Member: Georgiana
Location: Toronto
Date: 6/4/00
Time: 11:14:31 PM

Comments

Wow, I can't believe I'm the first one here... and wouldn't you know it, this is the time when my normally creative brain decides to go on holiday.

*sigh*

Oh, here's one - I just got to my home group for the first time in nearly six weeks, due to a whole pile of travelling (great fun!), and it was such a relief to be back among my 'family'. So how's home groups as a topic? I hope I'm not excluding people who don't have one - I'm sure you have just as much to say about them!

Anyway, my group has become a key part of my recovery over the past few years. It's one place where I feel totally accepted, usually understood, and always loved and supported. Don't get me wrong, I like other meetings quite well, I just have a hard time picturing what my sobriety would be like without this particular bunch of crazy ex-drunks....


Member: Giber
Location: Wyoming
Date: 6/4/00
Time: 11:20:39 PM

Comments

How about the promises on pages 83 and 84. If I would have known about these when I was active, I probably would have called Bull ! I never thought that there was anything out there that could give me anything else but pure misery. I thought that the only thing I had going for me was to medicate myself everyday, just to make life seem bearable. There was no such things as promises. All the promises I looked for were imposible to find. Until I found this deal they call AA. What a deal it is. When I first read the promises, I thought the same thing as I would have before Bull! Was I ever wrong. Through this deal we call AA. I have found some of these to come true. Today I do feel a Happiness I've never experienced. I feel serenity like I,ve never felt before. All I had to do was to believe that if I trusted in a higher power, the fellowship of AA, and practiced it's principles in all my affairs, these promises can and will come true. I am a very greatful alcoholic today. I am greatful for this program and all those who belong. If I keep working this program and continue to listen to the message, all the other promises will come in time. I am convinced of that. God Bless


Member: Mike N.
Location: Eastman GA.
Date: 6/4/00
Time: 11:58:35 PM

Comments

I'm Mike an alcoholic. I thank GOD for my home group. I guess GOD knew i was coming because we have eleven meetings a week. Being new to AA 3 months 16 days i need all the meetings i can get. (Sometimes quickly sometimes slowly). An oldtimer told me when i came in that if i would put as much in AA as i did alcohol there wouldn't be any problem hanging in there. It's good to have a new freedom and anew happiness. It's also good to have a group of people (now friends). That say keep coming back and realy mean it. I'm also glad to have found this website.It helps alot to.Thans for letting me share.


Member: delia m
Location: Redding, California
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 12:59:06 AM

Comments

i am wanting to reach out for help. i have been drinking for the last three years, after 23 years of sobriety thanks to AA. but i have had three years of drinking, and now i am in a very miserable state of mind and body, thanks to me going back to booze. i am very lost. i cannot just shut it off, i have tried. i am needing help to stop. my life has been falling apart, and it is getting worse every day.


Member: Al C.
Location: Florida
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 2:00:11 AM

Comments

I'm an alcoholic named Al. A home group is one of the "tools" of the program that you don't hear talked about a whole lot, but I found helped me alot. In my drinking I was not a social person at all; I kept to myself and sort of lived life in a "box". Of course that's the person I brought to AA. I slid in the door, didn't say much, if anything, and slid back out the door after the meeting. Yea I said "how ya doin" to a few people but I pretty much stayed in my "box". I was afraid to be known by you people because surely you wouldn't like me. I had to learn to change because my way wasn't getting me any better and I was tired of hurting. I had to force myself to share at meetings. Then I had to force myself to share honestly about what was going on with me and what I was experiencing in sobriety. A home group helped me to do this because I saw the same people almost everyday. I actually liked these people and felt comfortable with them. Slowly I opened up and let people know me and I got to know them. This may seem insignificant, but to my sobriety it was huge. To me this program is all about change, and a home group helped me to change a major character defect. I was blocking myself from reaping alot of benefits this program has to offer me. And I found you can stay just as sick as you want to in AA too, there are no magic pills. It's little things practiced daily that make big things come about. Then I look around and see another one of the promises coming true in my life. This has been a long process for me but a life saving and a life fulfilling one. You know, the longer I'm sober the more I need AA. Thanks for the topic(s).


Member: Sheri F
Location: Portland, OR
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 2:05:25 AM

Comments

Hi Delia M. I'm Sheri with 22 year of continuous soberity. I can't tell you about AA, you could tell me but I do know that the ONLY wa I could get sober and STAY sober was to go to those stupid meetings and raise my hand. Pride is my WORST character defect and to raise my hand again would be rough. Perhaps de-tox is needed? Treatment center? Recovery House? You have taken the first step and signed on here.. the rest can't be as bad as what you are feeling now. Come on home, try a different meeting, not your home group, might be easier. I pray that you take the second step while you can. My prayers are with you and just remember, you are not alone, God loves you and so do I. Keep coming back!!!!!! sheri 22 slfrey@Yahoo.com


Member: Dean S
Location: Phoenix, Az
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 4:38:29 AM

Comments

Hi!! My name is Dean and I'm an alcoholic.

Delia M., You have, as Sheri just said, made the move toward getting back. I feel your pain and hope you get to a meeting today. You know you will be welcomed back with loving arms. I know, I've been there. But that was over 28 years ago and A.A. has not changed.

This is where a Home Group can be so valuable to it's members. There should be no reason for a person to fear going back to their friends for a new start. The Home Group is the backbone of my A.A. program. I recently selected a new Home Group and have been welcomed as if I had been there forever. It just makes it much easier to share - and that is of extreme importance to me. I need to know that whatever I say will ber held in strict confidence. I trust the people in my Home Group and commit myself to help any of them in any way that I can. Every member of our Group has the telephone number of everyone else. It is very reassuring to know that someone is going to be available if I have a pressing need for an A.A. contact. I know I can count on anyone of them. It also gives me a feeling of being "a part of", and it makes me responsible to be available to them. Thanks for allowing me to share.

Thanks for your love. Thanks for my life. Dean


Member: carla s
Location: Texas
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 10:15:36 AM

Comments

Hi,my name is Carla & I'm an acholic!I have drank for alomst 25 years of my 36 years of living- but it has been just in the last few years that I have become an over drinker (drinking until I can't remember) and doing things I would NOT do if I was sober. I stopped drinking a week ago, but I have hurt EVERYONE in my life, Lost my husband of 21 years & I am at my whits end. If anyone has any wisdom as to how I can TRY to gain my life back, PLEASE let me know.


Member: Kristin L. (10 yrs.)
Location: Cent. OH
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 10:38:13 AM

Comments

To Delia and Carla: Please don't let this disease shame you into not getting to a face to face meeting. That's what it wants to do. That and help you suffer until you die. I say help because once I have the solution (AA)it is I who helps the disease by choosing to stay in active alcoholism. Please, the only shame is in not coming back. It is amazing to me how this thing tells us that the very people who helped us before and who suffer the same disease will now chastize us for drinking. It is time to stop dwelling on the problem and step into the solution. I will pray for you...

