AA are a really neat substitute for the old playmates, playpens, and playthings I used to have when I was drinking. I even fell in love with someone recently in the program, who was sober with the same time like me. He shares the same dreams, and is fun to be around. Unfortunately, we aren't together now. We're still alcoholic, after all, and his friends have encouraged him to move on. A real bummer, like they really know who I am, such is life. My life today is so rich since I came into AA, even with the ups and downs, my downs are much better than the best day sober. I cherish my true AA friendships, the honest ones, more than I can express. Even with the wierdness of having a 'relationship' in the program, it is far better than all the false friendships and loves that were only looking to get something from me when I was drinking. I love my AA frineds, because they stick with me through thick and thin, know that I have my ups and downs, but are always just a phone call away to lend me a hand when I need one. The best thing I can say, is that when two people have a loving connection with a HP, and they are coming a God centered and honest space, the joy they can share is truly incredible. I pray that I can some day again find a relationship with the love of my life, but in the meantime, the relationship I have with my true AA friends is such a gift!

Thanks for the share!!


Member: DonF
Location: NH
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 00:07:33

Comments

Don, Recovering Alcoholic. Alcoholic always, and recovering because I got to a meeting today, spoke to people in program, and didn't drink. I didn't give any thought to taking a drink, and haven't for a long time. But, speaking of substitution, I did do some pigging out on food, and was considering a big root beer float, one of my favorite "fat pills". I also considered peeking at an X-rated website or two...those are detrimental to my spiritual condition as well, one of the "substitutes" that I have a tendency to use to gratify myself. Push on the balloon, and it pops out somewhere else, unless you let the air out. The "air" is ego and self will, and unless I turn it over to my Higher Power, by picking up the tools of the program, meaning acceptance, prayer, and admitting my faults to God and other human beings, I will have a propensity to find some other compulsion or outlet. And I ask God for another day of sobriety, freedom from all these compulsion. I am not recoverED, I only have another day of sobriety, a daily reprieve, contingent on maintenance of my spiritual condition. DonF Lytch49@aol.com


Member: JCP ^\^
Location: Penn's Woods
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 00:19:35

Comments

J here, a grateful alcoholic:

After we eliminated all our alcoholic depression, where would our pleasant surprises come from?

At times I have thought up real or presumed threats, then family members explained over the phone that all was normal, and made my day for weeks.

It might be that alcoholics like myself, on past experinece, want nothing more to do with ups and downs after we sense peace in A.A. But obody's happy all the time -- if they were, how could they tell? Their life would have all the excitement of an ocean with no waves.

Come to think of it, I don't recall any of those pleasant surprises since I have been thinking about this, which may be a sign that I should turn it back over to our Higher Power.


Member: jerry n
Location: NEPA
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 00:32:55

Comments

I'm an alcoholic&my name is jerry. It's great to be sober todayand I'm glad you're all here. This is my first cyber meeting, and I like all that has been shared. Early in my recovery, I felt as though I not only lost my best friend(alcohol) but I also lost my best pasttime. I can relate, mostly to those who shared bout searching outside of ourselves to ease the discomfort within. I have been sober for a couple of 24s, and I can still catch myself doing things compulsively. It is alcoholism, not wasm. Fortunately, this program is structured with a built in maintainnce program. It is the tenth step, if I continue to monitor my behavior, I can be aware of compulsions, and then take a personal inventory anfd find out what is really going on with this alcoholic. I can usually fill the void, that emptiness we all feel, by working the program,ie; honestly sharing with another drunk, connecting with my HP, admiting where I'vebeen wrong and moving on. I am not a saint, I quit smoking tobacco after being sober for 5 yrs., but after 18 mos. my addiction told me it was ok to smoke cigars while driving on vacation.(switching seats on the titanic) I've been smoking the for almost 2 years,now. I know that recovery is the process for one to become whole, it is a process that will take a lifetime. I may someday quit smoking today, might give up caffiene, too. I have found other activities and more sociality in AA that are much more rewarding than I ever found on a barstool, so I no longer need old playmates or playgrounds. Thanks for letting me share, and thank you for helping me stay sober, today. JWN Greatbender


Member: GerriM.
Location: Alaska
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 00:58:11

Comments

Hi I'm Gerri an alcoholic. this Wed. will be 60 days sober for me, YAH!! I'm still new to the program, but am very serious about recovering. I spent 21days at a recovery hosp. I feel very fortunate to have had the opportunity and support to do so. I live in a remote area of Ak. so its difficult to get to meetings , or their not happening. Right now we have 3 a week So I can't substitute meetings for cravings, I need to find other alternatives. I like to express myself through artsy stuff or crafts. I like to eat ice cream ( my buttocks shows it) ...I seem to be watching more movies lately, I like cops and robbers, or a good homicide.(with Val K.)I also seem to be taking more naps. I'm finding more ways to just have fun with my kids. I also am getting back in touch with my Higher Power. I've been grieving over the death of my 22 yr. old daughter and for the last 2.5 yrs. have had trouble praying (lots of anger). But thanks to A.A. and the progress of my recovery I am beginning to get more peace. I'm beginning to feel love once again from my Higher Power. And hope that their is still some good and humble people in the world. I glad we have this place to share, Gerr


Member: Chris H.
Location: NC
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 01:58:28

Comments

Hi, my name is Chris and I'm an alcoholic. I have found that running gives me the feeling that I was looking for when I was drinking. I still deal with all of the emotional stuff, but physically I feel better when I run.


Member: Danette R
Location: British Columbia
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 05:15:47

Comments

Thank you all for sharing...this is really nice to be able to express our feelings and share with others. I am really new to AA, this is only my second visit to this site,I understand that we help ourselves by helping others.

I have been being a celibate hermit type character. I have been indulging in reading, painting, writing, drinking major water, losing weight, praying, keeping the faith and having hope.

Life is truly grand and way to short...Living life with drugs and alcohol was not really living. I am grateful for today...Thanks for listening and have a wonderful day...

email: danette@uniserve.com


Member: Fred
Location: MD
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 07:10:27

Comments

I'm Fred and I'm an alcoholic. Thanks for all the wisdom and experiences in the comments this week. I liked especially Joel H's reference to "another chance at life" and when he "first came back" (to life, I believe). Also to Dannette who said she is a hermit-- I like activities I can do alone, so I can relate to that. When I first stopped drinking, I started heavy exercise and heavy reading and those became my substitutes, and still are today. The running wears me out, evens me out, and gives me a sense of accomplishment. The reading (much of it about acloholism) helps fill the time and gives me a lot to think about. I was too drunk to read for 15 years, so it's also a good reminder that I used to drink myself cross-eyed. Anyway, both of these activities give me a chance to think, occupy my time, and neither one makes my wife want to leave me, costs me my job, or makes me kill somebody in my car. Thanks to all who take the time to comment. It is invaluable. Love, Fred.


Member: Garry  L.
Location: Tuscaloosa, Al. V. A.
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 10:02:46

Comments

Hi Family, My name is Garry L. I am a alcoholic . I have been sober for 60 days . By the grase of my HP it has been going O.K. . Today I would like to tell you all I never thought I would ever stop drinking . Now that AA is in my life ever thing seems to have a brigther look on them . After serendering that no matter what I did with out help from my GOD it would only get worse.

After coming to a program in the V.A.Hosptil for 28 days . I learned that the only thing drinking boos wants from me is my life. A.A. has shown me that I do not have to fighit this war alone. Thank each one of you for being here when I need you. Thank you for letting me share.


Member: Lin
Location: Conn.
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 10:54:29

Comments

Hi! I am a current alcoholic, but wanting and now willing to change that - what scares me, and I know this isn't part of the curent discussion, but I don't know where else to go - does stopping always result in the DT's? I've tried to read info from medical libraries so I'll be prepared to withstand what is about to happen - would appreciate your experiences/advice - thanks


Member: Bill J.
Location: South Tx.
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 13:23:46

Comments

Hi my cyber friends..For Snow's dad. The program tells me to use resorses avaible. My wife was diagnosed with terminal cancer.I could not sleep so went to my Dr. he gave me some medication that helped for a while then I was back at square one . I called my daughter (a masters digree nurse) she told me to see a professional so I went to a Psychiatrist who hospitalized me for 6 days with clinical drpression and worked up the right med's for me. I feel almost normal (not high) and am doing good at this time. My stepson and my spiritual advisor are both in the program and physocolist with councling backgrounds and they tell me to follow the Dr. instrustions to the letter and he will cut back at the right time. So I going on faith that my advisors know what they are talking about.Had I not found this relief I would have killed myself by now and I know that isnt the answer but could not take any more sleepless nights after 2 months of one to two hours sleep a night. I am not ashamed to seek professonal help and this program has been my subistute for alcohol for 23 years. Love to all my cyber friends BJ.


Member: Dan H.
Location: Cleveland
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 14:16:23

Comments

Hi, Dan H. alcoholic here:

Lin, please call your local AA central office and speak face to face with someone who has found sobriety. Usually we are not medical professionals, but we do know where and who to call if medical attention is required. Not everyone undergoes delirium tremens as a result of alcohol withdrawal. It does sometimes happen, however, especially if alcohol use has been long- term, frequent and heavy. When DT's do occur, they can be successfully treated by a qualified medical professional, usually in a clinical setting. Oldtimers in AA used to keep a jug on hand to treat newcomers with a maintenance dose of alcohol, just in case. I don't know if this is still done in your area. What I do know is, that if you call your local AA number, you will get immediate help with your problem, and it won't cost you more than the price of a phone call. Please, make the call and keep coming back.


