Member: Geri W
Location: Virginia
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 09:11:56
Geri, a very grateful alcoholic here. Anyone have anything to share about the "promises" that have come true for them since beginning the program of recovery?
Member: PAULAC
Location: VERMONT
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 10:23:44
Comments
MY NAME IS PAULA C I AM AN ALCOHOLIC VISITING VERMONT I LOOKED FOR A AA MEETING BUT SO
THEN I DECIDED TO TRY TOFIND A MEETING ONLINE ON THE TOPIC OF THE PROMISES WHERE IT
SAYS YOU WILL BE AMAZED BEFORE YOU ARE HALF WAY THROUGH THIS HAS CERTAINLY BEEN TRUE FOR
ME ALTHOUGH I CANNOT ALWAYS SEE THIS LOTS OF THINGS I CAN ONLY SEE IN RETROSPECT SO DURING
TIMES THAT I CAN NOT SEE THE PROMISES COMING TRUE ,I NOW HAVE THE EXPERIENCE TO KNOW THEY
ARE EVEN WHEN I AM NOT AWARE OF IT I DO KNOW A NEW FREEDOM THAT ONLY LIVING ONE DAY AT A
TIME CAN BRING THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE TODAY SO I COULD HAVE A MEETING
Member: Michael M.
Location: Miami
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 10:25:29
Thanks for the help yesterday.
I've never been able to really look people in the eye when I'm talking with them, now I can. Since I've turned over everything to my HP, most of the time, I have no fear of economic insecruity. When I do, I "reconnect" throguh prayer and meditation and by going to a meeting. Most importantly, the fear that made me want to drink has left me most of the time. I was always afraid of not being "a part of," but the program, the people in it, and my HP have taken that fear away. And if it comes back, and I feel the beginning of an urge to take a drink, I know what to do to "reconnect. It seems that I feel the "Promises" best when I'm able to help another alcoholic.
Member: neal m
Location: zimbabwe
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 10:51:13
i had to have it pointed out to me by my sponser that the BB says that the FEAR of economic insecurity will leave us--it doesn't say anything about getting rich--i'm basically broke but i think that if i LIVE RIGHT i will be taken care of.
Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 11:05:11
Larry, fellow alcoholic and Virginian Geri. Good, positive topic.
Here are the promises that have come true in my life and how it happened:
"We are going to know a new freedom..." This promise began to come true almost immediately, when the compulsion to drink was lifted. At the time, I thought "I'm free!" I stopped going to AA for a long time until a tragedy occurred in my life and I realized I wasn't really free yet. My fears, resentments, self-pity, etc. were still imprisoning me. After working my 4th/5th Steps, I became free of the old resentments and much of the guilt. Shortly thereafter, I became aware of how much my character defects were weighing me down. Doing Steps 6 & 7 helped with that, but I still have a lot of work to do. So for me, this new freedom has been obtained gradually by working the steps and the process is still ongoing.
"We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it." Through Steps 4 and 5 I stopped regretting the past. I do not wish to shut the door on it either - I am still in the process of making amends to those I harmed, which is helping me to become free of residual guilt.
"We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us" This began during my 3rd Step and continues as I work Step 11. If I get out of my own way and let go, especially when I'm dealing with a particularly difficult problem, the right answer always seems to come to me. I have come to rely on this guidance and then proceed confidently to deal with situations which used to paralyze me with fear.
As far as fear of people and financial insecurity, selfishness, selk-seeking, etc., these are slowly coming true in my life as well. My whole attitude and outlook upon life has changed dramatically, and I have been granted serenity and peace-of-mind. But these fears still affect me sometimes. However, I don't panic anymore. In many ways, my financial condition is more precarious than when I was drinking, but I can deal with the situation calmly now. It's not always easy, but I now have faith that it will all work out as long as I face my problems and take ACTION. When I was drinking and later when I was a dry drunk, my "actions" usually consisted of worrying, blaming others, and feeling sorry for myself. Now I can soberly assess my situation and work through it. As I continue to reconnect with others by working Steps 9 & 10 & 12, my fear of people dissipates and I find myself acting less selfishly.
So I am far from being able to claim that all the promises have come true in my life. But they've all come true partially and a couple have come true completely. Many are true sometimes, but not always. Being able to see that they continue to come true in direct proportion to how well I work my program gives me the faith and inspiration to continue trudging this road of Happy Destiny.
Thanks for letting me share. Peace & Serenity.
Member: irish peter
Location: australia
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 11:52:41
hi my name is peter and its through the grace of god and this fellowship that im sober today. i've just found this site and i must say that im very impressed ..........CONGRATULATIONS to all concerned. it took me a long time to accept the fact that if i handed ALL my problems over to my higher power and then with faith patience and the help of the serenity prayer my fear of my economic insecurity would leave me. i also had to take advice from my sponser and all he said was to continue doing what i was doing attend loads of meetings and stay employed!!! it makes sense. will visit again soon.........peter
Member: Robin L
Location: Phila
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 13:43:43
Hi everyone. My name is Robin and I am a very grateful recovering alcoholic. I just celebrated 8 years of continuous sobriety. I am grateful for this web site since I hate going out in the cold and dark night air during the winter months. I don't subscribe to AOL and I hear that they have an online meeting that is structured like and actual meeting that you would attend outside of cyberspace. Does anybody know of any other online meetings like the AOL meeting that is accessible to people that don't subscribe. I'm glad that this one is available. I met up with someone today that picked yp after 18 years of sobriety. She is not back yet and is really struggling. I don't want that to ever be me. I know that I can become complacent. Especially if I don't go to enough meetings. My sponsor doesn't know that I have been slacking off on my meetings. I am keeping secrets and I know that secrets will keep me sick. Thanks for letting me share.
Member: Deanna E.
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 13:52:07
Hi, I'm Deanna and I am an alcoholic.
I am 21 days sober today and even though I am not well versed in the steps or the BB, I feel God's presence right now and know that if I keep my promise of doing the steps and staying sober that everything He has promised will come. Pray for me that I will have another 24 hours in this wonderful feeling of sobriety.
Deanna
Member: mary t
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 14:02:34
today is my first day without a drink. i cant figure out how i'll get past 5 oclock. how did you all actually start? any suggestions? thank you.
Member: leo
Location: Edmonton,ab.canada
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 14:14:30
Hi, Leo here an alcoholic! Good day all! been in the program for a few 24s. I basically follow the suggestions of the prgram about focussing on my sobriety. I have along experienced many things that are mentioned in the promises. I agree with our friend from zimbawe that take care of today, plan intelligently, pray and somehow things always work out. This is not say to that they turn out according to the way i want. but the outcomes that occur has always been good in a long run. Good luck to all of you. thank goodness for online A.A. Really enjoying it.
Member: Michael M.
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 14:16:00
Mary T, I don't know where you are at and what AA meetings you can go to, but it really helped me when I started to go to a lot of meetings. It is reccomended to go to 90 meetings in 90 days. But, when I first started, and enven now, it is better for me just to look at just one day at a time, or sometimes just one hour or minute at a time. By going to a meeting and talking, and listening to other people I realized I was not alone and other people have or were going through the same things I am. I had to find someone I could talk to and identify with, and eventually began working the 12 steps with. I had to get the Alcoholics Anonymous Book, "The Big Book," and start reading it and finding out how and why AA works.
Member: Joan W
Location: Upstate NY
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 14:38:40
Hi everyone;
I am an alcoholic and my name is Joan.
Wow, Larry, great posting!! I too felt a 'new freedom and a new happiness' immediately after surrendering to the disease and to the solution (AA). I recognized that God was doing for me what I could not do for myself. I trusted God completely in regard to alcoholism. This was the greatest gift I have ever or will ever received. I do not wish to shut the door on the past, and I have come to know peace and sernity. Some of the time.
My character defects prevent me from TOTALLY acheiving the other promises. While I am no where near as fearful as I used to be, I do have to continue to work on these defects and I do believe that I will grow in these promises, if I follow the path laid out so lovingly by those who went before me, and those who now travel the road with me.
My failure to achieve these promises with greater consistency is, I believe, due to my far less than perfect faith. I think that God has taken care of the biggest problem I have ever faced, and sometimes feel I have reached my quota with Him, or that He has too much else to concern Himself with to be bothered by my pickayune worries. When I feel I have to take care of certain things myself the fear returns.
Ah well, progress, right, not perfection.
mary t, I remember well the feelings that you have today. Please call AA (listed in the phone book) in your area and ask them where there is a meeting near you. Ask if you can speak with a member of AA. Go to a meeting and let some women know you are new. They will probably give you some phone numbers. Then you can call them anytime you feel like taking a drink. You never HAVE to drink again, and you never HAVE to be alone again, either. You just have to stay away from the first drink for this day. If you want to talk my e-mail address is ILizzyT@excite.com
Thanks everybody for helping me to stay sober today.
May God bless us, every one.
Love, Joan
Member: todd d.
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 14:45:00
hello, my name is todd d. and i am a very grateful recovering alcoholic. i want to thank god and the program of alcoholics anonymous for saving my life. this journey has been eventfull and hard but well worth it. as my sponsor would say to me '' you've never had it so good'' and he is right. this is the best i have ever had it, and it is never as hard as it used to be when i was drinking. this has only come from the grace god has shown me and the program of alcoholics anonymous. staying grateful!!! todd d.
Member: Jerry M
Location: Painter Va
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 14:45:07
the promises were read at quite a few meeting early on in my sobriety and they looked like quite an extravigant list for someone who didnot want to be here anyway but by not drinking and trying to practice the program of AA I have experenced them all at varying times and now live a reasonably happy life that is so completly diffrent than i could imagine sobriety would be i allways equated sober and somber (not so now
Member: JB
Location: Minneapolis
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 16:17:28
My name is J and I am a grateful alcoholic. I have been looking forward all day to getting on line with the Coffee Pot discussion meeting. And then to see it is one of my favorite topics! Wow! Thank you Gen for an excellent suggestion. I carry a copy of the promises in my dayrunner and look at them frequently. This afternoon I was confronted with my past and while I was pondering some of my pre sobriety behavior I realized I didn't want to "shut the door on it." When my husband asked me what I was thinking about since I had been so quiet for so long in the car I said I was thinking about my past and feeling ashamed. He said but that's in your past you have to let that go. And I replied, "but it is a healthy shame, the kind of shame that stops you from repeating that behavior again." And I realized it was true. Thanks to AA and therapy I am no longer a shame based person. I can freely choose what behaviors best support the kind of woman I want to be: responsible, loving, sober and unselfish. The promises have definitely come true for me: I have a new freedom and a new happiness. Bless you all and I wish you peace. J.
Member: Archie C.
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 16:27:35
I guess since I've know long periods of sobriety and very short ones I can only wish that I could grasp the concept of a HP. I went over 5 years without drinking but never gained the HP experience. Since then I've fallen, many times over many years. The idea of speaking openly is also not my favorite, and certainly has lead to my many failures. It is amazing to me how I can fail so many times, hurt so many people and yet not get it. It almost seems that all recovering alcoholics are either on a death wish or a healthy course.
Member: Robin L
Location: Phila
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 16:46:45
Mary T Get yourself to a meeting. Raise your hand and tell everyone that you are new to AA and sobriety. Ask for some phone numbers of other women in the rooms. Don't be afraid to call. We have all been where you are now and we have all felt the way you are feeling today. You are not unique. You never have to feel this way again. AA saved my life. Just for today-Go to a meeting,and don't drink. You are a winner. Robin L
Member: Barry M.
Location: Vliia Grove, IL
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 16:58:23
Hello everyone- barry here, alcoholic/drug addict. haven't been around too long - only long enough to know that AA does not have to promise me anything for me to keep coming back. If those things happen, and it seems that they have for others, then that is great. I wonder if they are called 9 th step promises for a reason, though? That being that, like most everything else in life, they certainly do not come for free. It takes work on my part - i.e. at least some work on the 8 steps that come prior to # 9. you know what I mean?? Hey, I'll keep coming back 'cause AA is where I need to be today!! Catch you guys later .........
PS Leo in Edmonton - Go Oilers!!!!!!! HP please send a goaltender! Thx.....
Member: Jill W
Location: Massachusetts
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 16:59:28
This is my first time around in the program. After 22 years of drinking, I realized that I just didn't know how to deal with feelings ... of any kind ... and with life in general. I had stopped growing up when I picked up the drink. I've been in the program for a little while now and I'm learning to grow up. I did 90 meetings in 90 days and took most suggestions that were given because I knew if I were left to my own devices ... I would screw up. I still take suggestions and try to have an open mind but the real work has started for me just recently when I joined an AWOL. I am bound and determined to work through these steps ... I'm so hung up on "getting it right" that I realized that I had a lot of fear about doing them. I guess it's progress ... not perfection. I hope I can lose the fear and gain the freedom. God bless you all.
Member: Susan S.
Location: Alexandria, Va.
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 17:00:07
hello my name is Susan and I am an alcoholic. I have never been on an on-line meeting so this is very interesting. I have been sober over 17 years, and the promises do come true. Staying sober required me to stay willing to change each year. I always listen to the stories about the people with alot of sobriety going back out, because I got sober fairly young, and have alot of years left to stay sober for. It is neat to hear from other countries, having lived and drank overseas. "You will find a new kind of freedom..." has come true, and was what I was looking for in the bottle, freedom from my self-destructive thoughts that got me in trouble. I heard a phrase last night in a meeting, "my brain is out to get my ass" sorry for the profanity, it was the quote.
Member: Ladd G.
Location: Wetumpka Al-USA
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 17:33:58
Hi all Ladd Alcoholic,Firstto Mary Ther are many things that can help the first few days.sweets.Orange juice.honey. The most important for me was people,people,people,If you can use the phone today,someone is waiting for your call,answer there prayer and ask for ther help.Please let us know how you do you are the most important person on line today...God bless you,you can do it. As to the promises,Last night at our monthly chip celibration I celibrated 4 years sober with my home group.I went homeless to a nice home,Idident know were my children were next week I fly to Tx to spend a week with my Daughter,I have my on business today and as long as I do my part I have every confidence the bills will be paid.Last week the cops hit there lights behind me,my only thought was to find a safe place to pull over,I had real friends on every side last night,and many rough times have taken place the last 2 years,Im setting here today on-line and sober not enything Ive done, you see Im a gutter drunk.Through the programe of AA,help of HP,a good sponsore and the love of other members Im free to go enywere in the world.Baby the promises are there,thay happen,and thay are well worth the effort,If nothing else I have shared with you were true,I havent had a Drink all day.You helped make that happen...Love Ladd
Member: Teri B.
Location: Texas
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 17:42:14
Hello my name is Teri B. alcoholic/addict
I did not decide I wanted to get sober, believe me that was the farthest thing from my mind. My family (which I was trying one more time to scam) forced me into treatment. I had already lost my home, my child was with my mother and I was in trouble with some not so nice people and as usual I was looking to my family to help me yet again, only this time they really did help me. I thought I can go to a treatment center for 30 days then come out and my family will think I'm cured and they will hand out the money. That treatment center changed my life, I was there two days when we went the church across the street for my first AA meeting and I can only explain it as a spiritual awakening. I was told of the promises and how by following the instructions in the BB the promises would come true for me as well. I have my son back, I have an apartment, a car, a career(thats on hold for the moment) and most importantly I have my sobriety, after twentythree years of lying, cheating and stealing I have a life. Thank you for letting me share.
Teri B.
Member: J.B.
Location: Or.
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 18:06:32
Mary T I know it sounds overly simple, but just don't drink. Change whatever it is you do a 5 oclock. Call an A.A. hotline ask for a ride to a meeting. When you get there tell them I don't get past 5 oclock. Yes eat the sweets, but don't get carried away it raises your blood sugar like alcohol but it also bottoms out and you get the cravings again. So try the juice, and just sit on your hands. Then one day at a time keep doing things differant than you used to do them. If you really can't do it alone, take step two and ask God for some help, even if you can't concieve of a God he has every concept of you.That might work for you to Archie. It took me years to get rid of all my preconceived notions of God. Out with the rituals, out with the religions, and just came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity. Guess what I finally had the H.P experiance I was looking for. Then the gifts started coming to me. All the things that need to get through life today, on lifes'terms. It's not always easy but it is always real. Today I am grateful and I don't ever want to slip into that complacent place where I forget to say so. Thanks for letting me share. J.B.
Member: Jackie B.
Location: Clarion, PA
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 19:04:12
Hey ya'll...alcoholic named Jackie. I'm new to this forum and it's great to find another meeting online. To the topic...the promises scared me at first coz I never had happiness or freedom and always functioned without others in mind, only self, so these promises were foreign to me. But, as it says, "we will be amazed" and I was. Whenever I get stuck in my own head, the promises give me hope that this too shall pass. It is my experience that the promises are the opposite of my defects of character. Thanks for readin my stuff. Peace, Jackie
Member: Dora G
Location: Virginia
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 19:19:17
hi i'm dora and i'm an alcoholic the promises started to appear after i did the work the serenity and peace in my life now are truely astounding ....for the newcomer i can only share my experienc, strength and hope .... when i got here i was told that i should get a sponser, go to meetings and not drink one day at a time and it has worked like that for me for quite a long time now.. so my suggestion to you is to get a sponsor and use them, go to meetings(lots of them) and don't drink one day at a time .... try it and the rewards will amaze you
Member: Chuck R.