On homegroups: My homegroup is my home in AA. I am of service there, I attend weekly so the mewcommer sees consistency, It is family. Any meeting is and I can help set-up or tear-down any meeting but it's different at my homegroup. I am helping to make it attractive since this is a program of attraction rather than promotion.

Hugs!!!


Member: anon.
Location:
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 11:16:17 AM

Comments

Alky here to throw out a bit of perspective. I have seen some home groups that were suffering from the dysfunction alcoholic families endure. Some seem to grow while others are stagnated by the same ole'"stuff". Anyone else grow and heal enough to recognize this sort of "stuff"?


Member: MICHELLE S
Location: LETHBRIDGE, ALBERTA, CANADA
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 11:30:10 AM

Comments

to Delia and Carla, suck up whats left of your pride and just go to a meeting. When I went they told me that you'll never have to do your first meeting again.

I think the importance of a home group is the same as the importance of a sponsor. It's another tool in the battle to stay sober. When I picked my sponsor, it wasn't because of any great wisdom I thought she might have, but if I were ever, ever to pick up another drink again I thought she would kick my butt clear across the country and back. For me I needed that structure to help me stay sober in those first brutal months. My home group is merely an extension of that. If I even THINK about taking a drink, I think to all the members of that group whose concern for me goes further than weather or not I stay sober today. If my sponsor can't answer a question I might have I know I can approach anyone in my group and they will try to help me.

I hit eight months sobriety today, am now asked to chair meetings and once again feel as though I have something to contribute to life. Wishing everyone another 24...


Member: Fred M
Location: MD
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 11:42:38 AM

Comments

I'm Fred and I'm an alcoholic, sober today by he grace of God and the fellowship of AA.

\\\Carla:\\\ I don't have any wisdom, just what AA taught me. They taught me to pray, go to meetings, do what I'm told to do at the meetings, and not drink today, no matter what. I think the wisdom contained in these simple steps is so profound that they outweigh all of the philosophy and other advice you will receive. See you at a face to face meeting soon, I hope. We love you and want to help you stay sober and get your life back.

Home groups: mine is the greatest. These people are so loving and fired up about life that they will be stuck with me until God calls me home. I swear I could confess anything, express any thought, share any of my wild drunk experiences, and they'd still say "Keep coming back!" and really mean it. I feel absolute peace and saftey there, more than in any other setting. I wish what I have in my home group on every alcoholic. It is a blessed gift from my Higher Power. Thanks for letting me share. Love, Fred


Member: Susy
Location: Washington
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 12:26:13 PM

Comments

Hello, my name is Susy and I'm an alcoholic.A home group, I don't know what I would do without it.When I first started attending AA meetings, I would not share much. My home group gave me a sense of security. I was able to open up and share,and grow as an individual as I learned more about myself.There are a number of people in my group with lots of years of sobriety amongst them. I learn so much from them.Kristin I like what you said about AA being a program of attraction rather than promotion.Also, as a newcomer it is reasuring to see the same faces.Thank you


Member: Justin k
Location: NY
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 1:00:04 PM

Comments

Hi, i`m Justin and i`m an addict alcoholic, i was wondering if anyone is here right now?


Member: Mike J.
Location: Montgomery, AL
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 1:40:20 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Mike and I'm an alcoholic. Much like a few of the comments I have read, I believe a home group is the backbone of my recovery plan. I have only been sober for roughly three months, but when I first started attending meetings I was very quiet and reserved. At the first five or six meetings(which I attended very irregularly), I saw many of the same faces. I said to myself, "Wow, these people are really committed to staying sober, this is where I need to be." Seeing those same faces everytime I went made me comfortable and able to finally suck it up and share. When I walked out of that meeting, it was like I was on "cloud nine" or something. I felt like a tremendous weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I am forever grateful to those members who showed me that life without alcohol can be so much better than life with alcohol and PMS(pain, misery, sorrow). Thanks to all of you members who help out newcomers like me. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: John B.
Location: Colorado
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 3:29:02 PM

Comments

Hello John alki here. since coming into the program over six years ago, it was stress to get a home group. since then I've had two. The first was very good with a lot of long term sobrity. But as my time grew there were very few new comers. So when a new meeting started at the AA club in town I jumped. It is here that I found what I needed some long term aling with new members. We are a growing group and one that believes in taking a group inventory so that we don't get old and stuffy. The new members coming in are attracted by our solution not the problem format. we center on today. The group is very active in area and believes that God wants us to be happy joyous and free.Today it is the most important tool in my tool box. I get me out of me, and the members know when I'm full of it, enven when I say I'm fine.Keep coming back. To the posters who are trying to get back to the rooms. Open the door and walk in the coffee's on and the fellowship is free.God bless.


Member: Jennifer K.
Location: Centerville, LA
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 3:30:25 PM

Comments

Hi! My name is Jennifer and I'm an alcoholic. God, it feels so good to say that again. Funny that I come here, looking for a ray of hope, or perhaps just a little sign, and i find a discussion on home groups. I was sober for 4 years, and about a year ago I decided that I knew what was best for me and that I could handle just a couple once in a while. I lived in Washington when I was sober. Now, I live in Louisiana, and got a DWI about 1 1/2 months ago. From that nite on, i knew that i am drunk, no ifs ands or buts about it. Now, I'm looking for that thing that I had at one time, that special cameraderie that you find within your home group. The friendships that I made in my homegroup have still lasted even thru my relapse. I am truly grateful for all those in my homegroup in Washington who said what i needed to hear, before i knew that's what i needed to hear. So, from one drunk to the next, thank you for one more day of sobriety.


Member: JudithS
Location: home
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 4:35:58 PM

Comments

my name is judith and I'm an alcoholic.

I returned to my home group last week after nearly 5 years of being "out there".

Yes, I was very nervous walking through the door and yes I think it took alot of courage to go. But I did it.

And I am so glad. I got such a welome, so many hugs and kisses. so many good wishes, so much love.

So for anyone who is nervous about going back - please dont be. I feel great, refreshed and reborn. I feel that maybe this time I will understand what I'm doing with the help of my HP.

Delia, Carla, you can do it. Ask for help its there...

thank you all


Member: MUDFLY
Location: GODS COUNTRY
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 5:58:08 PM

Comments

JENNIFER K. DUI'S SUCK AS I KNOW,JUST CONSIDER THIS AS A WAKEUP CALL FROM A HIGHER POWER!!! DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR DRIVERS LICENCE??MAYBE YOU CAN TAKE US TO A MEETING SOMETME.

MUDFLY


Member: JL Gray
Location: The Beach, California
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 6:40:30 PM

Comments

Would you set your alarm on Saturday AND Sunday morning? At 05:30? That is what I do so I can make it to my home group. I go every week day I can too, but that is on the way to work, and I might as well get out of bed anyway. When new in AA, I am now just 6 months, quite a few people told me to shop around for a home group. I didn't, I chose the one closed to my house. It has saved my life to know that I can go there at just about anytime to talk to recovering alcoholics, the morning meeting is what fits my schedule best.

