Member: Rarely
Location: rontherocket@hotmail.com
Remote Name: 142.161.176.174
Date: 04 Apr 2004
Time: 05:08 PM -0400

Comments

" The joy of living." Tomorrow I have 31 years sober, Most of it has been a joy. I would like to hear about your joy as a result of staying sober. Love and Hugs Rarely


Member: nancy b.
Location: akron
Remote Name: 205.188.117.14
Date: 04 Apr 2004
Time: 07:40 PM -0400

Comments

Congratulations on your 31-year journey. I'm new to staying cyber. At yesterday's meeting, one of the things I shared was it IS possible to be happy in sobriety (sometimes not JOYOUS), but there were certainly lots of times when drinking that I wasn't joyous either!!! And certainly not the next morning with major hangover. I'll come back to this meeting, but right now have to go to "Coffee Pot" as I am awaiting the answer to a question I asked. Again, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"


Member: nancy b.
Location: akron
Remote Name: 205.188.117.14
Date: 04 Apr 2004
Time: 07:56 PM -0400

Comments

SECOND ATTEMPT TO SHARE Congratulations on a 31-year wonderful journey. At my women's meeting yesterday,it was good to be able to tell a couple of newcomers that they will eventually have happy/fun times as sober women. Being happy without drinking was an early concern of mine. Today, I'm not always happy, but then neither are others without this disease. (JOYOUS doesn't happeb a lot, but I have to be careful to NOT get too high on life for fear I'll drink to maintain that high.) Writing two gratitudes down each day helps on my journey. AGAIN, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"


Member: Kathleen
Location: Florida
Remote Name: 165.247.77.15
Date: 04 Apr 2004
Time: 10:41 PM -0400

Comments

Congrats on 31 years rarely. Terrific. Wow the joys of sobriety are so many. All the promises have come true for me. I think the first joy was getting past the self loathing and self hatred I had when I first showed up here. I was like a new kid on a candy block once I got sober and started living the steps. Been back to school a few times before I finally decided what I wanted to be when I grew up. Dreams have come true. Went from skid row to a comfortable home and a profession that is very rewarding. Easy? no..there have been many rough spots. And it's a daily program. If I don't stay on top of what I need to do, then that serenity and peace of mind and Joy.....takes a back seat. I have learned today though that there is nothing that happens in sobriety that I can't handle sober. And if I just do "the next right thing"....the other side of difficulties is a very nice place to be. THanks for the topic and for being here.. Kathleen, alcoholic in Florida


Member: Donnie M
Location: Short Gap, WV
Remote Name: 68.187.51.61
Date: 04 Apr 2004
Time: 11:25 PM -0400

Comments

Hi to all and what a great topic. I have been living this way of life now for a few twenty fours now and I am here to tell you life can not get any better. I have a solid career, a loving family, friend`s, and most of all I have an understanding with my higher power. I have accredited all the success in my life to the fellowship. I have struggled with the everyday things people have to deal with, but I have not found a reason to pick up the first drink. The slogan, "Happy, Joyous, and Free" has all came true in my life and I hope to never return to the depths of what I call Hell I had went through to get here and that being sober and loving life. I will end on this if you truly want to stay sober don`t drink and go to meetings and for God sake learn to take suggestions and to have an open mind with your soberity. God bless all and CONGRATS TO YOU RARELY ON THE 31YRS MAY YOU HAVE MANY MORE.


Member: Elaine S.
Location: Grand Rapids, MI
Remote Name: 4.159.113.97
Date: 04 Apr 2004
Time: 11:42 PM -0400

Comments

My name is Elaine and I am an alcoholic. I congratulate you on your birthday. I just wanted to say that although I am not joyous at this moment in time I have had moments of joy in sobriety--and they are wonderful.


