Member: john
Location: washington
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 8:28:22 AM

Comments

Courage to change the things I can is somthing I need help with. I started a business i dislike and I am in a marriage that brings me pain. I do not have the courage to let go of the business ( ie the money) and I cannot take on our marriage problems. My sponsor used to say my marriage is fine - I am the problem and that is what I should be working on. How do you make the tough decisions and find the courage to execute them?


Member: Landscape Ray
Location: scotland
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 11:15:33 AM

Comments

Hi John your Marriage why dont you try an take councilling maybe it will see if you are to blame ! i have a business and i like running it, if i came to the day i didnt I would get someone else to run it and try something else it would still bring you money in.We have to sometimes stand fast and not run away from our fears John, you are going to have to make a decision no matter what you do! Ill pray you make the right one John , have courage Regards Ray


Member: Bonny G.
Location: Hot Springs, AR
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 11:26:19 AM

Comments

Bonny, grateful recoverying alcoholic. Prayer is my answer to situations I cannot change. I ask God to direction my actions so that I may be of use to "OTHERS," out of me and into you. I find that whether it is my job, or a family problem, if I direct my attention off of "my" feelings and into the "other person, place or thing," I do a better job all the way around. Just because I am sober, it doesn't mean that "all" my actions are in a good place. I need the help of a sponsor or trusted adviser to help me keep my actions towards "others" in a balance. My sponsor advises me to "Write it down on paper. It's different in writing than it is in my head." I find that she is right. I'm glad you brought up the topic John, because I need reminders on occassions. My suggestion to you is this: (1)Treat your wife as you wish to be treated, don't be angry if you are the one "doing all the right things." (2) Ask yourself if the problems are of your making or hers? Put it on paper, do a 4th Step on it. Is her reaction a result of something you did? (3) Why did you start the business? Was it for money or prestige? Can you live without it and still not drink? Support your family? What exactly do you like about the business? (4)Make a gratitude list on both the business and your wife. (5) Ask God, as you understand Him, to direct your actions in both situations. Thanks for allowing me to share on this topic of acceptance, I need always to remember that just because I am sober, I don't have the right to "expect everything to go my way now."


Member: sonia
Location: uk
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 12:20:29 PM

Comments

The courage to change the Things I can. Its difficult because i lack courage many times, the reason i dont work to some degree is lack of courage. But then not working helped me find my identity as a person, not as job description. I cant tell you how to decide if it is something that requires action. I tend to fall back on honesty quite a lot in relationships with people. If i am in a relationship that i dont like, i dont think i am doing the person any favours by staying with them, they might have a soul mate somewhere. I might have one to. I guessi have high ideals when it come to partners, hence i am still single two and half years into sobriety. A lot come down to askingmyself "what can i do today about my problems" I do what i can do today, that might change things and have an effect on how i see the problem. Like today you posted about the problem. I can never be sure if ia m forcing something or using courage, i try to accept that, and so i look at intent a lot. I am babbling, so i will shut up. sonia


Member: marv l
Location: laurel,ms
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 12:57:45 PM

Comments

Hi,I"m Marv L,recovering alcoholic. John,your reference to a sponsor likely means you,too,are a member of AA;maybe you have read in our book that "wife or no wife,job or no job,our sobriety does not depend on these things." Like you,I have struggled with the idea of changing things,but courage is also needed to take the long view,and its amazing how things improve when we stop trying to manage.If our fellowship ever became a school for developing coping skills re jobs,relationships, and being strongly assertive,I guess we could call it "Assertives Anonymous!" Heard of a fella who returned home, after attending a class on assertiveness,loudly told his wife: "Go run me a bath, lay out some casual clothes,,fix my favorite dinner,--uh,oh,yeah,when I"m finished with my bath,ya know who"s gonna dress me???" She replied"Ummm--,maybe the UNDERTAKER!!" Thanks for sharing,and for helpng me stay sober today! ((Hugs to all!))


Member: Bob F.
Location: Wisconsin
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 1:22:53 PM

Comments

My name is Bob I am an alcoholic, Bob F. Wisconsin. John-- the big book tells our method of travel on the road to happy detiny is to ''trudge''. and I think some times we simply have to put one foot in front of another and just keep plodding along till we get things figured out. I don't know what you want but more importently right now I don't think you do either. Hang in there, use the serenety prayer often and hope for the best.----good luck bob


Member: AZbill
Location: From AZbill
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 4:08:24 PM

Comments

Hi. Bill here. Alcoholic from Arizona. The immediate thought as I was reading your post John, was the Serenity Prayer. In that prayer, all I am doing is asking the God of my understanding to help me differentiate between What I can work on, ("Courage to change the things I can") And what I have to turn over, ("Accept the things I cannot change"). Marriages, jobs, businesses are all outside issues; however, I have found that the longer I stay sober the longer I am finding out that this is a "start living" program as much as it is a "stop drinking" program. In my recovery, I have quit two jobs, got fired from one, and one company closed on me. In one of the jobs I quit, I was faced with the possibility of having to pay back a 6000 dollar finders fee. It never happened. Good things happen when we do the right things for the right reasons. Sooo.. If you are having marital problems see a Marriage Counselor, Work problems? Read the want ads. If you are going to drink over this, talk to your sponsors. I have also found and believe, that God will do for me what I cannot do for myself. It is one of our promises. I also believe just as strongly that He will not do for me what I can. Bill az-bill@mindspring.com


Member: Joy V.
Location: Arizona
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 4:28:49 PM

Comments

Greetings all and I hope you are have a blessed and sober day. For me these days "courage to change the things I can" speaks to confronting those issues and people that I need it and not isolating or hiding my head in the sand. If left to my own devices my tendency is to let things slide. I've fortunately learned that if I don't confront something in the first round it's still there in the second and so on. Plus, the lesson gets tougher each time, so I might as well deal with it up front. I've led much of my life ruled by self-centered fear. The courage I get from God and working the steps in this program have helped me make tremendous progress in this area. I still backslide sometimes, but I get back up and go at it again. The more deeply I trust God the more courage I have knowing He is with me every step of the way and will help me do and say what is needed. Thanks for "listening"!