Member: Joanna
Location: Oregon
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 18:31:30

Comments

Joanna-Member of AA- I am so gratefull to be alive and sober today. I am not aware if there is a topic, I do need to get some things off my chest. I am fully aware that I need to turn a certin part of my life over( more that I have). I want to take over control and I know that God is fully aware of what is best for me and has my best intrest in mind I just am getting a little anxious so I want to take control. I have prayed and asked for the right direction to be shown to me and sometimes I can not see if what I see is God at work or my manipulation. So here I sit I do nothing waiting for God to show me the way, I don't want a lightning bolt but a simple sign would be nice. But I guess sometimes when you don't know what to do, don't do anything. Well, I thank everyone for letting me get that off my chest. Take it easy and have a great, sober day. Joanna


Member: Lisa LC
Location: Ventura County, CA.
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 20:56:46

Comments

Hi, my name is Lisa LC and I am an alcoholic and a addict-

A substitute for drinking or using? A meeting for me or a talk with another alcholic, a cup of coffee and chating on AOL, a prayer. My list can go on and on. I know that unfortunately, I like sweets. This has been a weight gaining problem though. It seems as if I cannot get enough of them. Even though it has been 7 months. I am probably going to need to use this program the way I use it for my alcholism, for the desire of eating so much of that sweet stuff. I haven't enjoyed this weight gain stuff, seeing that I was so skinny for so many years (never really heavy) now to a 45 lbs. extra. It has been hard to except this. But, using or drinking is not even a thought of keeping myself thin. It is just not worth my life. Thank God and AA for this way of thinking. I truely am very grateful that I am a sober member of Alcholics Annoymous today. It does feel awesome. I welcome all the new friends newer than myself here to this wonderful way of "Living Life on Life's Terms". Stick around and you'll feel as grateful as I am today. Thanks for the privilge of sharing with you. Make it a great day. Lisa LC / LCRMOMX3@cs.com


Member: Betty A.
Location: mi
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 22:40:53

Comments

hi, my name is betty and i am an alcoholic. i also have trouble with depression. letting your doc know about your alcoholism may help them help you. Also, in the big book is a story "The Man Who Mastered Fear" has helped me. I pray the prayer on page 280 everday now. Also I go to meetings ESPECIALLY when i don't want to. One day at a time and thanks for listening! Betty A.


Member: Steve H.           
Location: LINCOLN, NE
Date: 13 Sep 1999
Time: 23:45:05

Comments

Hi, I'm Steve and I'm an alcoholic. When I Finally quit drinking,the central focus of my life left me. Insanity reigned supreme. I shook, I lied, I hid, I cried. Then I stumbled into a midnight meeting of AA. For the first time in my life I knew I was not alone. The fellowship of AA Became my substitute for drinking. Half a dozen meetings a week for two years saved my backside. Life becomes very full for we who trudge. My current obsessions a decade later include raising kids,dog,cain. Also hooked on bicycling,hiking,4x4s,and this infernal computer. This is my first visit here,and its good to have a meeting without paying a sitter.


Member: Ben
Location: Oregon
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 00:03:22

Comments

Ben, alkie-addict. There is no substitute. The whole idea is to help yourself. I notice that all the people in our meetings smoke like chimneys and drink extremely strong coffee. I don't know if anyone agrees, but these things will kill you just as easily ass drugs and alcohol(maybe not as graphically). Personally I like to work alot and keep myself busy so I don't have time to think about drinking. I ride my bike as much as possible also. That helps keep me busy and my body healthy. Meetings are good for you, just don't live on coffee and cigarettes. By the time you find piece of mind those things will have deteriated your body.


Member: Bruce G
Location: Memphis
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 01:10:22

Comments

"lo friends, IB Bruce, alcoholic, Oregon Ben, I'm with you. If I ever find myself feeling "squirrely", I get busy! Put my hands on something quick and work at it. Doesn't matter much what it is as long as it gets me out of "self" and back on the "road".


Member: GOD
Location: in your brothers and sisters
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 01:46:54

Comments

I will accept no substitutes! I'm not your personal butler!


Member: Jean-Claude T.
Location: Belgium
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 06:37:52

Comments

My name is JC and I’m an alcoholic. Comin’ to AA I’ve been told to drink a lot of non alcoholic beverages. I drank sparklin’ water and coffee (later I shifted for tea and tisanes, better for my nerves and stomach). In the first 2 months I drank from 6 to 8 liters a day. I still drink more than “normal people”, but now, if I don’t have a glass for 4 hours, that’s no big deal. That was for the physical part, the substitute for the drink in my hands.

To find a substitute for the drink I had in my head, I had to try and live the program, go to meetings, share with my sponsor and sober alcoholics, change habits in my life, pray, meditate, establish contact with a Power Higher than myself. I’m bound to do that, one day at a time. Otherwise I’ll sooner or later let that drink come back in my mind, then in my hands. I’ve heard too many friends who made that experience for me and were lucky enough to come back to tell it. I’ve been sentence to life to AA and it’s program. What a wonderful punishment!!!

Thanks for havin’ let me share.


Member: Ron L
Location: Winnipeg Canada
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 07:24:51

Comments

Thank God that when I came to A.A. they never asked me to give up any thing but to try to stay sober one day at a time. I like the topic and understand the problem, but in A.A. we have one primary purpose - to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers. Where would we be if all those other problems became our purpose. What about the idiot sponsor who tells the new commer "no sex for the first year" My idea about that is " sex is healthy smoking kills" so no smoking for the first year LOL And then because alcohol is so baffling and cunning and all powerful, it would love nothing better than to take our minds off of recovery from its grip by having us worry about all our other defects. I know one thing thats for sure. Giving up alcohol and doing the 12 steps of recovery will straighten out ones life over a period of time. Things are getting better, life is getting easyer,and I can see an improvment Ive only been at it for 26 years And you know some thing... it sure beats drinking


Member: holly m.
Location: ft. wayne IN
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 08:58:04

Comments

Hi holly alcoholic. For me i did'nt realize any big changes in habits right away. It took about a year of not drinking to even come to some level of understanding. My sponsor had a sponsor who use to buy excessive amounts of coffee and put it under his bed. He had so much coffee when he went to BIG meeting, that his collection supplied quite a few meetings at that time. Was this bad? As long as i dont put alcohol in my body I am going to be okay through the fellowship, faith, reading the big book, going to meetings, a sponsor, a home group, and (practicing)the 12 steps of A.A. in my life. I will be okay.


Member: Jason F
Location: British Columbia
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 11:46:55

Comments

Hi, I'm Jason, an alcoholic. The only things that help me get by when I'm craving a drink, or my disease is giving me insane thoughts is going to a meeting, having a little sweet snack (moderation here too, folks), and just plain doing things I never did (or forgot to do) when I was drinking, like hugging my cat, enjoying nature, calling a friend in recovery, and probably most important, steps 1,2, and 3 - talking to my HP and not holding back. Sure, sometimes it feels like I'm talking to the wall, but I almost always feel better after.

And to Lin, I agree with Dan H., call your local A.A. office. They know what you're going through and will be able to help you or point you in the direction of help. You're not alone out there. Just reach out and ask for help - I did, and nobody ever said "no" or sought fit to judge me. Life can get better. Not easier, but much, much better.


Member: Chris H.
Location: Colorado
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 12:14:16

Comments

Chris H. here, an alcoholic.

Rick S., I too drank tea like mad when I first got into the program. I also started drinking coffee like a fiend, and had to cut back

Krista K., wow, I can really relate with what you said. My true friendships in AA are a blessing. I think you were meaning to say, "my downs (today) are much better than the best day drinking?" and I agree.

Leslie H, you said, "I try not to think of it as looking for alternatives to alcohol because that keeps me searching on the outside for what ails me when I know it's an inside job."

Right on Leslie! I was glad to hear someone point this out.

Today, I also have to do life at my own pace. I do my best when I first work on establishing a conscious contact with God, and then take care of Chris. For example, I like to go to the mountains to relax and meditate. Sure it is sort of an escape, as was pointed out to me recently, but it is a healthy one for me, and one that gives me peace of mind so that I can get answers from my prayers. I have a tendency to have a lot of noise in my head, thoughts galore, and peace of mind helps me sort things out. I often take meditative solitude away from people to recharge, and to give me a chance to think on my own. This helps me become more firm in understanding what's going on with Chris. Also, my pace of living is different today. Sure, I can get going and run a race in life, but often, I am more likely now to be reflective, before I take action. For example, I went Bunji Jumping with a group of sober people. It was a blast! Where I stalled out was in signing the waiver before the jump. The group of my friends were all running for the balloon saying, "hurry up Chris," but I had to work out my emotions right then. That was my moment of decision. The others ‘freaked out' going up to jump, and some decided not to jump once they were in the balloon. I was calm as a kitten on a couch, and had a blast bailing out of the balloon. This is a different pace for me today. I used to be very impulsive, and would get into things without any real thought, and would sometimes have to deal with the repercussions for weeks or months afterwards. Today, by the grace of God, I ‘usually' know what I'm getting into before it happens, and my moment of truth is at a different place.

I guess my point is that people in the program of AA have given me a gift, the gift of freedom. Today I don't have to be ruled by my feelings or outside influences, if I pray first, and listen to my prayers. There are times I falter on this too, but I'm only human, and I know it is progress for this alcoholic, and not perfection.

Thanks for letting me share. May you all find peace and serenity through AA too.

Chow!


Member: kevin L
Location: SE England
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 17:39:09

Comments

Kevin L Here

I have been sober approx 6.5 years, but have only been on the net for 6 days.