Member: Jenn A.
Location: Oak Harbor, Wa
Remote Name: 4.41.15.233
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 02:27 AM -0400

Comments

Congradulations on 31 years. I have lots of joys of being sober, for one NO MORE HANGOVERS. All of my bills are getting paid so creditors are not calling me. I'm advancing at work and my family is very proud. I dont have people expalaing embarassing things that I did the night before I dont have to call paople to say sorry for what I did last night. I also have a little bit of extra spending money to get myself nice things. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Charlie Darling
Location: Key West FL
Remote Name: 68.154.115.43
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 07:07 AM -0400

Comments

Hi Family Charlie Darling a very grateful recovering Alcholic. Happy Birthday Rarly. WOW 31 yrs, and life still gets better. OH the joys of being sober, always seems to amaze me, for it seems there is always something new cropping up, and today I can handle anything as long as I don't pick up. I have had many joys in sobriety, and sometimes I ask myself what I have done to get these, and when I was drinking whatever I got I deserved, and got them because I treated people differently. Today I treat people as I want to be treated, and it is so good. I'll continue to keep coming, until I am on my way to the big AA in the heavens. GOD BLESS ALL Peace and Love, Charlie kwduke_1999@yahoo.com


Member: Vernon P
Location: Illinois
Remote Name: 64.12.117.14
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 07:26 AM -0400

Comments

Thanks Rarely for your suggested topic. And congratulations on 31 years. Since every single day is a miracle for us, that is tremendous. As to joy, I am becoming aware that it is not dependent on how I feel. Often I do feel the joy, but more often I don't. However, I am mentally aware of where I could be--of where alcohol and personal unmanageability could have taken me. And I know that my life today is full and rich. This gives me joy. Today I am in the middle of a lawsuit on behalf of another, I am well in debt, my wife and I are smothered by the care of both our mothers who live with us, and not everything goes my way all day everyday. But I'm not locked up, I eat square meals, I have a good job, and I feel relatively sane. So it could be so much worse that I am able--by comparison--to have abundant joy. And it is because, one day at a time, I don't drink. God bless you all.


Member: Craig L (Dogmanor@yahoo.com)
Location: Aloha, Oregon
Remote Name: 216.148.246.134
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 09:38 AM -0400

Comments

Craig L here another “real alcoholic” (page 21). This weekend I had some difficulties with my significant other. When I am in emotional pain and fear time seems to stand still. My alcoholism wants me to run and get loaded. This morning I wanted to stay in bed and nurture my depression. In the past I would have taken the day off with a bottle or three and gone on a bender. Today, thanks to you and the steps, I choose to put one foot in front of the other, do the next right thing and go to my job. When I was drinking there was no hope for Joy, today there is certainty and faith in a return to Joy.


Member: Penny
Location: KeyWest, Fl
Remote Name: 205.188.116.199
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 10:29 AM -0400

Comments

Hi, Penny here, an Alcoholic. It took me a long time to get into the program. I played with my disease forever. Always I was looking for the serenity and peace but looking in the wrong places. When I can into the program the hole in my stomach was filled with hope, happiness and freedom like I have never felt before and I am 75 years old. it's never too late to join the fellowship. God bless you all for being there for me.


Member: Lisa H
Location: TX
Remote Name: 66.76.69.33
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 11:05 AM -0400

Comments

Hello, I'm Lisa an alcoholic... Congrats to Rarely on 31 years, thats a miracle, and to Penny for sharing that it's never too late. I am so grateful to be sober today. I just celebrated 9 years and I've enjoyed most of it... The big book says on pg. 132 that we aren't a glum lot, we absolutely insist on enjoying life. I was afraid that my "fun" would be over when I first got sober because from time to time I would still have fun drinking, I thought it will be so boring and empty without booze. I have a friend that says: He didn't get tired of drinking, he got tired of going to jail. I could relate, I got tired of the consequences. Life is NO way boring today, I can barely keep up. My perception of FUN has changed, my life is so full and I love it. The program has taught me how to match calamity with serenity. My husband came home an hour ago and said that he quit his job and now he's out looking for another...but I know that it'll all be OK. God takes care of me, and He does a good job. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: joe W
Location: Lufkin, TX
Remote Name: 66.76.20.235
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 12:58 PM -0400

Comments

As your name implies, Rarely, have we seen a person fail whole follows the steps. Happy Birthday and I know the feeling. I also know the reality of life and that all is not fun and games. The program gives us a road map to life. There are no muddy roads if we follow the path of those that have gone before us. I have traveled the road for over 35 years and there is a lot of fun. Happiness is a state of mind. the program returned my mind to a sound and sober state and I do not wish today to return to the state of despair. May you have many more fruitful, happy and sober years that you will never have to apologize for.