Member: Robert
Location: Columbus, OH.
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 4:42:05 PM

Comments

Robert - alcoholic. I find that if I write things down, just like I did in my 4th step, I can gain perspective. Sometimes I have to write down my priorities, what is important to me, and then set (in writing) realistic goals and expectations. I try to challenge myself while still keeping things realistic. And, if these goals affect others, then I let them in on it so they can be a positive influence on what I am doing, and then they have realistic expectations as well. Robert www.alcoholrecovery.net


Member: David W
Location: NJ
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 6:20:54 PM

Comments

Hi I'm David, I am grateful for AA and my Higher Power for keeping me sober. I am finding the courage to change by working the steps with a sponsor according to the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. Without changing my thinking, my actions are the same as they used to be (even without drinking)-- real change for me is possible when I take a detailed inventory, work with a sponsor to see the exact nature of my wrongs, pray for the willingness to be rid of the things that are blocking me. On a daily basis, I ask God for the strength to replace my defects with positive traits. When I get unblocked (or get spiritually fit), my fears, my anger (rage), resentments fall away and I find I have courage to do things that I couldn't do before -- i listen for a quiet voice within to show me the way. If some things are still too dificult to change I am told to continue pray for the willingness --it will come. Specific directions for the steps are in the Big Book. The program is simple if we find someone that has been through the work in the Big Book and they take us through it. I spent years in AA, without going through all the steps and I didn't change enough to be happy --now I am doing the work as outlined in the basic text of the program -the AA program in the Big Book works. Thanks for the topic and all the shares.


Member: Rita F
Location: Indiana
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 6:21:56 PM

Comments

Hi family! Rita alcoholic here, I like the idea of telling on your disease. They say in the rooms that this is a dis---ease, and fear means forget everything and run. But having the courage that you will receive from your higher power turns fear on its ear and becomes, forgive everyone and recover. Thanks for letting me share, and thank you oh so much for being here when I need you!! P.S. I have a husband who is a non drinker who does not go to alanon, but my recovery does not depend on him going or not going, understanding my disease or not. My recovery depends on the things that I do, don't drink,read the big book, call you sponser, work the steps, and go to meetings. Your on the right track!!


Member: Kim V
Location: kvaughn@madison.main.nc.us
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 6:31:37 PM

Comments

Kim V here alcoholic, John great topic, courage to change. I have read some great things in the posts, as far as doing 4th step work, being useful to others by getting out of ones self, pray, marriage counsling etc.. But I am going to focus more on "Courage to change the difference" which is ACCEPTANCE. So going to the Big Book new addition P. 417 ' "Accepatance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am distrubed, it is because I find some person, place or thing, or situation-some fact of life-unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place or thing or siutuation as being exactly the way it is suppose to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's term, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and Kim Vin my attitudes. So John hang in there and keep doing the next right thing. Thanks for being here.


Member: Mike H
Location: Philadelphia PA
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 7:40:04 PM

Comments

Hi everybody. Mike H here, This is my first time at an online meeting. I'm really glad I found this site. It's snowing like crazy here in Philly and I needed a meeting. This is such a good topic too.. I can relate to what you are going through John. Last year in october I had to make a tough decision about the relationship I was in. I was full of fear and uncertainty, yet I knew something had to change. I prayed about it for months, just waiting for the right answer to come. I inventoried the situation and found where I had been at fault and what needed to be changed in me. When changing my attitude didn't help, I had to let her go. I loved her very much and still do, but the bottom line was that our relationship was not going to work. My sponsor told me that sometimes the best thing I can do for someone I love is let them go their own way. As doubtfull as I was, I let her go and it has worked out for the best. I concentrated harder on helping others and within a few months I was feeling better than I had in a long time.


Member: Greg G.
Location: Michigan
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 7:40:54 PM

Comments

Hi All: Greg G. alcoholic from Michigan. I've found that the most important thing that I've gained from the program has been the ability to be honest with myself as well as all those around me. This has had it's problems, but all in all has made my life without drink very managable. I used to avoid problems in my marriage by ignoring them or saying what my spouse wanted to hear to avoid conflict. This just didn't work in the long run. It was a short term fix that left me feeling hollow and defeated. Being honest sometimes causes conflict, but more often creates dialogue. If you honestly can't make the marriage comfortable for both partners, it might be time to go your separate ways. Counciling might be tried first since you can only control your own honesty. The problem may be with your spouse. The job is another story. Whether you are the employer or employee makes a big difference. As someone earlier said; possibly having someone else run the business might be a solution. Only you can make the decision as to how important it is. Personally, to die a drunk millionaire in a loveless marriage isn't the legacy I wish to leave behind. Stay sober and honest. Good things will follow.


Member: Helen W.
Location: Delaware
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 8:05:19 PM

Comments

Courage to change is a great topic. First I have to figure out what I'm supposed to be trying to change vs. what I should be trying to accept. That's the really hard part, the deciding, the wisdom to know.... I have to be careful that I'm changing something that really needs to be changed and it's not just a case of the grass looking greener on the other side of the fence. Sometimes NOT making a decision is deciding, at least for now. I can remember when first struggling to get sober, being in total chaos about leaving my live-in boyfriend of nine years. I packed the car and unpacked it no less than once a month. "There was a certain sense of security in the familiar." People said not to make any major changes in the first year and then in the next breath they said I had to change everything. But I was so afraid of being alone. It was only when I became willing to go to any length to stay sober that I was able to summon the courage to go. It wasn't easy, in fact, it was extremely painful, but it was the turning point for me. No one else could tell me what I should do; I had to decide for myself when I was ready. "To thine own self be true."


Member: RAY T
Location: LONG ISL NY
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 8:14:33 PM

Comments

hI MY NAME IS RAY AND IAM AN ALCOHOLIC AND A DRUG ADDICT I LET A GIRL AFTER 3 YEARS WHEN I HAD 2YEARS OF SOBRIEWTY IT SHOULD HAVE ENDED AFTER 1 YEAR BUT SHE STAYED WITH ME THROUGH MY ADDICTION SO I FELT SHE DESEAVED THE SAMEI MET THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS A WEEK LATER BUT YOU HAVE TO BE OUT GOING WHICH I NEVER WAS WHEN I WAS USING


Member: Maggie
Location: il
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 9:00:15 PM