Location: Winnsboro, SC
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 19:24:09
The promise which contains the phrase "you will see how your experience can benefit others." has not only "come true" for me, it has given me riches beyond the simple notion of forgiveness. It has led me to see that God created me alcoholic for a reason, that the the reason has something to do with other (perhaps newer) members whom I may never know I have "benefitted." I try to remember that what I am saying may be meaningful to someone else at a moment that only gods can create. So I better be telling the truth.
Member: Teri F.
Location: Marion, Ohio
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 19:33:13
Hi everyone. I'm an alcoholic and my name is Teri. I'm very grateful to be sober this evening and to be involved in a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Thanks Geri W. for the topic. In my neck of the woods the "Promises" are read at the beginning of most meetings. When I first got sober, it took me a while to really hear what those promises said. When I was finally able to comprehend what was being read, I experienced my very first feelings of HOPE. When I realized that those promises came from the Big Book (that took awhile--my brain was pretty pickled!), I read them over and over again. At that time, I never thought in my wildest dreams that any of those wonderful things would happen to me. Just didn't see how that could be possible. I was a hopeless, helpless, useless falling down drunk who had done a whole lot of horrible things in my life, and as a result of my alcoholism, had harmed just about everyone I'd ever come in contact with. I didn't want to beleive there was a God--that was way too scary. I knew if there was a God, and if He noticed that my sorry ass was looking at those promises, he'd throw me out of AA for sure! I'm so glad that, as usual, I was wrong.
It took awhile but after I worked those first nine steps, the promises started coming true for me! Imagine that! Today I can honestly say that I've experienced each one of them. And the longer I stay sober and the more I practice these principles and carry the message of recovery, the more those promises enrich my life. It all happens exactly the way the book says.
For me, just not drinking a day at a time was only the beginning. This program, the 12 steps, and a God of my understanding have given me a design for living that is more wonderful than anything I could have ever imagined or hoped for while I was drinking.
It happened for me and it can happen for you. Just keep coming back!
Thanks for letting me share.
Member: Steve D.
Location: Montgomery, AL
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 19:48:03
Hello everyone, my name is Steve and I'm an alcoholic. My sponsee, Ladd, invited me to the meeting tonight. The topic of the promises is right on time for me. I know when I first began the AA way of life, I heard the promises read at the beginning of every meeting, and I wanted them to come true in my life also. They have, over the past years. But early in my recovery, I had to realize that my problem is a spiritual malady which expresses itself in my resorting to alcohol to cope with life. You see, alcohol "fixes" things quickly: it numbs. My problem was I had no way to control my feelings. As the others have suggested, don't isolate, talk to other recovering alcoholics. Also, take the promises, and the and the 12 Steps and put them together. For example: We admited we were powerless over alcohol and our lives had become unmanageable. (If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.) Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. (We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.) Continue following each step with the next sentence from the promises. This helped me realize that the promises, like the steps, are not an event but rather a process. You'll be in my prayers. Thanks for letting me share.
Member: BrianG
Location: CT, USA
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 20:00:14
Wow! i was in need of a meeting... looked on the web and here I am. My name is brian & i'm an alcoholic. This is a good topic for me... Kind of a wake up and count my blessings. I've only been sober for 4 months now but already the promises are coming true. FEAR & SELF PITY God how nice to start each day without them! I still remember the days I would promise myself I was not going to drink and the next thing I knew I was forking over my last 10 spot for a bottle. I remember staring into the mirror looking for the person I wanted / used to be... and hating the person staring back at me. But now through the grace of God and the the people in AA I can look in the mirror, I can go 24 hours w/o a drink... I still have a long way to go and a lot of work to do, but each sober day get's me closer to where i want to be. Oh well starting to ramble.... Thanks for listening (reading?) Keep the faith. This program works!
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota, fla
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 20:53:28
i am an alcoholic.....my name is richard.........thanks for the topic! the promises come true every day for me, i haven't had a drink today and thats a biggee in my life!!!!!!
Member: Annie D
Location: New Jersey
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 21:14:41
Hi I am Annie and an alcoholic. This is my first online meeting too. It's good, but I want to see your faces too. I have been blessed with 25 years one day at a time of sobriety through this program and its people. I truly feel the promises operate in my life. It amazes that I don't have financial insecurity - probably 'cause I am not smart enough to realize how scary my finances are. The fact is somehow God has always carried me my first sober day and I believe with His help and my putting one foot in front of the other doing the next right thing, He is going to stay with me. "I know instinctively" and don't "fear" because I have the habit of getting down on my knees when they are shaking and asking for guidance. I feel my fears are quieted by that. As long as I don't drink, and I keep going to meetings and working on myself and my sobriety, the promises are working for me. It feels good. The new people that I read in this meeting - I think the advice from Michael? I believe it was makes really good sense. If you put all your energy just today into not drinking and conncecting with AA, you can make it. Candy, and fruit juice and water all help - someone else advised. If you shake too much, go to a doctor, they can help get you past any life threatening palpitations and tremors. God be with you. And thanks to all of you for being here in my home right now. Annie
Member: John F.
Location: Marienville,Pa
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 21:19:21
my name is John and I'm an alcoholic.Since I've come this wonderful program, my life has changed so much.Today it's not always what's in the deal for me, but I ask that God would use me to help someone somewhere,and on the occasion that I listen ,my chances of being helpful are increased.Today I have an inner peace that I never had before.But I must remember that all good things in my life are not what I deserve, but are gifts of love from my Heavenly Father.Thanks for letting me share.
Member: mary t
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 21:42:44
Thank you michael M, Joan W,Robin L, and JB, Reading what you have to say helps very much I have tried meetings before with no luck , old smoking men and God is the most important force in my life. I have two small children and want to be in their life when thy are older. I am so afraid. Whatever happened to the promise I gave my children when they were born? How can I do this?,
Member: Annie D.
Location: New Jersey
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 21:57:20
Hi - just read your note Mary T. Just remember you have a disease; sometimes that means you do things to people you love that you would never do if you were really in charge. But you aren't, alcohol is. And also when you have a disease and find the how to put it in remission, it is best to do what you have to - even if the meetings have old smoking men in them, it is better than chemotherapy or other things people with other diseases have to do. Besides, I have found some of those old smoking men to be very gentle and wise and deeply spiritual. Gravitate to the women. They know exactly how you feel; they can help you to stop for minutes at a time - I know, it worked for me. And the love you get is real and unconditional. Please try it, and God will help you do the rest. You are worth it; you are not bad, you are just sick. Annie
Member: Lewis B.
Location: Saline Co. Mo
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 22:06:33
Hi. My name is Lewis and I'm an alcoholic. Most of the promises have come true in my sobriety. As someone said the fear of economic insecurity has left, not because I got a lot of money but because I quit worrying where the money was going to come from to pay the bills. I finally realized that all those years I worried like that and the bills always got paid even though I couldn"t figure it out. So I have learned to go on with working this program on a daily basis, talking to my higher power, and trying to help others to stay sober. Thanks for letting me share. Lewis
Member: mary t
Location:
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 23:01:47
BRIAN,YOU HAVE GONE FOUR MONTHS. HOW DID YOU YOU DO THAT. I AM A BEGINER. WHAT ARE THE PROMISES . I SPOKE WITH MANY NICE PEOPLE TODAY BUT I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND THINGS LIKE HP?? PLEASE HELP BEGINNERS .HOW ABOUT A BEGINNERS PLACE?
E
Member: Ron L.
Location: Aurora, MN
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 23:06:59
My name is Ron and I'm an alcoholic. The promises do come true! Don't try to force them they will come on thier own. They may take longer with one person, and or sooner with the next person. Just being sober today they are starting to come true. Read the Big Book, go to meetings and stay away from that fist drink. That don't mean to buy one throw it over your shoulder and drink the second one. It still is the first drink you have that will do it to you. It (A.A.) is a simple program, it's is numbered 1-12 for us, get involved in your group, even if it's emtying ashtrays, making coffee etc. these things need to be done and someone needs to do it. I still do them and I've been around awile. I'd like to welcome the newcomers to the program and to keep coming back!!! I need you to stay sober as much as you need me.
Member: John M.
Location: California
Date: 28 Feb 1999
Time: 23:36:37
Greetings Folks, my name is John and I'm an alcoholic and this is my first online meeting. What a gift to come to my computor this morning, full of frustration, and read just what I needed to hear. I,ve slacked off meetings lately and have been experiencing anxiety and self doubt as th result. Before sobering up by finding a merciful God, I had no understanding of the concept of gratitude or any of the spiritual principles. But somehow though the pain of alcoholism I aquired the spiritual key and since then I've had the ability to live a happy useful life. For my first couple of years sober I kept these principles primary and although I exoerienced some difficult times I was so excited about my new way of life I remained grateful to be a sober member of A.A. My situation today is I am becoming more and more distracted by family obligations and career combined with the feeling that the idea of drinking again being impossible. I think I,m attempting to live the AA way without AA and its not easy. Simply by reading your comments today I see at least one area I've gone off track and that is my lack of expressed gratitude. In AA I learned to do better things to feel better but on my own I often do not take the time to put the spiritual path first. Thank Yuo for being here. John
Member: Joan W
Location: Upstate NY
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 00:03:31
Hi Everyone;
I am a graateful recovering alcoholic and my name is Joan.
Sorry for double dipping ( I'm slowly catching on to this computer lingo).
Mary T., I am receiving your e-mails, but the first one came through Prodigy and the last aol. I wrote you on Prodigy and now will send through aol.
HP means Higher Power. I choose to call my Higher Power God. The promises are on pages 83 and 84 of the book Alcoholics Anonymous (called by many the Big Book). If you have this book they follow the words "if we are painstaking about this phase of our development....".
We have all promised our children and our parents and our spouses ... and we have all broken those promises over and over and over again, until we sought the solution to our alcoholism. For me that was through AA, going to lots of meetings, finding a sponsor and others to support and encourage me and working a program through the steps.
I will try to e-mail you again. Please keep contacting me. We new computer operators will figure this out yet.
Love and ((hugs)) to all. May God bless us, every one.
Love, Joan
Member: Bill S.
Location: St. Louis, MO
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 00:15:24
Hi everyone. Bill, alcoholic. Another great topic. To the newcomers, look at all the wonderful promises that have come to pass for the those above that have been working the steps. Look no further, the answer is in working the steps with a sponsor, going to meetings(and sharing at those meetings), reading the Big Book, helping others, and changing the people, places and things that make it more than likely you'll slip.
Like they told me when I was a newcomer, "It's an easy program...all you have to do is change everything about yourself!". After they chuckled a little they let me know that they were there to help me, a member approached me after the meeting and offered to be my temporary sponsor, got me a Big Book helped me walk my first, second and third steps...God Bless Don V.. I guess all I'm trying to say is what we always say at the end of our meetings,"Keep coming back, it works, if you work it." God bless.
Member: Jackie
Location:
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 00:30:09
HI my name is Jackie and I am a alcoholic today is day one without a drink and I too don't know what to do not to take that first drink. But, Brian I too hate looking at myself in the mirror . I don't know this person anymore.I'm glad to have found this site.
Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 00:59:58
ARCHIE C: I don't want to put up another lengthy post or distract from this week's topic by going into the "came to believe" topic. So please e-mail me at lem15@hotmail.com
By way of identification, I was a militant atheist when I came into AA and stayed that way for over 5 years. I now have a concept of a HP that works for me, but I don't refer to my HP as "God". Perhaps my experience can be of some help to you.
Member: Mrellan H
Location: Silverdale, WA
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 01:24:56
Hi my name is Mrellan and I am a REAL alcoholic/addict!! I would like to adress my comments to Mary T who is "celebrating" her first 24 hours. How do you do it, you ask. Mary you have already taken the first two most important steps. You didn't drink today and you reached out your hand and asked for help. Everyone who has ever attended an AA meeting has had to do that to stay sober.
I would strongly reccomend that you make connection with an AA group in your geographic area as soon as possible. Attend as many meetings as you can. 90 meetings in 90 days is a great way to start. The first meeting you go to tell the group that you are new and you are looking for a temporary sponsor.
The BB says, "Rarely have we seem a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path..." I was pretty leery the first day, and the second and the thrid, etc, etc. But I kept coming back and low and behold, I fould out it really was that simple. Don't drink and go to meetings. The rest will take care of itself. This is a simple program but is certainly is not easy--especially at the beginning!
If you have a Big Book read page 83 (last paragraph) and page 84 (first two paragraphs. These are the promises everybody is talking about. They really are not extragavant. The "secret" is in the line, "We will suddenly realize God is doing for us what we could not do for our selves." Not only can HP keep us sober, but he/she can show us a new life and a beautiful world beyond our wildest dreams. Oh, you don't have to believe in Him/Her, the important thing is to let go and He/She believes in you.
Good Luck and don't quit before the miracle happens!! Keep coming back, you are worth it!!
Love, Mrellan
Member: ken,d
Location: sitka,ak
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 02:08:59
hi,i'm Ken,alky from Alaska.first on-line meeting.like it!welcome new comers!don't worry about the promises yet.just stay away from the booze for now.we know it seems imposible right now,but you're on the right track.like somebody else said,call another member of AA most anybody should be willing to talk ,if not ask for more phone #'s thats how most of us started,thats why we are so willing to help!It's not easy ,but it can be done.Also about the mirrors, I used to have a big problem with them also.all of these things are (normal)for us drunks.but after time and work,these things can get easier.as for the promises,after staying sober about six months.i worked through the steps as sugested in the book of(a.a.)and freinds in meetings.the promises began to come true for me also,and i haven't had to drink or drug since!thanks for being here for me!
Member: Maggie K
Location: BC Canada
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 02:36:50
MaggieAA, Mary if you have a big book the promises start on the bottom of pg.83" If we are painstaking"and continues on pg.84. HP is not the sauce LOL It stands for Higher Power.It is best to go to f2f {face to face } meeting,but you are more than welcome here too. Keep coming back 'til the miracle happens Lovey. You can do this just don't pick up that first drink. In my own life when I look in the mirror I truly see a miracle looking back at me.The promises came true for me when I gave myself,surrendered to my God {HP} and knew that he would take care of my highest good if I did what I had to do. Don't drink,go to meetings, get a sponsor USE my sponsor ,read the Big Book[BB] and do the steps, and help other alcoholics.That's how it has worked for me Mary.Love Maggie Muggins muggins46@yahoo.com
Member: Bonnie C - 5/30/80
Location: Seattle
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 02:55:30
Hi extended family, bonnie/alcoholic here, (((ROOM-HUG))) welcome home to all the new people at this meeting, to all my other brothers and sisters here, thank you for loving me till I could love myself. as I will do for those just coming in. Oh dear hearts, those frightening, terrifying first few days of sobriety. we have all been there. what they told me was keep the plug in the jug and hug the rug (meaning dont go out to places where i used to drink or with friends that i used to drink with, until i get stronger) keep chocolate/candy, fruit juice, pop, (NO non alcoholic beer or wine for they contain .05% alcohol) you will still be practicing your disease, get to as many f2f (face to face - in person) meetings as you can. if you dont know where they are call the Alcoholics Anonymous number in your telephone book and they will talk with you and tell you where, ask them any questions and if you want they will send someone out to talk with you. remember these are all drunks just like you, no saints here. we've all screwed up but we dont have to drink at our problems anymore. when you get to this meeting (i went to sometimes 3 meetings a day) cause they told me to put half the energy into AA as i did my drinking for as long as i drank. i drank alot sometimes. anyway, they said get a big book and start reading it, get phone numbers and use them before i drank, when i felt like one, for i surely would and start taking suggestions from those folks who had some time in the program for they had been there and their lives were proof that this thing worked. I had run out of answers for my life and this thing didnt seem very cool, with all this talk about God and spirituality, but what the hell, what did i have to lose? my self respect, nope, my shame attacks told me i didnt have any of that. my kids, nope, they didnt respect or love me anymore for i wasnt lovable or respectable, my husband, nope, we didnt love each other anymore, we just shared this disease, my home overlooking the ocean, nope, if love dont live there, who wants it anyway, just a pretty prison? friends? nope, when was the last time i was real about anything with anyone? I spent most of my time lieing about who i was, i couldnt be a friend so how could i have one? what did i have to lose? NOTHING> what did i have to gain EVERYTHING - much to my surprize, my kids who were 8, 12 & 14 are now 27, 31 & 33, I'm 49 and am blessed with 3 wonderful kids that love and respect me today, 3 beautiful grandkids who are shared lovingly with me today, self worth that allows me to fit in anywhere, a fellowship that accepts me in any room I decide to enter and put my hand out, the ability to be a part of my own life instead of watching life pass me by fantacizing about what i was going to do and never doing it. a wonderful man that loves me and wants to marry me, not having to jump into it before we are both sure, like i used to, from fear. if it be God's will, nothing will come between us. the ability to go anywhere and realize my dreams. With Gods help, the world is my oyster, life is worth living, life is full of love and wonder, I'm like a little kid in a candy store most of the time. what i used to call *Shit* still happens, but now I'm not paralized with fear when it does, I'm energized with speculation of what wonderful thing God has in store for me. my big deals were between my ears and so are my blessings, stay sober and look for yours, they are there, we just have to learn to recognize them. its all in the way i look at life today thanks to this program. Dear God please bless all who venture here, love and hugs, bon -- bonzoc@webtv.net
Member: John F
Location: Seattle
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 04:47:36
My name is John F. I am an alcoholic. I have 25 days of sobriety. I have only been in the program for 1 month. I know I owe my life to AA. Just saw My name is Bill W. Video. Thank God for Bill and Louis (His wife) Without them I probably wouldn't be alive today. Thanks to all of you too.