Member: Dolly M.
Location: Homosassa, FL
Remote Name: 65.34.7.157
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 02:11 PM -0400

Comments

Hi everyone, Tom M recovering alcoholic. I too am happy to be joyous. It will be 12 years May 25th 2004. I have to addmit the first few years were rough, but as time past and I kept working my program, and took the advice of a good sponsor; kept going to meetings things began to improve. As long as I remembered to take it one day at a time. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: AZbill
Location: azbill1172@cox.net
Remote Name: 68.231.160.24
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 03:40 PM -0400

Comments

Hi Bill here, alcoholic from Arizona. Congrats Rocketing Ron. Good to see you back and posting. What a joy life is today. When I sat down my last drink I was living alone in an old "refurbished" chicken coop on a dirt alley long side the railroad tracks. Today I am no longer alone unless I want to be. I am free. I have the free will to choose to drink or not to drink. Awesome freedom. I trashed a family in 1972. Next month I will visit my former wife, my hubby-in-law and my six girls. I am welcome in their homes. What a joy that is. I do it every year. What a joy it was to drive four hours one way just for breakfast and conversation eh Ron?. When I was drinking I would not walk across the street to visit unless you had booze and some money to "lend" me. That is just the spiritual joys. I won't even get into the material gifts I earned.. merely by stopping drinking and starting a new way of thinking and a new way of life. Thanks Ron and I hope it is warming up some for ya. I love you all.Thanks for being a part of my sobriety today, Bill


Member: gerald b
Location: lennox ca
Remote Name: 69.104.175.181
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 04:26 PM -0400

Comments

Rarely I have been sober in AA for over 22 years, and like you most of it has been very joyful. When things are not going to suit me I know there is a reason for it, and my higher power takes care of it. Maybe not as soon as I would like, but it is usually for the better. Wishing you a very happy birth day Love gerald gerald b lennox ca.


Member: CODY D
Location: Enumclaw, WA
Remote Name: 63.228.105.95
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 04:45 PM -0400

Comments

Hi, my name is Cody, and I am an alcoholic. Happy birthday to Rarely. I struggled with depression when I was drinking, and continue to struggle with it today. The difference is that today I have people to help me through those rough times, and I don't have to wallow in my self-pity like I used to. I don't try to block all joy from my life like I did in my drinking days. I get a great amount of joy and gratitude just from doing activites that in the past would have been a drunken mess, with a clear head. My higher power has given me the gift of sobriety and when I get down, just comparing the past to today, is enough to bring joy to my heart.


Member: AndyD
Location: Detroit
Remote Name: 68.41.155.151
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 05:05 PM -0400

Comments

Congrats on 31 years sober. Hopefully I'm on my way there, though it seems like a long hard road from way back here in year one. The joy of living for someone like me comes in many ways. I discover things that I glossed over when I was just looking to go out drinking every day. Little things like successes at work, spending the evening watching TV with my girlfriend, etc...these are the joys that I've realized through my sobriety. I think the biggest joy that I've felt is that I am now in control of my own life and whatever joy I may bring to it. -Andy


Member: Joe B.
Location: Charleston,W.V.
Remote Name: 152.163.253.70
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 05:23 PM -0400

Comments

Hi gang,congrats to r. Sobriety is not all peaches and cream, it has its ups and downs. Can we settle for a more modest lifestyle than bfor?. Mines ok, its pretty good, its better than B4. It works. Thanks, Joe B.