Where else would you go where there a bunch of people saying that they feel comfortable? In cold metal chairs? This is where I found my sponsor. This is where we pray out loud. Meetings can very from a couple of dozen alkies during the week to over one hundred on the weekends. We start with the serenity prayer, and also read the 3rd and 7th step prayers and finish up with the serenity prayer. One hundred voices do make a powerful statement. It has meant to me so much to be accepted in person and as a person. To be welcomed. To learn what this program is all about. I had no idea.

I also like the randomness of it all. I have been asked to lead twice. I did not know this until 5 minutes before the meeting began. Isn't that great! No time to prepare or think. I got to call on people that I wanted to hear from. Once, tired of calling on people, and I don't know too many names, I just sat there and waited for someone to raise their hand. It was quite funny, really no one volunteered, until the silence became uncomfortable. The leader gets to call whom they wish, so I could be asked to share at any time.

I really enjoy all the sharing of your stories on the web. But in my home group I can hear from the person's voice in his accent how he was living in a cardboard box under a bridge in London somewhere, coming from a family in which it was expected that you drink and use drugs, even at a very young age. . Now he lives in Southern California. Comes to the morning meeting and has been sober 13 years. Gotta love this program.

I have attended a variety of meetings now that I am travelling quite a bit and each home group runs their meetings differently. I get something from each one. Many people say that they go here and there to meetings, broadening their experience. Let me tell you, I have seen so many come and go, it's mind boggling. Many show up back to where they got sober, in their home group just for celebrating their soberversaries. This happens all the time. "I now live on the east coast, but came back to celebrate 14 years."

Home is where the heart is. Great topic.

And since it seems that two parallel discussions are running here, the actual promises is something for the newcomer, since I did not see it here above and not everyone has read the BB. I heard the promises in my home group and had to read them for myself.

"We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves."


Member: GREGG G.
Location: KENNEWICK, WA
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 9:22:24 PM

Comments


Member: GREGG G.
Location: KENNEWICK, WA
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 9:22:27 PM

Comments


Member: GREGG G.
Location: KENNEWICK, WA
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 9:22:30 PM

Comments


Member: Shannon S.
Location: California
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 9:33:53 PM

Comments

Hello everyone! Shannon alcoholic here. A home group was very important to me in early sobriety and still is. I don't think I would have made it this far without those familiar faces because ny higher power speaks to me through people. But the longer I stay sober the larger my home group can become. I have been blessed to attend meeting in a few other states and cyberspace. Because of God I can be at home anywhere. What a gift! If I'm really in it for any reason I make sure I tell my home group and others as well. Can't afford secrets. If you're new face to face might be best. I could never have typed myself sober. Best wishes to you all for a lifetime of sobriety!


Member: Theresa G
Location: Louisville, Ky
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 10:35:37 PM

Comments

I too feel a home group is important. I have been sober for 91/2 years and I did not get involved in my home group untill the third year of my sobriety I was going crazy with other things, Members in this home group seen this and suggsted I get involved and this turned my life around I will always be grateful for this.


Member: Arlene M
Location: wv
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 11:22:07 PM

Comments

Hi everyone Arlene here and alcolholic. Dela and Karla use your phone book if you don't have one call information if you don't have a phone go to the hospital, of course that is if you want to live. My home group is very important to me. They have supported me threw thick and thin that is where I met my sponsor plus some of y very best friends in the world. I went there no matter what. Today I try to help others and let them know that a homegoup is so important, just by starting to make coffee for some people I did not know has led me where I am today. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Vera
Location: San Francisco
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 11:25:17 PM

Comments

Hi, my name is Vera and I am an alcoholic. It's so good to be here. My home meeting helped preserve my sanity.

God bless you all!!!


Member: Michael G.
Location: Dallas
Date: 6/5/00
Time: 11:28:24 PM

Comments

I'm Michael and I AM an alcoholic. I relapsed after three years of sobriety and drank for about a year and a half until last November. I didn't go back to my home group for my first meeting. As Sheri F. said, it was easier to go to a new meeting. Not easy, but easier. After a couple of weeks I did go back to my home group without any embarassment. There was no judgement there. Only love and understanding. I now go to both groups regularly, but the new group is my home. They are both so different. I feel lucky to be able to go to any meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous any time, any where. For me, I feel a deep bond with my new home group because they were there in the beginning of my recovery. When I walk into a meeting there the old-timers smile and tell me that I'm helping them stay sober. God, I love AA.


Member: Pat R.
Location: Biloxi, Ms.
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 1:48:46 AM

Comments

My name is Pat and I am an Alcoholic.I got sober in Sarasota Fl. I found the YANA club there and made it my homegroup. They had between eight and ten meetings a day and when I got there I was no "Vision For You". I had lost everything :family, money, kids were in protective custody. I had used up the insurance on treatment and relapsed again. After six months of wrestling that bear again I had a moment of clarity. Here I am again flat on my back with my best friends at my side...The four Horsemen: terror, Bewilderment, Frustration and Despair.I felt like no one in the world could feel as much emotional and physical upheaval as I felt. I had been in treatment long enough to know that there was only one hope for a hopeless drunk like me ...AA... I can remember thinking to myself it would be nice to get my life back but I relly don't care anymore I just don't want to drink anymore and I can't stop. So when I walked in that door and they started reading How It Works I started crying like a baby because I knew I was Home. I attended almost every meeting they had there, everyday for the first six months. I had no place else to go I was sleeping on a friends couch and going to meetings all day everyday. My sponsor finnaly kicked me out and made me find a job. He lovingly walked me through the steps and listned to endless hours of babble. I had to move to Memphis and boy was I scared. The first thing I did was find a home group. Now I live in Biloxi Ms. and the first thing I did was find a home group. It didn't really matter if they were dysfunctional or not. I needed a place close to home and convenient. If your home group is a little blasse find another one or better yet get involved and see if you can make a small positive change.AA taught me to try and always focus on the positive and I'm getting better at that all the time. So when you walk into that first AA meeting or are comming back with tire tracks all across your back, remember that everyone allready there knows the pain you are in on a first hand basis and they have gotten their lives back. So this is a topic about the Promises because of my sticking with My Home group where ever it was I have been rocketed into that fourth dimension of which I had never dreamed. All the promises have come true for me and all I wanted was to not drink anymore. If Some psychic old timer had walked up to me and told me " you will pick up your nine yr. chip in Paris France I would have gotten as far away from that guy as I could...Well my band was playing in a BAR in paris France and I picked up my Nine yr. chip in Paris France. My Higher Power has done a much better job of planning my Sobriety than I ever could. Nothing has turned out the way I thought or wanted it to, but I did get my kids back and I'm grateful for the NEW Life that AA has given me. Keep Comming Back are the most important words in My program for in doing that i never forget things I'm suppsed to be doing and the things I'm not supposed to be doing. Love to All...Pat


Member: angela b
Location: virginia
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 2:11:51 AM

Comments

angela alcoholic here. saved by the grace and aa. Carla, your not alone. i too had lost every thing, family, friends, money, house, job, selfrepect, when i finally surrendered to the aa way of life. 5 years and alot of coffee later i have a job, family, friends, money, house and selfrespect. but most importantly i have a relationship with a higher power. newly sober i was like a child looking into the room i had destroyed and my higher power told me," NOW IT'S TIME TO CLEAN UP YOUR ROOM." first things first, all these folks taking about a home group. find a meeting commit to a home group. the people of my home group loved me when i couldnt love myself. one very smart man explained it to me this way, he said "you cant save your face and your ass at the same time." truer words have never been spoken. be praying for ya.