Member: Tony C.
Location: Vancouver B.C.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 06:24:14
This is my first online meeting, and I must admit that I needed it. I have come to love the promises, they light my way towards gratitude. I can see how much the steps, my sponsor, meetings and the fellowship has contributed to a miracle that I had thought impossible, Change, I can honestly say that I have changed more in the last 2 years than I have in the 14 years between my teens and entering this program. Thank you.
Member: Lynn L
Location: Jackson, MS
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 07:04:00
My name is Lynn and this is all new to me--finding AA online. I am having trouble navigating to find where I am trying to go so when I leave this site I may not be able to find it again! But I do look forward to building sober strenth through this means.Lynn
Member: Jill M
Location: CA
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 10:14:54
I can't believe how easy it is to connect to AA when you need to. I am glad I found this discussion page. The promises have come true in my life without my even being aware of it. God has always taken care of me. The transformation I have experienced since I got sober 8 1/2 years ago still amazes me.
I am so grateful that I have not had to take a drink even during times when I did not think would make it and that is proof to me that there is a higher power. The miracle for me has been to watch how good life became for all the other people that stayed sober and that maybe it would for me too. And it has. The gifts I have received have been countless. They keep coming as long as I don't drink and go to meetings.
Member: Sharon B.
Location: Westfield, WI
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 10:50:47
My name is Sharon and I am an alcoholic. This topic is very interesting. The biggest promise I am made was to myself, never to take another drink! This in turn has had some of my of dreams come true for me. For one thing my oldest son no longer had to take care of his drinking mother, and was now able to move on with his life and get married. This was one of the most wonderful things that has happened to me since I have been sober. If I had been drinking I would have never seen this day. I have also returned to school to get an assoicate's degree in the paralegal field. I would have never dreamed when I was involved with alcohol that I would ever return to school, in a field I have been interested in since I was a teenager, (I am now in my 50's). My promise to my family is to stay sober, and I have no reason not to anymore thanks to AA, my family and supportive friends. Dreams can come true when your sober. Thanks for a chance to contribute to this site. Sharon B.
Member: YVETTE P
Location: TN
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 10:54:52
HI MY NAME IS YVETTE IM A ALCOHLIC I BEEN SOBER FOR 14 DAYS,GOING BACK TO MY MEETINGS,READING THE BB.THERE IS ALOT I DONT UNDERSTAND ABOUT THE BB BUT I TRY.I BEEN THROUGH THE PROGAM BEFORE I WAS SOBER FOR 8 MONTHS.MAN I BLEW IT.MY HUSBAND LEFT ME HURT ME SO BAD NO BODY CAN IMAGINE HOW IT HURTS.I LET THE BOTTLE CONTROL MY LIFE BUT NOT NO MORE.IM GOING TO MAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME.I WILL HAVE CONTROL THIS TIME,IM TIRED OF HURTING PEOPLE WHO REALLY LOVE ME. YVETTE P
Member: YVETTE P
Location: TN
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 10:55:11
HI MY NAME IS YVETTE IM A ALCOHLIC I BEEN SOBER FOR 14 DAYS,GOING BACK TO MY MEETINGS,READING THE BB.THERE IS ALOT I DONT UNDERSTAND ABOUT THE BB BUT I TRY.I BEEN THROUGH THE PROGAM BEFORE I WAS SOBER FOR 8 MONTHS.MAN I BLEW IT.MY HUSBAND LEFT ME HURT ME SO BAD NO BODY CAN IMAGINE HOW IT HURTS.I LET THE BOTTLE CONTROL MY LIFE BUT NOT NO MORE.IM GOING TO MAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME.I WILL HAVE CONTROL THIS TIME,IM TIRED OF HURTING PEOPLE WHO REALLY LOVE ME. YVETTE P
Member: YVETTE P
Location: TN
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 10:55:29
HI MY NAME IS YVETTE IM A ALCOHLIC I BEEN SOBER FOR 14 DAYS,GOING BACK TO MY MEETINGS,READING THE BB.THERE IS ALOT I DONT UNDERSTAND ABOUT THE BB BUT I TRY.I BEEN THROUGH THE PROGAM BEFORE I WAS SOBER FOR 8 MONTHS.MAN I BLEW IT.MY HUSBAND LEFT ME HURT ME SO BAD NO BODY CAN IMAGINE HOW IT HURTS.I LET THE BOTTLE CONTROL MY LIFE BUT NOT NO MORE.IM GOING TO MAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME.I WILL HAVE CONTROL THIS TIME,IM TIRED OF HURTING PEOPLE WHO REALLY LOVE ME. YVETTE P
Member: Jennifer W.
Location: Nevada
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 12:54:48
Hi, I'm Jennifer and I'm an alcoholic. In spite of myself the promises have come true. This only happened when I turned everything over to my HP. My life is unrecognizable to the drinker that I used to be. For all of the newcomers, just do what the sober people tell you to do and go to meetings and get a sponser and work the steps. Do not worry about anything else, just let God take care of it. Thanks for letting me share.
Member: Robin L.
Location: Phila.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 13:09:36
Mary T I hope that you are still hanging in there. I know that right now you are trying to understand it all. The best thing for you to do for yourself is to keep it simple. When I first got sober, I could not comprehend much of anything. All I did was listen to the other people share their experience, strength, and hope. Most of it I wasn't capable grasping. People said "Take what you need, and leave the rest" So I did. It wasn't much. I knew that there were other people who were able to describe how I was feeling. I no longer was alone. I had to find faith. Faith that if I kept watching and hearing how these people stayed clean and sober one day at a time that I could learn how to. I have 2 small children too. I thank god everyday that they never saw me high. Get yourself a sponsor. I called my sponsor every morning at 7:00AM. Together, we worked on starting the day out sober. Between my sponsor,meetings, and my blind faith in the program, I was able to get through those first days and weeks. I read the fist chapter in the AAStep Book over and over again until I was ready to absorb more. You are not alone. Let us help you as others have helped us. You will keep us sober. We need you in our lives. Robin L
Member: Jan T.
Location: Ct.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 15:34:20
Hi. I'm Jan grateful to be sober today. I remember well the first time that I was asked to read the Promises--I had not been out of treatment for very long, and was certainly not understanding how much better sobriety would make my life. I remember that I loved then and still do the idea that God was doing for me what I could not do for myself. I had really despaired of getting/staying sober. I half-hoped that I was constitutionally incapable--so I knew that every MINUTE that I was sober was a gift--I had failed so many times before. That "partnership" continues to work for me today as I take such comfort in knowing that I will never have to be alone again--and I was so very lonely. Thanks for letting me share. Jan
Member: George R.
Location: Granite, MD
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 15:47:21
Hello all. My name is George R. and I am alcoholic. To all who are new to the program and question how it works, I have found that it works just fine if you WORK it. Once you have made up your mind that you are like us and suffer from the same illness that we do (Alcoholism), read the first several pages of Chapter 5 in the BB (the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous). There you will find the steps that we who have been sober for a while all had to take. I know, when you first read those steps, you to will say "What an order, I can't go through with it!" But you can - we did and we were just a bunch of drunks! But we had the help of a lot of other sober drunks that we found in the rooms of AA at F2F (face to face) meetings. That's not to say that these cyber meetings are not a help, but they are not what the newcomer really needs if he or she really has a sincere desire to stop drinking. After working the first nine steps to the best of my ability, I realized that the steps were starting to come true in my life. In fact, I realized that they had been coming true in some ways since I started with the first step. Admitting that I was powerless over alcohol gave me a new freedom from the fear and the guilt that had been a part of my life for so long! And my days started to become happier from that moment as I realized that people who had been drunks just like me had recovered from that seemingly hopeless state of mind and body that chronic drunks suffer from! But I found that in order to receive the benefits promised in the Big Book (AA members's fond nickname for the publication titled "Alcoholics Anonymous"), just like the BB tells me, I have to WORK for them! Now with a few thousand days of comfortable sobriety, I can swear to any one who will listen that this program does work and, YES, all of the promises have come true in my life. I cannot express in words my gratitude for this program and the people in it. And I am sure that my HP (for any newbies ouy there, that's "Higher Power" which some prefer to call God or Creator or even Great Spirit, but you get to choose the name you are most comfortable with!), had something to do with putting the program and the people here for me. I don't know yet why I am one of those fortunate enough to have been chosen, but I have come to believe that there IS a reason. So, if you are new to the program and want what we have, come join us as we walk in the light, free from the bondage of alcoholic addiction. There are many here who will help you for we know from our own experience that we can do together what we could never do alone. The promises are yours for the taking, IF you are willing to work for them. The Great Fact is that great events have come to pass for us and can for you also. And may you be blessed by that HP who has guided us all this far. LOVE.
Member: Vicki S.
Location: Delray Beach, FL
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 17:20:27
The Promises are read at the end of most meetings I go to around here. I must've heard them hundreds of times before I heard the line "if we work for them." The Promises have come true since I got that part of it.
Member: Geri W
Location: Va.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 17:30:05
Geri, a very grateful alcohlic here. It is because of rooms like this and people like you that I am sober today. Thank you. A few words to those who are in pain right now. I din't start this topic to lure the "newbie" to AA, but to get to hear how my brothers and sisters in the program were doing on our mutual trek through life. Sounds like it's working for most of us. I know that it is for me. For those just coming into the rooms of AA - Jackie, you said " I am an alcoholic" . What a major start. Find the number, call AA, ask to speak to a woman and then hang on - she will lead you through, cause she's been there too. Archie, contact Larry. He's got alot of good sobriety and will help. Mary T. Can't help but wonder where you drank.. All the bars I went to were filled with smoke. Now AA has non smoking meetings for those who are bothered by it. Try one. Yvette, 14 days is wonderful. I am concerned that you think you have to "control" it. Get in touch with a female AA and talk about who controls our sobriety. Enough! It's just that if I were in one of the famous f2f meetings, I would say those things to you if I could. Thanks for all the great responses to our topic. Think I'll try another 24. Hugs
Member: Val P.
Location: Toronto, Canada
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 17:36:42
Val, here, from the great white north, Canada. Surfing the net, I somehow ended up on this site. I too am a alcoholic and had been stummbling along in and out of AA. Working long and odd hours keeps me away from most meetings, so for a bit of positive reinforcement I read the big book and to keep the craveings at bay I take a drug called "Revia". With the help of this drug, I haven't had a drink in about three months, but to stay that way, I have to take the drug for the rest of my life. Now that I know that I can attend this meeting on the net, maybe I can get away from the drug and do it on my own, with AA's help, of course.
My biggest stummbling block of grasping the twelve steps is found in the third step, "Made a decision to turn our will and lives over to the care of GOD as we understood him." I never believed in GOD and have little or no understanding of him or it. I guess I'm starting to ramble so I guess I'll sign off and wish you all another sober day. P.S. I'll be back
Member: sharon b
Location: OH
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 18:10:36
I really enjoy the comments I hear on this cyber discussion meeting, from many different people, but I wonder why some comment over and over? Wouldn't a chat room be a more appropriate place for that? Thank-you especially neal m, and vicki s. I needed to hear your comments today.
Member: Terry E
Location: VA
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 18:47:06
I'm Terry and an alcoholic. Hi to all. I am 7 days sober and have been to f2f mtgs on several occasions. I am on my second attempt of staying sober. I have never really studied or even comprehended the promises until now.Great topic.It could very well be a big part I missed the first time.
Member: John L.
Location: Jackson, Michigan
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 19:24:45
Hi all. My name id John and I am an alcoholic. All of the promises just came totally true for one of my sponsors this past Thursday. You see, Roland, one of my sposors, sober for nearly 30 years went to be with his HP. He taught me a lot about patience, tolerance, acceptance, and most importantly love. As much as I miss listening to the knowledge he gave me, I know he died sober, happy, and old. I know we all have a new guardian angel watching over us. I wish I would have made the time to sit with him and go through his original red cover BB. Thank you Roland for what you were willing to teach to all in the Jackson, Michigan area. I'm still working for the promises the BB and all of you say will come true. I've recently completed a forth and have set a date with another sponsor to complete a fifth in the next couple of weeks. By the grace of God at one day at a time, I'll be able to achieve these promises, such as my gardian angel, Roland. Thank you all for letting me participate in my first online meeting. I'm interested in finding a male email sponsor with 20 yrs or better in continuous sobriety. If interested, Please write back to me at dogdecoy@juno.com. Thanks again. John
Member: Sandra S
Location: Vista CA
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 19:26:05
Hi
I have a brother in law that I want to help.
He has reached out to my husband (his brother) and I and we are ready to support him , he needs alot of help that neither of us are trained in. I called a friend who has been sober for 5 years and she subggested contacting AA. I am looking for any suggestions that would help us get to a meeting.
Heres a very brief description of him. He basically "survives each day" Does not have a car, steady job or much more than the clothes on his back. He has a 2 kids 9,12, and they stay with their mother, yes married but they are not together. She is a drug addict and he is too, but also drinks whiskey, gulps it really. He tried in December to get off the meth, on his own, but got on the booze instead. Anyway, about 1 month ago he fell off the wagon, and my husband and I searched for him and found him.
Speed up to 2 weeks ago, he called me and said that he was getting close to doing drugs again and could I please pick him up. So I did, we stayed up late talking and he spent the night I took him to the train station the next morning and he is now with his parents (he is 36) sleeping on the floor of a 1 bedroom apt. (theirs) and looking for work.
This Fri they are all coming over my house and his brother is going to stay with us for 2 weeks.
My husband and I have some projects that he can work on for the two week period. (then mom and dad are coming back to pick him up.)
WE think that he needs to learn some life skills, and in addition to learning how not to do drugs and alcohol. Also, he wants to be close to his children geographically. With out writing a novel, I hope some one out there can read between the lines and have some suggestions for us.
We are willing to go to a meeting for support, my husband and I and we are going to talk to mom and dad, mom will not be a problem, dad will be.
I am going to call AA tonight at the local chapter but I thought one of you may have some ideas.
Thanks for your time. sorry for being so lenghty.
Member: sandra s
Location: vista ca
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 19:39:20
Sandra here, I'm sorry I shouldn't have used this one.
I guess I should have used coffee pot.
Thanks for your time and to all of you keep up the good work.!
Member: James L
Location: NE Wa.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 20:00:50
James alcoholic just wanted to say to val that the third step does not say we have found God it says we made a decision to be followed by action in the folling steps we proceed to turn our life over to him which to me is my thoughts and actions thanks James
Member: James L
Location: NE Wa.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 20:05:16
James alcoholic just wanted to say to val that the third step does not say we have found God it says we made a decision to be followed by action in the folling steps we proceed to turn our life over to him which to me is my thoughts and actions thanks James
Member: Dennis B
Location: London Ont. Ca.
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 20:52:27
Hi my name is Dennis and I am an alcoholic To Val P when I came to AA I had trouble with the word GOD.The friends I met at the meetings sugested that I use Good Orderly Direction until I found the God of my understanding
Member: Pam H
Location: SW WA
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 21:05:30
Hithere. I'm Pam Alcoholic/addict. The promiuses are a good topic. the longer that I am in recovery, working the steps, going to meeting, talking to my sponsorand working with otrhere others I notice the promises working more and more in my life. When I was first in recovery in 1990 I was always sitting in meeting every day and I had my crochet hokk in hand and my yarn was crocheting waay not paying much attention to waht was being said. One day I read and listened to the promises anfd I shared that I felt them coming true in my life. This one lady in the meeting masde comment on it. She had stated that they don't statr coming true until in the middle of the 9th step. Needless to say I thought that she was full of it. Guess what? I ended up going back out. Today I have over 6 years of sobriety and have woirked the steps and I do see the promises coming true in my life. And i tell you sometimes it has been hard. In my first 5 years excuse me 3 years of sobriety I lost 2 brothers 1 very close Aunt my dad then my stepmother and my stepdad. By the grace of God I made it throiugh it clean and sober. Thankyou God. Today I don't worry to much on my financial part but of course I know that I have to do the footwork. I own my own home and that is a total shock. That is the promices today So much good has come to me I guess I could say more good than bad. I am very greatful to be in this program. Thanks for leeting me share. Keep coming back.