Does anybody want to email me and tell me any good AA relted sites.

klea@eurobell.co.uk


Member: John.L
Location: Newark,De
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 21:28:42

Comments

Hi my names:John Alkie/Addict Thanks for this topic,,it is a good one,,and I to smoke more now then before !!but one addiction at a time,,,,I enjoy a hot cup of tea at home or a French Vanilla Coffee form Wawa,,,I attend regular meetings to keep me in the day,,,,so that way i never forget where I came from.my sponsor has taught me so long as I don't get away from basics I don't have to go back to them.

Today was a good day for me ,,cause i was able to help another alcoholic in recovery from wanting to true'ly drink today,,,and by helping them it just strenghtened my belief that i'm a alcoholic and that i can no longer drink safely. so by helping them i was actually helping myself stay sober today also,,,cause i'm only one drink away from the old me,,and i don't like that person ,,so I do what you all have taught me to do,,which is goto meetings,call my sponsor,share my emotions good or bad,and no matter what,don't pick up that first drink,welp thats it for me!! thanks for reading !!time for another cup of Tea :>)


Member: mike L
Location: rocky mountain
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 22:08:13

Comments

Hi my name is mike I am an alcoholic when I first stoped drinking I also drank alot of soda and juices. By the way this is my first time writing something.Ive been sober 4months. what helps me is to attend meetings, remebering my last drunk, and getting a sponsor. It whas very diffcult for me to ask for help I was a low bottom drunk who lost every thing so it is very easy to remember how tough it was well, thanks for letting me share


Member: mike L
Location: rocky mountain
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 22:08:27

Comments

Hi my name is mike I am an alcoholic when I first stoped drinking I also drank alot of soda and juices. By the way this is my first time writing something.Ive been sober 4months. what helps me is to attend meetings, remebering my last drunk, and getting a sponsor. It whas very diffcult for me to ask for help I was a low bottom drunk who lost every thing so it is very easy to remember how tough it was well, thanks for letting me share


Member: Bob H
Location: SE Alaska
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 23:11:16

Comments

Bob Alcoholic, Am going through major pain in my life. quit smoking 2 weeks ago and have been losing weight. Depression is an effective diet. As for smoking, I said and believed, I cant-He can-Gonna let him. My new addiction is trying to live in the moment. Im a hermit in a house with 3 kids. Peace


Member: Dave W.
Location: Rockaway Beach, OR
Date: 14 Sep 1999
Time: 23:14:34

Comments

Hi my name is Dave and alcohol is my problem. In early soboriety meetings were my salvation. Anything to do with the program also helped - i.e., coffee afterwards, aa/ca/na functions of any sort. And of course just talking other alcoholics. I was a hard-heard and never got a real soponsor, which made things a little tougher. Going on 9 years and am really glad to be where I am at today. Life could not be better. Glad I live on the west coast instead of the east coast tonite. Don't quit before the miracle.


Member: Big John M.
Location: Modesto, CA
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 01:03:46

Comments

Hi everybody. I'm John, a real alcoholic. Substitutes, huh? From 1983 to 1994 when I was trying to customize the Program to suit me (do it my way;the comfortable way) I tried all kinds of stuff: running, weightlifting,reading a 6 foot tall bookcase full of spiritual, inspirational and psychology books, chocolate, icecream, KFC, renovating houses, restoring old cars, going back to school and getting a graduate degree in psychology, etc. etc. Needless to say I went in and out like a yoyo. Thank God I was finally whipped on July 6,1994 and I surrendered, fully and completely. Only then did I begin to follow the suggestions of the program fearlessly and thoroughly and I haven't had a craving (I have been relieved of the obsession)since that date. It hasn't been easy at times; heartattack and bypass surgery at 94 days sober; a bitter,nasty divorce and child custody battle; 2 step-sons in active addiction, one on his way to prison; panic attacks; death of my father, etc. But you know what? With the tools of the Program under my arm and the principles of the Twelve Steps applied to my daily living it has been "doable" and so rewarding! I give all credit for my sobriety to God to Whom I turned it over to over 5 years ago, and my wonderful life today is a result of practicing this Program (which is another gift from God) faithfully every day from my morning reading, prayer and meditation to my thanks at night when I retire. I thank God for all of you out there because I don't just believe, I know, I cannot do this my way. I am so glad I got this computer and discovered this meeting as I had soccer practice and couldn't get to my fellowship tonight. Goodnight and God Bless you all.


Member: Geri W
Location: Va
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 04:38:47

Comments

Geri, a very grateful alcoholic here. Hi folks.

Gosh, a substitute for alcohol and drinking. I was so beat up, I didn't know I needed one. Just knew that this disease had me whipped. So I guess I'd have to say the Program of AA. All of it, the steps, the meetings, the 12th step work and being there whenever someone needs the hand of AA held out to them. I am one of the blessed ones who had the obcession removed - and I stay spiritual fit to assure that it does not return - on a daily basis. It works for me.


Member: Mike K
Location: Akron OH.
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 15:04:28

Comments

Thank for the topic i never heard of anyone getting a DUI, or hurting someone from to much coffie or pop, or tea. So if thats what you need right now thats cool. But for me i know I suffer from a diease of addiction no matter what it is the alcohol was just a symtom it was my thinking. that why i have to dive into this program. No shit my life deppends on. If no one told you today they love you I do.


Member: Mike K
Location: Akron OH.
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 15:05:06

Comments

Thank for the topic i never heard of anyone getting a DUI, or hurting someone from to much coffie or pop, or tea. So if thats what you need right now thats cool. But for me i know I suffer from a diease of addiction no matter what it is the alcohol was just a symtom it was my thinking. that why i have to dive into this program. No shit my life deppends on. If no one told you today they love you I do.


Member: Luke K
Location: New England
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 16:13:46

Comments

Hello,

My name is Luke and I now admit I'm an alcoholic. I really need some help. I'm only 27 but alcohol is killing me. I have the shakes and am confused most of the time. I have lost hearing in my left ear and I think it's from the alcohol. I suffer from depression and anxiety and a severe sleeping disorder. My doctor prescribed Xanax to try to help me not use alcohol to sleep. I am now addicted to both Xanax and alcohol. I have tried to not drink but I just can't sleep. I don't know what to do. Please somebody, I want to do something to end this insanity but I'm stuck. I start going crazy after a few nights with almost no sleep. How long would it take for me to feel normal again if I stop drinking and taking Xanax? I'm sorry for rambling but I'm at the bottom and scared and I don't know what to do. Thank you for listening. My e-mail address is lukekeffer@hotmail.com.


Member: Chris H.
Location: Colorado
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 16:46:22

Comments

Hi Chris here and still an alcoholic.

Luke K., checking into a treatment center really helps people who are having severe side affects from alochol. The staff at treatment centers also know how to deal with withdrawl symptoms, which can also be severe.

Alcochol kills alcoholics. I had nowhere to go when I first came to AA either, and all I could do is ask for help. I asked, and people gave it, lots of people who knew what I was going through. Being at the bottom is a start, and having the desire to stop drinking is all it takes.

Call a treatment center, and go. Most treatment centers also have AA meetings, and then you will get to meet plenty of people going through the same thing.

My prayers are with you!

Thanks for allowing the double post folks!


Member: Ria M.
Location: Chicago
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 16:54:14

Comments

Hello. I am a novice poster here, and I'm really interested in what I'm reading. Like Luke, I am a youngish person (29) with what I think is becoming a serious drinking problem. (Note, I have yet to say the A-word out loud. But I will if that's what my problem is.). It cetainly isn't a joy to worry about. Luke, I suspect you should look into AA. Maybe what you need right now is community with people who understand, more than a random perscription from a doctor. Just by reading the above postings, you should realize that you're not alone, whatever your personal hurtles. Seeing as I am not yet sober, and truthfully unsure if that's what I need to be, I can't offer too many tested replacements for alcohol. But, I agree that something sweet works wonders. For those of you obsessed with ice cream, why don't you try a serious fruit smoothy with lots of fruit and fiber so you get really full. I have luck with intense, rich chocolate brownies, the kind that you can only eat a small portion of. You get your fix, but don't eat the whole box. Anyway, I'm glad I happened upon this site. It should give me much food (if you will) for thought on my own life choices. Thanks!


Member: Joe S.
Location: Austin, TX
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 17:45:55

Comments

Hey. Joe S. here from Austin. I'm an alcoholic, but am not with AA right now. I have a cuestion. Many people here talk a lot about god & stuff. Is AA religus? I want to join, but I don't want to pray a lot at meetings. I'm agnostic. Just wondering.


Member: Christa
Location: USA
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 18:27:31

Comments

Joe,

I asked the same question (I just joined the cuber meetings 1 month ago). A lot of people talk about a "Higher Power", others call it "God". A lot just talk about how fellow AA members are of help and support. I like reading the coffee pot on this site. If there is too much talk about god in a post for my taste, then I scroll down. As far as face to face meetings go, I've never been to one, so I can't tell.


Member: RICHARD M
Location: SARASOTA, FLORIDA
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 18:35:27

Comments

AND ALCOHOL WAS BUT A SYMPTOM OF THE PROBLEM .........A DEADLY ONE ........ARE WE SUBSTITUTEIN LESS DEADLY .BEHAVIOR ........INSTEAD OF DEALING WITH THE PROBLEM?????