Member: gypsy
Location: valparaiso,in
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 2:55:01 AM

Comments

homegroups... how God works in mysterious ways. i have been away from AA for months. i had a major falling out with my sponsor over some pretty serious stuff about myself she decided to share with another sponsee. this just days before sharing my 4th with her. since then i have drank hit bottom and prayed for the desire for a drink to be removed (as she told me to do) and it was. only of course with time and a major dry drunk i did it again. so i thought maybe if no one could see my face and the anger and resentment that surely wears itself so well on me, just maybe someone would hear me and not judge me. yes, i feel if i go back to my home group, as my whole being longs to do, they will judge me. she is a matriarch around there, or so i feel. i know i am sick and being absolutely selfish and self-righteous, but i cannot just turn off my feelings any more. now, i have moved my residence again. not so far, but far enough to make even trying to connect as fully as i almost had so hard. so many changes... sometimes i wonder if it will ever give. maybe i sound melodramatic but i really feel like i am at the end of my proverbial rope and some kind of miracle has to happen. the worst of it is that its not stopping drinking anymore. i mean, it use to be the biggest issue of it. now its staying stopped and giving myself time to get well. it seems that every time i start feeling recovery take over and selfishness and resentment fading, something happens to kill any happiness i could have. how could she do this to me??? i know its been months, but i have never, ever trusted anyone but her!!! i want my homegroup back, i want to feel like i belong again, i want to walk into a room where people dont think im too strange to associate with, i want someone to listen to me and take me seriously again. not in a clinical way either. i mean i have a counselor and you can only be told so many times why you drink. well no shit. can someone hear me? has anyone ever felt this way? can i ever go home and not feel like an outcast? im so glad that this meeting exists, maybe it is my miracle. please help me...


Member: Jack B
Location: CUMBOLA, PA
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 2:55:23 AM

Comments

Hi I am Jack a real alcoholic, great topic. I am a firm believer that the hope for an alcoholic is seeing another alcoholic recover from this dreadful disease.I believe the help is in the home group.By being an active member in my home group I have the opportunity to give back freely what was freely given to me. The Hebrew term for salvation is returning home to one's own kind, that is the feeling that I get when I attend meetings not only in my home group, but wherever I attend a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.Through my home group I have the best of AA TODAY: I am sober. I have a home group. I sponsor members,and best of all I am sponsored. Thanks for a great topic. God Bless


Member: gypsy
Location: valparaiso,in
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 2:55:30 AM

Comments

homegroups... how God works in mysterious ways. i have been away from AA for months. i had a major falling out with my sponsor over some pretty serious stuff about myself she decided to share with another sponsee. this just days before sharing my 4th with her. since then i have drank hit bottom and prayed for the desire for a drink to be removed (as she told me to do) and it was. only of course with time and a major dry drunk i did it again. so i thought maybe if no one could see my face and the anger and resentment that surely wears itself so well on me, just maybe someone would hear me and not judge me. yes, i feel if i go back to my home group, as my whole being longs to do, they will judge me. she is a matriarch around there, or so i feel. i know i am sick and being absolutely selfish and self-righteous, but i cannot just turn off my feelings any more. now, i have moved my residence again. not so far, but far enough to make even trying to connect as fully as i almost had so hard. so many changes... sometimes i wonder if it will ever give. maybe i sound melodramatic but i really feel like i am at the end of my proverbial rope and some kind of miracle has to happen. the worst of it is that its not stopping drinking anymore. i mean, it use to be the biggest issue of it. now its staying stopped and giving myself time to get well. it seems that every time i start feeling recovery take over and selfishness and resentment fading, something happens to kill any happiness i could have. how could she do this to me??? i know its been months, but i have never, ever trusted anyone but her!!! i want my homegroup back, i want to feel like i belong again, i want to walk into a room where people dont think im too strange to associate with, i want someone to listen to me and take me seriously again. not in a clinical way either. i mean i have a counselor and you can only be told so many times why you drink. well no shit. can someone hear me? has anyone ever felt this way? can i ever go home and not feel like an outcast? im so glad that this meeting exists, maybe it is my miracle. please help me...


Member: ChuckM
Location: Alberta
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 2:59:35 AM

Comments

I'm Chuck, an alcoholic

I am grateful and loyal to my home group. It is the only one that I have belonged to. I am now the oldtimer since I followed the advise "Don't drink and don't die".

Our group has fluctuated from 30 to 4 or 5 over the years. It has done things that I did not like and things that I did like. I needed the group when I started and now I try to pass on the program I learned inthe big book.

Early on I got stuck with a chunk of philosophy that has helped with service to my group. The question is not "why me", but "why not me".

This is a small town group and I see the proof that AA will continue. Son's and daughters of my contempories are now in our group.

I go to meetings in other towns, in some cases I have a better attendance record than some of their members. Still there is a special bond with members of my home group.

To the people who go out and try it again page 35 tells us why. Page 45 tells us what is needed and Step 12 tells us how. To them and new comers go to meetings. The people there have been through the wringer and know what you are going through. God bless.

Peace and Serenity


Member: Clint B.
Location: Germany
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 5:06:53 AM

Comments

Hi, I'm Clint and an alcholic. I NEED my home group. It's extremely small, averaging 2 to 6 a meeting. It is composed of about 6 military members and 3 of us civilians. We see the same people every meeting but never the same old stuff some groups seem to experience. Most are in the first year of sobriety and they are a true inspiration. I get so much from the meetings and these people are my true friends. After 26 years of not caring for anybody, with myself at the top of the list, I have learned that I can care and I care deeply for my home group. We have shared so much, joy, sadness, love, understanding and above all that we are not alone.

For those wonderful people who have taken the first step in your sobriety by sharing on this site, welcome (back) to the journey! I would just like to share two things with you: 1. "Nuture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesonme discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the tress & stars; you have a right to be here... (Found in Old Saint Paul's Church, Baltimore; Dated 1692).

2. Go to meetings until you want to.

My prayers are with you and don"t forget that you are loved.


Member: Jan
Location:
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 9:04:28 AM

Comments

Hi everyone. Alcoholic and my name is Jan. Gypsy... It may be time for you to get to know what you do like instead of what you don't. Besides not drinking there is a whole lot of work to do. And now you know what ego in AA can look like (matriarch now you know what you do not want to be like. Go out and find a other meeting where there is not that kind of company. It is just your turn to learn about the many variations of the disease.


Member: Catherine B.
Location: BOSTON MA
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 2:56:16 PM

Comments

Hi all , Catherine B. an alcoholic, here in boston MA , Is hard to join a home group, you have to have time in sobriety, if you are newly sober you cannot be accepted it is so discouraging.