Member: Hollywood
Location: Cambridge Idaho
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 21:17:31
Im Hollywood and I am an aloholic. The promises have made themselves present in my life also.At first they were very noticable. Sometimes they are very suttle. But they are there. I pray every day for another 24hrs and I seem to get it. I try to work my steps go to my mtg and carry the message to the alcoholic who still suffers. But I belive we must keep in mind the promises we made to the program, that we would go to any lenght'. We also made a promise to carry the message to the alcohlic who still suffer's. It's been said at mtg's that you have to give away what you have in order to keep what you have. And this makes since if you think about. Thanks for sharing with everyone and may god let you have his will for another 24hr's.
Member: Annie D.
Location: New Jersey
Date: 01 Mar 1999
Time: 22:43:15
Hi,I am Annie, an alcoholic. Sandra S.I feel your pain, I had it with my daughter. After you find the AA meetings, you can attend open ones with your brother, find out where you and your husband can go to Al Anon. They will help you do what is right for yourself and your brother. God be with you. this is a terribles disease.
Member: Wil W
Location: Alaska
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 00:26:44
Hello my name is Wil W, I really appreciate the fact that I can "talk" when there is not a meeting which is close. I have been tempted this past week but I have been able to stay strong. God bless and thank for your site.
Member: Amy GC
Location: Switzerland
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 02:43:32
Hey friends my name is Amy and I am an alcoholic. I prayed to my hp about the safety of my goings out and my returns home over the past week as I was in a dangerous spot on Earth this past week (alps). But as to how the promises have been fulfilled in my life personally since I have worked the steps (and will continue to ODAAT), here goes...
Although detox was not a breeze for me (did it in a center with medication, even after 12 day treatment, 3 day outpatient and full intro to and connections in AA I still raved the drink sometimes more than others from the day I decided to "try to stop" until I finally could 2 months of occasional returns to the insanity threw me back down so I could look up!
After accepting grace and asking my hp for help it came abundantly. Not immediately, but with dilligence to make a commitment not to drink today and reminding myself of the reasons why if in situations where the crave returns.
Over the past week I was in several situations where drinking was around me and even a best friend of 14 years and her hubby had a few in front of us but I didn't even sulk, THAT is a promise fulfillment that has come, thanks for letting me share, Amy
Member: Mary N.
Location: Maple Valley, WA
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 04:09:30
My name is Mary, alcoholic, the promises do come true if you are willing to work for them!! I would be dead if not for AA. Slowly in the last 15 months my life has become a real life. I can handle things without drinking. My husband (also in the program) got out the Navy and we started over, he has a great job now and I stay home with our 3 kids. We couldn't have done this if we were still drinking. Economic secruity, we have it, we haven't bounced a check in 15 months, no more unpaid bills, we don't have a savings YET, but it's coming. Most of all, thru the people I met in AA I came to know love. The people in AA loved me unconditionally, I never felt secure or accepted until I walked into the rooms of AA. I felt like I was finally home!
For those trying to find out about AA try this: www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/ It is the AA web sit and has a lot of info to help you understand better. It also lists the promises and steps. Thanks for letting me share!
Member: john k
Location: upstate new york
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 07:46:44
Member: Marv B.
Location: Texas
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 07:47:38
Not among the written promises, but verbally, when I came to AA, my sponsor said, "Stick around here, you'll see miracles happen.:" Today, some of my AA friends who saw me back then tell me that if they would have ever taken bets on anyone who could not make this program, it would have been me. But, I recall after some time of vibrating through regular attendance of AA in my home state of Minnesota, I one day said to my sponsor, "You know, I recall what you said about sticking around here and I'd see miracles happen.....well I'm seeing them as I watch these people.: He placed his hand on my shoulder and said, "You"re one of them!" I'm grateful to AA and my Higher Power to have become one of all of you ... a MIRACLE,.
Member: john k
Location: upstate new york
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 07:50:55
hi my name is john k and i am an alcoholic. I really enjoy the social life and i find it hard not to drink. i have been sober since late august 98 and i just try to do my best. i have been told my problem is not with drinking but with anger so hopefully i can learn more here. thank you for listening
Member: Robin L
Location:
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 09:50:54
To Sandra S Contact Alanon This is for you and your family If he really wants help and is ready to go to any and all lengths to get clean and sober,There is much help out there for him. He may need to go to a detox facility. There are rehabs (in patient and out patient) along with the support of AA meetings. He has to make the move. Robin L
Member: Robert B.
Location: Boise Idaho
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 11:13:58
Hi. My name is Robert and I am an alcoholic.
I have always related well to the many promises that the Big Book has to offer, not limited to the ones on pages eighty something. Welcome to Mary T. and to many others psoting here as new to sobriety. When I was new the promise that I could here, and hope for is in fact a chapter title: There Is A Solution. Yes the promises have come true in my life. As I proceeded through the steps many things began to happen, and my awareness and ability to recognize wellness began to grow. The spirit grew in my life and the doom and gloom was being dispelled.
If you are new--If you have a big book--Go to the last chapter, A Vision For You, and read the first several paragraphs closely. That is how it felt for me. If that is how it felt for you--there is a solution--and that's a promise.
Hi Amy. Long time no hear. Glad you survived the avalanches. I thought of you when I heard the news.
Peace
Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 11:29:00
Val:
Never believed in God either. Was a sober atheist for over 5 yrs using AA as my HP. Have since "promoted" myself to agnostic. Have a broader concept of an HP that works for me. If you'd like to discuss, I'm at lem15@hotmail.com
Member: Bill R
Location: Seattle
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 12:03:44
Hello,my name is Bill,and I am still an alcoholic. I have been clean and sober now 9 months. About all I can say is that the promises do come true.Thanx
Member: RobinL
Location:
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 12:34:04
Hi My name is Robin. Iam an alcoholic and a drug addict. Ijust wanted to say that it makes me sad that Mary T has not been online. I hope she is alright. Robin L
Member: Deanna E.
Location: Texas
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 12:36:26
Mary T. -
I am a newcomer too. 23 days sober. YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE MEETINGS.
You have to listen to everyone here even if what they say is not what you want to hear.
23 days sober and God has already fulfilled a promise to me. Each 24 hours I don't drink I get 24 more that I don't drink.
If you need support between meetings you can come here, but please please go to the meetings.
Everyone have a good day and don't drink.
Deanna
Member: JOHN A.
Location: WISCONSIN
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 13:03:02
HELLO. I'M JOHN AN ALCOHOLIC.
ANYBODY OUT THERE IN BAVARIA, GERMANY?
I HAVE JUST CELEBRATED MY FIRST YEAR IN RECOVERY, AND AM SO VERY GRATEFUL FOR THE PAIN AND JOY FROM WHICH I''VE BEEN ABLE TO GROW IN RECOVERY. I CATCH MYSELF THINKING THAT "IT CAN'T GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS...AND THEN IT DOES." THE PROMISES ARE REAL AND BEGIN TO ACCRUE THROUGH AN EVER-INCREASING PERSONAL RESPECT AND GROWTH IN DIGNITY. AND I COULD HAVE ACCOMPLISHED THIS??? NOT POSSIBLE! TOGETHER WITH MY HIGHER POWER, AND ALL OF "US" TOGETHER......THAT'S HOW IT WORK.......AND FOR ME. I AM SO VERY GRATEFUL TO AND FOR ALL OF US.
MY WIFE AND I WILL BE VISITING BAVARIA, GERMANY THIS SUMMER. THIS IS NOT A EUROPEAN TOUR, RATHER JUST "GOING HOME", AS I AM FIRST GERERATION HERE. DOES ANYONE HAVE AN IDEA OF WHEN AND WHERE I MIGHT FIND MEETINGS IN THE REGENSBURG, NURNBERG, STRAUBING, MUNICH, OR SALZBURG(AUSTRIA) AREAS? YOUR HELP WOULD BE GRATEFULLY APPRECIATED. DO YOU HAVE ANY email AA GROUP INFORMATION ADDRESSES IN GERMANY? ALSO, ANY IRELAND ADDRESSES?
THANKS FOR YOUR HELP! JOHN
Member: KERRY F.
Location: DELAWARE
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 14:14:49
"WE WILL BE AMAZED BEFORE WE ARE EVEN HALF WAY THROUGH"
Member: Joe S.
Location: Virginia
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 15:09:56
I have heard it said that, "Those who look for the Promises most are those who never kept one. Be aware that you can stay dry for many years without ever being sober. Sobriety is a spiritual way of life in A.A. not merely being "dry." Beware of those who profess to be sober, yet, claim to be agnostics. Read the story of Alcoholic Number Three, where Bill W. says to Henrietta, the wife of the third member, "The Lord has been so wonderful to me, curing me of this terrible disease, that I just want to keep talking about it and telling people." Dr.Bob, in the last paragraph of his story in the Big Book, says, "If you think you are an atheist, an agnostic, a skeptic, or have any other form of intellectual pride which keeps you from accepting what is in this book, I feel sorry for you."
Member: Chris H.
Location: Colorado
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 16:12:05
Chris here, and alcoholic.
I've read everyone's postings, so far, and am glad for this topic. I liked what Barry M. said about the promises, " It takes work on my part," and there is a reason they are called the 9th Step promises. I believe this program provides wonderful miracles, and after the first three steps requiring HONESTY, OPEN MINDEDNESS, AND WILLINGNESS, the rest of the steps just require ACTION. Doing steps gets results. Also, Chapter 5 of the BB lets me know that to get real results requires real honesty, and this is sometimes difficult to face, but all so true.
I have experienced much agony and loss lately, but, the serenity prayer has helped me move ahead with my life. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (other people) the courage to change the things I can (myself "with help"), and the wisdom to know the difference."
I like what Larry M. said, "If I get out of my own way and let go, especially when I'm dealing with a particularly difficult problem, the right answer always seems to come to me"....and, "When I was drinking and later when I was a dry drunk, my "actions" usually consisted of worrying, blaming others, and feeling sorry for myself."
Chuck R., I really liked what you said, "I try to remember that what I am saying may be meaningful to someone else at a moment that only gods can create. So I better be telling the truth." This reminds me of the following quote, "Doing the right thing for the wrong reason is committing a sin of the highest treason." I interpret this to mean that we cannot afford to be frauds in this program, we must be truly honest with ourselves, and "tell it like it is," because if we don't, we betray our selves and we betray others. Sure, when we first get here we may be somewhat skeptical, dishonest, insincere, and insecure. I have heard people say, "fake it till you make it," but eventually sobriety requires really wanting, and really doing the program.
Steve D. I appreciate what you said, "This helped me realize that the promises, like the steps, are not an event but rather a process." The promises do come in time, some sooner and some later, but all on God's clock.
Thanks Annie D. for reminding me, "I know instinctively" and don't "fear" because I have the habit of getting down on my knees when they are shaking and asking for guidance." Yep, when all else fails.
Thanks Bonnie C., as usual you have so many remarkable things to say, like, " I spent most of my time lieing about who i was, i couldn't be a friend so how could i have one?" Extreme self centeredness made it so that I could not enjoy the friendship of others, nor could I even stand being in my own skin. Thankfully, today, that is not true. I also really like what Maggie K. said, "In my own life when I look in the mirror I truly see a miracle looking back at me. The promises came true for me when I gave myself, surrendered to my God." Yep, when I was drinking I'd look into the mirror and see a sick, distorted, and unhappy image, today I love the person in the reflection. What a blessing.
Cheers John L. for reminding me "... about patience, tolerance, acceptance, and most importantly love." This program has given me the opportunity to experience these, as well.
SIDE BAR Val P., you mentioned that taking "Revia" temporarily removed your craving. That's a good start. While I am not from Canada, I spent a number of years there. I often expect society to provide me with answers. If only doctors invented the magic pill for alcoholism.. I realize many people have faith that society can provide a solution to health care problems. However, I know alcoholism is also a spiritual disease, and requires I find some sort of a personal connection with a power greater then myself. When I first got into the program I made my home group my higher power for awhile, because I figured they knew a few things I didn't. Later, I found a concept of a higher power or God that worked better for me. This has changed for me a few times as my understanding has grown in sobriety. Best Wishes to all!!!
Member: amanda w
Location: texas
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 16:31:10
I am new in recovery. I will have six months on the 12th. I really need some help and am having a hard time finding some. if you can help me, please email me at queenme38@hotmail.com. I would really apprecieate it.
Member: Dan F.
Location: Wausau, WI
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 17:05:45
It's not one of the promises, but it could be "The will of God for us is always something joyous and interesting and vital, and much better than anything we could think of for ourselves." Emmet Fox The Sermon on the mount
Member: Paul V.
Location: Slidell, La.
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 17:46:50
Hi ya'll. My name is Paul and I'm an alcoholic. We just had a meeting at my home group about the promises. All during the meeting I kept thinking that none of the promises had become true for me, but as I listened to people share how they were coming true in their lives I began to realize that I was changing my mind. The fact that I haven't had a drink for 5 months, and that I have the fellowship of this program is a great place to start.
I'm glad to find this group and I will enjoy all your comments.
Thanks for letting me share, Paul V.
Member: Christina K
Location: Oregon
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 18:04:14
Hello I understand the miracles of AA because I have expercienced them in my life. I am forever gravetful too AA for saving my life and I thank my HP! But, I have a serious problem I am unable to handle. My husband has relapsed after 9 yrs and for that I am struggling. It is hard to let go and let him and his god handle it. We are still together and he is asking for help... I am unsure of how to help. What do you do if he wants help but wont take those steps to get help. (not even a meeting) How do I not get dragged down with him?
Member: Aaron
Location: Kansas
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 19:02:01
Hi I am an alcoholic and my name is Aaron to all the Mary T's and the rest of the newcomers all we have is today I am still one drink away from my next drunk. I have a few 24 hrs strung together grab ahold of a group and call it home hang a coffee cup grab ahold and dont let go. The promises come stick around and dont quit 5 minutes before the miracle happens! This helped me early on G.O.D ( group of drunks, good orderly direction, good old dude) Get a sponsor, read the book, dont drink and go to meetings. We all trudge this happy road to destiny and We all stay sober one day at a time.
Member: tyrel m
Location: norway
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 20:08:43
i'm tyrel an i'm an alcoholic/addict- the promises- so far in my sobriety the promises have been fufilling themselves, if i work the program. i am 18 years old and i have been i the program for around 14 1/2 months now- i only get the oppertunity to be able to hit 3 meeting a week here in english, so my sponser told me to check this out. today the promises werent fufilled because i wasn't working my program and i almost slipped. my ego has been telling me how good i am doing and tonight my parents left town so i had some people over. a few of the brought drugs with them and we ended up comparing war stories and my ego wouldn't let me fall to say i could exceed what they were saying. so to prove them wrong i showed them how i used to roll a joint in egypt, and for the first time in 15 months i touched the stuff that scares me even think about. when i touched the stuff my hands started shaking and i had to take one guy home and after i dropped him off i stoped the car and prayed and then called my sponser. i wasn't jonesing for the drugs but my ego and the diease snuck up on me and said to "prove them wrong", atleast i didn't slip, but i need a good kick-start again. i would appreciate it very much if anyone who has had any simalar 'almosts' to respond with their way of getting back and moving foward. email- tmosness@hotmail.com- thanks for being there and letting me share- please write with any suggestions- thanks tyrel m
Member: CynthiaS
Location: Ca
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 21:02:25
Hi, My name is Cynthia and I am an alcoholic. I have been sober for a matter of hours now but am in desperate need of help. I am only 27 yrs old and already am suffering the physical affects of alcoholism. I have pancreatitus and I get sober and then when I feel all better, I go out and drink myself back into this condition. I have read the Big Blue Book and just am trying to get up enough nerve to walk into a meeting. I made it to the door and when the gentleman opened the door and asked me if I needed help. I wanted to scream "Yes" and get help, but all I could do what to start crying and I turned and ran. Any advise would be appreciated. Thank you. Cynthia S. CA
Member: Wayne R.
Location: San Diego CA
Date: 02 Mar 1999
Time: 23:15:55
My name's Wayne and I'm an alcoholic from San Diego, CA. First time on the net for a meeting! Have 9 and a half years sobriety...That's a miracle all by itself! Now have one year of sobriety for every DUI. This progam saved my life and possibly a whole lot of innocent normies. I am very active in AA 1 or 2 meetings a day and lots of duties (service work) at the Alano Club (Lemon Grove)...a word to the newcomer and the still suffering...find a God of your understanding...any God will do...ask that God as sincerely as you can to relieve you of the obsession to drink...he has done this for c o u n t l e s s others who were no better ] or worse than you! Believe this...there is hope for you!!! Really!!! Attend meetings...stick out your hand the people in the meetings want to help you...just let them know that "you" want their help! You never have to be the way you were yesterday or today again! You can start your new life "Right Now" You have NOTHING to lose but your pain and misery...Think...God DID NOT create you to be a stumbling, puking drunk...He has a better plan for you...that's a promise!
God Loves You & So Do I! Wayne R. ( newlifeenterprise@home.com )
Member: Bonnie E.
Location: Centralia Wash.