Member: mao
Location: NE
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 20:09:04

Comments

thank you all for sharing


Member: miss moo
Location: NE
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 20:26:08

Comments

Hi all, maryanne here, alcoholic; Firstly, Luke, the xanax and anxiety should abate once you cease drinking. I am no MD but I went through a similar situation for 6 years, with my DR throwing various meds my way: xanax, prozac, wellbutrin, paxil, etc. None worked until I moderated my drinking. Now I need to stop. But I realized that I had never been really honest with my DR about the extent of my drinking. Once I admitted I had a problem, my DR told me that his treatment of me would have been much more effective had he known. And the first thing he would have told me to do was to get into AA. We're powerless and so is the medical profession. It is a soul sickness as well as an obsession and physical allergy. I hope that you get to a meeting- you'll be surprised at how good you'll feel. and tbere are folks there waiting for the chance to help you. To address the topic: sometimes a bandaid works, and you need it. But eventually you'll heal. Ice cream, coffee, tea, etc. are a whole lot better than booze. But watch it, don't sweat it, but give all of it to your HP. Eventually, you'll be free of it all, with faith and willingness. I have been in and out for 6 mos. and am coming back from a nasty, ugly slip. thank god I hurt noone but myself. This fellowship has saved my life, and now, when I'm down, its given me hope and the realization that there really is something better out there. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Paul Q
Location: Toronto
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 21:52:53

Comments

Alternatives to booze eh?

I do what was laid down for us to follow.. The path contained in the first 88pages including roman numerals......

I do it with another human being one on one.. God gives me spiritual pay cheques thats my subsitute......

1937 to 1939 the 100 (members) wrote those pages they recovered.....meetings where far and few....get back to the core work it the way it was laid down.......

Study the text contained in those pages and transform into the person GOD and yourself wanted to be all this time.....

I'AM BEYOND HUMAN AID.....

Love and Services Paul Q pquigley@sprint.ca


Member: June P.
Location: Colorado
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 22:23:35

Comments

4 things I was told to do when I got on the beam. Don't drink, read the big book, go to meetings and talk to your sponsor. Take it one day at a time and easy does it. What ever I have to do to stay sober is what I have to do. This is a lifetime of recovery. I could not have possibly become free of all character defects those first few days, months and years, it would have been too much to try and cure all overnight. Too hard on ourselves. Take it easy. It all works out the way it is supposed to if we get and stay spiritually fit. We claim progress. We work towards the chosen Ideal. We didn't get sick overnight, we won't get well overnight. Personally I wouldn't have life any other way. I'm called She who fell out of a tree. Don't you love it, I've no recollection of ever having so much fun or so many laughs as well as tears while drinking as I have had in these sober years. Hang in there, and just for today we don't have to drink, drug, obsess or what ever. May we all be kept in good grace.


Member: Mike
Location: MD
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 22:25:56

Comments

I am distressed about how people (individuals) have decided to reshape Alcoholics Anonymous and the traditions. Maryland General Services of AA have come up with the concept (born from individuals not groups) that:

for someone to participate in AA, you must finance two dances on October 29th & 30th! Did the groups get a say? Not to my knowledge!

Again, to make this clear, I cannot attend this AA convention without paying for two dances! Watch for a golf tournament to follow! When I shared my group's concerns I was told, "Don't go!" That's not "Keep Coming Back."


Member: Tommy T.
Location: LA
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 22:45:02

Comments

Hi, My name is Tommy and I'm a 19 year old alcoholic and addict. I am so very surprised and happy to find this page, and equally elated with the number of people that sign on! If the scale on this page is "youngish" at 29, then I am just a baby(which I probably am since the day I picked up the bottle, etc., I did not grow in ANY aspect of my life; until I put it down nearing 6 months ago). I just wanted to comment on two of the responses that I read. The first is the religious/spiritual questions. I rejected any higher power but myself when I was 14, and began to read many writings of alternative beliefs (going so far as to read the works of Alexander Crowley) but finally found one supposedly called deism, which was the belief that you were answerable to no one as you were the highest power. What a selfish deal, huh!?! So when I found the program (or it found me) I came in very closeminded and resentful of all things religious and god-fearing. What it took for me to change was to surround myself with understanding people at AA/NA/CA, and also an open enough mind to realize what works for others is fine, I have no place to reject their belief, but I have to find my own conception of a higher power. My first one was the sun! And it still is included in the higher power package. Basically, be open minded and fair as you would hope others would look at your newfound higher power. Besides, most alcoholics and addicts are basically agnostics when first walking through the doors, I questioned EVERYTHING and had a firm belief in NOTHING. What I do with my time: attend tons of meetings, lots of reading, racquetball!, and helped to start a much needed young person's meeting in my town. I make schedules for every day, because crossing each item out is most satisfying! Take it easy, Tommy T.


Member: Jennifer
Location: England
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 23:18:39

Comments

Hello everyone, this is a great site. This is my third week of visiting. I am so happy that I have just completed my first year of sobriety. I have never been to an AA meeting. I live in a small town and just couldn't face it. But the best step that I took was going to the doctor and being totaly honest with him. He gave me a couple of pills to get me through the next day [I was a mess] but the best thing that he did was to direct me to an 'out of town' counciller. That was my turning point and I have never looked back. I don't need her at this point but it is so good to know that I just have to pick up the phone for help if I should need it. I have read everything I could about AA, and I practise the steps as best I can. I know that I am so helpless when it comes to alcohol, I must be getting help from somewhere else. Can anyone out there explain how the desire to drink can leave so completely. I have maybe more worries and pressures in my life now than I did when I was drinking but the thought of solving any problem with alchohol is now unthinkable. I think that the fact that I went to a doctor and was honest saved my life. I am getting fatter, because I crave sugar and I love my treats and I think that the sugar craving has a lot to do with alcohol addiction. But a few extra pounds is a small price to pay for the happiness and peace of mind that I have today.


Member: Scotty O.
Location: Bowling Green, KY, USA
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 23:22:51

Comments

Hi, my name is Scotty and I'm an alcoholic. I've been sober nearly five months. When I first quit, I smoked a heck of a lot more than I did before, but now my smoking is back to where it was (about half a pack a day). My caffeine intake also skyrocketed, and I'm doing my darnedest to cut that back, as well. I'm experiencing a lot of post-acute withdrawal symptoms, and I know that caffeine and nicotine are not helping. I also developed quite a craving for cake, for crying out loud, and I've never been a bakery type eater. Fortunately, at least for today, my weight is the same as it was eight months ago, according to my doctor's scales. I've also rediscovered my boyfriend of seven and a half years and am once again enjoying my free time with him, which is quite limited, due to varying work schedules. I sure as heck spend a lot more time on my knees, at home and at work (I sneak off into the bathroom when I need a little time with my Higher Power at work!!). I go to about one meeting a day and spend a lot of time with my sponsor, and a circle of recovering friends I met through her. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Roy S.
Location:
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 23:23:38

Comments

I like the topic for this week. I, too, am still searching fopr things to "take" instead of alcohol. It has mostly been tea and water, with some occasional chocolate. However, I liked the post about having to correct the inside instead of just finding a substitute for the alcohol. As I struggle against alcoholism, I am finding that the cravings are less, but still ever-present. The less I will feel these cravings, the less substitutes I will need to find. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Bob C.
Location: Flagstaff, Arizona
Date: 15 Sep 1999
Time: 23:52:49

Comments

Hello, my name is Bob and I am an alcoholic. I have noticed that my soft drink intake and cigarette smoking has increased since I stopped drinking one year ago. This last year has been one of great reflection for me, remembering the good and no longer the bad. Focusing on the goodness that life does have to offer by being sober, one day at a time. Even with my excess of soda and smoking, it is better than having the soul slowly poisoned. I do know that I shall have to cease smoking, this I shall do on my birthday.


Member: Big John M.
Location: Modesto, CA
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 00:48:03

Comments

Hi everybody, I'm John, a real alcoholic. Sorry about the double post but I just read Luke from New England and cringed as I also am a Xanax addict as well as a lot of other things. It was prescribed for me when it was new, (mid 80's) to fix my alcohol and anxiety problems as at the time it was thought to be non-addictive. Oh, hell yes! good stuff! Luke, your MD is an unread fool. The latest poop in the PDR is that it is so addictive that it should be taken in tiny amounts once or twice a day for no more than two weeks in cases of extreme crises. You need to check into a hospital to be tapered off so you don't go into convulsions. After treatment, go to meetings, get a sponser, work the steps, clean house, trust in a Higher Power, and work with others. It works. Tell your MD that in 1990 I was taking 16 mgs. a day with 2 quarts of bourbon to help it work (or whatever my bs justification was to drink at the time. See your MD; chect into treatment. Sorry about the double post again. I almost died and I really reacted to Luke's situation.


Member: Michelle G.
Location: Seattle, Wa. for the moment
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 00:57:30

Comments

I have 85 days in this time. I had over 10 years before I fell off the wagon. I also had the problems of replacing one addiction for another as well. My comment is that the first time around I did the eating thing and gained alot of weight and that did not help my self-esteem issues. That has alot to do with alocohics. I have learned since then that there is a way to control the eating thing. It is when your body craves sugar instead of loading you body with another source of sugar (weight gain) load it with a non-carbohydrate food source. In reading labels it will state alot of fat and so we think I cannot have that I will gain weight, but please go down the list a little farther to see the carbohydrate grams. If it has real low ones or none at all it then works. Or just straight protein takes the cravings of sweet away. Cheese, eggs, meat, etc. I was amazed to find out that a can of green beans had hardly no carbs., and it filled me up and I was not craving the sweet thing anymore. Hope this helps.


Member: Max H.
Location: Texas
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 01:55:04

Comments

Just like a Stupid drunk, I left my message on the wrong board. I need help with my drinking but not from the wrong sourse.Any clues? Max H.


Member: James
Location: Montrose, Colorado
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 02:07:53

Comments

Hi, James Alky,

Mike of MD, AA has a service manual that describes the service structure of AA and it's function as well as it's relationship to Central Offices that oft times work for AA, but are not AA service. You are right, in that AA's 12th step work is not to be paid for.