Comments

Hi, maggie here. Alcoholic. GREAT topic for me today.The courage to change the things I can and to accept the things I cannot change is the order I went in today. I decided to help a friend today, thinking I was changing my selfish attitude and ended up sending her away in an ambulance because she was so dangerously intoxicated. I realized after it was all over that it wasn't me trying to "get out of my selfish attitude", It was me doing what sobriety has tought me. This girl needed a ride to a meeting, I didn't hesitate t say yes. As I chaired the meeting she got up several times to go to the bathroom which wasn't really even noticable until she stumbled into her chair. I looked over at her and she was stone drunk. After the meeting I had decided to take her home until several of us realized she was more than just "drunk", her 80lb. body was saturated with alcohol. My old behavior told me to jump in and take charge and my new behavior told me no matter what I did I could not make things better, I had to accept I COULD NOT CHANGE THE SITUATION, it was out of my control, she needed medical help. Thanks to my Higher power and the fellowship of A.A., I am now able to say A prayer for her. God bless all! Maggie


Member: Lisa K
Location: Michigan
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 10:29:53 PM

Comments

Hi All! Lisa here, recovering alcoholic in michigan. My favorite topic...The courage to change... sobriety is all about change and acceptance of the things we CANT change. the wisdom to change what we can is where my higher power comes in. I pray for courage and wisdom everyday! when issues come up that anger me or are too much for me I find peace in knowing I dont HAVE to carry the world and its problems on my shoulders anymore! I drank to solve everybodys problems and I choose sobriety and serenity in my life today. I bought a serenity prayer bracelet to remind me daily of the things I cannot change. I have a peace now that Ive never had.thanks to AA and my higher power. Thank you all for being here and letting me share!


Member: RANI B.
Location: HAGERSTOWN, MD
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 10:42:14 PM

Comments

HI..IT'S RANI AND I AM A GRATEFUL ALCOHOLIC...COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN...THAT'S THE KEY FOR ME "THE THINGS I CAN," NOT THE THINGS I WANT TO..I WANT TO HAVE CONTROL OVER PEOPLE AND HAVE THEM DO WHAT I WANT THEM TO, BUT REALITY IS I DON'T...HERE'S A SHOCKER, SOMETIMES I ACT OUT OF MY OWN SELFISHNESS WITHOUT THINKING OF WHAT THE OTHER PERSON MAY WANT OR NEED...PRAYING AND UTILIZING THE SERENITY PRAYER ARE VERY HELPFUL TO ME..ALSO, SO IS RECOGNIZING WHAT MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ARE AND NOT ACTING IMPULSIVELY WHEN THINGS DO NOT GO MY WAY ARE MAJOR KEYS IN LIVING ONE DAY AT A TIME....AND HEALTHY..THANKS FOR ALLOWING ME TO SHARE.


Member: Barb L.
Location:
Date: 2/16/2003
Time: 11:13:35 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm an alcoholic from Wyoming named Barb. I guess what comes to mind is how much we and also our relationships change when we get sober. We have to completely get to know our families again. We are different people when we're sober and may need counseling to figure out that "living life" thing. Maybe you'll like each other, maybe you won't, that's where the acceptance and courage to change comes in. Another thing I think about with your situation is how many times I've wondered about and thought "what is Gods' will for me?" I finally decided, does it really matter that I know? It may come to me easily sometimes but for some peace, all I need to know is that God's will for me is to stay sober and things will work out as they are supposed to.


Member: Katie G.
Location: Maryland
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 12:43:58 AM

Comments

Hello all! My name is Katie and I am a alcoholic , only thing is I just realized it about a week and a half ago.I had been drinking for about 9 years before this. I feel pretty good, I have more strength but I'm a little cranky. I feel that will pass in time. You see a 2 weeks ago I had a major accident by falling asleep at the wheel ( Must I tell you I had been drinking ) after that accident I felt terrible, I couldn't get in a car, didn't want to talk to anybody. I found help in my state (Maryland)to go to an outpatient recovery program. I am very happy to be alive right now and not in a hopital just banged up alittle. As I came on to this web site I think it was the 12x12 room I went into and they said Live and Let Live! Looking back I could have killed myself, the two passengers in the other car and anybody else on that road. I feel lucky I just got the chance to celebrate my 23rd birthday sober Feb. 14,2003 and able to celebrate the rest of my life. Well thanks for letting me share and god bless all!


Member: Tom T
Location: Central NY
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 12:53:48 AM

Comments

Hi all, my name is tom and i'm an alcoholic.my friend says "either it will or it won't and after it has we will know if it did or it didn't." one of the greatest gifts i have recieved is the ability to turn it over to my higher power.my earlyest episode of turning it over were first experienced at my homegroup.the same night that i joined. keith said to me," you joined just in time, we are all changing jobs, and you can be the archivist." now i had heard in AA you don't say no but i have to tell you that the excuses started flying through my head as to why i could not do that job. I actually didn't have one legitament reason that I couldn't. you see those reasons were all the things that might happen, not one of them were things that I could say would actually happen. just as my sponser had told me, I had no faith! I started to practice the third step. I ask God to relieve me of the burden of self when i have to make those decisions, I ask that thy will be done, not mine. since that time i have had nine jobs in AA, I never wanted a one of them. in fact when we were electing our DCM I was voting against myself in an effort to get out of a job. the vote went to the hat and i wound up the new DCM. It was OK. It was Gods will not mine. That third step works outside of AA as well. 2 1/2 years ago I was faced with a similar job related situation. I felt that i had to change, but how could i. the money was too good. I had an opertunity to go back to school, but how would i pay the bills? I talked with my sponser and others in the program. the concensus was "turn it over". You see, I just knew that when I told my boss that I was going back to school full time that he would tell me that I was done. I did some calculations and found that i could get by on as little as $150 per week.I felt that I could manage enough part time work to earn that. When the day came I told my boss he asked, "how will you pay your bills?" I told him I would have to work less hours for more money.(thinking i would get another job) he said "I'm not paying you more money! I still work at the same place and have had two raises since then. The point is, untill I could accept the fact that i didn't have to like the outcome I wouldn't make a move. It was the same with not drinking. I just knew that I wouldn't like it so I couldn't try it. To-day I wouldn't trade it for love nor money Another thing my sponser shared was to pray to my God to remove the fear. I have had success with that also. Gods speed John, Just don't drink today, it's not worth it.


Member: thomas
Location: fla
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 6:01:28 AM

Comments

thomas here. Alkie from florida. welcome katie, keep coming back and try sitting in on early sobriety page. good luck. have a great and sober 24 all.