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 00:47:12
Hi everyone, I am Bonnie and am an alcholic. Some of the steps have been hard for me but I just keep going and go back to the ones I have a hard time with. So far the promises have been right on even though I have been having a bear of a time with the my sig. other for the last year. It has been very hard and getting harder beings I wont play into the co-dependant part. My higher power helps me each and every day or I would be right back where I started. Makeing an excuse to start again is easy. The hard part is saying no. All you new people stay with your support groups, meetings and a good sponsor. But most of all pray and have faith. Easy does it and you are never alone.
Member: Rachael M.
Location: Napa, Ca.
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 02:23:33
Hi! I'm Rachael and I'm an alcoholic. I really just need to unload a few things, but I will stick to the topic. The promises are definitely coming true in my life. They are definately not absolute though. Well...maybe my practice of the program isn't absolute. I still have mood swings. I'm having a bit of a depression right now. I could go on and on about that. You know how we alcoholics can be. I'm not sure what is going on but I need to step up my level of honesty. Do another fifth step. I have 18 mths of sobriety. things are better than they ever have been but there are things that need to change. Thank-you for listening. i know that we're not supposed to post our e-mail addresses but I feel compelled to post mine. I need some real help from somebody with more time than I have. thank-you for listening. rach999@hotmail.com
Member: Kevin K.
Location: Rochester,Washington
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 02:38:41
Hi I am Kevin an alcoholic and that was my mom Bonnie speaking! She is very inspireing to me I have quite and went sober for over 5 mos.now I love you Mom! I have recieved a great promise from this to get a new start, and have a life to remember for me and my children.
Member: Kevin K.
Location: Rochester,Wa.
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 02:46:18
Pray and Keep the Faith all of us and He will make it happen!
Member: Geri W
Location: Va
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 04:56:29
Geri, a very grateful alcoholic here. Cynthia, please call the AA number in your area and ask them to have a female member call you. Tell her you need help - someone to come and take you to the meeting. I wish I was in your town, I'd come get you - I know someone there will be glad to serve. Rachel, we'll get in touch privately to provide our expereience and hope. Everyone else - have a great 24.
Member: Robin L
Location: Phila.
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 07:48:09
My name is Robin. I am an alcoholic and a drug addict. Cynthia, I agree with what Geri W said. Call AA Let another woman come and get you. It might be easier to face the meeting with another woman by your side. Once you get into the room you will be fine. That first step is the hardest. Everyone in the rooms had to take the first step too. We were all scared too. You will find the strength you need in the rooms.Thanks for letting me share. Robin L.
Member: Teri F.
Location: Nashville, TN
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 08:24:27
Hi, Teri here. Alkie. It took me awhile to learn that the promises were an inside job, it didn't mean EXTERNAL circumstances were going to change for my behalf, it meant my actions, attitude and behavior would change enough to where I wouldn't FEEL the pain so much of life on life's terms. Just because I am in AA and sober doesn't mean life is going to take it easy on me, or that God was now Santa Claus. I began several years ago thinking "Well, if Teri's a good girl, stays sober and works the steps God will bring me all these wonderful "things" in my life. Ain't so. I didn't get my new "bike" for Christmas just for being a good girl. What I did get were things much deeper that cannot be taken away. My perception of life, my behavior toward others, THESE things have brought me peace and happiness, not the perfect job or relationship. Now, when times do get tough, there are people who genuinely love me that are willing to help. Can't say that for when I was drinking. FEAR of economic insecurity doesn't mean God's going to bless me with winning Publisher's Clearing House, or even a job when I THINK I DESPERATELY NEED IT. The fear leaves when I know the next necessary thing in my life will be fulfilled, somehow, someway. And most definitely not as quickly or in the way I would like. There's alot of surrenduring in this program, and I've fought it tooth and nail the whole way. But as the sober years pass, I learn, I let go, and I get just a little more peace today. Today I really surrender that HP does know what I REALLY need in my life, not I. So I follow suggestions, keep a positive faith, and not pick up a drink. . . Just one more day. I heard a funny analogy of this at a meeting, when a guy likened our willfullness to the show "Let's Make a Deal" I always want "What's behind the curtain" because it SEEMS or LOOKS like it would make me happier, while HP is often whispering in my ear, "Believe me kid, you want whats in the box!" Peace to all fellow trudgers!
Member: r j
Location: so cal
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 13:08:34
this cyber meeting stuff is very alarming to me, i have been sober for 8 years ,and what i have learned i learned sitting in a room full of alcoholics. a room where i can see the face of each and every person, "its called fellowship" Isolation is a bad thing for us and you should know this. so go to a real meeting and quit hiding.
serene in california
Member: r j
Location: so cal
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 13:10:06
this cyber meeting stuff is very alarming to me, i have been sober for 8 years ,and what i have learned i learned sitting in a room full of alcoholics. a room where i can see the face of each and every person, "its called fellowship" Isolation is a bad thing for us and you should know this. so go to a real meeting and quit hiding.
serene in california
Member: Eddie O.
Location:
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 14:54:54
Wayne, an Alcoholic. I tend to agree with rj. The cyber stuff is okay if it is but a supplement to attendance at regular meetings. The most dangerous place in the world in the inside of an alcoholic's mind. Chat Rooms are okay, but people also need meetings, a sponsor, a real-life place to serve others, and some general answerability to a group.
Anybody here who actually found sobriety at this site, please comment.
Member: William R
Location: San Antonio
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 16:23:52
Hello! I'm William R. and I am without a doubt an alcoholic. So many promises have come true for me in the short 7 1/2 months I have been sober that I can't imagine how wonderful the coming days and months and years might (hopefully) be. Like Cynthia S, I had pancreatitis. But, unlike her, I came very, very close to dying 4th of July weekend. What a nice holiday memory to leave my parents, brothers, large extended family and many close and dear friends here and in Austin and San Marcos. I was given 2mg of Valium every 15 minutes for nearly a day to keep me from going into seizures and shutting off my body's electrical circuitry. And yes, the physical shock sent me into alcohol withdrawal delirium (the old DTs). At any rate, with a great home group, I have done and seen so very much. I pray to my HP and I meditate on my past in a calm way. The only important thing in my life is sobriety, becuse the rest will all disappear without it anyway. Cynthia, you are playing with a hugh brush fire. Swollow your tears and walk into an AA meeting NOW and keep going. The beginning is scary for many, many of us, but the rest is bliss. I feel better just driving there. Aaron, I loved your quote "...don't quit 5 minutes before the miracle happens." Bonnie E and Kevin K, the mom and son team, what a great and inspiring story, reaching across the years to help each other. rj, that's pretty judgemental thinking. Some people can't go to as many meetings as they'd like. I myself chair a Monday night meeting and that's about the only one I've gone to in three weeks due to working 2 jobs and doing other volunteer work. I do hang with other friends in the program though, and that helps a lot. Also, my own best friend found that AA was not for him...he's not as ready for the f2f, and if something like this keeps him sober, that's fine with me and frankly, not really my business. Encouragement and hugs to all...we CAN do it by doing what our HP has shown us. i will have a personal email address soon. Until then...WR
Member: Karen L
Location: Salem, OR
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 16:39:03
My name is Karen and I'm an alcoholic. The promises do indeed come to pass if we are willing to work for them. There have been so many changes for me in the last 7+ years. My God as I don't understand him has walked me thru death, divorce, bankruptcy, injuries and ilness. He has seen fit to keep me sober thru everything. I am ever so grateful to be sober and a useful member of society today. Life is not like I thought it would be... Most days it's better! As a newcomer, the one phrase I hung on to was WE WILL LOVE YOU UNTIL YOU CAN LOVE YOURSELF. They did and it is really something today that I love myself. Love to all fellow members.
Member: Jim G.
Location: Hagerstown,MD
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 16:40:51
I am an alcoholic, joining AA after experiencing personal, social, and material downfall, resulting from alcoholism, and realizing that I could not keep my own promise to stop drinking. I was completely licked. In AA I found a contented and useful life without drinking and without missing it.
The topic---"promises" that have come true since beginning my program of recovery---give me pause. I'll begin this way. At a meeting I attend, the PROMISES ar read in the following form:
THE PROMISES The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.
1. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. 2. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. 3. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. 4. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear 5. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. 6. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They will always materialize if we work for them.
AND our sanity will have returned.
7. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we'll recoil from it as from a hot flame. We'll react sanely and normally, We will find that this has happened automatically. 8. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It will just come 9. We will not be fighting liquor. We will not even have sworn off. Instead, The problem will not exist for us.
BUT Alcohol is a subtle foe.
10. We'll not be cured of alcoholism. What we'll really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. From the book Alcoholics Anonymous
You'll notice that this form promises that we'll be freed from liquor although not "cured" of alcoholism. This has certainly come true for me---so long as I do not take the FIRST DRINK. I don't drink and I don't miss it. Thank God!
The most I can say about the other promises is that I am making progress, sometimes great, sometimes slight. For instance, I no longer feel useless and seldom pity myself. I no longer fear people and going broke. I have found the freedom to do and want to do what I ought to do as it says in the big book. I still long for serenity and peace. but I've been blessed with a great gift---my daily prayer: "I wonder what surprise my higher power has for me today."
So, I'll keep coming back!
Member: Ed D.
Location: Mt. Prospect, IL
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 18:02:31
Greetings, Ed, Alcoholic.
The biggest promise coming true for me to day anyway, is intuitively knowing how to handle situations. After I got a handle on the 3 "S's"-- Smile, shutup and step back-- plus not trusting my first reaction to any given situation, God gave me more answers to life's challenges than I could ever imagine.
The others have come true too, but being a construction engineer, I am geared to doing it my way on the fly-- and, except in a hole with concrete and rebar, that method doesnt work very often.
Thank God for this program.
Member: John.L
Location: Delaware
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 19:40:09
Hi my name is John alkie/addict!!! the promises is a good topic,thanks for choosing it!
today i can honestly say some of the promises are coming true in my life today.granted i still have bad days!but there bare-able.
I have a roof over my head today,and i was able to get a new car.i have friends today,not just a bunch of acquintances,i have a second chance at life today which i never thought possible. We all have another day of recovery!!! i have found a new freedom in recovery that would never be possible had i continued drinking and using. MY FAMILY is letting me back in there life today,and opening there mind to my problem and relizing i have a disease that ineed help controling!cause i can't do it on my own.
but like i said in the begging.i have a chance today.and god willing if i stay sober,some day maybe all the promises will come true in my life .but i'm just gratefull for the few that have already.
and for the newcomers such as my self!!!!it may be hard to believe at times.but if you give your self the chance you are worth.you can accomplish anything you want in sobriety.just remember!!!"nothing is so bad a drink won't make worse"NOTHING!!! thanks for reading my share!!!!! Signed:John.L //Delaware
Member: Annoymous
Location: ..
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 21:20:59
rj If you are so serene, Why are you in here yelling at us? Maybe these work better than yours when used in combination with f2f meetings/
Member: Bruce A.
Location: Bovard, PA
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 21:41:13
Hi! My name is Bruce A. and I am an alcoholic. The Promises are an excellent topic.I have been sober over fifteen yrs. and all of the promises have materialized in my life. I don't live in that deep dispair anymore. The past has been my key to the future. Sharing our experience to the future. I have found serenity and realize God is doing for me what I could not do for myself. Some of the promises slip away at times because I let them. But If I work the steps I can attain them again. I have to maintain my spiritual program . Love you all Bruce A.
Member: Pat S
Location: Duluth, MN
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 22:02:02
I'm Pat an alcoholic. One of the best promises that has come true for me is the new freedom and happiness! I've been sober for just shy of 5 years. When I first got to AA I was so gripped with fear I had no freedom. After alot of meetings and talking with my sponsor for many many hours I started to feel a real sense of happiness and the fear of everything slowly slipped away. Today I am free of the compulsion to drink, free of self will run riot, free of fearing the things I have no control over. I'm so grateful to be sober today. Thank you. Pat.
Member: JOE G
Location: MIAMI
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 22:07:45
Member: JOEG
Location: MIAMI
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 22:21:25
THE PROMISES TO ME GIVE ME FAITH THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE I DON;T HAVE TO DRINK AND EVENTUALLY all things work out ok I STATE THIS AFTER 23 YRS OF CONTINUOUS SOBRIETY IN A,A, ANY DRUNK CAN STAY SOBER AS LONG ME ITS THOSE 1ST HOURS DAYS OR WEEKS YOU HAVE TO HANG IN THERE NO MATTER WHAT YOUR THE ONE WHO WILL REAP THE BENEFITS GOD BLESS ALL A.SA.S
Member: JOEG
Location: MIAMI
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 22:21:57
THE PROMISES TO ME GIVE ME FAITH THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE I DON;T HAVE TO DRINK AND EVENTUALLY all things work out ok I STATE THIS AFTER 23 YRS OF CONTINUOUS SOBRIETY IN A,A, ANY DRUNK CAN STAY SOBER AS LONG ME ITS THOSE 1ST HOURS DAYS OR WEEKS YOU HAVE TO HANG IN THERE NO MATTER WHAT YOUR THE ONE WHO WILL REAP THE BENEFITS GOD BLESS ALL A.SA.S
Member: JOEG
Location: MIAMI
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 22:22:30
THE PROMISES TO ME GIVE ME FAITH THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE I DON;T HAVE TO DRINK AND EVENTUALLY all things work out ok I STATE THIS AFTER 23 YRS OF CONTINUOUS SOBRIETY IN A,A, ANY DRUNK CAN STAY SOBER AS LONG ME ITS THOSE 1ST HOURS DAYS OR WEEKS YOU HAVE TO HANG IN THERE NO MATTER WHAT YOUR THE ONE WHO WILL REAP THE BENEFITS GOD BLESS ALL A.SA.S
Member: Jim C.
Location: Atlanta
Date: 03 Mar 1999
Time: 22:26:10
Hi JIMMY C. alcoholic
Well boy's & girl's here's one that found sobriety on this site. I'm only on day 16 and the site was all I had for a few days REALLY. Maybe you did forget the shame and wanting hide under a grain of sand feelings, that damn knot in your GUT... Well this helped bring me out of my shell and get my ass to a f2f, plus... got to met some cool people here too ( called some on phone). Hey who knows I havent gotten a sponsor yet maybe I'll get a cyber one ????? After all I have the computer on all day at work, and I'm the only employee !!!!! This really keeps me from going to the beer store all damn day, plus I acually get some thing done. GOD bless all U cyber alkies.
Bring on day 17 I'm ready !!! Now back to mtng.
ICQ # 32339868 pteinc@flash.net
Member: Bruce M
Location: KC
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 09:09:45
Hi Cybers - I'm Bruce and I'm an alcoholic. Been around the meetings for yrs but never was able to promise myself I would go to a meeting that day or call a sponsor if I was setting myself up. Now I Strongly feel I have promised to do this. It really feels different this time. I never went to consecutive meetings. Well I've been sober 7 days now and have made 7 consecutive meetings. Thats a miracle! Met some really good people in my regular group. Never felt that way before. Spirtuality is there too - it's great. As they say, we can't help you if you drink, but we can if you are sober. I can't think of anything else that works! With that - I Pass - Thanks All
Member: Cindy E.
Location: Florida
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 10:06:37
Hello. MY name is Cindy.-Another alcoholic.This is my first time talking on computer. It is amazing what you can gain during sobriety.I am 17 months sober. When I think of the promises,I always remember my past. Even through my drunken years I had always desired and sought a better way of life, but always fell short.I wanted to be a good mother, friend,wife,employee,co-worker,lover,have a stable home life, etc. Today I have achieved that and much more in just the short time I have.My cravings were given to my Higher Power and my suicidal thoughts of driving myself and my two boys over a bridge have been changed to enjoying life and attending their school plays! It is amazing to me how I went from fighting the compulsion to drink to wathing my character defects! To the newcomers, It is not always going to be painless, but it is a great way of life. What lengths are you willing to go to for your PROMISES to come through? Just keep coming back, the miracle will happen.
Member: Rich R
Location: Detroit
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 11:59:49
Great topic Geri, thank you. And thanks to all who have posted so far. Many of THE PROMISES have started to come true for me over these past 8 years. Without going into detail, I wanted to share something ABOUT the promises instead. I met a guy in the program who could RECITE the promises from memory. I was impressed. When I was on vacation one time I was doing a lot of walking and I had time, so I decided to try to memorize the promises. It took quite awhile (maybe a few wet spots), but I did it. Now when I go for a walk or am waiting in a check out line, I recite the promises to myself, almost like a meditation. It really helps me, just thought I would share it with you, my friends in recovery. Thanks for reading this.
Member: Tom A.
Location: Carlisle, AR
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 14:45:24
Hello to all of my friends on Staying Cyber's Discussion Meeting. My name is Tom A. an I'm a grateful sober recovering Alcoholic, by the Grace of God and this wonderful fellowship known as AA. Thank you Geri W. in Virginia for suggesting a topic that has produced all sorts of comments, we indeed are a diverse group. By the way Geri W. I got sober in Norfolk, VA a very special place for me.
As an old timer, I suggest that if we can practice the Three Legacies of AA in our daily life we will experience the EXTRAVAGANT PROMISES mentioned on pages 83 and 84. Lagacy One is called Recovery, The Twelve Steps, Legacy Two is called Unity, The Twelve Traditions, and Legacy Three is called Service, The Twelve Concepts. I have found out that this works for me.