Member: Mike L
Location: kzoo Mi
Remote Name: 24.176.12.155
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 11:25 PM -0400

Comments

Rarely- congratulations on 31 years. I could list all the things I've achieved in 2 1/2 years of sobriety like returning to school, being able to support myself, making the people who care about me proud of me, and so on. To tell you the truth, the biggest thing that brings me joy now is just knowing that things will change and there's always something to look forward to. Even when I'm depressed or hurting, I know it's not going to stay like that. When I drank or did drugs because I was depressed, eeven for the few hours that I was drunk or whatever, I knew that nothing had really changed and nothing was going to. Today, even my setbacks bring me a kind of joy because I know when it comes right down to it, the only thing that can really beat me is myself and as long as I'm sober, that's not going to happen.


Member: jimr
Location: chicago
Remote Name: 69.3.218.230
Date: 05 Apr 2004
Time: 11:36 PM -0400

Comments

congratulations ron the rocket. It's good to see most of your journey has been joyous. Riches are rarley measured in gold. Truth and love are the real riches to behold. 31 years, fantastic!


Member: RayC
Location: Haines Alaska
Remote Name: 64.186.108.61
Date: 06 Apr 2004
Time: 12:51 AM -0400

Comments

Congrats rarely and thanks for the reminder that sober dosn't mean somber.Took my last drink in 76 but sucked down a few doobies while trudging that road of destiny so won't say that my times all been sober but couldn't say that about my many alcohol and drug free years anyway.Point is mines a daily program contingent on daily maintiance and sobriety to me is to be able to live a serene,life and experience that joy you speak of.I've chosen to spend my life as a working musician,spending alot of time working in bar bands but in spite of the negative atmosphere of the envirorment I've had much joy,seen alot of places,known love and just plain had a interesting and meaningfull life.Something I'd never had been able to do drinking.Now I'm older,working a rather boring $10 an hour job temporaratily and not a bit sorry because I made a choice to live a life I choose rather than what most people expected of me and am a active member of a small AA group here in the middle of nowhere.I've learned to live and let live,blame no one but me for my attitude and am damn happy to be alive knowing the hard times do past when I hang in there and do what I need to to change my attitude...think I'm getting long winded here...just wanted to say AA's done great things for me and I'm grateful for you all for helping me through another 24 hours.


Member: Joni N.
Location: Pollock Pines, CA
Remote Name: 158.222.225.2
Date: 06 Apr 2004
Time: 03:55 AM -0400

Comments

Hi, ((everyone)). Rarely, congratulations on your 31 years of sobriety, and on your 9 years of sobriety, Lisa. What I have received in my sobriety as a direct result of working 12 spiritual steps is way beyond my wildest dreams. My life is FULL of joy! How can it not be when I compare my life today with the life I had when I came to the Program? Even when life doesn't go my way today, it's so much better than what I had. I used to try to kill myself. Today, I experience moments of wonder. Every time I think my life can't get any better, it gets better!! For those of you who are new to the Program, please stay. You can't imagine what is in store for you. Living in joy can become a way of life! Hugs, Joni Peace and Love


Member: Rarely
Location: rontherocket@hotmail.com
Remote Name: 207.161.35.64
Date: 06 Apr 2004
Time: 11:29 AM -0400