Please, drop a line to anniel@ocinet.net

I love service work, it beats copping a resentment, huh?

In the fellowship of the Spirit. James L


Member: Owen R
Location: London England
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 12:06:22

Comments

hello drgonzo here an alcoholic you'll be surprissed to hear! 3 days sober at the moment. It's nice to hear everyone else admitting the addiction problem. If I think back to childhood I had the same problem with sweets its a shame that we live in a society that chucks this filthy drug down our throats as a social lubricant, pass the SOMA. Good luck all. #Dr Gonzo


Member: Juliet N
Location: Boston
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 12:14:13

Comments

Hi Everybody, my name is Juliet and I am an alcoholic. Glad to have a few minutes to read this discussion meeting today. Lots of good stuff is being shared.

When I first got sober eight years ago (I only state the length of my sobriety because I believe it shows the newcomer that this program does work ONE DAY AT A TIME) I too had trouble sleeping and craved sweets. I would eat a piece of fudge at night and that helped. But the real issue for me was feeling as if my life was over. It was suggested that I stay away from my old friends and hangouts. But because I was fearful of new sober friendships (I mean after all what would we talk about without a beer in our hand!!!) when I was invited to socialize I would decline and go home alone after a meeting. It was not until I walked thru my fear and accepted invites for coffee or bowling that I learned how to be myself in a group of people just like myself (living just one day without one drink) without a mood altering substance to make it seem easier. Early sobriety is alot like a hallway where one door has closed but another has not yet opened. Go ahead and put your hand on that doorknob!

One of my favorite AA sayings is "Surrender To Win". It was not till I surrendered to my disease that the miracle of sobriety was able to manifest itself. I Can't, He Can, If I Let Him. Now who is the "Him"? For me it is GOD, but for others it is also GOD but they mean Group Of Drunks. This is a "we" program and we do not have to do it alone. Just believe that a power greater than yourself can help you get sober and you have a beginning and if you like you can borrow my higher power until you find one of your own!

Lastly, it troubles me that some drunks get sober without the benefits of the fellowship of AA. There is so much more to gain by attending meetings instead of doing it on your own. Are you getting sober or just dry? I can respect a person's concern for being in a small town or maybe having a fear that their profession might be affected if people knew they were in recovery but I would have to ask you this? Don't you think they knew you were a drunk? After all, we drunks are like a guy walking around with his fly down, the last to know!! I too had a fear of people knowing I was an alcoholic but they certainly saw me stagger home at night after hours on a bar stool. So who am I fooling?

I am grateful to be sober today!


Member: Dan H.
Location: Cleveland
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 14:07:36

Comments

I’m Dan, and I’m alcoholic.

Hi, Max. Call your local AA number. A person on the other end of the receiver will give you instructions on how to begin this program of recovery. It’s free, it’s steps are but suggestions, it’s a program of recovery that has helped millions of drunks like me, and maybe you, to climb up from the depths of fear and despair.

It’s great to hear from you, Joe, Christa. Welcome to AA. Our program is in no way religious. If belief in God were necessary for membership, there might not be an AA program as we know it. You should get in contact with AA using the number in your local phone book. When you call, ask the person how you can get your hands on a copy of “Alcoholics Anonymous”, our textbook of recovery, sometimes (usually) referred to as the Big Book or in cyberese, BB. There is an entire chapter (Chapter Four) that is addressed to agnostics. The very first recorded successful meeting between a person who found a way to beat this disease (Ebby) and a man who wanted desperately to do so (Bill W.) happened in NYC in the mid thirties (1930’s not 30-39th streets). Ebby told his old drinking buddy Bill, that he had got religion. Bill W. had an immediate let down, since he would not be preached to. Ebby made the following statement: “Why don’t you choose your own conception of God?”

Bill W., the man who wanted help, goes on: “It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a Power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning.”

I have heard folks that have used anything from inanimate objects (their coffee cup, the table they were sitting at or the ashtray in the center of the table) to the AA group itself to Jesus of Nazareth as “higher powers”. What amazes me is that it really doesn’t matter what or who your HP is, as long as you take yourself out of the center of the universe and find your place in the overall scheme of things. Recovery begins and continues with the reduction of our egos. As long as something is ‘greater than ourselves’ we have made a start.


Member: Jen P.
Location: Poconos PA
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 17:04:30

Comments

Hi Jen here, grateful recovering alcoholic. As far as a substitute goes, in the beginning I read the "Living Sober" book and it siad to try something sweet when you had a craving. I don't know about that,but I went with it,and it worked. I had a bag of M&M's in my pocket most of the time the first year. I also learned to drink coffee when I came in, and found myself guzzling it like booze. It kept me up at night, but I didn't get arrested, or wake up with people I didn't know. Eventually I moderated my intake of both sweets and caffeine, when my sponsor suggested it. I also substituted the Program and all the tools for alcohol and hanging out in bars. I read the literature, listened to the tapes when I couldn't sleep, went to the diner with folks I met at meetings, took a coffee commitment. If they said it would keep you sober, I did it. They told me the person who puts the chairs up & down never gets drunk. I'm still puting chairs away when I can 5 years later. I have a life I love today, people I love who love me, and an awesome relationship with the God of my understanding. Mostly because I stopped trting to do it my way, which got me here, and started taking direction from those who came before me. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Mary H
Location: Colorado
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 18:05:25

Comments

Hi Everyone, Thanks to all who have shared!Keep it simple,my first sponsor told me to be kind to my self.Yeah,right.Asked how,(AND, WHY )do simple things like taking a bath, buying a small gift.Just start being your own friend. Mary, no one beats up Mary better than Mary!so, for those of you who are new. keep coming back as you are the most important person (well, if we are working a program of honesty)besides myself. In fellowship and love. Mary


Member: Joan K
Location: Florida
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 21:46:49

Comments

Hi I'm Joan, an Alcoholic. I noticed several people with 60 days of sobriety. Today is 60 days for me, I am so very grateful. I am so happy to have this site, my substitute for alcohol has been work, though I think I have always been a workaholic. I don't get to go to many meetings due to my work. So, this is great to 'listen'... my other substitute... sweets, glad to hear that the sweet thing happens to many people here. Another 24 hours to all.


Member: Christine B.
Location: Tampa,Florida
Date: 16 Sep 1999
Time: 21:53:52

Comments

My name is Christine and I am not sure of my alcoholism. All I know I was sober for 4 years and 6 months and I decided to experiment with alcohol. I had a very good life in the program. I was married to someone with 12 years sobriity at the time, and I sponsored many women. I cultivated a true A.A. resentment. It is known as our greatest offender. I had an ex-herion user living with me and she was using without me knowing until the end. When she robbed me of alot of material things. My husband of two years decided he did not need meetings anymore and he was unbearable. I felt betrayed and lied to by two individuals in my life I counted on. I decided to leave my husband and have no contact with the girl I supported financially and emotionally. I was going throyugh a rough time. I decided to try drinking a year ago. I have not returned to the program. I can't get back .I even relocated to Tampa,Florida. From Hermosa beach, California. I am not sure if I can ever get back I have tryed. In recented A.A. because evryone i trusted and cared about seemed to not be real.Thelonger I was sober I could see thru the phoney people that just talked the A.A. lingo but did not have a clue how to put to use. I got tired of the cliche's. If there is anyone real out there e-mail me at califkid@saintly.com. I need to hear from you.God bless.


Member: Wright K
Location: Brookings, Or
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 00:22:04

Comments

My name's Wright and I'm an alcoholic....there is only one alternative to alcohol.....God, as I now understand It. Substitutes will only delay me from finding what I need..........Thanks


Member: AZbill
Location: Sierra Vista, Arizona
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 03:27:40

Comments

As usual the answer to what to take instead of alcohol and be found in the Bif Book. In The Family Aferward it tells us that many physicians suggest the use of sweets is helpful, and feel that all alcoholics should constantly have chocolates available. I do this extensively.LOL. I have never been thrown in jail for eating too much chocolate. Also, remember that we clinically detox generally in 3 to 5 days. Therefore, except in a few rare cases, the physical compulsion has left us. We we are dealing here is the mental obsession. The Book warns us of that in the third chapter. I have found over the years that the only thing that stands between me and my next drink is a God of my understanding, and the only way this alcoholic can find that God is through the first 164 pages of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Thank you all for being here and being a part of my sobriety today

AZbill

az-bill@primenet.com


Member: Raymond B
Location: UK
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 07:43:04

Comments

Message Board for Atheists, Agnostics etc.

Hello All,

My name is Raymond and I am an alcoholic. I have opened a message board on Yahoo designed for atheists, agnostics and other non-theists (Buddhists, Taoists etc.) to share their experience , strength and hope.

The URL is

http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/godlessaa

Bye for now,

Raymond B ,UK


Member: Leigh
Location:
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 08:37:40

Comments

Hi all. My name is Leigh and I am an alcoholic - it does seem strange saying this at first - my first AA meeting is tonight! Thanks to you all for the tips on what else I could drink instead of the liquid which is slowly killing me. If anyone has any other useful tips for a very new member, please keep them coming. Take care all.