Member: Charlie Darling
Location: Ft Myers via Key West FL
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 7:30:11 AM

Comments

Good Morning Family Charlie Darling a very grateful recovering alcholic. Great topic, as when I came into the rooms I did not want to change what I thought was a great life and fun, but now after almost 6 yrs on 3/1 I find I like the changes, and there as been many in my few years. I had been envolved almost 19 yrs, when I sought AA, as my life had become unmanagable, and we argued, and faught alot, and I thought this has got to end, and through the program of AA and my higher power Ifound what I needed, and I had to accept myself, and try not to control people. This yr my partner and I will be celebrating 25 yrs, not all good, and not all bad. But AA has done for me what I could not do for myself. ACCEPTANCE is the key in all my situations. Thank you family for helping me through another 24 hrs. I Love You ALL Charlie kwduke_1999@yahoo.com


Member: Liz S.
Location: france/florida
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 9:19:55 AM

Comments

hi all, i'm liz, alchoholic from paris, france now in florida: great topic for the week and one i really need to hear about now. the second part of the serenity prayer: the courage to change the things i can, always a good one. basically, it's taken me a while and on occasion is still a struggle to remember that the ONLY thing(s) i can change is ME, Myself and I. - and my attitude toward anyone/anyplace/anything outside me own self. writing it all down is good, asking for help even better, trying to find an answer from the Powers that Be, whatever works .....and as for Courage, it is always a good thing for me to be reminded that courage is going outside your comfort zone to get to a better place. not the lack of fear, but taking action in spite of fear and having Faith that it is the right thing to do, say or be. have a wonderful 24 to everybody, and to those getting beat up by Father Winter this year up North, stay warm!


Member: Pete H.
Location: AZ
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 9:59:58 AM

Comments

Hi everyone,my name is Pete, and I'm an alocholic. Thanks for the topic John. I just wanted to share with you the other version of the serenity prayer that I learned years ago. It goes; "GOD grant me the serenity to accept the person I cannot change, the courage to change the person I can, and the wisdom to know it's ME". Hope this might help in your search for the answer. Love to all. I remain yours in sobriety,Pete


Member: LYNDA B
Location: DEVON UK
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 10:12:23 AM

Comments

Hello again from DEVON..Thanks you all for your shares..courage to change the things we can..AND WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE..just gotta keep it simple..it takes courage to face our fears courage to accept the things we cannot change,courage to go forward without booze or any other drugs,courage to listen and learn,go to meetings,live the steps,trust in people,do whats suggested..when sometimes our illness is screaming for a fix..to deny it and live in the precious present with new faith and hope..handing over to and A HIGHER POWER AND TRUSTING..EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK!!!THINGS WILL HAPPEN BEYOUND OUR WILDEST DREAMS..SOMETIMES QUICKLY SOMETIMES SLOWLY..WE JUST GOTTA STICK WITH IT..IT DOES GET BETTER..LOVE TO YOU ALL X BLESS.


Member: Iris O.
Location:
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 11:48:26 AM

Comments

I stayed in a marriage that was not healthy because I thought I could change things. At night I would pray to God for guidance and I would hear him say "go", but I thought that would be giving up. Finally I had to leave. If I had taken God's advice earlier it would have prevented much suffering for myself and others. Today I see that God's will for me is often a pleasant sensible route.


Member: Kelly B.
Location: Sterling, VA
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 11:59:59 AM

Comments

HI Kelly, alcoholic from VA. Snowed in here and can't get to a meeting. Facing charges on a 2nd dui and have no car or license. i have a boyfriend, going on 10 mos. willing to stick by me through my recovery becasue we both want a life together. He has said if this happens again, he will leave me for good. I have made a commitment to never drink again and go to AA and recover. i have a great sponsor and a 7 yr old daughter. I didn't realize how this disease could sneak up on you especially since I really wasn't drinking heavily until about 7 mos ago. I know my sobriety comes first but can someone tell me that I don't have to let my dear boyfriend go over this? He is trying to learn all he can about it. He doesn't drink so he doesn't know alot. I love him very much. We are both not religious although I do believe in God and can draw strength from him. I have finally found the man I want to spend my life with. Feel free to write me: icucula@yahoo.com


Member: Janice C.
Location: Kinsman, Ohio
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 12:19:48 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Janice and I'm an alcoholic. When I first got sober, I absolutely hated my job. I complained constantly about it. After about 3 months of this, someone said to me, "There's a second part to the serenity prayer, the courage to change the things I can, and I wish you'd do something about it." I was devastated!!! But he was right. I prayed about it and three days later I had a new job. I know that you shouldn't make a major decision for a year but I talked to my sponsor and she is the one who got me the job and it was working with her. Besides getting sober, it was one of the best things that I ever did. I will always be grateful for the man who told me that. Someone also told me to pray for courage. And that the courage won't come a minute before, a second before, but right at the exact moment that I need it. This has helped me so many times. Thanks for listening.


Member: siobhan c.
Location: washington
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 1:35:58 PM

Comments

hi there. siobhan, alcoholic. 'courage to change the things i can' means, to me, not just my situation but my attitude about whatever is troubling me. i also believe i have to take responsibility for my own happiness, just like my sobriety. if i am unhappy, it's not anyone elses responsibility to fix my life. it is up to me to work for my happiness, to change things in my life that are making me unhappy. easier said than done, i know. but then, nothing worth doing is easy, and if it's worth doing, it's worth working hard to achieve. sometimes it's as simple as letting go of little resentments about other people. although, most often, like in recovery, it requires an entire overhaul in your life. i just keep telling myself 'no one is going to lose sleep over my unhappiness but me - the only person who is going to suffer is me'. thanks for letting me share.


Member: Melanie
Location: Winter wonderland, Ohio
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 1:39:14 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Melanie an alcoholic. KELLY B. It sounds like your boyfriend is FOR you, not AGAINST you in sobriety. So why would you have to leave him? You are blessed, give thanks. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change." I ask myself, "Can I change it?" If not, oh well! I don't have to like it, but I have to accept that dwelling on the negative, arguing, exerting all my will does no good. I can't change that I need money to live a comfortable life. I cannot change my husband. "The courage to change the things I can." I can change my attitudes and actions. I never could make my husband a better spouse. "How can I be a better wife today?" When I try to be a loving spouse and see his point of view and not lash out in anger, I usually find I get a better response from him. I can change my attitude at work. What do I like about my job, why did I choose this profession, what can I do today to find a new career? (always today...update my resume?) "And the wisdom to know the difference." External factors are always beyond my control. I CAN change my actions, attitudes and maybe external factors will follow. I have changed careers in sobriety. I'm happier and make more money. I have not changed spouses. When I got better, HE got better. We are happier than we've ever been.It doesn't work that way for everyone, but have faith and work on YOU and God will guide you. Love and blessings to YOU!