I thank everyone for their comments this week, I have certainly read something that will help me to stay sober today. I also am grateful for this site and I'm sure there are many Loners and Internationalists who are happy about it too.
My everyone try to enjoy their sobriety today.
God Bless - Tom A. ate@gte.net
Member: Dale S.
Location: California
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 15:43:32
The Big Book is full of promises not just the ones on page 83,84. All have come true for me. When I first came I really didn't care about any stinking promises LOL. I just wanted to stop drinking and that happened (by the Grace of God.) After the death of my son the promises became paramount. The most important being " Follow the dictates of a higher power and you will live in a NEW and wonderful world no matter what you present circumstances are." (Pg. 100 ) I was is desperate need of a NEW world. My old world was dead. Although AA is not meant to be support group for grief it became just that. The most wonderful caring people in the world, I found this in the fellowship of AA. The world largest support group. I can't begin to explain the allegiance and strength I found in the people of AA. I found that I needed people for the first time in my life. I now twice owe my life to you. I think I keep coming back to the place of miracles.
Member: John G.
Location: California
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 16:08:02
I often hear people tell me that AA is not religious. But the best evidence for AA religiosity is the Big Book itself.
Within just the first 164 pages of text and its twenty pages of preliminary material alone, God and associated words, e.g., Godly, God-given, etc., are used 174 times. Use of personal pronouns referring to the Christian god, with the first letter capitalized, total 62 – for a sum of 236 usages in the first 164 pages. Other terms relative to the Christian god, e.g., Creator, Boss Universal, and so on, are used 55 times. The words spiritual, religion, and religious are used 142 times. Direct biblical references or paraphrases are quoted 11 times. All religious references and words are used in a positive sense.
Pages 171-561 of the Big Book consist of 43 purportedly true-life stories of alcoholics who gained sobriety through the auspices of AA. Each reads as a tale of personal helplessness, sin, and redemption. Each contains passages that exhort the reader to find the Christian god through prayer and adherence to the Twelve Steps.
Chapter Four, entitled: “We Agnostics,” is a barely veiled, but direct attack, on Atheists and Agnostics. In tone, this chapter is arrogantly self-assured. It savages those who would be silly enough to use their critical thinking faculties and natural self-sufficiency instead of relying on mystic faith in the hypothetical Christian god. A common admonishment in AA circles is: “You’re a prisoner of the intellect.” This platitude springs from the visceral anti-intellectualism of Chapter Four. The unmistakable message of the chapter, taken as a whole is: Don’t think; just believe and your troubles will be solved. For those who won’t or can’t comply with this pithy advice, the message is equally clear: You are insane and will die unless you come to believe as we do.
The Big Book of AA clearly exposes the inherent religiosity of the program. But for those yet unconvinced, consider what just a few court decisions indicate.
In Grandberg v Ashland County, a 1984 Wisconsin ruling concerning judicially mandated AA attendance, the court said:
Alcoholics Anonymous materials…and the testimony of the witness established beyond a doubt that religious activities, as defined in constitutional law, were a part of the treatment program. The distinction between religion and spirituality is meaningless, and serves merely to confuse the issue.
In a 1994 New York case, Warner v Orange County Department of Probation, a man who had been convicted of drunk driving was sentenced to AA as an alternative to prison. The court found that the county was guilty of “coercing the plaintiff into participating in religious exercises, an act which tends toward the establishment of a state religious faith.”
In 1994, all materials from Hazelden Publications, a publishing arm of AA, were ordered out of California Youth Authority classrooms. Additionally, decrees announcing the right to refuse Twelve-Step participation were posted in all living quarters.
A 1994 federal court case, O’Connor v Orange County and the State of California, found AA to be religious and ordered the State of California to offer alternatives to Twelve-Step programs in any state-funded or mandated program.
In Griffin v Coughlin on June 11, 1996, the New York Court of Appeals ruled that the substance abuse program in use by the New York Department of Corrections was unconstitutional because, “after a fair reading of the doctrinal literature of AA, [the Twelve-Step program was found to be] unequivocally religious.”
In August of 1996, the U.S. Court of Appeals, Seventh District ruled in Kerr v Lind, et al., that due to AA’s religiosity, an inmate’s rights were violated when privileges and consideration for parole were withdrawn as a direct result of his refusal to participate in Twelve-Step meetings.
In December of 1996, the U. S. Supreme Court turned down, without comment, New York’s appeal to have the Griffin v Coughlin ruling overturned, in effect agreeing with the Court of Appeals’ finding.
Ellen Luff of the American Civil Liberties Union said that nearly all criminal defendants who fight AA attendance on religious grounds win, and that similar lawsuits don’t even have to go to trial because “the case that it [AA] is a religion is so strong.”
This ain’t rocket science, folks. Bluntly, anyone who tells you that AA is not religious is either stupid, suffers from some sort of perceptual deficit, and/or has a certain AA philosophical axe to grind. This more than passes the crap test, and with flying colors. If it looks, smells, feels, and sounds like crap, it probably IS crap. And, legally, no one can force you to swallow a plateful for confirmation.
Member: Geri W
Location: Va.
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 17:34:40
Geri, a very grateful alcoholic here. John G., it's ok to "rant" at the religious aspect of the AA program if you chose. There are those of us who have come to see the difference between spiritual and religion. Whatever works for you. As long as you don't drink. Some of us have also found that we have reached that place where we have stopped fighting - and tolerate other's beliefs. I now have a Higher Power that I choose to call God. I didn't find him in the church of my childhood, but through working the steps as outlined in the Big Book. So whatever you chose to use is fine by me. I accept that AA is a spiritual program - don't think the first 100 ever tried to hide it. Me either. I could care less what the legal system says. Bruce - 7 days,7meetings. Great. Hope you are getting what you need. Jim C. ougta be 17 by now. Congrats.. Dale S - you have once more proved it works. Hugs, geri
Member: Geri S.
Location: upstate NY
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 18:30:09
Geri S. here. This is my first visit to a AA website. This is a great topic. I have been given a lot of attention this week to the part of the promises, "we will intuitively know how to handle situations that used to baffle us". The other day as I was driving to work I was thinking about several situations that have taken place in my life recently, how I handled them and how differntly I would have handled them before I got sober. After I thought about how I had handled these situation, I questioned whether I handled them properly. At that monemnt a car in the left lane beeped at me and I looked over to see a group member waving as he passed. We were thirty miles from our town. If there was any question in my mind, I know I am traveling on the right road. Sobriety is truely a miracle.
Member: Geri S.
Location: upstate NY
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 18:30:49
Geri S. here. This is my first visit to a AA website. This is a great topic. I have been given a lot of attention this week to the part of the promises, "we will intuitively know how to handle situations that used to baffle us". The other day as I was driving to work I was thinking about several situations that have taken place in my life recently, how I handled them and how differntly I would have handled them before I got sober. After I thought about how I had handled these situation, I questioned whether I handled them properly. At that monemnt a car in the left lane beeped at me and I looked over to see a group member waving as he passed. We were thirty miles from our town. If there was any question in my mind, I know I am traveling on the right road. Sobriety is truely a miracle.
Member: lou
Location: ks
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 18:41:28
hi this is lou all i no is i was once dead and now i am alive allso it seams like every where i go life goes with me the gift of giveing is the best to watch people come back to life is the best promes of all''''
Member: Corinne B.
Location: CA
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 18:47:32
Great Day to Be Sober! Corinne, Alcoholic here, there & everywhere!
I say it's a great day to be sober because today is my 60th day of continuous sobriety! This is the 2nd time I have been blessed with this gift! I began returning to AA in November 1998 after a 6 and a half year R&D run, which followed 6 years and 6 weeks of sobriety that were indeed filled to the brim with many of the promises! Unfortunately, I took it all for granted and stopped attending meetings, working with my sponsor, the steps, etc., and insanity crept in telling me I could drink like a normal person! Big fat lie!!!
I have been working with a sponsor, recently did some major 4-9 step working, and amazingly some of those promises are coming true for me again already! Just yesterday, my car was on the DOA list and I did not drink over it! I thought about it, but I called AAA and got it towed, then called a friend and my sponsor in AA and got my mind out of hock! The weird thing is, fear of people & of economic insecurity has been dogging me pretty bad the past couple of months, but I'm actually, finally, coming to terms with it by the work I am doing using the tools of this program! Not perfectly, not every second, but enough to keep me sober and sane one more day!
Thanks for letting me share - now I get to go pay to get my wheels back - the amount of money that I've had to put into my car the past 3 weeks is exactly equal to the amount of money that I was recently "given back" (in a round-about way), so I'm even-steven! Wow - it works!
Love & Hugs - Corinne B. (The Real Me)
Member: tyrel m
Location: norway
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 18:48:08
my name is tyrel and i am an alcohoic/addict- i am very greatful to be sober another day- i had written a few days ago about almost slipping and, it was the rude awakening i needed, i always have to learn the hard way, by the grace of god i dindn't get drunk or high and i am now back on my feet and working on myself- i can once again see the promises comming, 'we will know how to handle situations which used to baffel us'- i really like this online-meeting, cause no matter where in the world you are you are able to write your thoughts and have others that understand what we are talking about- today i went to an NA meeting that was in norweigan, but i really needed a meeting so i went- 'is it odd, or is it god', the topic was a first step for a new commer that slipped after 10 yrs- it was just what i need to hear, and it was great to say that i am an addict also, even though i feel that alcohol and drugs are no different in what type of effect they have on us cause we use either for the same reasons- to escape, to enhace, or for most of us to feel 'normal' and able to function, but still i forget sometimes that i need to remind myself of who and the places i hang out, that if drugs are involed it is time to go- rolling a joint for someone else and then giving a shotgun to someone( put the joint in your mouth backwards and blow so the smoke goes into the others mout or nose) just to prove how big of an addict you were, is like a problem drinker that is sober and working a program of recovery and walking around witha bottle of alcohol in hishand with the lid off smelling the fumes and then putting it in his mouth and spitting it out- that is what happened to me- my ego was telling me to prove my recovery to them and to myself- red alert!! i don't need to prove anything to anyone any more- by the grace of god i din't put that joint in the other way and inhale instead of blow- this wasn't the best way to wake up and start looking at myself but all in all oi am glad it happened- i truely needed it to drop my ego and self will- any comments are greatly apreciated- take care, remember the pain to stay clear of the insanity- all of your answers can be solved within the first 164pgs of the big book of alcoholics anonymous- take care of you- most of the time this is a 'selfish program'- email at:) tmosness@hotmail.com icq#-29340385- keep coming back it work if you work it, doesn't work itself, hope tyrel m
Member: tyrel m
Location: norway
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 18:55:28
my name is tyrel and i am an alcohoic/addict- i am very greatful to be sober another day- i had written a few days ago about almost slipping and, it was the rude awakening i needed, i always have to learn the hard way, by the grace of god i dindn't get drunk or high and i am now back on my feet and working on myself- i can once again see the promises comming, 'we will know how to handle situations which used to baffel us'- i really like this online-meeting, cause no matter where in the world you are you are able to write your thoughts and have others that understand what we are talking about- today i went to an NA meeting that was in norweigan, but i really needed a meeting so i went- 'is it odd, or is it god', the topic was a first step for a new commer that slipped after 10 yrs- it was just what i need to hear, and it was great to say that i am an addict also, even though i feel that alcohol and drugs are no different in what type of effect they have on us cause we use either for the same reasons- to escape, to enhace, or for most of us to feel 'normal' and able to function, but still i forget sometimes that i need to remind myself of who and the places i hang out, that if drugs are involed it is time to go- rolling a joint for someone else and then giving a shotgun to someone( put the joint in your mouth backwards and blow so the smoke goes into the others mout or nose) just to prove how big of an addict you were, is like a problem drinker that is sober and working a program of recovery and walking around witha bottle of alcohol in hishand with the lid off smelling the fumes and then putting it in his mouth and spitting it out- that is what happened to me- my ego was telling me to prove my recovery to them and to myself- red alert!! i don't need to prove anything to anyone any more- by the grace of god i din't put that joint in the other way and inhale instead of blow- this wasn't the best way to wake up and start looking at myself but all in all oi am glad it happened- i truely needed it to drop my ego and self will- any comments are greatly apreciated- take care, remember the pain to stay clear of the insanity- all of your answers can be solved within the first 164pgs of the big book of alcoholics anonymous- take care of you- most of the time this is a 'selfish program'- email at:) tmosness@hotmail.com icq#-29340385- keep coming back it work if you work it, doesn't work itself, hope tyrel m
Member: Janet S
Location: PA
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 19:11:13
Hi, My name is Janet. And I think I may be an alcoholic. I am confused. Just when I thought I would be ok, I am not. I have read alot of the comments on this page. My question is, "How do I handle the first steps, what helps you to deal with it after a hard day at work?" I need an outlet. My husband is getting his masters degree and I am making his life hell. (excuse the language) I lie to him, tell him I am not when I am. I have loved him for 13 yrs and want to love him for several more. I don't want to hurt him anymore. I have made myself a promise not to touch it till my birthday, a month from now, I am doing this for starters. Any suggestions for a very very new kid on the block?
Member: Chris H.
Location: Colorado
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 19:16:23
Hi, Chris here, and an alcoholic.
I have a few comments in response to the self will calisthenics expressed by John G.
First Mr. John, the proper protocol for a discussion meeting is to announce your name followed by the words, and "I'm an alcoholic." If you are not an alcoholic, then you are in the wrong place, and may wish to attend lawyer's Anonymous or what ever 12th step program they have for those whom have a problem understanding common law.
Secondly, the 12 Traditions specifically prohibit discussion of outside issues. For this matter, this forum is to help those who suffer from alcoholism. As simple as this may seem, this is the expressed purpose of these meetings. There are times in meetings that people experience the emotional diatribes of neurotic members of the program, and I certainly feel for their confusion. However, there are appropriate programs for those with emotional mental traumas, and I might suggest checking into another type of treatment program or clinic, if you feel the program is not enough to handle your problem with alcoholism. Many willing and able social professionals can help with such emotional problems, and you might be surprised what a good chat with a therapist could do. Since this program is voluntary, I offer this as merely a suggestion to help you with your issues.
Speaking of the fact that this is a voluntary program, there are no dues or fees for membership, nor are any members of AA compelled to continue attending AA. I might add that the court can also sentence people to jail or death for a crime, in addition to cleaning up streets, punching licence plates, and attending all sorts of classes and programs. In that regard, that is a court decision, and not an AA decision. You can surely leave AA by your own free will at any time.
Next, as a paying member of the ACLU, I truly believe that my concept of a Higher Power is fully consistent with my freedom to choose, and I personally go where ever I please. I have been to nearly every kind of church imaginable, just to check them out, and in a number of countries around the world. I have had very pleasant experiences for the most part I might add, however, I have not chosen to adopt ANY of their particular concepts of God, because my personal concept of a higher power is more than adequate for my sobriety. I seriously doubt that many other of the millions of people in AA have my concept of a higher power, if so, good for them. Incidentally, I have had a number of committed atheist friends whom routinely discuss their spiritual experiences, and indicate their appreciation for a connectedness with mother nature. For them reality and nature are spiritual enough. If that is what keeps them sober, more power to them.
Also, if long-term sobriety truly required forced attendance in AA, I would have been drunk long ago, and I would not be in the program now.
Finally, your comment "Chapter Four, entitled: "We Agnostics," is a barely veiled, but direct attack, on Atheists and Agnostics. In tone, this chapter is arrogantly self-assured." Good luck in your quest finding a higher power Mr. John, maybe statue is your higher power, if so, I do hope it can keep you sober!
Member: JeanieW
Location: So.Bend, IN
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 19:49:49
Hi! I'm Jeanie, grateful recovering alcoholic. I read here a lot more than I talk - generally save that for my face-2-face meetings, but I have to respond here, both to the topic of promises and to John G. First of all, the most important promise kept is that I'm alive. Without AA I most assuredly would not be alive today. For John G., I wasn't a particularly religious person when I came to AA and I don't think of myself as "religious" but I believe in the God who saved me from an alcoholic death and I have become a Christian because I believe its the truth, not because the Big Book said so. I have only one short quote for you, "The fool in his heart says there is no God". Maybe you could rethink the issue. Chris is right, too. If you're not an alcoholic looking for recovery, you're in the wrong place and it is resented. I know I'm not supposed to have those, but I share things with other alcoholic I wouldn't share otherwise. Think it over, John.
Regards, JeanieW
Member: Wil
Location: Ak
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 19:51:48
Hello all, I am an alcoholic and I have found that in order to stay dry I have had to break off some friendships whic I have had for a very long time. It is most important that I continue to help myself to make new relationship whic can and will help me stay sober. Thanks for listening and God Bless. WIl
Member: Mike
Location: Seattle
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 20:01:21
Hi Mike, alchoholic. I'm in a mode where I probably need to go to a meeting and talk about what's going on.