Member: Jane
Location: WY
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 11:30:37

Comments

My name is Jane and I'm an alcoholic. Substitutions for alcohol is the topic. Why would I want to substitute for something that literally screwed me up, killed me, took my family, my self, my friends everything? Although my thinking was (and still can be, I'm only as honest today as I can be, it will get better) really messed up in the eraly days and I didn't see what I see now. This is what I did, when I let go of the drug I searched out AA and became addicted to AA ( meetings and to the level of honesty I had at that time a program), as the need to not go to meetings so much and not having a sponser that would not let me depend on her so much I had to grow or go. It was not fun, one day at a time I had to walk the walk with others by my side, but it was I that had to walk the walk they couldn't walk it for me and they wouldn't. Thank God. I had to get to know a higher power that was not human was not a bottle, a drug, a person, or a thing. As I look back on it , it was not fun and it was lonely but I can see the strength that I got from going through it. I had to get as honest as I could on my steps and one thourough 4th/5th step was not enough I had to get more thourough and I pray today that I can not falter from this path, because I never want to go back and pick up the pieces to myself that I had left behind before and had to pick up. It was not easy. Would I like a substitute for alochol, my God is a substitute. Other ways may be easier, but for the short time and not the long run. I can do anything for 1 day , 1 hour, 1 minute that I could not do for a life time.


Member: Anne W.
Location: Florida
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 11:33:27

Comments

Hello everyone,

I was reading through some of the above comments and was amazed and relieved that there are other people out there with stories like mine.

You see, I'm still an alcoholic in denial. I know that, but I'm still doing it. Why? True, I have reduced my drinking down to where I don't wake up and find that I urinated on myself the night before. But, I'm still out there drinking..one, two, three beers at one bar and then driving over to another one to drink 3 more.

When I was in college about 5 years ago, I can remember drinking heavily and the excuse I used to give myself.. "Enjoy your college years while you can".. well, now I'm a working professional, and I'm still out there drinking heavily. I can't even remember the last time I didn't drink for more than a week. In fact, for the past three years, I have been getting drunk at least once or even sometimes twice a week. It's become such a part of my life... I even bought a brewing kit.. what an idiot I am.

It would be ok if I could just drink 1 beer during my visits to the local bars, but I have this ability to drink very fast, so before I know it, I've downed 4 or 5 beers. I've always struggled with compulsive eating and smoking. And my beer just represents another crutch to deal with my pain and lonliness.

I don't know what I'm trying to say here.. I guess I just need to come out of my denial. It makes me so sad to have this fear of living without alcohol and all of its parameters. I can remember a time when I didn't need alcohol to get by.. I can remember when I didn't drink every week or even every month. I just want that feeling of strength back. I'm so tired of being unhealthy and what the alcohol is doing to my mind, spirit and body. I want to stop, but I don't know how to find the strength to live without it.

Any helpful comments or words of encouragement would be appreciated. Thanks.


Member: john O
Location: Maryland
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 12:30:32

Comments

john, alcoholic. Anne W in Florida: I have 15 months. My advice is go to a meeting. The program is amazing. Its so much better than drinking! There is a lot to the program that you never could imagine from the outside. Im so glad I did! Now I am coming out of that fog i sense you are in. Ther are a million reasons not to go to a meeting; your brain will fight you but go anyway. Good Luck. John


Member: Carol L.
Location: Pennsylvania
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 13:26:29

Comments

Hi, I am Carol and I am an alcoholic. I drank yesterday and am very upset with myself. I am reaching out for help and to secure some AA friends to help me through this. This is my first time to join in on this discussion group and I feel it will be a benefit for me. I have been through a thirty day in-patient program about 12 years ago and obviously have not been successful. Please help! In response to an alternative to alcohol, I have nothing special that I turn to other than whatever seems to satisfy my craving at the time other than alcohol. Thanks for allowing me to join in on the discussion.....I will remain sober today!


Member: ellen f.
Location: usa`
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 13:48:25

Comments

hi, my name is ellen and i live in the usa, nj i have been sober going on 4 years or it will be 4 years in march. i attend as many meetings as i can and know that meeting makers make it. still i would love to chat or receive email from anyone in the program i'm sure it would only strenghthen my resolve not to pick up. please feel free to email me at blackrosesnlace@hotmail.com or chat with me through aol instant messanger should you see me logged on under the same name blackrosesnlace. hope to hear from someone whol either i may be able to help or may be of help to me without even realizing it. feel free to read my bio under aol instant messenger, and if you know bill w. by all means talk to me. thanks for now. ellen f.


Member: Ann-marie
Location: Chicago
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 15:11:17

Comments

Hello, I'm Ann-marie from Chicago, and I'm pretty darn sure that I'm an alcoholic. Hmmmm.

Anyway, Anne W., I read your post and I really can relate. A lot of what you said struck home for me. Particularly what you said about living it up in college and then, suddenly, you realize you're still kind of living it up as a professional when all of your buds are over the endless search for "the buzz" or whatever. I didn't indulge in high school much, so when college came, I let loose. Then, it became a random habit, and finally what I fear is a dependence upon alcohol to occupy freetime or to make things seem more "lively." Funnily enough, I too bought a home brew kit. Ahhh, the dasterdly trends of the '90s.

I also long for the days where I it was not a pretty constant thought in my head. It ISN'T FUN to be addicted to a drug that, sure, makes you TEMPORARILY loopy & relaxed -- but also you know slowly pickles your insides and, almost worse, robs you of brain cells. Not to mention what loved ones must endure. Sigh.

Well, I have yet to go to a meeting. But I will. That will be damn scary. I will feel like everyone will be staring at me, even though that's irrational I suppose, seeing as how everyone here has experienced similar issues and seems so supportive. I don't know what to expect, especially as a 20-something woman. Is that wierd?

Anne, both you and I and anyone else here can take control of this. We are stronger than the bottle -- by god! [easier said than done, I'm sure....]. Well, thanks for letting me share.


Member: Penny G.
Location:
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 15:35:27

Comments

I am Penny and I am an alcoholic. I am sober today and very glad to find this meeting. This year I relapsed after 12 years of sobriety. Now I am focusing on the basics, staying in the present and trying to just notice what I'm feeling. Sometimes I feel isolated and that's how I came to find this meeting. As alternatives to alcohol I have used chamomile tea,water, taking a deep breath or meditating. I am glad I am sober today.


Member: Penny G.
Location: east coast
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 15:35:52

Comments

I am Penny and I am an alcoholic. I am sober today and very glad to find this meeting. This year I relapsed after 12 years of sobriety. Now I am focusing on the basics, staying in the present and trying to just notice what I'm feeling. Sometimes I feel isolated and that's how I came to find this meeting. As alternatives to alcohol I have used chamomile tea,water, taking a deep breath or meditating. I am glad I am sober today.


Member: MaryJ
Location: Seattle
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 16:37:33

Comments

Hi, I'm Mary and an alcoholic. There have been many good suggestions about what to substitute for alcohol. I drank to become numb so I am trying to figure out what it was that made me want to be numb. I'm still working on that aspect. Life isn't always fair and I have to work on dealing with that. As far as what to substitute for the alcoholic liquids, I have always liked just plain water, herbal teas and sparkling water. I can do a certain amount of coffee, but I don't drink it in the afternoon. Soda pop makes me bloated, so I try to stay away from that. One thing about getting rid of the alcohol is getting rid of the cravings for any kind of food I could get my hands on. Thank you all for sharing.


Member: Avril G
Location: Driffield UK
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 16:44:59

Comments

For 24 years, alcohol was my Higher Power. It dictated where I went, who I went with, What I did when I got there, how long I stayed. It dictated whether I went to work or stayed at home, whether I hugged and kissed my kids or yelled at them and sent them to their room, It dictated how much money I spent, and how I got the money when I ran out of booze. Alcohol was my friend, my mentor, my life and soul, until one day it finally turned on me, and I felt like I had been bereaved!!! The most powerful thing in my life had turned on me. So for me, the only possible substitute was to find another Higher Power. I found this in AA meetings, as collectively, the people in the rooms were able to not drink for one day at a time, something I had not done for years. If not a drink, some kind of mind-altering substance. I had no belief/faith in God, which many of the older members said they had, but very gradually, I came to believe that the power of example in the groups was a power greater than me, so that became my substitute for booze. I lived, breathed, ate and slept AA, not too healthy a way of life, with the benefit of hindsight, but it certainly kept me dry until such time as I could get a sponsor who took me through the 12-step programme of recovery, and now one meeting each week keeps me ticking over nicely (plus the odd onvention or two, and doing service) The fellowship was then, and I guess still is my substitute, and I can say today that I really enjoy every drink I have (I never could stand the taste of booze, just loved the effect) My favourite soft drink is St. Clements...(Equal quantity of fresh orange juice and Bitter Lemon) Though being a Brit born & bred, I like the odd cuppa tea now and again...

Goodie@cwcom.net

ICQ # 47039989


Member: Rob R
Location: US
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 16:53:28

Comments

Hello, I am Rob and I fell of the wagon...kinda down now....


Member: Bonnie Z.
Location: PA
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 18:14:54

Comments

Hi, my name is Bonnie and I'm an alcoholic. I really can say that easily now, as this program have given me my life back. Certainly it's a program for living, not just existing.

Fortunately, the desire for the drink was removed. I still had a lot of behaviours that needed to be improved. A substitute for the drink-meetings, books, calling my support group, making my gratitude list(which keeps getting bigger and bigger), helping another alkie, you name it. The first Saturday night sober, I thought, what do I do now, on a Saturday, if I don't drink? I remembered there were Saturday meetings, so I called up some friends, we went together, then came back and had popcorn and watched TV. I have real friends today.

As the Irish say "a stranger is a friend you haven't met yet".

Love and hugs to all of you, keep coming back!


Member: mae m.
Location: new york
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 19:31:06

Comments

Hi my name is mae and i am an alcoholic, I have read most of the messages for the week, and thank you all for sharing your experience strenghth and hope so that this alcohholic has something to read and enjoy and to help me to have another wonderful day oof sobriety. I have 32 years of continued sobriety, and the only way i did it was by making meetings, getting a sponsor, joining a group, and getting active in it.... that is what i replaced the alcohol with and it worked "one day at a time" God bless you all... i love you..