Member: Rich P
Location: Woburn MA later this week
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 3:52:56 PM

Comments

Does anyone know where I can find the list of AA meetings for Woburn, MA? I found a few by searching for "Boston and AA". I know I can just call the number in the phone book when I get there, but would like a list of meetings asap. Peace


Member: Jeff S
Location: San Pedro
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 5:22:10 PM

Comments

Well here is my first post ever. I have returned to using alcohol to combat Insomnia. Bad Idea, I know. It all came to a head when I made a fool of myself infront of the family. Time to return to sobriety. I am resetting the counter to day one.


Member: Karen A.
Location: CA
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 6:51:03 PM

Comments

This is my first time in..."Hi" everyone. I have been in recovery for 9 months and have been enjoying my sobriety very much. Yes, acceptance is a good topic. But can be tough. It is sometimes difficult to pull ourselves out of "mental quagmires" that form in our heads. In the last 9 months, I have learned that life is short and that I need to take care of myself. Time on this earth is precious. When I have issues that need to be addressed, I take some "me" time and assess the situation. I write out lists of possible solutions, put it aside to let my sub-conscience work on it for a bit and then make my decisions on what to do. Sometimes, I look to my supporters/higher power for guidence as well but in the end, I am the one who has to live with the consequences of my actions. Not every decision I have made has worked out the way I wanted but I have felt good about the work that I put into making the decision and have felt good about myself. Thank you to all for your contributions and Good Luck John!


Member: Jo R
Location: australia
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 9:19:11 PM

Comments

Hi every-body! This is my first time here and Iam an alcoholic.Can I please have some advice on viewing marriage with another alcocholic? We love each other very much but are having fights over drinking.We have tried to limit our drinking to no avail and are now talking about no drinking at all. I desperatly need some feed-back.Also I have had councellling .Thanks,jo


Member: Bill S
Location: Iowa
Date: 2/17/2003
Time: 10:34:20 PM

Comments

Hi John- I don't have any answers for your problems but I am praying that you and your HP can work them out. Thank you Pete H. for your version of the serenity prayer It tells me what I have to work on. Thank you all for being my friend!! Bill


Member: miles and miles of little brown piles
Location: uranus
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 2:26:28 AM

Comments

Pull your head out of your ass and smell the world around you instead.


Member: miles and miles of little brown piles
Location: uranus
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 2:26:51 AM

Comments

Pull your head out of your ass and smell the world around you instead.


Member: Landscape Ray
Location: scotland
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 4:40:11 AM

Comments

Welcome (((Jeff))) (((Karen))) (((Joe))) you just answer`d your own question buddy dont drink get to meets and maybe the rows will stop! down to you good luck! Regards Ray


Member: Bob B
Location: Vanderbilt Mi
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 5:45:52 AM

Comments

Bob, alcoholic. The 4th step is about a "moral" inventory. Dictionary I have says it is the motive for what I do, my reason for action or inaction, my values which are all based on my belief system. If I am not content, I am responsible but if I am sane, I want to know why I have made the choices that cause me and others pain. I hear John telling my story of years ago, making the same mistakes, wanting to fill an empty life and not having a clue what it takes to furnish a contented life so I grab what is available, never stopping to look at the consequences or rewards BEFORE I choose. If I don't take the time to look at me under a microscope and all that I do/think/believe/feel/choose, then I am sure to repeat it since the same idiot I hired to do these things is still in office of management of my life.


Member: Kathleen
Location: Florida
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 9:24:02 AM

Comments

Courage to change... Hello all, KAthleen alcoholic in Florida. I was married to an active alcoholic when I got sober and stayed with him for 3 years thinking he would change..lol Being an alcoholic myself I should have known better. We divorced and I saturated myself with AA, went back to school, am in a profession I love and the promises do come true. I like what whoever is was that said we have to put one foot in front of the other and "trudge" the road. Very true and sometimes life seems to put things in our life that are unsurmountable but just by keeping my focus in today and trying to do the next right thing, life seems to change for the better. Really it is me that changed as a result of the steps, but just hang in there, go to meetings, work with your sponser, and do the steps and life goes on.. Kathleen


Member: Craig L (Dogmanor@yahoo.com)
Location: Aloha, Oregon
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 10:32:46 AM

Comments

Early in sobriety I often stressed about what action I should take about a given situation, often around the job or relationships. There I was with a brain damaged by alcohol, trying to think and make decisions about things which may or may not be real. Early in life I found myself in a profession I hated. I spent many years believing I would be happy if I could only get into a job more suited to my temprament. The alcohol and drugs fueled the fire of fantasies about my "perfect life". Somehow with all my screwing up, I managed to keep working in that hated profession. I was terrified to be without the money to keep feeding my addictions. Today, I love my job (still the same profession). Once I got sober and I began doing the steps of AA, it took courage for me to admit I was wrong. God always responds to prayer. If the "next right thing" is not crystal clear (eg: a pink slip), then the best action may be no action for now, meanwhile I keep the squirrel in my head busy doing the things I can know are always right; Compassion and Helping others.


Member: Gina B
Location: Long Beach Calif.
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 11:02:32 AM

Comments

Hi, my name is Gina B alcoholic, I have found that the principle of courage goes hand in hand with the principle of faith. I myself cannot have one without the other. For me turning all my life situations over to my God with complete faith that He will show me my next indicated step is taking action. I am in a relationship that has been dificult over the past year and if not for this program we would have never made it. Peace and blessings to all!


Member: Gina B
Location: Long Beach Calif.
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 11:02:33 AM

Comments

Hi, my name is Gina B alcoholic, I have found that the principle of courage goes hand in hand with the principle of faith. I myself cannot have one without the other. For me turning all my life situations over to my God with complete faith that He will show me my next indicated step is taking action. I am in a relationship that has been dificult over the past year and if not for this program we would have never made it. Peace and blessings to all!


Member: Gina B
Location: Long Beach Calif.
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 11:05:20 AM

Comments

Hi, my name is Gina B alcoholic, I have found that the principle of courage goes hand in hand with the principle of faith. I myself cannot have one without the other. For me turning all my life situations over to my God with complete faith that He will show me my next indicated step is taking action. I am in a relationship that has been dificult over the past year and if not for this program we would have never made it. Peace and blessings to all!