Member: DOUG B.
Location: WEST COAST
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 5:40:27 PM

Comments

DOUG B. HERE PLEASE ANSWER ME AT COFFEE POT PAGE THANKS

DOUG B. -------HELP-----------------

-------ME-----------------


Member: Janet
Location: USA
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 5:42:25 PM

Comments

Hi all, Janet here alcoholic, I would be lost without my home group. They made me feel welcome and loved when I didn't know which way was up. I spent a year and a half in and out until I wanted to be sober more than I wanted to be drunk. I was never made to feel unwelcome. I was always welcome. I did need other meetings. I think that we need to do the 90 meetings in the 90 days. I now try to welcome new comers the same way. I also never judge because I am one drink away from being back there. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Shirley W.
Location: Texas
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 7:15:43 PM

Comments

I'm Shirley and I am an Alcoholic. I agree with anon. Some home groups can become dysfunctional, like families. I have a relatively small home group where I have been an active member ( 3 times weekly ) for over a year. Just lately, I have been feeling less enthusiastic about attending this group. The answer for me was to go to different groups around town for at least one of my weekly meetings. It makes things "fresher" when I go back. I have been involved in AA for 10+ years. I was sober for 7and 1/2 years, then after the birth of my baby, I developed a major mood disorder. After 7 mos. of trying to deal with it without drugs, I had to give in. I know acceptance is the key to all my problems today. I pray for God's help in accepting this part of my life. I have tried to taper off the meds, but each time the symptoms return. The drinking is also dogging me. As we all know, an Alcoholic cannot fight Alcohol. Please God grant me humility for today. Thank you for my beautiful daughter and my loving husband and thank you for the medical help I have received. Help me to accept it with grace and dignity. Amen


Member: Duane M.
Location: Central,N.Y.
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 8:53:49 PM

Comments

Good evening family, My name is Duane and I am a real alcoholic.My home group is what helped me through all my pain and hurt.When I went out after nearly 5 years of sobriety the only onesI could let know was my family members at my home.They know me and they really share their E,S&H.If I cannot share my stuff there where can I. I was only about two month's in the program when I chose this group to be part of my life.The key is to be active in the group's business meetings and do what you can.Greet people at the door,empty ashtrays,push in chairs after the meeting,etc.....GET INVOLVED!!! Don't drink and go to meetings so maybe you can help save someone elses life from this malody of alcoholism. Stick around till the miracle happens. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Lu
Location: Houston TX
Date: 6/6/00
Time: 10:19:03 PM

Comments

I'm an alcoholic & my name's Lu. Sobriety date, by the Grace of God, 10/17/89. This is my first time in a cyber-meeting; thanks to all who share! I needed to be reminded today that my sobriety is contingent upon my spiritual condition - not my all too faulty mind and non-existent willpower. When I sobered up, I was in pain and mad as hell! I wanted to know how it works, and right now thank you very much. Finally I had to suspend disbelief and just trust those around me, listening while trying desperately to understand and often being confused. I also had to suspend my pride, ego, will and superior intelligence. My home group wanted to be friends and I just wanted to stay sober. One of the group told me I could be a part of the group or separate from it, my choice. I had to fire my first sponsor who then sold me down the river. I got another sponsor and still hold up my head when I see her over 10 years later. I didn't like the way things were done but the group flourished in spite of that. People can be aggravating, but they stay sober even while irritating me. Sometime after five years I learned what patience, tolerance and acceptance really were. I discovered a new "feeling" - contentment - and me over 40, who wudda thought. Those homies save me, even the ones I'd like to have throttled. I found out if you don't drink, you don't get drunk. Don't drink today; put the desire chip in your teeth and gnaw til the craving passes. Benefits of a home group? They etched all these words in my brain. God sends them to those who suffer - surrender, admit defeat and let us love you sober.


Member: Steve L
Location: Indiana, US
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 12:06:12 AM

Comments

Hello, Steve, recovering alky. Home group is where I get to know people better and be active. Have done service work such as GSR, Intergroup rep, and chaired meetings. Recently moved, so I got new home group and sponsor. Attend home group meetings more than any other. Still emailing old sponsor and friends from prior home group. They know me better than anyone and am getting to know people in new group. It works.


Member: CorinneM.
Location: Whiterock B.C.
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 2:24:35 AM

Comments

Serene Corine here alky/addict I am. Catherine B.-- You can join any group anytime. It can be your first meeting if that's what you want.

I love my homegroup, I love being secratary there. It keeps me tied in.

Another 24 to you all. Serene Corinne


Member: Lisa P
Location: Perth Western Australia
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 8:19:42 AM

Comments

Hi Im Lisa and Im an alcoholic

Reading all these wonderful messages has reminded me that I must find myself a homegroup again. Unfortunately I am unable to attend my former homegroup as it is a night meeting (I have young children) and am really missing the closeness of the support a homegroup provides.

I hope you all find peace in your lives one day at a time, or sometimes one minute at a time.


Member: Jan S
Location: Australia
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 10:58:34 AM

Comments

Jan S, Alcoholic. Lisa P, you put your finger on it for me, as in "one minute at a time". How do you come up with a homegroup? First one you go to, or just in the area you live? Does anybody get recommended to a certain group? Best wishes for all.


Member: Constance T.
Location: GERMANY
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 3:04:23 PM

Comments

I am living in germany, use to live in the states where their were so many meetings i could afford to choose, now meetings are a distance,so i dont attend often, i dont have a homegroup,sponsor or the support of people who dont drink, so i must call longdistance do a lot of emailing,insant messaging . i will not take my home group for granted when i leave here.even the people i couldnt stand i love now, and wish i could sit down an kick it with them,over here they are to cold, anyway it is never them it is always me,i need help.anybody got any suggestions?constance


Member: Tricia W.
Location: Pennsylvania
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 5:17:29 PM

Comments

Hello. My name is Tricia and I'm an alcoholic. I didn't read any of the other posts, just decided to share from what I read from the first share. Home groups are an extremely important part of our recovery. At least that is the way it is for me. If anyone doesn't have a home group, now is the time, don't delay. My home group is phenomenal, they know me. They know when I am having a good day, bad day. etc....they can also call me on my shit. I think that my home group is a very vital part of my recovery. I don't think people focus on getting a home group as much as they should. I am sure there are plenty of meetings out there that can use the support. I feel I have a very special home group, that something special happens in that room. I can't explain it, but, I love the feeling. When I walk in the room, I feel so at home. I have traveled to several meetings all over the place, and there is no special place like my home group. That's all I have, thanks for letting me share. DON'T DELAY ANYONE WHO DOESN'T HAVE A HOME GROUP GET ONE TODAY!!!!!!!! (tricia@losch.net)


Member: suzip.
Location: south jersey
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 10:53:41 PM

Comments

Home groups are an important part of everyone's recovery. If you have a good foundation at your home group the people there can be your biggest support system. They can tell by the look on your face if you are ok or not.I think getting a home group and getting involved in it helps to establish a good foundation in recovery. I haven't been to my home group for awhile. I think I outgrew it. I thought that it had changed but in retrospect I realize that it's me that has changed. Which does happen to us if we stick around long enough. My sponsor told me at the very beginning that things around me might never change and get better, but I would. And I have.I guess I know that I have to find a new home group. I've been feeling kind of lost and I know that it's me. I have to get back to basics. I'm not new here you know I'll have 9 yrs on the 4th of July. It seems to me that the longer I'm around I keep finding that there is so little that I know!!There is no curriculum for picking out a home group I picked mine initially because after trying a zillion different groups that I felt at home there and also I liked all the "old" sobriety there. There were a lot of people with a lot of time there and I thought that I would benefit from their wisdom. Sorry to have rambled on. Here's to another 24.