Comments

Rarely and Im an alcoholic. As a kid I never had a Mom or Dad, brought up in the welfare system I landed in a foster home where I was told that being native I wasen't expected to do good in school, I have scars and lumps for every time I done some thing wrong I was beat on the top of my head and blood would trickle down my neck, As a kid I can not remember ever being hugged kissed or held. When I had my first drink at 17 yrs. old it made me feel warm, allowed me to be some body, I fell in love with it Someone once said, " alcohol gave me wings to fly, then it took away the sky," I worked underground in the northern Canadian mines. making big money even though I only had a grade six. Then every thing turned on me. They say you have to hit bottom in this program and I hit bottom so many times. lost wife and kids, house and car, good jobs, self respect and the ability to love, landed in jails with a sentence almost 20 times, became the bootlegger and drug pusher. In the end I never worked for over 18 months, We had no running water, indoor plumbing, food on the table, she was alcoholic with 3 kids, Hitting bottom was a every day occurance for example one morning I got out of that bed that had the springs sticking out walked into the kitchen and she was sitting at the table with a black eye and fat lip, Then I remembered what I had done to her the night before and for lack of anything else to say I asked what happened. she looked at me out of her one good eye and said, " Ron when your beating me up don't put the boots to me," I stood there and thought what an animal I had become, spotted the bottle of wine poured a drink and made it through another day. I was faceing 5 criminal charges I had stabbed the hotel manager 3 times, drug charge, possession of stolen property, B&E a guy from A.A. came and talked to me. He told me to stay sober one day at a time and that nothing but good would happen to me. That was 31 yrs. ago yesterday, I faced those charges and got 1 yr. probation, with my record a miracle. After 9 months sober I went to work in the field of alcoholism for the Department of Health and Social Welfare, With my grade six I was an educational specialist going into schools talking about drugs and alcohol abuse. Went to work for the largest hospital in our capital city as a Prime Therapist, in the alcohol treatment unit. Seven yrs later I returned to mining and became a supervisor, What a ride and I owe it all to a God of my understanding and this program of A.A. that Im still active in ( yesterday I was at two meetings two different groups,)Just back from a holiday in Arizona where I met AZbill, Im 67 yrs old and two weeks ago got married in a little white chapel in Las Vegas. Im retired and love to play golf and have won my share of local tournaments. Yesterday my wife alcoholic 21 years sober took me out on the town for lunch. Last night I spent the evening with some of the guys I sponsor some are new to the program and some have over 20 yrs sober. Life is so exciting, good friends, respect, love, and all the promises. I was given a pardon for my crimes," BEYOND MY WILDEST EXPECTATIONS " I love you all, Rarely


Member: Shari G
Location: Massillon, OH
Remote Name: 24.140.72.46
Date: 06 Apr 2004
Time: 12:55 PM -0400

Comments

Congratulations Rarely!! I only have a year or so under my belt and you give me proof of the joys that this program can give us. My life is so much better than I ever expected. I have a sponser who has become my best friend and many new friends who are always there for me through thick and thin. I count my blessings everyday, keep spiritually fit and work my steps. I never imagined that life could be this good!!! I am forever grateful.


Member: Betsy
Location: Washington
Remote Name: 67.168.35.179
Date: 06 Apr 2004
Time: 05:04 PM -0400

Comments

Rarely, congratulations on 31 years! And Lisa, congrats on 9! Joe B., Charleston -- you are right, sobriety is not all peaches and cream. When we sober up we are given the chance to experience and enjoy life, to return to being (or simply become) happy, productive members of society. Not a ticket to Nirvana, for sure. I sobered up almost 25 years ago and in that time there have been any number of tragedies in my family. I've also gotten married, miraculously had a beautiful child, and otherwise enjoyed things that I never even imagined could happen to me. Last year I was diagnosed with a progressive form of MS, a form that has no remissions, only gradually increasing disabilities. The thing about a sober life for me, though, is that with all the ups and downs there has never, and I mean NEVER, been the soul-grinding, day in day out misery and despair that was present before. Life is a precious gift to me, and I embrace it, warts and all! Hugs, Betsy


Member: Adam H.
Location: New York, NY
Remote Name: 64.232.156.194
Date: 07 Apr 2004
Time: 11:21 AM -0400

Comments

Adam, alcoholic. Congratulations Rarely and Lisa! And Betsy from Washington, thank you for your share too. Right now, my life is neither peaches nor cream. Won't go into it here; I have a sponsor that I am working and talking with. But what I can say is this: I know through my experience as a sober member of AA that so much depends on my attitude, and for me today, the joy of living is having the opportunity to trust that the pain of what I am going through today will one day be the experience, strength and hope that I pass on to a newcomer tomorrow. I can't tell you how much better I feel knowing that. That was certainly not how I looked at things before Alcoholics Anonymous, and I'm very lucky to have learned through experience and over time that people change...including me. It's a joy to know that I have a design for living that works in rough going. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: PattiK
Location: catskills
Remote Name: 66.82.9.39
Date: 07 Apr 2004
Time: 02:14 PM -0400