Member: Thomas
Location: Philly
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 1:50:57 PM

Comments

Hi, everyone. 136 days clean. Feel good more now than in the beginning. But still having anxiety over consequences of my actions (legal). Any advice on how to turn off the negative thoughts?


Member: L.W.R
Location: Canada
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 2:26:15 PM

Comments

hello all. i suppose when it comes to relationships/marriage there have been many experts and books and councillors to help us. what i have learned is that there are many options... and none of them have to be hard or hurtful, but keeping it really simple is key... and ask yourself... "self" "today" (cause that's where you have to start,obviously that's the only place you can start) "today" "am i unhappy in this marriage" yes or no. if yes.. then take a break perhaps.. go stay with your parents for a week. take a trip. take some time out.. no big deals here. or maybe just stay where you are and pray to your god that you need him to take care of this if you cannot.. and then be prepared for anything! and believe it or not.. you can even feel excited about waiting to see what he has in store for you. Pay attention to those answers and messages... you know, the ones that "you had nothing to do with" "The ones that were not a result of your meddling with them" in my experience that is god's doing what i could not do for myself. And if you don't know then let it go and wait.. real simple stuff.. this program has taught me that we got all the problems, but god does have ALL OF THE SOLUTIONS, and yes the steps can help, but us humans are sometimes very unsatisfied,, even though we may have alot to be grateful for.. maybe all you need is a more humble attitude.. i mean you have a wife... a buisness.. be satisfied... that's alot! And drawing closer to god may help you feel alot better about her.. how do you think god see's her? maybe you should imitate those qualities. Like spoiled children we often have trouble being happy and just accepting what we have been given, sobriety, a home, a spouse, a livelyhood, these things i would be thanking god almost everyday to have those things, Me: i do have my sobriety, but for the things that you have... i'll have to wait.. cause its not my turn yet (today). wishing you the very best.. hope some of what i have shared will help you, sincerely. god speed.....hmmmm


Member: D.J.W.
Location: CHICAGO
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 2:56:36 PM

Comments

GOD COULD AND WOULD IF HE WERE SOUGHT-KEEP COMING BACK .NOT TRYING TO BE A SMARTASS ONE DAY AT TIME.THIS PROGRAM WORKS IF YOU WORK IT.I'M LIVING PROOF.THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING NORMAN VICENT PEALE MIGHT HELP THERES ONLY ONE WAY TO SOBRIETY YOU GOT TO TAKE THE STEPS.DEAD MAN WALKING AND I'LL KEEP COMING BACK.THAT MIGHT SOUND ALITTLE FUCKED-UP BUT THEM ARE THE FACTS.THANK GOD I'M ALIVE ITS A GREAT DAY.


Member: D.J.W.
Location: CHICAGO
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 3:41:10 PM

Comments

SORRY FOR NOT INTRODUCING MYSELF MY NAME IS D.J. AN I AM A ALCOHOLIC AN AWHOLE LOT OF OTHER SHIT THAT GOES ALONG WITH THE LIFE STYLE I LIVED. ALL'S I CAN SAY IS THANK GOD FOR A.A.SAVED MY (ass) LIFE. THANK YOU ALL FOR SHOWING ME THE WAY.LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL ONE DAY AT A TIME.I'M NOT BULLSHITING YESTERDAY HISTORY TOMORROW A MYSTERY IT'S TODAY THAT COUNTS.THANK ALL YOU AA PEOPLE FOR MY LIFE. IT AIN'T EXACTLY WHAT I WANT IT TO BE . BUT THANK GOD IT AIN'T WHAT IT USE TO BE.THANKYOU AGAIN A.A. FOLLOWSHIP


Member: Janice C.
Location: Kinsman, Ohio
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 4:07:25 PM

Comments

Hi, again, I'm Janice and I'm an alcohilic. I just looked up and saw a little sign that I bought a while ago and forgot that I had. "Courage is fear that has said it's prayers." Sorry to comment again but I just had to write this. I tend to talk too much at live meetings also.


Member: Cec H
Location: Cowtown
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 4:29:58 PM

Comments

Hi all Cec H alkie here. Courage to change the things I can. Well the only think I can change is me and how I look at things. When I got sober all I had was a grade nine education. So the only job's I could get where dishwasher , busboy or fastfoods ie KFC. Well I hate school, but not as much as I hate being poor. So got my 12 and a winter semeister of University. Got a job with the city. Hated it, didn't like the stress or responsablity or dealing with brain dead aldermen and other city officials. Was told to look at the positive thing's about the Job ie Heat in the winter A/C in the Summer, I only work between 11 & 18 days a month and still make $40 grand a year. Also this job is not going to drive me to drink, where as being poor might. I walked out on my common-law wife and daughters after being sober for 22 months, because if I didn't I would have got drunk. It was not an easy decision to make but my sobrity comes first. Another 24 to go please and have one for yourself


Member: Jo R
Location: australia
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 7:47:58 PM

Comments

To cec H, Good on you for going back to school and living your life, not someone elses! Obviously you have alot of courage. Keep on moving foward,you give us all hope.


Member: Nancy R
Location: Charlotte, NC
Date: 2/18/2003
Time: 9:53:58 PM

Comments

Hi - Great topic. All I thought of while reading John's message was "happy, joyous and free." Am I? Do I go home to an unhappy marriage at the end of the day out of "duty?" Is my partner happy? Praying is the key, but I certainly feel I shouldn't be a martyr. Time goes by so quickly and we shouldn't be unhappy with our lives. God will answer those prayers as long as we are open to doing his will. God wants us to be happy in our relationships, not miserable. He will provide. Patience, prayer and open-mindedness. What is meant to happen will happen. Pray to know God's will and ask him for the power to carry out that will. Thanks.


Member: Melanie
Location: Ohio
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 12:12:35 AM

Comments

JO R--AA can help you both learn to live sober. Don't go to every meeting with your spouse. Have at least one women's meeting and he should have a men's group(if these are available.) Also, though you approach this as a couple, each individual must do his/her own work to get and stay sober. You don't have to relapse as a couple if problems arrise! THOMAS--When you notice the negative train of thought, shut it off immediately. Occupy your mind with something else. The Serenity prayer helps. What can you do right this minute to help yourself? Can't change the past, God will make the future right if I take care of today. Read AA lit., help another alcoholic, write about what's bothering you and then pray. Read a book, watch a movie, fix something you've been putting off...you get the idea. I hope I've helped a little. Find your faith, may you find Him now! LOVE.