Member: sunny s
Location: New Bedford, Mass
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 11:12:51 PM

Comments

I try to remember that this site IS the home group for some people. Many do not have the luxury of all the U.S. meetings and the extended face to face AA community. I join every group I attend regularly. I am a member here at Staying Cyber. I can see that there are other members who do service for this group. I get a tiny resentment when someone says "a real meeting". A real meeting is 2 alkies and a Big book. Long has it been recognized in AA that the meeting may even take place by snail mail! This months AA Grapevine has an article by an oldtimer with 33 years who started doing 12 step work when there were no detoxes. In those days, you weren't an initiated 12 stepper until someone puked in your car. Now unable to get out as much, he 12 steps and sponsors on-line. Tell him he can't run a real meeting on-line!

When people treat this site as if it isn't a "real meeting", they are the ones who are losing an opportunity to carry the message to other suffering and lonely alcoholics.

I'm going to introduce myself as a member of this group from now on. I encourage people who need this as a home group to do the same thing. It's like a meeting with a lot of tourists. Well, actually the tourists need to be reminded that this site is the home group for for some folks. It's rude to say this meeting isn't as good as the meeting at XYZ. Contributing your best AA anyway.

I've been blessed with the opportunity to go to many face to face meetings. I try to contribute equally to all of them. It is just as lovely to come on line and see the names of some of the regulars here as it is to see the faces of some of the regulars at other meetings. I want to take part in being responsible for extending the hand of AA any way possible. I think HP is on-line listening just like he gets in those envelopes that some people have to use to conduct a meeting.


Member: sunny s
Location: new Bedford, Mass
Date: 6/7/00
Time: 11:15:51 PM

Comments

(((Constance T. in Germany))) How about it? You want to join?


Member: Bill
Location:
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 11:47:35 AM

Comments

Isn't it possible to get help to drink moderately instead of abstinance. "The way I see it" is that people drink obssessivly because of problems. I don't see over indulgence as a disease. It is self-medication for the chronic problems in people's lives. I think that most people that are "alcoholics" would probably be able to drink normaly if they were able to resolve their problems. In my AA experience most AAers haven't resolved their problems. They just continue to set around complain about them. If they ever really came to grips with their problems they could probably be responsible drinkers. And, yes I have been called alcohol "dependant". And I am sure the first thing that runs through your minds is "He is in denial". More of your brainwashing. Notice I took ownership for all of MY statements. And that's "how this Bill sees it."


Member: Von
Location: DBC
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 12:04:33 PM

Comments

Great topic. Thanks for bringing it.

I have had the same home group since I first came in the rooms. Even though I have grown and changed, I just love that home group. I have several other meetings that are regulars for me, but there's just something about my home group. I know it's not clickish anymore, as a place for me to feel accepted and understood. I feel that way at almost every meeting because today I know that I'm just a different pea in the same pod. I just feel that is where my "home base" is. I have had people ask me when I'm going to change my home group because we have a nice mix of newbies and oldies, lots of papers (get well cards as we like to call them); I don't want to change because if I believe that the most important person is the newcomer, then I must stay and help out. It's amazing how a brand new person can help me tremendously. Either as a reminder to me of where I can be, or a reminder to me to stay on the beam.

A very wise person did remind me the "we are in the fellowship, but never forget that we must work the program." Fellowship alone will not keep me sober, not without a program.

Another smart person also said, "if you don't have a home group, then you're just passing through!"

Thanks God for the people of AA. Thank God for this life saving program!


Member: suzy g
Location: sunny so cal
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 12:57:16 PM

Comments

This topic is very timely for me. I had been ill, and not able to go to a meeting for awhile. I had to force myself to go back to meetings. I just didn't feel comfortable sharing in that group. I started using this and one other site to get back in touch with the program. It reminded me that, living in so. cal. where it is fairly overflowing with alcoholics, i have no excuse for finding another group. Just this week i tried another meeting that i really liked. I've found my new home group. This site, for me, is a supplement - not a replacement, for face-to-face meetings. It's something i can do everyday. That keeps me honest. Bill, in every meeting they read part of the big book that says something like if anyone can learn to drink like a gentleman, our hat's are off to him. If you can moderately, more power to you. I can't. That's MY decision. Everyone has to find their own way, good luck to you on yours.


Member: Carlos G
Location: LA
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 2:32:34 PM

Comments

I got some great anal sex last nite! I really got off man! All rite this lady was screamin.

A thing like that really keeps me sober man. I dontīneed to think of no drinking shit when I see the naked buttocks. I picked up that chick in another AA group. There was lots of cum.


Member: 13th steper
Location: with a newcomer
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 4:41:30 PM

Comments

keep cuming back carlos g.


Member: Kelly E
Location: Canada
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 6:39:43 PM

Comments

Hi, my names Kelly and I'm an alcoholic... I have been sober for 3 days now, have decided to stop trying to manage my drinking...and just know I can't drink at all... After reading all these comments today on having a homegroup, i've decided to get out there and get one for myself! I finally feel free! Hope I can do it this time!!One day at a time...


Member: JR R.
Location: NYC
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 9:23:40 PM

Comments

HI Friends, I'm JR and I'm an abstinent alcoholic and drug addict, thanks to AA. Home group is so important to me, because it functioned as a more functional family than my own, and definiately took the place of those maniac alkies and dope fiends who were my family when active. I've moved to a different part of my city (NY), and easing into a new home group has not been too hard, since I go to see my old crew a lot. It seems that AA's are pretty kind to each other, generally. I've met a couple of really wack-o types at meetings too, thru the years, but some are just sicker than others..And there are a lot of really upbeat, together people, who were once really messed up.


Member: Rebecca C
Location: Kentucky
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 10:57:00 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Rebecca and a very grateful recovering alcoholic. I got sober in Mississippi and my first home group was part of my salvation. I began learning the AA program there and had such tremendous support. I was gradually able to take what I was learning there to the outside world and inside my home. Patience and tolerance were a couple of the important "lessons" I began learning along with staying sober one day at a time. This group of recovering alcoholics helped keep me grounded in the program and get me involved in service work. It was the first time in a long time people were willing to trust me to follow through with anything. I began with making the coffee and in time became the GSR. It was through that group that I was able to get a better understanding of the "Big AA Picture" outside of that group and others I attended. That AA group was one of the many miracles God had in store for me when I was willing to try to stay away from one drink for one day and keep coming back. I am so very grateful for them. I now live in Kentucky and have another home group which is very small but very important to my continued recovery. I don't want to try and stay sober without them because they help to keep me on track with my character defects and daily living problems. It's also the best place to celebrate my joy in soboriety. This is my first time at this site and I really appreciate the sharing and caring.