Comments

Congratulations Rarely on your 31 years. I'm heading for 8 and I never would have believed it could happen. Am I joyous every minute? No. Not every minute, but deep inside I have a closeness with my higher power that gets me through whatever comes my way, one day at a time. I have pride today, self esteem, I never do anything I can't share with everyone the next day. That is a big part of my joy, no more shame, no more hiding, lying, covering my steps, wondering where my steps took me. Alcoholism is truly a baffling powerful disease and my happiness comes from my sobriety. I never forget where I was, I don't "regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it". that one promise was so out of reach when I came in, so hard to understand and now it has come true. This program is truly a life saver. Good day today to everyone and thanks for letting me share. Patti


Member: ljs
Location: usa
Remote Name: 216.138.5.59
Date: 07 Apr 2004
Time: 06:48 PM -0400

Comments

Congratulations on 31 years! A friend of mine recently celebrated 34 years. You folks have so much to be proud of. You're an inspiration. Thanks so much.


Member: Barry D
Location: Calgary Alberta Canada
Remote Name: 68.145.97.110
Date: 07 Apr 2004
Time: 07:31 PM -0400

Comments

Congrats to the B Day people and thankyou Rarely for sharing your experience, strength and hope. Ever consider how many lives you've touched? There have been many people from all walks of life and spiritual understanding who have helped me along the way. Many Native freinds and a man i'll call Black E were some of the most influential. Black E helped bring a great deal more focus to my prayer, meditation and self examination. He helped me to really see the world with a new set of eyes, sense, smell and touch. Similar to our 12x12 Step 11 though i do not beleive he was an alcoholic, he had been through the emotional wringer just the same. AA taught me to pray, "only for knowledge of Gods will for us and the power to carry that out", and depending on circumstance to add "Knowledge of Gods Will for us, whatever that might be". This was pretty humbling for a guy like me to practise as for many years i presumed to know what Gods will was for everyone. Black E taught me this prayer: " God of my understanding, have mercy on us and provide us only with knowlegde of your will for us and the power to carry that out. This i pray for all my relatives of all colours in the North, South, East and West the two legged, four legged, creepy crawler, winged ones, water people Grand mother and Grand father earth. Please show mercy on us all and provide us with Courage, Wisdom and Strength". i have used this prayer along with those AA has taught me and a few that learned in my Irish upbringing. A sponsor also taught me that as i continued on this journey that i would become sensitive to, take pleasure in and notice things i hadn't appreciated in a very long time. As an excercise to get out of myself he suggested that when these things were realized all i needed to say in acknowledgement to my higher power as i understood him was "Thankyou". The "Thankyou" prayer is something i now use constantly (ie.) when i notice a childs smile, smell of spring, two elderly people holding hands, fresh cut grass, tears of gratitude from an AA accepting card ... ad infinitum. Thankyou for sharing Rarely, i was given a gift of reflection recently which caused me to reflect back to my Step 5,6 and 7 experience. i would like to share that gift with the B Day people as a B Day gift. It is found in AA Book, "Pass it On" Pg 242-243. In Gratitude, Thankyou all for the Joy of my sobriety.


Member: Stephen C
Location: North Stratford,N.H.
Remote Name: 165.121.132.102
Date: 08 Apr 2004
Time: 11:00 PM -0400

Comments

Hello to you all and a special congradulation to rontherocketfor your 31 years of total soberity and hope to see you for another 31 years,well I just made it to 10 months of pure but rough soberity and I do alot of service work and love evry min. of it and so if there is anyone that needs a hand,or a talk im here and responisble and you can reach me at the following emails fruitbomber20027@hotmail.com and germgrabber2000@yahoo.com and so alos to all have a wonderful Happy Easter.