Member: Thomas
Location: Fla
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 4:41:49 AM

Comments

Thomas here alkie/addict. To Thomas in Philly. I was going to give you some great words of wisdom, but, Melanie said it better than I could have. Thanks Mel. Thomas keep coming back and after you have been here and in the program of AA for a while you will see that there are a whole bunch o dudes named Tom in this program. I havn't figured out why lol, only know this is where this Tom belongs.


Member: KLING
Location: VA
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 10:22:38 AM

Comments

HI! FIRST TIME HERE. COMMENT!! MILES AND MILES OF LITTLE BROWN PILES! PISSED ME OFF!! IM STUCK IN THIS HOUSE NOW FOR FOUR DAYS. NEEDED A MEETING. BUT I DIDN'T NEED TO HEAR FROM PILES. BUT NOW AS I'M TYPING, MAYBE, I DID. I'M STUCK, I KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO, BUT THE COURAGE IS LACKING!!


Member: Andrea M.
Location: Minesota
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 3:30:30 PM

Comments

I believe that we all have courage to change the things we can. The problem is that there is so much seperating me from that courage. I know what I need to change, I know I am capable of changing those things as well. But I find that I am holding back, being lazy, and it is so hard to be sober. I have finally realized just how awful my life was and how unproductive of a person I was. I know I am going to have to push myself harder than I have ever pushed before. I sometimes wonder what does it matter? I guess I just have to "fake it till I make it." I finally have a chance to evaluate my life and ask myself what am I willing to do to maintain my sobriety and better my life. God is my only salvation and can save me from the mess I have created for myself.


Member: MILES AND MILES OF LITTLE BROWN PILES
Location: URANUS
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 3:57:31 PM

Comments

((KLING)) RIGHT ON!! GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU.. IT'S ME MILES AND MILES.... SORRY; REALLY DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING REAL SERIOUS.. HOPE YOU GET THAT COURAGE YOUR LOOKING FOR. MY GOD IS REALLY GOOD TO ME. ALL I HAVE TO DO IS STOP MEDDLING IN MY OWN AFFAIRS, DO WHAT'S NEXT AND LIVE MOMENT TO MOMENT SOMETIMES, I REALLY APPRECIATED THE COMMENTS TODAY.. AT TIMES I HAVE HAD MY HEAD SO FAR UP MY !@# THAT I'VE HAD TO HAVE EMERGENCY SPONSORSHIP TO GET IT OUT..HE HE. CAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW IT AT THE TIME. SELF CENTERED BEHAVIOR.. CELFCENTERED BELLYBUTTON GAZING.. GOD HELP ME IT WAS REALLY GROSS AT THE TIME... TODAY IS LOVELY...GOD BLESS.


Member: Pat G.
Location: Annapolis, Md.
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 5:12:16 PM

Comments

Hi! Pat, a recovering alcholic, sober and a grateful member of A.A. I too had problems with a relationship. I found some help in going to Alanon!!! I took off my AA hat and went to an Alanon meeting. I found this to be much better than paying $25.00 an hr. to a marriage counselor that didn't have a clue about the disease of alcoholism. God speaks through other people so talking to AA and Alanon people helped too! I agree with everyone else's comments on "doing the right thing" and practicing the principles in all our affairs. P.S. I stayed with the guy; we'll be married 45yrs. in December!! (The Promises do come true) Thanks for being here!


Member: FrankD
Location: NJ
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 6:48:17 PM

Comments

I find that the courage to change the things I can mostly applies to myself. Even when I have no control over a situation I can control my reaction to it.


Member: CODY
Location: the wagon
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 7:23:28 PM

Comments

Hi, Cody here. Recovering Alcoholic--amongst other things--This is my first time posting. I don't have access to a car right now, and decided to try this out--great alternative! I just relapsed about a month ago after a year and a half of "sobriety". I quoted that because I was going to meetings and went through a couple treatment centers, but i never really got a sponsor and worked the steps. I started getting really complacent right before my relapse--thinking that I would never drink again and secretly judging those who had. Becoming judgemental and complacent are HUGE red flags for me! Anyway, I'm ready to start over and do it RIGHT this time. I know this program works because i stayed sober for over a year and a half and i was barely working it. I think i was also a little hesitant at being an alcoholic at 20 years of age. But-ya know what- I'm grateful to be an alche and part of this fellowship because we have a blueprint for our lives that 'normee's don't have. Sorry for rambling...and not really sticking to the subject..but i just needed to vent. PEACE ONE DAY AT A TIME


Member: JO R
Location: AUSTRALIA
Date: 2/19/2003
Time: 10:38:07 PM

Comments

TO MELANIE OF OHIO, THANKS FOR THE ADVICE ABOUT NOT RELAPSING WITH MY PARTNER;VERY SOUND. IT IS TOO EASY TO BLAME OTHERS WHEN THINGS GO WRONG! HOPE EVERYONE ISN'T TOO BADLY AFFECTED BY THE SNOW.IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER,SYDNEY IS SWELTERING WITH 32 C AND 68% HUMIDITY!!!!!!!


Member: Sharon F
Location: Portland, Or
Date: 2/20/2003
Time: 11:56:34 PM

Comments

God give me the serenity to accept the things I can Them, the courage to change the things I can ME and the Wisdom to know the difference between them and ME..


Member: Jeff T
Location: Ne
Date: 2/21/2003
Time: 12:05:26 AM

Comments

Jeff, alcoholic. When i find a problem in my life, i have to look at me first then the other man. My preception of others is not always a good one. I at times get this attude like "what about me! dont they know who i am", "if i could only get the bastards to do what i tell them then things would be different". Bla Bla bulls--t. I have found out that nothing happens in Gods world by mistake. I am were i am today for a reason. Its all planed out already all i have to do is try & understand (try) to find out what Gods will is for me today & the rest will all work out in the end. Finding the "wisdom" to know the differnce, not the "courage" is the answer for me. Courage is not that elusive. If we didnt have courage we would not be here trying to better our lives now would we ?