Member: John0
Location: Maryland
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 19:31:27

Comments

Im john0, still alcoholic. Im back online and read what Anne-marie said to Ann W. I feel I have to comment. Please read what I said to Ann W. Do you see how alcohol, the enemy, works on the brain? THERE IS NO RATIONAL REASON NOT TO GO TO A MEETING!!!! In the spirit of trying to fight our common foe, I am double posting to suggest, each of you, PLEASE, just GO TO A MEETING. I promise it will all start getting better. AA works if you let it. There is nothing to fear and everything to gain. Love to each and all, John0


Member: Andrew N.
Location: Seoul, Korea
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 20:33:41

Comments

This is very hard. To be honest, I don't know if I fit the profile of most of the people here. I don't drink everyday. I don't have the strength for that. I drink about five to seven times a month. About once every two months I drink and do really stupid stuff that totally complicates my life. I really wish my problem was that I drank everyday and then could deal with that. However, I am dealing with the most cunning demon I have ever known. The problem is not that I can't admit I am an alcoholic. I do. Mostly, the fear is what is crippling me. But the fear subsides and then it starts again. One day I will cause a problem I can't apologize my way out of.


Member: cindyn
Location: California
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 22:51:54

Comments

Hi... My name is cindy and a alcoholic, For me to be happy in my sober life, I need to work the steps, keep in contact with members of the fellowship and ask my HP for guidance in my life. Currently, I have been into sugar lately.. as a quick fix, I binge on it, just like my drinking days. I know this is not a good behavior for me, and I believe I need to give it up. I guess I will be heading to another 12 steps program soon.... after this last piece of pie


Member: Tamara M.
Location: AZ
Date: 17 Sep 1999
Time: 23:05:22

Comments

I went to a party tonight and didn't drink. I kept waiting to feel a craving but I didn't. I realize this is a one night thing and that I might feel an overwhelming desire to drink tomorrow. One episode of not drinking or using drugs when either is available doesn't mean I'm "cured". I'll never be able to use any form of drug again. My recent relapse after almost 5 sober years has proved that to me. These meetings are great. I can sit down at my computer every night and be at a meeting. An no one says "I'll pass" here!


Member: Georgiana
Location: Toronto, Canada
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 01:19:32

Comments

Darn, I've lost track of all the people I was going to say encouraging things to... but then and again, I kinda need to hear them myself, so I'll say them anyway.

AA didn't just give me my life back - it gave me life, period, and continues to do so. Staying sober is certainly a wonderful benefit of working the program, but it's the connection with the God that I have come to understand and all the people both in and outside of the fellowship that has really made a huge difference to me.

That slogan "You Are No Longer Alone" may sound really cheesy, or trite, or downright crazy - but I find it to be so true. Now that I've been in the program and sober for a while, for the first time in my life I feel like I am loved and valued just for being me, and that I'm accepted with all my quirks, warts, and downright nasty bits. We are more similar than different - we're all alcoholics, we're all just a wee bit crazy as a result, and perhaps most importantly, we've all found something through this program and fellowship that keeps us sober and saner than we would be otherwise.

The other saying I can't help but think of is "Don't quit before the miracle happens". Sometimes it takes a while to 'get' the program. Although I stayed in once I came in (and it still took me a long time to catch on; in fact I might always be working on that!), a lot of people don't - but you can always, always come back. My heart still breaks when I hear about people 'slipping', because I know that this disease definitely kills people and I fear what might happen to someone who goes back out, but conversely when someone comes back, I'll be incredibly happy for them. I remember a while back at my group there was a person who was really struggling to stay sober, usually not managing to, but they kept coming to meetings anyway, and somehow our hope kept them going when they didn't have any of their own - and then I don't know what happened, but something changed; now they've been sober for quite a while, and their outlook has done a complete about face. Goodness, if I think of what kind of a mess I was a few years back, how surprised I was on my 20th birthday (I'm 23 now, so does that make me a 'baby' too?!?) because I didn't think I'd live to see the end of my teens, the absolute despair that was my constant companion, and compare that state of affairs to my current one - well, I like to say sometimes that I'm grateful for the sorts of problems I've got now, 'cause if it weren't for AA I wouldn't have homework to worry about (I wouldn't have been able to go to university), or a relationship to fuss over (the sort of people who want to be with a drunk are not the kind I want to be with myself!), etc., etc. It truly is amazing....

And I suppose I should say something about the topic. Substitution... hmmm... I certainly went for sugar in a big way, and I still do. I remember hearing recently of a new approach to treating alcoholism based partly on the premise that we alcoholics don't metabolize sugars in general the way 'normies' do, not just alcohol in particular - looking after one's diet is a big part of the regimen (I can't remember whether or not AA was suggested), including giving up simple sugars like chocolate 'cause our systems can't cope with them properly. I had an interesting experience this spring that makes me suspect this might be true for me. For Lent, which is a time of penitence and self denial in the Christian tradition, I gave up chocolate. I got withdrawal symptoms like headaches for quite a while, and horrendous cravings as well. The really strange part was when I started eating it again at Easter. I could feel the 'buzz' from a single little chocolate egg hit my brain, and it was eerily similar to the initial 'hit' I'd get from a drink. So far, though, it hasn't scared me enough to give up chocolate for good!

I can certainly use anything in an addictive or compulsive fashion, and it's quite linked to depression for me too. When I'm really low, I will do just about anything to make myself feel better, and in the past that included drinking, 'cause once I was drunk, or preferably in a blackout, I wouldn't feel anything at all. Learning to bear hurt without immediately reaching for something to take it away has been one of the major challenges of my sobriety - along with letting people see said hurt rather than trying to pretend like everything's all hunky dory (the fifth step was absolutely vital for me, and truly honest sharing in discussion meetings is really important for my day to day sanity now).

Blather blather blather. It's definitely time for sleep (that hungry, angry, lonely, or tired business - any of them is a recipe for disaster for me, and I tend to fall flat on my face on the last one at the best of times!).

I'm really glad to have found this meeting. Hang in there, everybody....


Member: Katie A
Location: TN USA
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 06:36:51

Comments

There's a book called 'living Sober". it's yellow and in paperbook form. Avalable at local Innergroup office if not at your metting place.

I need to find and read it this time when I get back to the program. Had 17 days. Slipped one, went back 4. Then got offered a job, went onto training last week and drank beer every night.

Didn't do mass quantities like I did before, b/c I was so tired and knew I had to get up really early. Isn't this (ME) just SO insane!!!

I'm not fooled into thinking I can control alcohol. It will kick my butt HARD again if I continue. History WILL repeat itself,b/c I AM an alcoholic.

i believe also that this is largely a sugar metabolism deal. But also that it's a three legged stool. Spiritual, Emotional and Physical.

I do reduce or fix the discomfort of not drinking with candy and soda and kool aid, especially in first week. i think (and I do THAT too much too) that I need to find other NEW or rediscovered things to do besides an injested fix.

Setvice work certainly, but also some kind of regular exercise (natural endorphins are produced) ,hobbies, maybe learn an new language.

Seems like what ever I do, i'm compulsive about it. If AA, then AA all the time. Can't think of anything other than when's the next meeting.

Wonder if I can work and go to meetings at same time. That probably sounds stupid, but I'm really wondering. Get so tired, like after the 14 hour days this week.

Thanks to all who shared. God bless!


Member: Christina L.
Location: Somewhere out in the Pacific
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 12:13:15

Comments

Hi folks. I love this site. When I need a quick pick-me-up I sign on. I live on a group of islands about an 8 hr ferry ride (depending on the weather) off the north coast of BC. Small community (400 people) and even smaller meeting so this is wonderful.

When I first sobered up I ate snickers bars. I start "ballooning" at an alarming rate and everyone said I could worry about the weight later, that my body was craving sugar. Well after a weight gain of some 45 pounds I went through a time of horrendous emotional pain and lost 65 pounds. Not a good way to do it. Now I'm back up there, substituting food for alcohol. Don't know what it is about me but I am easily addicted. After nine years of sobriety, if I am spiritually in touch, then I learn. Still have a thick head but eventually things do get through. I am grateful I didn't drink yesterday and it felt so good I think I'll try it again today.

Regarding the spiritual side of the program I was told a few things when I was new which really helped me. The first was that GOD stands for "Good Orderly Direction" not some little old man with a long gray beard who's going to strike me dead if I do the wrong thing. Secondly I was told "Religion is for people who are trying to save themselves from hell while Spirituality is for those of us who have been there". Sure helped me.

I always have to keep my ego in check when I think I can help someone else. All I can is share my experience strength and hope and that is what keeps me sober on a daily basis. Thank you all for sharing.


Member: DonF
Location: nh
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 14:25:31

Comments

DonF, alcoholic. Some great feedback here for Luke, JoeS, and others, who are searching, and have asked for help, the first step to success. But JoeS, be careful about being selective who you get help from. Prayer, even when we're not sure who we're praying to, or deny that there is any Being superior to humans, is beneficial because it gives us humility. Believe that we believe, don't reject our message because we believe. Religious pride, or anti-religious pride can hold back our progress, because we're keeping ourself in charge. "Left to my own devices, I would have drunk again". Our Higher Power, if relied upon, will save our ass. Some of us may then become interested in saving our soul. "Religion" is not required. Just spirituality. Keep an open mind. Don't drink. Go to meetings. Ask for help. Let it happen.