I had a great deal to whine about divorces, hearings, and lost property all as a direct result of drinking. But after reading these posts for a while, something happened inside, just as it does at a meeting. The miracle or serenity for one more day happens each time any of us go to a meeting. "God" doesn't seem to care if you believe anything. Just shut up, read or listen, and IT happens.
On line, not on-line, Christian or not, seems irrelevant to the power within this program. Those that decry the Biblical roots of AA through the Oxford Group miss a tremendous opportunity to try it and see if it works. I came to believe that this Higher Power whom I choose to identify as the Hebrew God Jehova in the person of Jesus Christ can work a miracle in my life. The promises are fulfilled and God is doing for me what I could not do for myself.
Someone pointed out above that it's mostly an inside job. True. But one the inside is straightened, even a little, the external stuff seems to follow like sunrise follows night. The God of my choosing is capable of restoring anything that I lost as a drunk. I choose to trust Him with my life and will. I am amazed at the results. I am also amazed at my stupidity when I forget who and what is in charge of my life and will. Step 10, "God, I trust You. God, I trust You. ... Thank-you." seems to work wonders.
Unfortunately, I have known a few others decorating this program who decry in massive pseudo-intellectual terms the spiritual (God based) elements of this program. Those of us who have experienced a spiritual awakening as a result of following these steps suggest: "Keep coming back."
I remain, by the grace of God who gave this program to a hospitalized drunk, a Grateful, recovering alchoholic. Thanks for being here when I needed to whine and ramble.
Member: Phil H
Location: New Hampshire
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 20:46:43
Hi my name is Phil and I am an alcoholic. Grateful to be here sober. Grateful to be any where where I am not getting kicked out or in trouble. I didnt get into trouble every time I drank, but every time I got into trouble I had been drinking. Geri W what a great topic, the promises have come true for me, I have a wife and kids. I am a part of life, and to the best of my ability, I try to be of use to somebody during my days. Some days I dont do so well, other days, Im some kind of sobrietal action figure, with a Kung Fu grip. The point is, due to the power of the 12 steps of recovery, the fellowship of AA and a good sponsor, I HAVE A LIFE. It may not be legal and binding, but it sure is better than waking up in some ditch, cover with last nights potato salad. The only promises I got out of a bottle was if you drink me, you will get drunk. To Mr Legality from California...you guys out there sure do run meetings different than we do over here on the other side of the country. Courtesy, Kindness, Justice and Love is what the Big Book talks about. It teaches us that the respect for all things living is important. That when we drank we were destroying the very things most precious to us...ourselves and our loved ones. It also taught me with my sponsors help to look the world in the eye, to settle with the past, and to live life to the fullest. "As Gods people we stand on our feet we crawl before no one" Those words come just before the promises and mean a great deal to me, and no one can take them away legally or otherwise. Its interesting to note that AA has no opinion on outside issues and there do not usually show up "legally speaking" to these suits. The only people that go are spectators. AA does not engage unless forced to. Forgive me I do go on. To Janet S hang in there Kid it gets better. Dont drink, go to meetings, ask for help. You might do well to take in some actual meetings. There are people there that are just like you. They know what you are feeling, they know what you are talking about, and can make a real difference in your life. I know it tough but just remember it that first drink that gets you. If you are standing on the train track which do you think will hurt worse the engine or the caboose. Good Luck, keep coming. Enough out of me, I do tend to go on about the things that I care about. Thank you for listening. Phil........
Member: Dan F.
Location: Ma.
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 21:12:45
Hi I'm Dan, gratefully recovering (with a higher power) alcoholic. first time in the online meeting. Excellent John G. from Ca. are you sober? Are you happy? I don't understand what religon has to do with the promises but feel a need to pass this on after reading your comments. From the Big Book page 164 "Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, (a promise) if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven't got." As I heard it, religon is for those who are trying to stay out of hell, spirituality is for those who have been there. I realize that this is cross talk but . As far as the promises , they are throughout the B.B. I was promised when I came to A.A. that if I did the work I would have a life second to none I have that life today thanks for letting me share . KEEP COMING May God bless and keep you until then
Member: Janet S.
Location: PA
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 21:13:26
To Phil.....Thank you very much. You don't realize how much you helped me. Janet S.
Member: Leslie T.
Location: Texas
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 21:46:33
Hi, I'm Leslie , and I am an alcoholic. this is the first time I've been to Staying Cyber, and I 'm grateful to find ya'll here -- I had planned on going to a meeting tonight at my home group here in Katy, Texas, but I put some other things first and did't get there. Found myself feeling a little craqy and thought I'd try a meeting on-line. Janet, I remember my first few months in AA meetings. I wasn't sure if I was or wasn't an alcoholic, either. I sure didn't have any trouble identifying with the second half of the first step: my life was very unmanageable (by the way the first step of this 12 step program is "Admitted we were powerless over alcohol and that our lives had become unmanagable." By unmanageable I mean: I felt like a juggler trying to keep 25 or 30 balls in the air and not even really sure which balls were where or what it was I was trying to do with them! Powerlessness over alcohol - that was a big problem for me. I had quit many times, but I kept starting again! And when I drank I never knew in advance for sure how much I would drink: I really drank for only one reason. I loved the way it made me feel. After many years of drinking I kept trying to recapture the way it made me feel the first time: I felt as though I really belonged. i had always felt like an outcast before. I was very shy and scared of being in social situations where I felt inadequate. (As my drinking progressed , I made sure I was always well "lubricated" before I went anywhere socially, and, later on, before I went anywhere at all! I really didn't want to be an alcoholic, you see. I just wanted to be a little sloshed so that I felt relaxed and comfortable. Because I didn't feel relaxed and comfortable unless I was a little sloshed. But I couldn't always be sure I 'd just be a little sloshed. And toward the end of my drinking career I drank by myself, and hid the bottles(although I told myself I was only making sure that my husband didn'tdrink it up before I got my share). I really did have a problem, you see. I quit drinking in August of 1990 for good. I was sure allwould be O.K. It got worse. You see, I drank because I couldn't stand living my life without drinking. But then i got to a point where I couldn't stand to drink anymore either! I was in a fix! Which is where AA comes in. What AA has to offer I would not have been willing to try if I hadn't been desperate. Janet, if you're desperate enough this thing will work... get yourself a copy of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous and read it. Go to meetings. Lots of meetings. And keep asking questions and follow the suggestions. Many of us have felt just as you do right now. The confusion is part of it. I recommend going to "live" meetings. It really helps to see and hear real bodies in the room with me. The on-line stuff is great if you can't get to a meeting, by the way, AA is in the phonebook everywhere. Call the number and ask where a meeting is. And keep coming back! (Ihave for over 8 years, and hope to continue for the rest of my life! which is definitely not how I felt shen I first got here!)
Member: Chuck K.
Location: Texas
Date: 04 Mar 1999
Time: 21:50:31
Hi, my name is Chuck and I'm an alcoholic. I'm sober today only by the Grace of God and His doing for me what I could never do for myself.
Dear Janet S., I agree with Phil. There will certainly be a meeting somewhere near you. Go,just as I did in 1984, and hear how many people realy understand you. Go and learn about our program--12 steps of recovery-- and enjoy our fellowship. Find the miracle of the promises as you stay sober and work the program one day at a time. If it can happen for me, it can happen for you. And it did happen for me and still does almost 15 years, a wife, a daughter, and a son later. I am so grateful for this program and the God of my understanding. I love AA in all its parts and all its members, both actual and potential.
God Bless you all. Keep on keepin' on.
Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 00:41:39
JOHN G: If you don't have a desire to stop drinking, please don't post here. If you are one of us, please take it to the coffee pot so this meeting can stay on topic. Thank you.
JOE S, JEANIE W, MIKE, & CHRIS H: There is a great room at this site for crosstalk, putting people down, and calling them names. It's the Coffee Pot (see link below). Please help keep the peace here by taking the arguments there. Thank you.
JANET S: The hardest time for me to resist drinking was right after a hard day at work. Since the day usually started off with a hangover, just about every day at work was a hard one. Plus, I was a workaholic to boot. I'd leave work with a pounding headache, tired, hungry, and worn-out. Even when I'd swear I was going straight home, I'd still end up at a bar or a liquor store before making it home. What worked for me was going to an AA meeting right after work, before going home. It was amazing! Within 10 minutes of entering the meeting, the headache was gone, I'd feel refreshed, and I wouldn't even think about drinking on my way home. I know it sounds too good to be true, but please do yourself a favor and give it a try.
Please excuse the multiple posts this week. Peace & Serenity.
Member: Jim R.
Location: Chgo
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 01:19:58
If you don't drink, you don't get drunk... it's a promise.
Yours in the fellowship
Jim R.
Member: Teri F.
Location: Marion, Ohio
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 08:37:58
John G.---Whatever.....Keep coming back.
Member: Bruce M
Location: KC
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 11:10:10
Remember no matter how long you have been sober, we are all only 1 drink away.
Scary thought but AA helps you stay away!
Keep Coming Back !
Member: Julian B
Location: London UK
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 13:47:11
I have been sober for nearly 10 months. althought my mind and thoughts are now becoming clearer. My social life is zero. I never go out anymore. All of my old haunts and friends are starting to become attractive to me again. I am thinking of seeing if it is possable for me to drink sociably again. I know this is stupid, but my life is so boring.
Member: Lynn C.
Location: Southern Illinois
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 14:21:55
The Promises,
right on Dale, I have one of those big book indexes. I looked up the promises and in addition to pg. 83 & 84, it references pages 63, 75, 100, 115-116 and 120.
I just finished doing another 4th & 5th step on Monday. I can can honestly say this promise from page 75 which is reffering to the 5th step has been true for me since I copleted this last 5th thep on Monday. Here is what it says:
" WE pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of charactor, every dark cranny of the past. Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We csn be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall away from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator. We may have spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience. The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly."
thanks for the oppertunity to share that
Lynn C.
Member: craig j.
Location: hartford,ct
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 15:30:52
hello, i'm craig/ and i'm insane but if i don't drink--it won't show--as much. As quoted by a member of a group i attend. Julian in London--sobriety is torture and boring without working the steps. My sponsor says, 'We suffer dry rot if we do not move forward and get current with our lives.' The old days probably look good because your current perception of you does not appeal to you right now and the feelings you have had regarding the person that looks back at you in the mirror, but it will change provided you work the steps. Your true friends may not be your old ones. Keep London safe, and do not drink TODAY. peace.
Member: craig j.
Location: hartford,ct
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 15:35:14
hello, i'm craig/ and i'm insane but if i don't drink--it won't show--as much. As quoted by a member of a group i attend. Julian in London--sobriety is torture and boring without working the steps. My sponsor says, 'We suffer dry rot if we do not move forward and get current with our lives.' The old days probably look good because your current perception of you does not appeal to you right now and the feelings you have had regarding the person that looks back at you in the mirror, but it will change provided you work the steps. Your true friends may not be your old ones. Keep London safe, and do not drink TODAY. peace.
Member: jim w
Location: walnutport pa
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 16:06:59
hi everyone I'm jim an alky the promises are a great topic. i'm coming up ;on eight months sober and the promises are some of the rewards for sobriety. Sometimes though i wonder about "you shall not regret the past or wish to dwell on it". I hurt a lot of people along the way and i must admit i think of it quite often. Perhaps we must remember as a way to keep it green for us each and every day. Apparently i needed every drink along the way to find my way into these rooms. anyway, it does work if you are willing to work it. Go easy Go slow Fo far
Member: Janet S
Location: PA
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 19:53:17
Hi, this is Janet again, on my second day of realization....and guess what, I have finally said it. Last night I said it to myself and today, just a little bit ago, I said it to my husband of 13 yrs. "I am an alcoholic" I feel a relief, but a scary relief, if that makes any sense. It is scary to say I can never drink again in my entire life. Thanks so much for everyones responces. I will try to hang in there if everyone else does. Take care.
Member: Carol S.
Location: New Jersey
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 20:24:00
Hi! I'm Carol, an alcoholic, new to stayingcyber but celebrated 8yrs in January and am happy to find this. The promises have come true so many times in my life. Seems like everytime a problem arises, as long as I wait, pray and go with what feels right, things always work out. Sometimes I hate the waiting, but that's something I've had to learn to do instead of doing things my way. Hang in there those of you who are new. This is a beautiful way to live life don't leave before the miracle happens!! It will. I am living proof.
Member: Betty L.
Location: Georgia
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 22:04:00
Hi, I'm Betty a grateful recovering alcoholic. When I came into this program it was suggested that I read page 83 -84 -85 -86 - 87 every morning. Frankly I was afraid not to, these are the pages that gave me hope. In time, and I do mean time, I could see where they do come through. Being so familiar with them, I was able to recognize little nuances that were obviously no coincidences. "God will do for you what you could not do for yourself." As for the "new freedom and new happiness," depression was my middle name. I was suicidal for 50 years of my life. Thanks to the program of AA and my HP, I no longer have to be depressed unless I want to be, for that I am very grateful.
Member: John P.
Location: W.Pa.
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 22:17:22
This discussion is the first time I have seen AA "on line." So I feel a little wowed by the technology. I mainly make meetings near Pittsburgh. I knew, as well as I "knew" anything, that AA was NOT going to get me sober. Can't say I mind being proved wrong, at least up through today's meeting in PA. Half-measures availed us nothing -- when left to my own I would have settled for half. Thanks for your imput on my day. Gratefully.
Member: larry m
Location: north dakota
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 22:59:04
Im only on my 2nd 24 hrs . Some strange things been happening.Went to 1st mtg last nite and a aa offered his help. Went to coffe and chatted, it helped to know someone cared. That i didnt even Know. Went to my doctor today to discuss my drink problem. He floored me by telling me he,s an aa,and was aregular attender of the meeting I planned to go to tonite!!I truly can see my hp ,God working in my life.
Member: mary t
Location:
Date: 05 Mar 1999
Time: 23:25:02
I first wrote to you all 8 days ago wondering how I was going to make it thru that day. Lots of prayers and signs that hit me across the head that now is the time. Thank you all, Lizzy, Robin L , Deanna E. I'm very much here,and to everyone. Janet S, we sound alot alike. Lets stick with it. I'm proud of myself and like remembering what I did the night before. One question, I have had a splitting headache day and night since my last drink. Any connection? Its still alot better than the other headaches!! Yeah!!
Member: Yvonne
Location: Peekskill
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 00:12:28
Hello my name is Yvonne I'm a acoholic I am truly blessed to be apart of the fellowship of AA. I am residing in a halfway house and I just had my 1 year celebration. And I never thought I would make it this far.When I first came in the fellowship I was scared and confused. I went to rehab first and further my treatment to where I am now.And this 1 year sober is truly a gift. I have so many people in my life today. I remember the people in the fellowship told me to keep coming back. I was a mess I was very angry and definant and running my own progam. And then I found myself being very lonely. People didn't want to be around me. Because I had alot of street behaviors in me. I got a sponsor and I wanted to sponsor her instead of her sponsoring me. And then it suddenly hit me I was drunk without the drink.My attitude and behaviors was holding me back.Once I changed that I was on my way to recovery. It's a diease of attitudes and behavios. Today I have a beautiful life and I am living the halfway house in 2 weeks.And I am scared as hell but as long as I make my meetings and stay connected I nothing to fear just for today.
l
Member: Yvonne
Location: Peekskill
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 00:13:13
Hello my name is Yvonne I'm a acoholic I am truly blessed to be apart of the fellowship of AA. I am residing in a halfway house and I just had my 1 year celebration. And I never thought I would make it this far.When I first came in the fellowship I was scared and confused. I went to rehab first and further my treatment to where I am now.And this 1 year sober is truly a gift. I have so many people in my life today. I remember the people in the fellowship told me to keep coming back. I was a mess I was very angry and definant and running my own progam. And then I found myself being very lonely. People didn't want to be around me. Because I had alot of street behaviors in me. I got a sponsor and I wanted to sponsor her instead of her sponsoring me. And then it suddenly hit me I was drunk without the drink.My attitude and behaviors was holding me back.Once I changed that I was on my way to recovery. It's a diease of attitudes and behavios. Today I have a beautiful life and I am living the halfway house in 2 weeks.And I am scared as hell but as long as I make my meetings and stay connected I nothing to fear just for today.
l
Member: Yvonne
Location: Peekskill
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 00:14:09
Hello my name is Yvonne I'm a acoholic I am truly blessed to be apart of the fellowship of AA. I am residing in a halfway house and I just had my 1 year celebration. And I never thought I would make it this far.When I first came in the fellowship I was scared and confused. I went to rehab first and further my treatment to where I am now.And this 1 year sober is truly a gift. I have so many people in my life today. I remember the people in the fellowship told me to keep coming back. I was a mess I was very angry and definant and running my own progam. And then I found myself being very lonely. People didn't want to be around me. Because I had alot of street behaviors in me. I got a sponsor and I wanted to sponsor her instead of her sponsoring me. And then it suddenly hit me I was drunk without the drink.My attitude and behaviors was holding me back.Once I changed that I was on my way to recovery. It's a diease of attitudes and behavios. Today I have a beautiful life and I am living the halfway house in 2 weeks.And I am scared as hell but as long as I make my meetings and stay connected I nothing to fear just for today.
l
Member: Yvonne
Location: Peekskill
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 00:14:53
Hello my name is Yvonne I'm a acoholic I am truly blessed to be apart of the fellowship of AA. I am residing in a halfway house and I just had my 1 year celebration. And I never thought I would make it this far.When I first came in the fellowship I was scared and confused. I went to rehab first and further my treatment to where I am now.And this 1 year sober is truly a gift. I have so many people in my life today. I remember the people in the fellowship told me to keep coming back. I was a mess I was very angry and definant and running my own progam. And then I found myself being very lonely. People didn't want to be around me. Because I had alot of street behaviors in me. I got a sponsor and I wanted to sponsor her instead of her sponsoring me. And then it suddenly hit me I was drunk without the drink.My attitude and behaviors was holding me back.Once I changed that I was on my way to recovery. It's a diease of attitudes and behavios. Today I have a beautiful life and I am living the halfway house in 2 weeks.And I am scared as hell but as long as I make my meetings and stay connected I nothing to fear just for today.
l
Member: Yvonne G
Location: Peekskill
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 00:42:14
Hello my name is Yvonne I'm a Alcoholic I am very grateful to be apart of the fellowship of AA.My last drink was Feb. 20, 1998 I just celebrated my 1 year sober. It is truly a gift the first year. When I came in the fellowship I was very scared and confused,tired, lonely.I remember coming in to the fellowship with a attitude you would not believe. I did not want to listen to anybody I was running my own program. I went to rehab and then to a halfway house . Where I am residing now and I hated it when I first got there.I commented to 6 months. And I am still here 1 year later and it's great. I will be leaving here less than to week and I'm scared as hell. And I also remember wanting to leave everyday. Believe it or not I don't want to leave now. But I have to move on it's amazing how when it's time to leave these treatment places. You don't want to leave I have alot of fear and I'm scared as hell . But as long as I have my HP in my life and the fellowship of AA. Go to my meetings and remember where I came from. I have nothing to fear Just For Today.