Member: Roy S
Location:
Date: 6/8/00
Time: 11:06:43 PM

Comments

I have definitely gained a lot from my home group, as it seems others have as well. While I do like meetings of this format as well, it is nice to go to a live meeting and get some face-to-face contact as well. It is nice to walk in and see some familiar faces and know that there are people who will give me the support that I need. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: SHELLIM
Location: NEW YORK
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 12:03:59 PM

Comments

HI THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT TO ADMIT THAT I HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM, I HAVE ADMITTED TO MYSELF ONLY NOT TO ANYONE ELSE. MY SISTER JUST JOINED AA A MONTH AGO BECAUSE SHE ENDED UP IN THE HOSPITAL INCOHERENT. I HAVE 2 SMALL KIDS AND I TRY NOT TO DRINK IN FRONT OF THEM BUT IF I GET STARTED, IT IS HARD TO STOP, I THINK I AM OK BUT CLEARLY I AM NOT. I CAN GO OUT SOMETIMES AND HAVE A FEW BUT THEN OTHER TIMES I DO NOT KNOW WHEN TO STOP NOR CAN I, I GUESS. I DO NEED SOME GUIDANCE I HAVE COPIED THE STEPS AND INFO FROM THE BIG BOOK. MY FATHER WAS AN ALCOHOLIC AS SOME OF MY UNCLES WERE SO IT IS A FAMILY THING AND I DO NOT WANT MY KIDS DOING THIS LATER ON IN LIFE. THANKS FOR LISTENING I WILL BE BACK AS I CONTINUE ON THIS ROAD TO RECOVERY


Member: Donna M.
Location: Muskogee
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 3:33:53 PM

Comments

Hi I'm Donna a grateful recovering alcoholic. To Constance, been there in (Germany) done that. I would be happy to talk with you via e-mail donnmlm@netscape.net As for my home group I would be lost. When I got sober in 89 I had a very strong home group and now I make it what I need it to be. Keep our hand out and good shall return. Thx Donna M.


Member: Pam C.
Location: Arizona
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 4:11:01 PM

Comments

My name is Pam and I am an alcoholic. This is for Delia and Carla. Picking up the 1,000 lb. telephone takes courage, more than we will ever know. But, if you do call A.A. they will tell you where you can attend a meeting and at the meeting you are not required to do anything. You don't even have to tell them your name. You don't have to talk. You can sit in the back of the room in your dark glasses and listen. I know, that's what I did for a long time, but you know what, I started to get a tiny piece of hope that all those people were just like me and they didn't require anything of me. If, in my heart, I wanted to get off the booze, that's a beginning. I wasn't sure I was an alcoholic until after I attended a few meetings.

An old grey haired woman came up to the coffee pot where I was hanging out (A.A. makes great coffee by the way) and said, "Honey, if you don't like this meeting, try at least six different ones until you feel like you fit." Once you do, you may decide to make it your home group, but keep it simple for now. That worked. So, you see, all it takes is one phone call. If that doesn't work, you can get down on your knees and pray to whatever God you believe or don't believe in and ask for the willingness to reach out for help. That worked for me too. You can do it! We believe you can.


Member: Ken C
Location: Winnipeg, (Friendly Manitoba) Canada
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 6:04:11 PM

Comments

IMPORTANT NOTICE!!

On Monday the 12th there will be a TV program shown called Inside Alcoholics Anonymous. It will be shown on the A&E channel under the name of Investigative Reports. The time (at least here in Manitoba, Canada) is 9pm Central time.

The chairman of G.S.O. will be on the show as well as a number of old timers. One thing it will do is dispell some of the hype about A.A. that is not true.

Sorry for not sticking to the topic of this page, but as an alkie, you know I wouldn't find it hard to rationalize this - right? I suggest you tape the program if possible - perhaps for the benfit of those who might miss it.

Love to all - Ken


Member: JUAN
Location: LA
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 6:51:18 PM

Comments

CARLOS G. IN LA HOW COME YOU TOLD EVERYONE IT WAS A WOMAN YOU WERE WITH???????YOU KNOW IT WAS ME JUAN.AND YOU WERE ON THE RECEIVING END,WHEN I PUT MY 13+ IN YOUR CHUBBY FAT ASS!!!!!HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR BUTT BUDDIE, JUAN


Member: Billy D
Location: Angus, Scotland
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 7:10:16 PM

Comments

Hi, my name is Billy and I am an alcoholic, staying sober by applying the principles of the AA programme of recovery on a daily basis. Although sober now for about eighteen years I still remember the feelings of strength and security my first home group gave me. At a time when I did not like myself, this group of relative strangers showed me patience and love. When I took a drink, as I did on a number of occasions, they did not upbraid me but rather gave me the strength, courage and support to start again. Joining a group though, is not only about what it and the other members can give you; it is also about what you can, eventually, give to others. In that sense it is the beginning of the road back to self-respect. It does not matter if it is making the tea, putting the seats away, or being group secretary, for many people the contribution they make at group level can be the first tangible signs of recovery. We have a saying in Scotland: don't lie on the edge of the bed, get in the middle where you cannot fall out. In our membership is our strength and in our programme is our recovery. Thank you for letting me share at this meeting.


Member: Deborah M.
Location: Alabama
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 7:58:31 PM

Comments

Hello, my name is Deborah and I am an alcoholic.I am new at this so bare with me. I have been sober 5 years by the grace of God. one day at a time.I quit going to my home group about 6 weeks ago.It seeem to me that there was a lot ofpersonalities before principles and i WAS LEAVING THERE feeling worse than what I did before I went. About 2 weeks ago I did go one time.I care about the people, but I am not sure they care about me. Let me put it this way if they do care they have a frightening way of showing it. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: milo m
Location: northern n.y.
Date: 6/9/00
Time: 9:01:29 PM

Comments

to any one having a problem with alcohol, the people who helped me told me to go to meetings don't drink & get a sponser


Member: Kathy T.
Location:
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 12:32:41 AM

Comments

A little over 10 years ago I went to a meeting that people said I would't like because all the members are "by the book" traditionalists. I joined the group and have never been sorry. My group is where I learned about the Steps of this program. It's also where I began to walk through the 12 steps, and where I learned about spirituality. I may be a Big Book thumper, but its the only thing that worked for this Alcoholic. "Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity." BB Page 68. Have a blessed week.


Member: Door
Location: Illinois
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 6:06:36 AM

Comments

Hi Door from Illinois. Home group. What a greaft topic. With 22 years of sobriety I have learned that in my home group I cannot "hustle a hustler." I am another one who frequently needed (and still sometimes do) a gentle nudge from someones boot that knows me. There are still times when I do not see what the problem is because I am so wrapped up in it. There is a lot of sobriety i my home group and I hear what I need to hear, not what I want to hear. The loving, caring people there are quick to point me in the right direction when I tend to wander because they know me so well. They see the problem long before I do and set up the caution sign. I believe first thing that impressed me was their commitment to showing up at the meetings each week. If they take it that serious, so must I. learn by their example. Sobriety is a joy, but drinking is not. To Delia and Carla, come back with your ears and eyes wide open. Perhaps for a little while, you might want to listen more than talk. That's fine. After all, I reached a point after three years of sobriety when I was tired of the slogans, and thought I knew everything I needed. Seven years later, half dead I returned because there was no where else to go. I couldn't live and I couldn't die. Now, 22 years down the road I realize each day how little I know and how much I need the love and wisdom of the home group and my sponsors. Thanks and God hold you in the palm of his hand and give you peace. We will love you until you can again love yourself..