Member: Bob B
Location: Scotland UK
Date: 2/21/2003
Time: 11:54:42 AM

Comments

Hi Bob here, recovering alcoholic but with only four months behind me at present. I'm a bit confused at present - I thought I was handling things OK but feel I may be tumbling headlong into complacency and I'm frankly terrified of a relapse. I'm now back in Scotland after a week in the Baltimore region and the trip was epic. I spent a lot of time sitting in Dulles with only the bar in terminal D open. I didn't drink but I kept thinking that the 'bar people' were just amateurs. It takes an arrogant insane mind to think like that doesn't it? That's the sort of thinking that kept me an active, practicing alcoholic for years. I've got to change my thinking habits and learn some humility. Trouble is everything has gone so well since I got into AA. I mean really began to understand it and work on the steps. Personal life is fine, I'm still in a job I love, I still have a driving licence etc. No real shit happened - it almost did - but that 's still a 'yet'. So here I go being complacent again - I don't seem to be able to tackle step six with any degree of conviction. Perhaps I like my hang ups too much. Admitting my personality defects is one thing turning them all over is another. It's rather like saying 'Please God, make me perfect - but not just yet.' Anyway ta to all the guys at the Friday meeting at Edmonton Church in Baltimore for making me feel welcome last week. You will remain in my prayers.


Member: D.J.W
Location: SOMEWHERE AROUND CHICAGO
Date: 2/21/2003
Time: 6:02:03 PM

Comments

D.J.W.HERE STILL HANGING AROUND.COURAGE TO CHANGE.MAYBE I'LL TRY THAT BUTTON ON THE LEFT.Taking advice from other drunks or from anyone has been one of the hardest things I,ve ever had to do .I could have saved myself alot of heartache and time. My thinking was opinions are like assholes everybody got one.Well alchol and drugs kicked my ass so bad it taught me How to listen.Taught me,whom to hang with AND WHOSE advice i should take.Enough to know that all my answers are in this program.GOD FIRST . I got a thinking problem,My buddy says HELL TAKE MY ADVICE ,I DON'T USE IT.DON.T DRINK AND GO TO MEETING.AND WHEN YOU GET TIRED OF THAT. EXERCISE-DON,T DRINK AND GO TO MEETINGS.It works If ya work it.THANKS FOR THE ADVICE Y,LL AND I,LL KEEP COMING BACK.


Member: Stephanie D
Location: Chicago
Date: 2/21/2003
Time: 10:50:21 PM

Comments

Hi all, Stephanie, alcoholic. (((Liz))) Bienvenue! (((Thomas))) Melanie's right, shut it off. Here's a formula: 7 words. God Don't Let Me Think That Way! Over and over (and over) - it works. (((Rich P.))) I found a Woburn list by searching on "alcoholics anonymous meetings massachusetts" when I travelled there recently. TOPIC: in earlier sobriety, "accept the things I cannot change" was the focus for me of the Serenity Prayer. A couple years later, "courage to change" is the big line. I have two sponsors and a spiritual advisor. Sponsor 1 has been encouraging therapy for me. #2 supports her but less enthusiastically, just thinks it's a good idea. The SA is dead set against it, and he's my earliest friend in the program, bringing me to God and my sponsors. I was avoiding the issue but last wkend almost relapsed. I have an appt now for next week with a therapist. If, when I'm in fear, I pray for courage and willingness, I find the courage is there when I need it. Tomorrow I see the SA so he can kick my butt for what he thinks is turning away from the program. I'm serene and comfortable w/the decision, but wish me luck anyway! Thank God for this program and the people it has brought into my life. John, since my near-relapse I've been saying the Serenity Prayer, 3rd Step, 7th Step and St. Francis Prayer several times daily. The ritual brings me peace. Keep coming back, it works!


Member: Stephanie again
Location: Chicago
Date: 2/21/2003
Time: 10:55:02 PM

Comments

Sorry, one more quick thing - Bob from Scotland, early sobriety is a bitch and there's a white-knuckle time even if you're working the steps. It takes time. I wasn't taken to the 4th step until almost a year. Give God time, don't rush it. Don't quit before the miracle happens. Stay out of bars!!! I was told, if you don't want to get hit by a train, STAY OFF THE F'ING TRACKS! Keep coming back and I'll remember you in my prayers.


Member: AZbill
Location: Sierra Vista, Arizona
Date: 2/21/2003
Time: 11:43:02 PM

Comments

HI Bob From Scotland. I was born in Baltimore which makes me a Baltimoron. I bet you ate good there... Bye the way it is pronounced phonetically as Ballimurmarelyn all one word LOL Bill az-bill@mindspringl.com


Member: D.J.W.
Location: RIGHT OUTSIDE CHICAGO
Date: 2/22/2003
Time: 10:51:11 AM

Comments

THE THINGS WHICH ARE IMPOSSIBLE WITH MAN ARE POSSIBLE WITH GOD. GAIN CONFIDENCE I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH JESUS CHRIST WHOM STRENGTHENS ME. GOOD LUCK TO ALL THE DRY DRUNKS WHO THINK THEY CAN DO THIS THING WITHOUT GOD. PEACE TO ALL,AND HAVE A GREAT DAY,KEEP COMING BACK.GOD LOVES YOU AND SO DO I. GOD SAVED ME FROM KILLING MYSELF. A.A KEEPS ME IN CHECK.THANKYOU A.A.AND GOD. THERE IS NOTHING IN THIS DAY,THAT GOD ,A.A.,AND ME CAN'T HANDLE,IN THAT ORDER IT WORKS. ALL'S I WAS TRYING TO SAY WAS HAVE A GREAT DAY.


Member: L-RAY
Location: LOST IN SPAIN
Date: 2/22/2003
Time: 12:39:42 PM

Comments

Hi ((((Bob)))) welcome buddy , have a word with your sponser Bob and maybe he will put you at ease! when i came to the six and seven my sponser was helpful !half measures " just think you went to the states and back sober! that for a alkie only 4 months sober is a great acheivment your doing well Bob ,best of luck, Scotland for ever! regards L-Ray


Member: M.J. W.
Location: Tennnessee
Date: 2/22/2003
Time: 2:51:37 PM

Comments

hi i am Mary Jane, and yes I am also an alcholic I aam having avery hard time even typing this because of the tremors I have had counseling but i just seem to fall off of the wagon. Iam willing to hear any advvicce. alll i know that ill be sober for the rest of today. thanks.


Member: Melanie
Location: Ohio
Date: 2/23/2003
Time: 12:01:37 AM

Comments

Hi Mary Jane, Welcome! I'm an alcoholic woman, too. I had tremors, too. I needed medical attention and live A.A. meetings to get and stay sober. Go to a meeting. Find A.A. in your phone book and find out where to go. Another alcoholic woman may even be available to meet you and talk with you, we do that! It's scary to go to your first meeting, but you will find kind people there who know how to help you in ways your counselor can't. Love and prayers for you!