Member: zak T
Location: Barrow, AK Barrow, AK
Remote Name: 209.165.150.195
Date: 09 Apr 2004
Time: 04:58 AM -0400

Comments

When I was about two years sober, I was onboard a warship during the first Gulf War. We had three thousand Marines in a space ideally suited for a quarter of that number. I was standing, eating terrible bland food with my hands because there was no room to sit and not enough silverware to go around. It was over a hundred degrees and a generally stressful environment. For the first time in my life, at that moment I felt good and light and I was smiling which was very uncommon. My entire life up until that moment had been in a greater or lesser state of depression. It was the first moment of joy I had ever experienced. I had a sponsor and a sponsee on that ship. I was working the steps as I had been taught by my previous sponsors. I was attending both meetings that we had each week. I was spending as much time as I could with fellow recovering alcoholics, and I was praying like I meant it every day. I used to pray to want what I have, Love what I do and for the willingness to recover. That brief moment of joy that came during a time of duress and chaos has reminded me through the years that situations have little bearing on how I feel. Today, that light happy feeling is with me quite often, though not constantly. I take life as it comes. If I stay close to my Creator and do as He would have me do, I feel joy. When I stray I cut myself of from that joy and reap the whirlwind of my actions. Sometimes, I still pray to want what I have, Love what I do and for the willingness to recover. Most of the time, however, I simply pray, "God, use me." Then I shut up and get on with life.


Member: Cathy H. D.
Location: Albany, Ca.
Remote Name: 216.100.135.132
Date: 09 Apr 2004
Time: 04:21 PM -0400

Comments

Hi all, My name is Cathy H.D., and I am an alcoholic. Ron, wow, Congrats on 31 years, that is amazing. Thank you also for your beautiful share, it's one of the loveliest I've ever heard. Joy is a wonderful topic. I had never, ever, experienced it until I got sober. One day, I just had a feeling I did not recognize. I had no idea what it was. Finally, I realized for me that it is happiness mixed with serenity. Since I had never had any real lasting serenity, I was unable to feel Joy. Today, it is one of my very favorite feelings. I often think about it in terms of "Happy, Joyous and Free." On even my worst days, I am at least free from the bondage of "King Alcohol." ; ) Today is the first day I have posted to this site, but I've been "lurking" for a little while now. This is a great site! Thank you to everyone who shared. -Cathy H.D.


Member: sherylH
Location: massachusetts
Remote Name: 68.160.6.12
Date: 09 Apr 2004
Time: 08:14 PM -0400

Comments

Congratulations on your 31 years.. this past March I had 11 years.. I have recently gone out and am having a difficult time going back.. I have my spirituallity.. I read my meditations and don't know why I wasn't able to continute on.. I went to a meeting my 11 year anniversary and my sponsor cheered for me. it was very difficult. I have many excuses like us alcoholics do but I can't seem to get back.. Pride.. vanity... depression.. can't figure it out.. the program gave me my GOD.. being Easter I'm feeling extremlyguilty.. I need help .. I've heard and and know it.. I love the program.. having difficulties.. God Bless sheryl H


Member: stuartf
Location: london uk
Remote Name: 217.44.68.38
Date: 09 Apr 2004
Time: 09:30 PM -0400

Comments

funny how you I hear loads of things trotted out at AA meetings...and repeat them myself...until I examine the truth based on my experience. eg "AA was founded on one drunk talkin to another" No it wasn't AA was founded on one recovered alcoholic - Bill W. carrying the message to an alcoholic who couldn't stop drinking and wanted desperately to do so - DR. Bob. I talked to loads of drunks when I was drinking and never got sober


Member: Barb Mc
Location: PA
Remote Name: 68.236.4.219
Date: 09 Apr 2004
Time: 11:28 PM -0400