Member: Ruthi
Location: Reno
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 00:46:59
Hi brothers and sisters of the Fellowship. I am 18 years sober in January. Who would have thought it. I read a lot from some very new people out there. Welcome. They are talking about the Promises. Before you can get to promises, please start at p.1 of the Big Book. Keep reading and don't drink and I guarentee the promises will come true for you too. I have had the joy of having all of the promises fufilled in my life. I had to start with the first meeting, the first day of sobriety, the first page in the book and the first step. Be good to yourselves and give yourself time. Listen to those who are staying sober, happy and serene. Then the promise will come for you. Much AA love to all.
Member: Elaine D.
Location: Upstate NY
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 01:04:57
Treat topic--the promises. HI. I'm an alcoholic named Elaine. The promises mean so much to me as I'm new (8 months) in sobriety. I can honestly say that each one has come true with the exception of not regretting the past nor wishing to shut the door on it. I think that is because I am still facing lots of consequences of my drinking and until I can make things right this promise will elude me. I want to share something that happened to me today to reinforce my gratitude. A dear friend lost her husband two years ago very suddenly. She is still very grief-stricken. We were discussing our problems when she said "I'd give anything to have your problem instead of mine." Once again, I was struck by how very fortunate we alcoholics are in that there is definitely something that we can do about our "problem" and that of course, is to follow the l2 steps of AA to continued sobriety. I will have extra prayers for my friend tonight and extra prayers of gratitude that God led me to AA.
Member: GW
Location: Maryland
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 03:52:23
Hi Im an alcoholic and my name is GW and just for today I have not had a drink. All the credit for my soberity goes to AA. I 've been around a few 24 hours and still have only scratched the surface of my illness. I need AA more today than I did when I first came in because I have more responsibilities. Thanks to my Hp for this siber meeting now I can have access to a meeting all the time. I know I need to get to more live meetings, but lately I have been dragging my feet. I think I need a swift kick in the hine to get me going. One of the most profound things I ever heard in an AA meeting is..Keep coming back. I love you all and for this alcoholic I must remember, we can do what I can not do alone.
GW
Member: Geri W
Location: Va
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 06:04:37
Geri, a very grateful alcholic here. Won't take much of the meeting time, but - Janet S., 2 days! Get to a face to face meeting. Let them help you. Look at what Larry M wrote - it's helping him. Julian, go to all the f2f you can. Devote as much time to AA as you did your past activities. I tried that and it worked for me.
Sorry for the "double dipping"
Member: Roby,J
Location: maine
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 11:23:49
Hi, this is my first aa on line meeting. My name is roby & i am an alcoholic! The promises came true for me when I entered the process of recovery, begining with the surrender of my will to God as I understand him. thenext gift I felt was when i emptied the darkness out of my temple,(conscience,spirit) orwhatever you choose to call it THis was by cleaning house,5th step. I am truly grateful.today,T>Y>
Member: Roby,J
Location: maine
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 11:25:35
Hi, this is my first aa on line meeting. My name is roby & i am an alcoholic! The promises came true for me when I entered the process of recovery, begining with the surrender of my will to God as I understand him. thenext gift I felt was when i emptied the darkness out of my temple,(conscience,spirit) orwhatever you choose to call it THis was by cleaning house,5th step. I am truly grateful.today,T>Y>
Member: Roy S.
Location:
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 12:22:06
I have been a member for a little over a year now, and I am seeing diferent "promises" come true all the time. The key is to stick with your higher power. There are many times when I feel that he can't possibly be watching or else I would not be in the predicament that I am. But, if I step beck and look at it again, it always turns out that he did "keep his promise", but just maybe in a little different way. Thanks for letting me share
Member: cathym
Location:
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 13:05:25
I am scaring myself to death with the amount I drink. I am almost too scared to post this. I'm definitely too scared to go to a meeting. What do I do?
Member: Janet S
Location: PA
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 14:19:26
To Cathym, I am on day 3 of admitting it to myself and my husband of 13 yrs. I was scared too. I am still scared. It only gets worse. I have not been to a meeting. I don't want to go if I don't have too. But, I have a feeling that if I get to close again I will have too and I have a feeling that if I do show up at a meeting, that I won't be the only one that is scared. If I am the only scared one there, I bet others will know just what I am feeling. I think coming in here and talking helps, try to keep it up. I sure am going to try. I have gotten so many people responding, using my name, giving good advice...that I am hooked, I look everyday and I am going to try to write every day or every other. Hope to see you again Cathym.
To Mary T., Yes, I know what you mean about the headaches. I am also afraid now of overeating. I am petite and in good shape, I don't want to lose that. I am afraid how I am going to be acting in a couple days, weeks, months...
To Geri W., Thanks. I know I have to go to a meeting, but I am scared people will find me out. I want to see if I can help myself first. This is helping me right now. And my husband is making me write a 6 page paper on several topics. For example, how I drank as a kid, an adult, self-esteem, and several other topics. That is helping too. It is making me see myself on paper.
Gotta go. I have alot more writing to do. Hang in there friends...
Member: Will R.
Location: San Antonio
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 14:56:56
Janet S, please just go to a meeting, and if you don't feel quite right at that one, try another one, but go. We know how conflicting these feelings can be, and the f2f meetings really do help a lot better than this does. You say you are afraid of being found out. Are you in a small town? Or in the suburbs? Then get to a big city and go today.
This is only my thought, but I see some a couple of big danger areas in what you shared today. You are afraid of overeating as a result of not drinking--this is a thought that sidetracks you from fully concentrating on sobriety. And I mean SOBRIETY, not ABSTAINING. I didn't understand the difference at first, but there is a big one. At first I was an abstaining drunk, waiting for things to calm down a little until I could sneak "just one drink" and end up drunk.
Now I know that that thought is a lie and today (and only today as far as we know) I am an alcoholic in recovery, practicing sobriety and a way of life that frees me from fears and angry acting out.
The other thing you said is that you are reflecting on the unmanagebility of your life by writing about your drinking and the paths you have followed. That's great and I think we could all benefit from this. BUT....you say your husband is "making you do this." You've got to do any and everything you can to get sober and stay that way because you want to. I hope and pray that there's no resentment building inside of you because you don't really want to write all of your past down. You simply might not be ready to confront the whole pie in such a short time.
Today's the day to work on; the past can always wait because it's gone. And again, you'll be much better served by the fellowship of an AA group than by someone like me 1,500 miles away talking to you on today's equivilent of a teletype. Fear of going is natural, and it's the same as jumping off the high diving board the first time or summoning the courage to say "no, you're wrong" to an a__ of a bullying boss for the first time. You will feel much relieved after your first couple of meetings.
Please, Susan, count yourself lucky to be trying to end the lies. Go out and share your pain and determination to change with live people who you can call and talk to and have coffe with. Gain from their strength and love.
Your husband seems to support you and that's a huge plus too. Hang in there and succeed! You can have the life we have, it's a "promise"! Will R.
Member: Phil H
Location: New Hampshire
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 15:14:59
Im sorry for taking up time, I will be brief. Janet S you dont have to worry about us finding you out, we already know. Go to a meeting!!!
Peace
Phil.........
Member: Phil H
Location: New Hampshire
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 15:22:23
Im Phil and I am an Alcoholic, I neglected to say that in my previous correspondence. Forgive me please as I am new at this www thing. Peace
Phil........
Member: Janet S
Location: PA
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 16:33:03
Two things: Phil, please don't make me paranoid that you know who I am or I won't come back. This is all I have got right now.
Will, Thanks. I see what you mean, but, I have been sitting here writing, crying, writing, and I am actually seeing alot about myself. Maybe in time I will see more, that is a good thing. If I don't write this paper for him, he will leave me. I love him, we have been together for 16 years, married 13yrs. Have you had this type of relationship. It is to much to throw away. Thanks for your thoughts, I did take them in with alot of thought. Till tomorrow.......
Member: Rich B.
Location: East Coast, USA
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 16:47:40
When I went to my first meeting, I had no clue what to expect. I hadn't any knowledge of any AA literature, nevermind that there were promises. All I wanted to do was find some way to stop drinking, everything I tried on my own didn't work. When I got there I met some really great people. They told me that if I didn't pickup the first drink I couldn't get drunk, and that I never had to feel that way again. They were right, that was 7 years ago. I have not had to drink nor feel that way again, and that's all I was looking for, anything else is an extra. The extra's and the rest of the promises have been happening to me throughout my sobriety, but only if I make myself available for them to happen. That is by going to plenty of meetings, having a sponser,and having a conscience contact with God as I understand him. God and the good people of AA have helped me to do what I could not do for myself. And that was to stop drinking. They told me to do what they did, and the people before them did, and I would not drink. And that's all I was looking for.
Member: oldtimer
Location:
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 18:37:09
Janet they do not know aa. Read the coffeepot they want you to have to start posting by your real first name and then they ask for an email address.Please come to a meeting, do not get involved with cyberspace aa.I call myself oldtimer because thats what some of the younger people of aa nicknamed me and they donot feel that is sufficent amount of info.
Member: Jim B.
Location: Bethel,ME.
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 20:37:19
I had to write two boxes (over 1000 pages) and then I picked up. Might as well get it out of your system. Thank God I am in AA once again, second time around. I am a drunk recovering one day at a time THROUGH the program. No more of that getting into my own head bull for me. Sucks. Peace.
Member: sandy s
Location: jax florida
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 21:09:19
hello everyone my name is sandy i am an alcoholic, a very blessed one today thanks to this program God and all the fellowship i have in aa. the topic of the promises, the promises we read pg 84-85 are only a few that will be recieved as we grow and for me that is the best part i look forward today to what can be fullfilled if i work for it and that is the key word to staying sobber for me if i work as hard to live these 12 steps as a part of daily life as i did to stay drunk then it works. today it is a lifestyle that i live and to practice 10,11,12 to the best of my ability everyday. working with others is only a portian of the rewards that i get. thanks for letting me share tonite. God Bless
Member: sandy s
Location: jax florida
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 21:26:56
sandy again, alcoholic, janet oldtimer is right just get yourself to a meeting the worst thing than can happen is you get yourself back, because you are the only one you can do this for you can't do it for any one else. there is no better feeling than to walk into a meeting and feel the warmth and acceptence of another alcoholic. if you are truly an alcoholic than only you know that, and we are all alike none of are any diferent that the other only our stories vary as well as the bottoms we have hit that make us finally realize we are powerless and that our lives have become unmanagable and that we do not want to live that way anymore. it is a rigorous program based on our ability to be honest. don't be afraid just look in the phone book find a group and go to a meeting you will be truly amazed. hang in there janet, you'll be in my prayers.
Member: jim w
Location: pa
Date: 06 Mar 1999
Time: 22:03:09
hi jim alcoholic. what phil is trying to say Janet S. is the people that matter in your life are acutely aware of your problem. Yes, I know, I didn't think so either but guess what, wrong again. this program works it has changed my life good luck god bless
Member: david
Location: L.V. New Mexico
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 01:19:02
I have been a member for some time now, I have done alot of stupid things since getting sober, yet no matter what I did not take a drink, I learned early on to pray, read the book and share with others. to this day it seems to be working, i enjoy getting up in the morning and making my bed.thank you all for being there for me.
Member: michele b
Location: rock springs, wyoming
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 02:10:36
Hi Everyone i am alcoholic named michele b. i accidenty came across this site.i am 5 months sober.i came to the program on march 7, 1998, i remember that day clearly, i was sick and tired of being sick and tired.alcohol wasn't working for me like it use too. i was ready for something, somebody, to help me with my desperate condition. today it is only by the grace of my HP and the people in those rooms that i am sober.i was told early on in order to be truly grateful,i needed to involve myself with service work so i made myself avalible, i am giving back to the group what came unconditionaly to me. except one condition, the desire to stop drinking. that statment there makes me or anyone of us a member of this awesome program. i am from a group that keeps to the steps and traditions we have many old timers with years of sobriety i watch how they live, i ask question, i pick up that 500 pound phone, i try to put no conditions on my sobriety. it takes what it takes not to pick up that first drink and keep coming to meetings. i have a long ways to go and i'm in no hurry.i can't,god can. i think i'll let him. turn it over.thank you everyone.
Member: dj
Location: norfolk
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 02:56:31
hi all,!! old alkie here, janet s aa would be long gon if thair was easer softer way, that we all we all looked for. i tryed to quit a soon as started drinking and all,need something out side of me it was hp
god bless
Member: Ian W
Location: Vic Australia
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 05:37:39
Hello my name is Ian and I am a very grateful alcoholic. I have been sober now for 8 years and most of the promises have come true. There is a member here that says that he has a new life and not the old life polished up. I find this to be true. There is no way that i wish to return to the Hell that used to be my life. Hope you all hang in there as sobriety is worth the initial pain. It definitely gets better.
Member: John.L
Location: Delaware
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 07:40:20
Hi my name is John.L i'm a alcoholic!!!! i was wonder if we could talk about being a begginer in AA,the does and don'ts.things that helped you "old timers".like going to meetings and getting a sponsor.there's alot we could learn from you,cause i don't know about anyone else,but i'm stupid!!and i like it that way!that way i can remain teachable.
i only have a little over 8months that is why i picked this topic!besides i noticed last week alot of new people coming in."online" so if not begginers can we discuss the first step!!! "We admitted we where powerless over alcohol- that are lives had become unmanageable." either way thanks for reading this it lets me know i'm not alone today,to beable to share with so many people!!!signed:John.L//Delaware
Member: Tony
Location: Correctional Facility USA
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 09:32:15
Exsessive mental activity does not equal thinking
I don't know how this works, but it does.
One of my blocks to recovery has been to much intellectual nonsense.
The only meetings I can get to in this prison are on line.
I am grateful that God has not wrought I as a lawyer!
Thank you for this meeting
Member: EfrainS.
Location: New York City
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 09:56:21
Hello Everyone! My name is Efrain. I am dual addicted. I have been in the fellowship since January. Today I make 37 days clean. I have a sponsor and a home group. There is a big concern, though. I hardly see my sponsor or talk with him. He only sees me on Mondays and Wednesdays (meeting days) at our group. I try to call him often but most of the time he is not home. I feel the need for that someone to be there for me when needed. Any suggestions? Thanks everyone for listening.
Member: MICHELLE C
Location: KINGSLAND GA
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 09:58:55
HELLO ALL! MICHELLE C here. I cant believe im at 21 days clean and sober.I really must thank you all,for all your support.Finally getting to f2f meetings. Picked up my white chip Thurs.(scarry)but it seems worth it. If sobriety gives me a life of some kind.I will be graetful.I havent been living life, only escaping from it. I'm missing so much out of life.
I just wanted to encourage anyone new.Try it what have you got to loose.Everything to gain. GOD BLESS YOU ALL. tHANKS FOR ALL SUPPORT. ANY COMMENTS...feel free to contact me imgeminii666@yahoo.com. or icq me 30627979
Member: jim r.
Location: salem,ma
Date: 07 Mar 1999
Time: 10:52:10
tony in correctional facility usa central service can give you information on aa's instatution commity in your area you may be able to get regular comitments inside good luck jim r.