Member: Annie A
Location: NY
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 14:40:10

Comments

Hi! I'm new here but today I decided that it was time to turn in my crown as Happy Hour Queen! I have been drinking since I was 15 and up until the past few years it was mostly social and manageable. I am 38 now and have been drinking every afternoon/eve for about the past year. I start off with a few beers but then keep going so I consume a six-pack or even eight at times. I am a stay at home Mom with much to be thankful for but apparently I have a self-destructive nature. I find myself getting bored and restless around 4PM(although I do come up with a multitude of other excuses to crack a Bud) and hence happy hour starts. My husband works nights and though I'm ususally through with Happy Hour by 8 or 8:30 and functionable the next day, it scares me that I have become so addicted to this ritual. It has caused some problems between hubby and I and I find myself being short or starting arguments with him when I drink too much (which is what happened the past two nights in a row) I feel like an idiot because my father was an arrested alcholic for most of my life and I should know better. Every morning I wake up and say I'm not going to do it again today, but then 4:00 rolls around and I find myself going to the deli. I keep trying to figure out why I need to start my evening this way but have not been very successful. It scares me to think about how out of hand this has gotten and what a lousy impression it's giving my grade school children to see Mom drinking beer every nite (even tho I disguise it by using a glass). I am too embarrassed to go to AA meetings for fear one the school moms will find out plus I don't really have anyone to watch my kids that frequently. So my question is: Does anyone know of an on-line meeting I could join that maybe will help me get through Happy Hour? I don't have AOL. Also I am an avid reader and will look into the book Living Sober. I am open to any other book suggestions as well. And any suggestions on what to do during the hours I usually drink. I am also an artist but the time is not condusive to painting since I do need to be available for my kids. You would think an intelligent person with interests would not haave fallen into this scenario but here I am. I guess I really like drinking and the buzz I get but obviously need substitute suggestions. Your input is greatly appreciated as I really would like to retire from my throne! Thanks so much!


Member: Christa
Location: USA
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 16:15:54

Comments

Annie,

You can spend your time on the computer with a pot of tea reading this site. The coffee pot here usually has a lot of posts to read through, you hear other opinions and can respond to them. You may even want to e-mail one or the other person who is open to this.

Also, there is a new forum that you could check out: http://www.delphi.com/recoveredalkies

Good luck. The drinking problem really doesn't get better, it only gets worse. The fact that you came here is a good first step. By the way, I have been sober for 5 weeks now.


Member: Annie A
Location: NY
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 18:29:23

Comments

Thanks so much for responding. My neighboe just called for me to come over and share a few beers. The temptation is outrageous! God, I'm so ashamed of myself for being in this situation and not being able to control it. Unfortunately, I hate yea, live on coca-cola when I'm not drinking and keep telling myself one more beer won' t make a difference. How do you all get past this?


Member: jenn
Location: down south
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 20:19:52

Comments

For Annie: Find a sitter or child care swap and go to a meeting. People in the meeting rooms will protect your anonymity. I am the mother of two precious boys who I almost lost to this fearsome disease. I, too, was a stay at home Mom sipping my chardonnays starting promptly at five. I started noticing a bad routine, but did nothing to stop it. Within two years it had escalated to round the clock drinking, three visits to the hospital (one of which an accidental sleeping pill overdose which almost killed me). Finally, my husband left me and took our children. He would only let me back into their lives if I went to treatment and completed the 28 day program. It saved my life. I am coming up on two years now and would not trade my sobriety for anything in the world. I could not have done it without the program of AA. You are doing the right thing by taking this seriously, it is more serious than most people know. Beer is alcohol and it is easy to be an alcoholic even if you only drink just beer. Don't wait until you wake up shaking at 3:00 am and can't go back to sleep until you gulp a warm glass of scotch like I did. Get help now. Make it a priority. You deserve it, and so do your children. It doesn't fool anyone to drink it out of a glass, its your personality and the changes in your life, morals, and attitudes that are apparent. Good luck. Please give the program a try. sober and happy (and a better parent because of it.)


Member: Michael
Location: AZ
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 21:52:46

Comments

Hi! My name is Michael, and I am a recovering alcoholic, sober today only by the grace of God and the Fellowship. Welcome to all the newcomers! And good topic, Christa!

I remember when I first started going to AA that sometimes I would hear warnings about substituting our obsession for alcohol with another obsession, and this warning, fortunately, still plays an important role in my program of living sober today.

Yes, I had that obsession for sweets in my early sobriety--king size candy bars, several of them. But then I found out I had diabetes, so, begrudgingly, I gave up that obsession.

More importantly for me, I have to watch out for my obsessive tendencies causing me to beat myself up or produce some type of emotional hangover. I also have to watch out for obsessing over career goals or responsibilities, which can result in me placing my professional life ahead of my AA life.

Fortunately, as I mentioned, I have taken that early warning about substituting one obsession for another to heart so far, although in early sobriety this can sometimes be unavoidable and even a necessary temporary relief valve for dealing with a much worse obsession.


Member: Ann A
Location: MD
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 22:18:00

Comments

Hi! I'm Ann & I'm an alcoholic. Through the program of alcoholics Anonymous i have been able to stay sober for several YEARS (!I thought a week was an eternity at first!) beleive it or not! And I do not say that to boast but to show the program works. My sobriety is a direct result of my willingness to work the steps and God's grace, no more, no less. Today, I have no more seizures, no more swearing off the booze followed by the confusion after another, and another, and another drunk. I have beautiful children, a satisfying marriage, an okay career, and most importantly an ability to deal with the problems that come down the pike as they come down the pike. When drinking Problems snowballed as I went on another bender. Problems happened because of my benders! Big ones! Jailed for DWI, cars wrecked, even raped once. I was a blackout drinker. Who knows what I can't remember is the scarriest sometimes. Today I do not have to worry about that! So what's going on here in MD with General Services? Mike says that you have to pay for the dance if you want the AA? Isn't that out of line with the traditions? The traditions keep the fellowship intact and maintain AAs integrity. Sometimes things get out of line with traditions and it is so sad because it threatens our ability to recover from a disease that will kill without a solution. It is a life or death errand here in AA as far as I am concerned. Without AA a drunk like me will die. Why does the dance HAVE to be a part of the AA? Not that dances are bad (Of course they are fun!) but the big book doesn't include that as a suggestion for recovery from alcoholism! What do you people think? Dances are fun, sober can get together and dance (if they want) but should we call it "AA"? Absolutely not! AA is not a dance, it is a program of recovery! Thanks for sharing Mike. What is the solution when people are out of line with the traditions? You emphasized "groups" rather than individuals. What are you talking about? Keep coming back! I hope AA is here long from now! What is going on?


Member: cassie d
Location: in
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 22:26:53

Comments

hello everyone...well i went to my first AA meeting last night! wow! Im not alone, it makes me feel good to come here too! thank you, all of you for sharing...cassred@yahoo.com ive been sober 48 hrs..cassie


Member: Cindy L
Location: east coast
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 22:30:05

Comments

Hi, I'm Cindy, alcoholic. I drink anything non-alcoholic except so called non-alcoholic beer beacuse it has alcohol in it.

dances are for people who want to go to them. AA is for people who want AA. Sometimes AA people go to dances. Dances are not AA.

Just my 2cents.


Member: Mike P
Location: MD
Date: 18 Sep 1999
Time: 23:09:53

Comments

Ultimately alls I can do is see that me and my homegroup are in line with the traditions. Though I am only one vice and sometimes I am out voted - hopefully God's conscience is realized. Tradition two.

Your question was why does the dance have to be a part of AA. Answer: Fear. Let me explain.

Some individuals beleive Alcoholics Anonymous is on a membership drive. The truth is that whenever people gather for the purpose of sobriety "each day somewhere in the world, recovery begins when one alcoholic talks with another alcoholic, sharing experience, strength, and hope."

In theory enough people should want to show up at a conference with no dance to cover expenses. People supporting AA. But I beleive, and this is where the fear is based, that the majority of people are not interested in the convention but are attracted to the dance! So without the dance not enough people would register to cover the convention.

Hence, the dance finances the AA. A Test to Maryland General Services:

Try putting on a convention without a dance and see if the expenses are covered.

After all, we gather to share our experience, strength, and hope. And the Miracle of Our Solution.


Member: John L
Location: Newark
Date: 19 Sep 1999
Time: 00:12:47

Comments

Hi my names John alkie/addict What do you do to get through Good Days I just atended two weddings today,,,one sober one not,,and the problem is i had more fun at the drunks wedding then the sober one. I'm really scared that i'm becoming a dry drunk, I didn't drink but it would have been real easy to do.and i'm really scared,,because it was a really good day,and i'm scared if i have another like it .so I guest what i'd like to talk about is staying sober in good times or bad!!!thanks john 9/19/99


Member: Sherry O
Location: Canada
Date: 19 Sep 1999
Time: 00:32:21

Comments

Hi,my name is Sherry & Im a definite Acoholic!! Im on only 3 weeks of sobriety but everyday counts for me when I get through the day!!! Im finding Im replacing acohol with overdoing it! Im working twice as hard & my house is SPOTLESS!! Its kinda like I just cant stop doing things. The hardest is not stoppping at the bar to just have "one quick drink" with my so called friends. Im drinking lots of water but I am sure noticing that Im very tired & sluggish. Eating lots of fruit also but I sure have the sugar cravings. Unfortunatly I cannot afford to eat sugar because of my weight but Im finding the water really helps. This may sound silly but without the internet I really think I wouldnt have quit. I've found a whole new way of finding help. Concerned people are replacing my drinking buddies(thank god)! Anyway,I love reading everyone else's messages as it gives me hope that I can make it. Thank you all! Sherry