Comments

Good evening. Barbara, alcoholic. Rarely congratulations on your 31 years. My goal is to have 40 years in this wonderful program and walk into a meeting with my cane and use it to pound this program into all the hard headed newcomers. Just a dream. If I get 40 years I'll be 90. But then if I had continued drinking I would have been dead at 50. I don't think I'll ever be able to count the joys this life has given me. No every day easy. Life happens and life isn't always full of happy surprises. Sometimes the surprises are not so great. But as long as I don't pick up alcohol, put the Steps in my life and let God do His thing I can handle it. Right now I'm very tired and very peaceful. Saturday I drove 14 hours to be with my sister when she went through some medical stuff. I drove home yesterday and got here at 9 p.m. My body felt like it was viberating from the ride. If I was still drinking I can assure you that I would not have been there for my sister. I probably would have said, "F--- you. Take care of yourself". The ability to be there for someone, family, friend or sponsee, is a joy in itself. My daughter and her family will be coming to visit for Easter. I dyed eggs today for the first time in years so I could put them in my grandchildren's baskets. It also made my Mother happy to have an old tradition back in her home. Her smile was worth every minute I spent with those eggs. Those are the things that make me happiest, bringing joy to someone else. The world doesn't revolve around Barbara any longer. I have found that giving of myself brings more joy than I can contain. It just spills over into the rest of my life. And in about 25 years if you hear stories of some old bat beating up or trying to beat up newcomers it will be me. I will have reached my goal. Thank you all for being here.


Member: Joy S
Location: Charleston SC
Remote Name: 152.163.253.70
Date: 10 Apr 2004
Time: 08:30 AM -0400

Comments

Congraduations Rarely! So glad to see this site has been revamped for the serious, I haven't been here for awhile. I used to regularly claim I would never find happiness on this planet. I spent alot of my life drunk over what I considered the injustices of life as I knew it. Both personal and global. In sobriety, as others shared thier dissapointments and sometimes blamed God or someone for them, I realize that I never have bought into the idea of the world as a perfect place, I always believed it contained both positive and negative and that it was meant to be dual. My pain- I have been through my share -and my fear that I would always live in pain, turned me cynical and allowed me to justify sedating myself. I wore rose colored glasses and wished for another reality ( an easier softer way perhaps?!) and was hurt when it didn't materialize. But I didn't do anything but drink and rage or cry about my plight. When I got to AA I was heartbroken and sick and when I drank I blacked out and did stupid Sh*&. Thank HP this is a program of acceptance AND action. Acceptance allowed me to throw away those vision altering glasses and have the wonderful as well as the awful, and action moved me away from accepting the awful for myself every day, one day at a time. The world changed not at all. The things that drove me, drunk, to the edge of suicide still exist today, side by side with my sobriety. The magnitude of that understanding, that truth, fills me with a joy I thought was only for others. That I am allowed to have it amazed me constantly. One of the self help gurus says " Sell your cleverness and purchase bewilderment" Reminds me of "Take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth" One of my first actions on the road to acceptance, the road that gives me a joyous life- one day at a time. Thank you for your shares they really help me.


Member: Lissa T.
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Remote Name: 4.240.39.175
Date: 11 Apr 2004
Time: 01:37 AM -0400

Comments

Hi, my name is Lissa, and I am an alcoholic. I have found much joy in AA, but I freely admit that right now I am struggling. On February 29th, at approximately 2:00 pm, I broke my leg in two places. I was in the process of preparing my husband's memorial. He had died 4 days before. (I did not get to attend the memorial) I am confined in a wheelchair, and last Thursday I was given the news that I would be confined for another 3 weeks. I know that this too shall pass, I know that my life is in perfect divine order, even if I do not understand it, because I am sustained by the love of God. I am frightened by the fact that I am addicted on pain meds and I am frightened about how I am going to manage. Right now I am in a safe place, if anywhere can be safe. When I get out of this cast I still won't be able to get around and, oh well, it takes too long to explain. My email is lissatav9@yahoo.com, if anyone has some words of encouragement for me. Thank you for letting me share.