Member: Rose C.
Location: Waterville, maine
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 9:20:15 AM

Comments

My name is Rose C. and I am an Alcoholic. This morning is 9 years of sobriety for me and I am waiting to go celebrate my anniversary with my home group which is in Waterville, Maine and meets at St> Marks on Eustis Parkway at 10 A.M. and is called the "Open Hands Group" and it is the best group. Well this morning I am exceptional nervous because of my celebration and my EGO and the Committe is having a field day in my head. Is there anyone that would share there experience, strenght and hope with me this morning so I can get out of myself thank you. Rose C.


Member: Ira R
Location: Phoenix
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 11:14:57 AM

Comments

Good for your Rose. Just think how lucky you are to have this concern. If 9-years was only 9-days, your problems and concerns would be different. You can thank God and AA that you are dealing with that.


Member: Anonymous
Location:
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 1:03:31 PM

Comments

Home group, is still a phrase way out there against me. I know of one, where I attend meetings. What would I say of it, how it differs from a standard meeting: it's more of a tea party than a meeting. It's lost gravity and given itself to popularity and a false sense of unity. If one of the members saw you down for the count and in the gutter, they would not lift a hand to help you unless it was to take you to an AA meeting, and in that they would boast themselves as if they fulfilled their duty before God. Perhaps their idea of home is different from mine, but as it is, their friendship and help does not extend beyond pointing to soberiety, they may give you a big book but as for the band aid, food and clothing, and a few bucks in your pocket, "that will be the day they die". It's been said, that the crowd is untruth and anywhere there is one it is so. The individual before God, that is truth; the untruth of the home groups surpasses that of the regular meetings. To wit, they clap for each other in these home groups. It's unseemly to clap in an ordinary AA meeting, and in this it's most plain what I'm trying to say; the sense of urgency the program requires is all but missing. For those who want instead here an incourageing word: I'm still suffering!


Member: Mark
Location: Brighton, England
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 4:31:27 PM

Comments

Hi,I'm Mark and I'm an alcoholic. I am so grateful to AA because it has given me back my life when I could see no hope. Carla, please get to a meeting, I know it is difficult after you have had a relapse but you have to remember that you are there for yourself. Any fears that you may have about what others in the fellowship may think, real or imagined, are really irrelevant. My home group is very important to me. I live in a small town near Brighton, England and it is here that I have got sober. By the Grace of God I am now two months sober. Of course home groups can get into "family" type arguments and tensions but at the end of the day we know we are all there to stay sober and work the AA program and without each other we would be lost. Keep coming back!


Member: Connie P
Location: Minnesota
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 9:26:37 PM

Comments

Hello all, I was just surfing the net for some really helpful info on staying sober and happened on to your site. I don't have a "home group" at this time and that is possibly why after 3 years of recovery I relapsed. I miss my home group but was unable to continue with it because I took a day job. I am only 24 hours sober at this time and really scared, although I know in my head that I can do it, I have done it before. I miss my recovery and am very fortunate that I do have caring people around me to help me out in this. Hang on tight to the people who have become important to you in your recovery and hopefully I will be down the road soon!!!! It works and will again for me!


Member: Beth L.
Location: Va.
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 9:53:21 PM

Comments

Hello, Can anyone help me find any groups that meet in Vienna, Va.? Because of moving, I have lapsed and very much so need to get into another group. Thanks


Member: LynnZ
Location: Palm Beach, FL
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 10:07:36 PM

Comments

Home groups is a great topic. Where else can we begin the process of actually having friends, faliliar smiling faces, and feel so at home. I believe there is no such thing as a bad meeting. Luckily my home group is Central House in Delray Beach just celebrating their 34th anniversary and offers meetings all day, every day. My sponsor suggested I do 2 meetings a day and now I find I'm enjoying all the blessings of even 3 a day. I am now venturing out to meetings at other locations and I seem to always feel welcome with smiling familiar faces! I'm grateful for the fellowship, friendship & blessings bestowed on me in such a short time. Feeling good and I think I'll "keep coming back"!


Member: LynnZ
Location: Palm Beach, FL
Date: 6/10/00
Time: 10:30:10 PM

Comments

Hi I'm LynnZ and I am an alcoholic. I apologize for not properly identifying myself and for the typos! Correction: Central House celebrated their 35th anniversary. This is my first internet meeting and I guess I got so excited as I typed. FOR CARLA: The first step in getting your life back is what you're doing-getting sober. Get a sponsor to work the steps with you, go to as many meetings as you can and I too lost it all. In time, you will see this way of life will bring you more than you ever dreamed of! Don't drink, go to meetings! Keep in touch with your new friends that you have just met! WE LOVE YOU!


Member: Dennis McG
Location: Tacoma, WA
Date: 6/11/00
Time: 12:46:01 AM

Comments

Hi, everyone. My name is Dennis, and I'm an alcoholic.

Browsed as far as Bill's remarks concerning overindulgence in alcohol and unresolved problems in the life of an "alcoholic." If that was so, it's hard to explain experiences like those of the author of "A Different Slant" in the 1st edition, among many others. The fact that many of us are at risk of drinking again when life is good also seems to defy such an explanation.

The people in my homegroup have given me more gifts than I could ever repay. They've shared their stories, their problems and the solutions they've found. They've given me hope when I've seen them walk through life's certain trials and low spots with the help of God, the steps and other alcoholics. They've given me many opportunities to be of service, from making coffee and setting up chairs to Corrections Committee representative and assistant treasurer. We spend a great deal of time together aside from our weekly meeting, on camping trips, bowling nights, at frequent yard parties held at one member's house, playing poker, watching rented videos, and much more. These friends and the relationships we have are like nothing I've experienced before in my 40 years of life!

It's delightful to welcome new people to our group and freely offer all that we have to share with them, just as my home group "family" shares them with me!

"May the sunlight of the Spirit shine upon you, and the good Lord bless you and keep you until we meet again!"


Member: John.L
Location: Newark.De
Date: 6/11/00
Time: 7:38:19 AM

Comments

Morning All ,,,,,,my names John Alkie /Addict I have been having alot of roller coaster situation's lately,,,,not sure if it's the season's changing,,,weather getting warmer,,,or that I have a anniversary coming up.....but what ever the case,even with everything that has been going on. I have not found it necessary to take a drink. which is a Joy to me,,,in 2 weeks i'm off to the International Convention in Minneapolis,,,which would have never been possible ,had I been drinking...so I guest the topic i'd like to discuss,,is living a sober life,and the joy's /cause I don't know about anyone else.but I didn't get sober to be miserable.... :>) John.L